Unedited
* * *

I've never been this glued to my phone before. Ever since sent Eren the message I've been biting my nails enough to leave stubs for fingers. Not literally.

"Excuse me," I say for what felt like the hundredth time. My steps are slow and uneven as I sipped through the school grounds on my way to the dorm.

More and more people begin to question what the hell I'm doing. It appears to others like I'm playing some sort of game, when in reality my emotions are what's being played with.

I continuously nibble on my bottom lip before I run into yet another wall. I curse at the wall as if they were the cause of your collision, but I know very well it was me who caused it.

"Fucking reply already, jeez."

I sound impatient, but that's because I am. How long does it take for someone reply with an 'of course I forgive you'? Isabel never explained to me that I had to wait for Eren to reply, I thought I just had to send the message and boom, problem solved. I guess it isn't that easy.

By the time I reach the dorms, I've managed to run into the entire human race. The hallways to the rooms were empty, leaving me with a less likely chance to run into more people. Reaching my room, I hesitate to open the door, in fear of Eren being inside.

I lean against the door, my ear pressing against the cold wood. I hear mumbling, so someone is definitely inside. A part of me wanted it to be Eren, then another hoped it wasn't.

If it was Eren, how would I face him? Do I pretend I never sent the text message? Do I avoid him? Do I act like everything's okay? What the hell and I supposed to do!?

I should have thought about this sooner because when I decided to sneak away and go to Farlan's room instead, a taller man that I have never seen before exits the room. He seems to be startled by my lurking, so I give him a glower to make it appear as if he was the one who was to blame for his own startle.

"Ah, I didn't know they let kids attend this school," says the male with golden brown eyes.

His undercut was similar to mine, but his hair was a lighter, more ash colored and it was longer than my undercut. It was colored differently too, the undercut was dark but the hair that sat in an unkempt fluff on top was ashy-brown. Strange.

Nonetheless he carried similar personality traits like Eren, but was less attractive and had a strange fave structure that resembled an animal more than an actual human. It took me a moment to realize that he had just insulted me for my height.

"And I didn't know they let animals on campus," I retort.

The other raises a hand, balling it into a fist. "Why I outta-"

"Jean, lay off will yah? You wouldn't want to get into problems at a school you don't go to," says Eren as he emerges from behind the other.

I can feel my heart skip a beat, though a part of me already expected Eren to be in the room. He glances at me, but doesn't gaze for long. He flicks the back of Jean's head and tells him that he had to be more considerate. Jean leaves with a huff and tells Eren he'd see him later on tonight. Eren waves the other off before looking at me with a hard expression.

"Hey," he says.

"Hey."

"Are you gonna come in or what?" He asks, his mood lighter than before. He gives me a smirk, something that only he understood at this moment.

I can feel my cheeks burn as i duck my head low, entering the room. He closes the door behind me and walks to his bed, plopping on it with a heavy sigh. He lays back while I take a seat on my own, but I lean forward. My arms rest upon my legs as I stare at Eren, waiting for him to comment.

"What are you staring at?" He asks, perking his head up to see me.

"N-nothing," I stutter. I avert my gaze to the bathroom door, slightly embarrassed with how i was acting. How selfish could I be to think that Eren had cared about the message.

Then again, he was talking to me.

"You know, you need to stop being so weird. You're never gonna get a man acting like that," he jokes as he lunges forward, our positions now matching.

"What?"

"Never mind," he snorts. "You just need to lighten up and have some fun, you're too stressed. I've noticed that lately."

Why is he acting as if nothing had ever happened? Didn't he read the- Oh, I get it now.

"And what do you suggest I do?" I ask with a raising brow.

"Come to the Rose party tonight, with me."

"Jeez, everyone's talking about that stupid party. What's so great about it?"

Eren only laughs, finding my frustration amusing. He begins to explain to me the significance of the party. Apparently, Rose throws this every year in celebration of the end of No Shave November.

When I asked him to elaborate, he tells me that every year, in the month of November, men don't shave their personal areas. He says he doesn't know why they don't, it's just something that they do. Still confused, I ask him the for the connection between the two.

