PART SIXTY ONE

                                                              ❝I'm here I'll always be here.❞

I thought, being separated or whatever normal people called it. Would have changed Jack's abusive tendencies, I was incorrect as usual.  When I opened the door, I saw Jack sitting there smoking on our bed, Evie on the floor messing with a table leg.

"Hey, how was the day?" I asked pulling off my shirt turning to him, Jack glanced at me.

"Boring, I can't imagine how you felt for a week having to be alone with her all day." He said laughing. I froze, halfway through taking off my jeans. I shrugged.

"I mean it was fine." I said, acting like I hadn't spent those days in a drug induced haze. Jack traced his finger over my bare stomach. He continued tracing around my underwear. I stepped back.

"It's so crazy to me that your body created our child." He said, gesturing to Evie. When I glanced over at her, I saw the needle I'd had today in her hand.

"Shit!" I panicked, running over to her to yank it out of her hand. Her little fingers  tightened around it. I yanked harder, my hand touching the end of it. I rung my hand out before taking the needle away from her. Jack scooped her up, checking her small body for any needle marks. I tossed mine in the trash, which I placed on top of the dresser.

"Shit." Jack said, and I panicked again. I scanned my baby's body for the same thing, there was none. I glanced at Jack, who's face was a mix of anger and fear. I laid a hand on his shoulder.

"Are you okay?" I asked and he shook his head. He laid Evie down, and glared at me.

"What the fuck." He said, and I shrugged., I hated this tone of voice. I knew what was going to happen but I was seriously too tired to care, I laid down next to him and rolled over. I'd decided, I would not engage with him.

"Goodnight." I said, taking a sip from the bottle still on the nightstand. Swallowing, I shut my eyes. I could still here Jack's breathing, and my daughter's laughing. I felt a smile cross my face. Jack touched my shoulder. I said nothing.

"Kaitlyn." His voice, cutting deeply. I rolled to face him.

"God, if your gonna hurt me can you do it now and get it over with?" I asked, not in any mood to hear a lecture. Jack shook his head, pulling me to sit up next to him.

"We gotta be more careful, with her. I got scared, it's not your fault, just, you know." 

I nodded, I leaned my head against his shoulder.

"I don't know how to do this." I whispered.  Jack ran a hand through my hair.

"What do you mean?"

"My family was supposed to protect me, I swore I would protect my daughter. But I don't think, I'm a good person." I said. Jack shrugged.

"Do you remember a while back when you asked if I wanted a wife, or kids?" I nodded. I did, he'd been cleaning his gun while I sat on the floor.

"I said I'd end up beating on my kid, but when I look at our daughter I doubt I'd ever hurt her." He said. I nodded, this made me feel midly sad, as I had doubted what he would do to my child. 

"You still don't want a wife though?" I asked smiling and he rolled his eyes. 

"I do-" 

"Just not me?"

He shoved me playfully.

"I do, just not right now when everything's so, hard." 

I laughed, still having the immaturity of a twelve year old. Jack, got what I was laughing at almost immediatley and snorted.

"Is that a come on?"

"If I can come on you, sure."