"Let me finish," he says as he clears his throat, "every year, Rose throws a party on the thirtieth of November, which is today. At midnight, everyone celebrates the end of No Shave November by getting laid hair-free. Don't ask why they do this, people just do."

"Okay...?"

"This year," he continues, "Erwin and Mike are hosting the party at Rose University, and they said that the only way to get in is if you were invited, and if you were you were allowed to bring a plus one." Eren pauses for a moment to let the information sink in. I only nod, asking him to continue. "Usually, the plus one is the person they get laid with, but since I can get that any other time I just wanna go for the heck of it. There will be free drinks, hot chicks, and the best part: free food."

"Wait- you want me to go to sleep with you?" I blurt out

"Weren't you listening? I'm just going because I want a good time, not because I wanna sleep with you! Though that would be nice," he says seductively with a smirk.

My insides turn, and I don't know if I want to puke or feel flattered. I duck my head low, my cheeks beginning to flash a light shade of crimson.

"So are you going with me it not?" he asks.

"Do I have a choice?"

"You do, you don't have to go. You can just say no, but don't regret it."

* * *

"Levi, you're taking way too much time getting ready," complains Eren as he rests against the wall.

I couldn't decide on what to wear. I've never been to a party before, so deciding on an outfit that didn't make me stand out as a 'loser' was harder than I thought. I hardly had any 'cool' looking clothes. I mainly owned sweater vests, plain button-ups, t-shirts and one too many slacks ranging from khaki to black, not to mention the occasional turtlenecks that I dare not wear around Eren.

"Calm your tits," I retort. "I've never don't something like this before."

"Do you want my help?" he asks, already walking to to his dresser.

"No."

"Too bad, you're wearing my shirt," he declares as he tosses me an old band shirt.

I quickly catch it, examining the awful design. "Do you have anything less ugly?"

"Says the one that looks like his mother still dresses him," he mumbles as he rummages through his drawer.

"Excuse me?"

"Oh nothing, here try this," he says as he tosses me a dark plaid, button-up top. "Just wear a plain white shirt under and a pair of black ripped jeans jeans."

"I don't own-"

He tosses me a pair of his own. "Roll up the ends."

I send him a glower and he gives me a 'what-are-you-waiting-for' kind of look. I roll my eyes and huff into the bathroom, slamming the door behind me. While I change, Eren coaches me on how I should act. Since this was my first party, I shouldn't behave any differently and that I should 'play it cool.' Easy for him to say, he's done this countless of times before.

Once i finish I stroll out of the bathroom, tugging on the plaid shirt and examining the new outfit. I didn't quite like it, for it wasn't really my taste in style. The jeans were too long, the plaid shirt slightly longer than my hips and the sleeves as well were too long. I looked like a gangster trying to be cool.

Eren snorts and I send him a glower.

"What? You look great!" he says, trying to hide his giggle.

"Shut up, brat. You're the one that said it would look good, but I look like someone that's trying to deal drugs."

"Speaking of drugs, don't take anything that someone offers you," he warns. "And I'm serious, you look good, we can cut the ends of the pants to fit you better. Maybe a new pair of shoes too. Actually I'll stop by the store and buy you some new pants," he offers, already taking hold of the wallet from the top drawer of his nightstand.

"You don't have to, it's just a party."

"But I want to, and besides, you're my date. I wouldn't want you to look bad," he says as he holds the door open for me.

I pinch my brows together and frown, following behind him. "This isn't a date," I retort.

"Whatever you say."

* * *

"I look stupid."

"You look great."

"You're only saying that to make me feel better."

"Maybe."

I met out a groan, letting my head bang against the airbag compartment of Eren's car. I looked like some sort of popstar from a magazine, and I wasn't feeling it. Besides, the stupid scarf was suffocating me. I pry it off my neck and throw it at Eren.

"Come on, let's go before I choke you with that stupid scarf," I command as I exit Eren's car.

He chuckles. "I wouldn't mind that," he says with a smirk.

"Oh, shut up."

We walk side by side through the student parking lot. Every spot was taken, Eren himself had trouble finding a space. It made me question how many people were actually there, probably too many that I didn't care about

Small ghosts escape our lips as we walk in silence, letting the coolness of the night sink in. The stars aren't quite visible yet, but the moon was fine alky beginning to disappear in the horizon. Streaks of orange and pink line behind the buildings of Rose University, giving off some sort of godly aura, as if it we were meant to be there.

Eren was the first to break the silence, which didn't bother me since it felt awkward.

"So, I year the guy Hanji likes is hosting the party with a friend. I think she said his name was Mike," Eren tells me as we step onto the curb, finally leaving the lot.

I nod, not really caring who these people were. I was never going to see them again after this, so it didn't really matter if I knew their names or not.

"Oh really?" I say questionably, as if I were actually interested.

"Yeah, I hear Mike is a bit strange. He can play the drums though," Eren explains.

"Cool." Not really.

We eventually weave our way through Rose's campus, their layout much different from ours. It takes us almost fifteen minutes to arrive at the Event Center where the party is held. When we reached the building I could feel the vibrations of the music rattle the ground below us, the speakers booming with music that could only be described as awful.

A part of me feels uneasy, yet I'm excited. I was finally going to be like the cool kids, see what they saw, and do what they did. I wasn't that kid being picked on anymore, I was finally going to get a chance to be the bigger man. I'm ready. I've been ready.

The very moment we enter through the main doors a rush of hot, musty air mixed with the smell of alcohol and tobacco hits me like a bullet to the heart. I immediately cough, gagging on the unpleasant scent. Eren pats my back, a frown upon his face.

"You okay?" He asks.

"I'm fine, it reeks in here " I complain with a cough.

Eren opens his mouth to speak once more, but is interrupted by a larger male. He stands taller than us, his eyes similar to Armin's. He slaps Eren on the back making him tumble forward.

"You made it, Eren!" He says cheerfully. "This is your plus one?" He asks, looking over at me. He she's hello before asking Eren if I was his boyfriend.

I gag again.

"No, he isn't," Eren replies, somewhat dejected. He leans in to whisper something to the taller blonde. "Not yet," he snickers.

"Ah, you're a sly one, Eren. I'll let you two go, the bar is over there," he says as he points last us to a room. "You can order anything there, just keep it to a minimum. We promised the professors that we'd serve alcoholic drinks soaringly."

Eren thanks the male and he runs off again to another group of people. I shake my head, asking Eren who he was. He explains that he was one of the hosts, and that his name was Erwin. I nod, understanding now what Hanji meant by his eyebrows being monstrous and thick, though I didn't see where the supposed sexiness came in.

Nonetheless, Eren and I roam around the building. There was a stage where a live band, they songs I didn't know. They were loud, making everyone speak somewhat louder than normal for the music was blasting through speakers. It was practically impossible for to hear someone speak, even if they were right next to you.

The band wasn't that bad, now that I think about it. The longer we stayed, the more I grew used to their songs. Even though I only knew few rock songs, some were in a language no one really knew, I still going myself bobbing my head to the music.

Eren and I decided to sit at the bar and order a drink. Eren ordered a regular can of Bud Light, while I ordered a plane water. As we sat there, sipping on opposite drinks, Eren and I began a normal conversation. He asked about what I thought so far, if I thought the party was good or not and I respond with shrugs and simple 'I don't know' responses.

It was ten minutes into our conversation that Erwin had finally returned with Hanji pressed against his side, dazed and drunk. He asked for Eren's help with something on stage, and Eren agreed. He asks me to stay put, and Erwin asked me to watch over Hanji until he got back.

"Jeez, Hanji. How many drinks did you have?" I ask, smelling the alcohol on her breath.

"Just a few," she slurs happily. "Why don't you have a few yourself? It'll loosen you up a bit," she suggests as she orders a few shots.

The bartender raised a brow as he slides her two shots. She thanks him with a smile before shoving one in my direction. She looks at me seriously, the crazed look in her eyes still there and growing.

"Drink it," she orders.

I set it on the counter and push it away, refusing the offer of alcohol. I don't drink, only because I know what will happen if I do. The last time I drank was behind my mother's back at my uncle's fourth wedding. Never again will I drink like that, I still don't remember what I did that night, but my uncle won't let it go.

"I don't drink," I tell her. "And you've had once too many," so warn, taking away the shot before it reached her lips.

"Awe, Levi. Don't ruin the fun~" she whines.

"I'm not ruining anything, I'm actually saving your life. You can thank me when you're sober."

She pouts, her eyes looming over me as she stands to lean on my shoulder. Her body drapes over me, and I almost drop the small shot glass from the sudden weight. She giggles, her breath lingering the strong scent of alcohol. She whispers inaudible words, slurring each word.

"Why don't you have a few drinks?" She slurs.

"I don't drink," I say in a serious tone, setting down the shot glass upon the counter.

"Awe, come in Levi~ if you have two shots, I'll stop drinking. Just two, that's all it takes," she says drunkenly as she holds up three fingers.

I contemplate whether or not if I should trust her, knowing the state of mind she was in. She would probably have no memory of this promise fifteen minutes from now, but a part of me didn't really care at this point.

A small voice in the back of my head shadows over my common sense as I take hold of the shot glass, pressing it against my lips. The smell is sour and strong. I wanted to gag at the awful scent, but I also wanted to feel the same high as Hanji. If someone like Hanji could take a few shots and be in a haze of oblivion, I would like to know how I could also be that way.

Voices of my own mind begin to whisper, telling me that I should drink, that I needed to. If I did, all stress and self awareness would renovate to a whimsical and carefree persona. If I could only escape reality for one moment, I would. So here, pressed against my parched lips, sits the remedy for freedom of my own mind.

Hanji grins wildly as I take the shot, letting the burning sensation fade into a tangy zing of hallucination.

* * *

"What are you talking about," I snort, "I didn't have a single drink!" Eren grasps me by the shoulders, his eyes trying to follow mine as I gaze off into space.

"A single drink, eh? Then what do you call these?" He asks, turning me towards the counter. There sat twelve shot glasses, all organized in a single filed line. He raises a brow, holding me steady.

"Like I said, not a single drink."

"Smart ass," he mumbles. He turns his attention towards Erwin, who is still sober, to apologize for my immaturity.

While the two converse with one another on a different subject, Eren asks me to stay put, warning me now that we'd be leaving shortly. But I couldn't do that, not with Hanji tugging on my arm. She's giggly now, her eyes in a craze as she convinces me to follow her backstage. Of course, I follow, already forgetting Eren's command.

We sloppily drag each other backstage to find a raging male with a set of drumsticks. He bickers to his band mates, complaining that they were too drunk to perform. The members divorce one another in angry terms, leaving the drummer alone with Hanji and I.

"I'm not signing autographs," he states once he notices our presence.

Hanji snorts before leaning on my shoulder. "We don't want autographs, we want to join the band," she announces proudly.

"We do?" I question in a loud whisper.

"Of course we do," she replies with the same tone of voice.

"Mike Zacharias is part of no band," he says as he slumps onto a broken speaker box. "No Name is No More."

Hanji sloppily picks up an electric guitar and says, "nonsense! It's right here!" She begins to play, shredding the notes as her hands dance along the metallic strings. I recognize the song, it the lyrics are so clear to me that I don't even notice myself humming along.

Apparently, I wasn't humming at all. I was singing along to a song, foreign from my native tongue, and Mike notices this for he was grinning like a madman.

He begins to laugh hysterically, clapping wildly. Hanji stops playing and I stop mid verse, my body flinching from the sudden roar of laughter. Mike gives Hanji and I a slap on the back, huddling us closer together.

"How would you two like to close the show for me? Just this once?"

Hanji didn't hesitate to answer. She slaps Mike on the back, causing him to cough from the harsh impact. "Of course!"

Mike grins wider now as he reaches into his pockets for two strips of cloth. He orders us to wrap our faces, not wanting us to reveal our identities to the audience. Apparently, it was their signature look.

I didn't think twice about the idea, not really caring at any point. I wrap the cloth around my eyes lazily before being handed a microphone. Hanji's glasses are removed, and her hair is swept into a ponytail once more.

I can only see through one eye now, my body being dragged onto the stage by Hanji who seems to be enjoying the whole situation.

The stage I larger than I thought, and I was placed in center. It was still dark, the crowd on an uproar as they demanded a closing number. Mike comes over to me, whispering to me the song I'd be singing. I immediately feel nauseous, realizing what I would be doing.

The voice of common sense I'd faintly heard now. They yell to me, telling every little part of my mind that I shouldn't be doing this, that taking those shots had gotten me into a dilemma I had to escape from.

But it was too late now.

Mike was spotted by a dim light, the audience cheering as he announced that the final number would begin. He introduced the song, a song I knew well. I had just sang it moments before, but then I was oblivious to my choices and movements. Now, I'm aware if the fright surging through me, wanting to escape in the darkness I was still embedded in.

I was too slow.

The entire room is pitch black again, and Mike gives me a nudge before running to his seat behind the drum set.

The audience is screaming again, roaring and cheering for the band No Name, for which we were not actually a part of.

It wasn't until Mike began to play the first instrument break that I feel the rush of adrenaline surge through me. A sense of power and confidence take over the nauseous feeling of the regret from drinking. I grin evilly, the lights now flashing on, all eyes stare at me and the rest if the group.

I grip onto the microphone, holding it close as the drumming stops.

"Kneel down, pigs."

* * *

I don't remember much after the performance. All I do know is that I killed it, or so Hanji said.

It's nearly three in the morning and I'm draped over Farlan's back. He carries me through the parking lot, his breaths uneven from my weight being forced on him. We have returned to Sina's campus along with several others who were drunk off their knocker.

I giggle, cracking the world's worst jokes into Farlan's ear; only it wasn't Farlan, it was actually Eren who was carrying me, but I didn't know that.

"What do you call a shaking milkshake? A cow!" I burst into laughter, not realizing my joke was all wrong and that I had given it away poorly. I snort, wiping away a fake tear with a free hand, the other tightly secure around Eren's chest.

He doesn't respond. He takes in these awful jokes, rolling his eyes and cursing himself for letting me slip from his sight.

"Alright," he says with a sigh as he opens the door to our room, "time to shut down for the night."

"It's barely midnight!" I slur with a giggle before being dropped onto my bed. I murder inaudible words as I unconsciously slide under my covers. "Hey, Farlan," I whisper to Eren.

Knowing I was in a drunk state, Eren doesn't go against my command as he pretends to be Farlan for the night. He bends down with a hum.

"Don't tell Eren this, but he looked really hot in that crowd."

"Oh really?" He replies.

"Yeah, did I tell you what Isabel told me," I say, my eyes barely being held open.

"No, what did she say?" Eren asks, now amused with the conversation.

"She thinks I love Eren."

"And do you?"

"I don't know," I say with a yawn before rolling to my side. "Maybe I do."

Eren flusters, a grin tugging at his lips. He looks down at my now sleeping body, running a hand through my greasy hair. I don't feel him slide in under the covers, his body lightly pressed against mine. He wraps an arm around me, nuzzling his head into the crook of my neck.

"Hey, Farlan?"

"Hm?"

"Don't tell Eren."

* * *

Author's Note:

Hopefully this long, trashy chapter makes up for my lack of updates. I had testing all last week (SAT + ACT + State Tests) and I'm dead.

I tried to make this chapter interesting, but I think I failed. ┐(￣ヮ￣)┌ oh whale, I tried.

Hopefully you liked it, I'll try and update again this week.

Thank you for 1.01k reads, 170+ votes, and 300+ comments ^^ I appreciate it very much ♥

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4,400 words