Adam could feel Jacob wiggling around in his sleep. The man was too wiggly to be out of Little Space though, so he smiled internally and kept his eyes closed to see what he would do.

Jacob sat up and he could feel him willing his Daddy to wake up. Adam could almost see the soft, imploring look as he waited. It took every iota of self control he had not to smirk. He whined under his breath and pulled his blanket off of Adam to climb off of the bed with a small thud.

He heard movement down there so he popped open an eye to see him trying to stand. Dizzy and pale, he looked a lot more hungover today than he did yesterday. Possibly even having stronger withdrawals.

Quickly the main cause of his distress was evident: the Little needed to be changed. He shifted around in his diaper and let out a sound of annoyance. "Adam."

He would get no response with that, in fact Adam turned over and faked a sleeping sigh as he readjusted.

"Daddy?"

Adam sat up like he was possessed and scooted over to him. "Good morning, baby boy. Do you need to be changed?"

He blushed and looked away as he nodded. "I need to go more."

Adam tipped his head and eyed the padding. It wasn't quite full yet. "These diapers are made for Little boys like you. Go again and we'll change you in a bit."

"Daddy, my head smarts." He brushed a hand through his hair and hunkered down further. "I-I want up."

Humming his understanding he got up to pick him up and snuggle him close for rocking and millions of kisses. "My sweet boy, my poor baby. I'll get you some pain medicine."

Adam brought him to the kitchen and scowled in frustration. Jacob was way too Little to sit in a chair, he'd get distracted by everything and wander off. He was stuck in his headspace like he was supposed to be, and Adam was unprepared. He wouldn't put a two year old in a chair to eat, so why would he put Jacob there?

The couch was a viable choice but he also really didn't want to spend tomorrow cleaning off spilled drinks and applesauce when they had things to talk about. A little anxiety crept up at that so he pushed it down and focused on the little boy starting to fuss into his neck. "Okay, baby. Daddy's gonna put you on his lap to eat, and then do you wanna go on a short adventure when you're feeling better?"

"Won't people stare?" He sounded anxious and afraid, and Adam could imagine he worried people might recognize him.

But he was grateful they lived in a small town hidden from most public eyes and people were few. A much bigger city was 20 minutes away but thankfully the traffic didn't often come to visit them there, so ultimately he was rarely recognized and probably wouldn't be in his pj's.

Adam rolled his eyes where Jack couldn't see it. As far as he was concerned the people who would dare to judge them could all lick his log cutter. "Daddy will protect you."

He nodded weakly. "Alright. I like adventures."

Adam chuckled and grabbed him more applesauce and ibuprofen, quickly urging him to swallow before they mixed too much together. "Good job! You're getting so good at that!"

When he pinched his cheek, Jacob puckered his lips for a kiss Adam happily provided, and then one more to each cheek. "Okay, you can cuddle until your head stops hurting so bad. Go find the couch!"

His animated and soothing Daddy voice made Jacob grin and crawl off to find it. Adam admired how precious he was before pulling a sippy cup out of the cabinet and filling it with water. Jacob would need to rehydrate today, that was the main thing with alcohol and cocaine. He sighed to himself quietly, wondering about the reactions between the two.

His Little boy had been struggling without him knowing it, and he filled with searing guilt. His actions were his own, yes, but Adam seldom missed when something was up with his husband. Jacob had mentioned how helpful it had been so many times and now Adam was slacking.

Adam couldn't help but think hard about if he had missed anything. Jacob was an exceptional masker. He'd been a little quiet but he couldn't think of much else. They'd been so busy lately, Adam had been busy. Between ghost writing, singing, and the animated social media page he had, there wasn't much free time he'd had to give his partner during peak monetization months and album release season.

He swore right then and there he'd make more time for him. Perhaps Jacob had been bored. He was hyperactive; he needed mental stimulation and human interaction like a puppy.

"DADDY!" Adam snapped out of it to turn and see Jacob was on the couch staring at him with wide, sad eyes. "Daddy why are you crying?"

The scene was stupid cute, he could imagine what had happened in his disassociation: Jacob had wandered up to the TV and grabbed the remotes, then climbed onto the couch to hit all of the buttons. It reminded him of their little impending adventure. Jacob loved buttons Little or not, and his heart ached with love. "Baby, can Daddy ask you something?"

He nodded cheerfully and Adam was pleased with the color back in his face and that his headache seemed to be fading. Walking up to kneel in front of him, he tried for a smile. "Baby, do I need to pay more attention to you? I know I've been working a lot and not home these past few months more often than not and I was just wondering if you would like me to take some time off after this next week?"

Jacob's eyes widened and he glanced away guiltily, further sealing the deal. "I've been missing you a lot. I get... sad when you're gone all the time."

Adam sighed his relief and leaned over to hug him. He was relieved that it was such an easy fix, and that Jacob hadn't tried to lie to him about it. "Thank you for telling the truth. That makes Daddy feel so much better."

The Little giggled and nuzzled into his neck. It made Adam's sadness melt away to know he was so regressed he didn't let his upset leak into him. He stayed sweet and innocent the way he liked him to be like this.

"I want to go on a venture now," Jack told him, nudging him back.

Adam smiled big and nodded. "Okay, but first I want to feed you a bit more. Are you still feeling sick?"

He shook his head ardently and reached for his blanket only to find it wasn't there. His eyes drifted to the couch beside him and his brows furrowed in the beginning of a cry over it.

Adam couldn't take it. He couldn't stand to see him looking like that so he backtracked it to the bedroom and surrounded him in it. The sadness disappeared when he rubbed it on his cheek and he settled back to cuddle with it. "I'll be right back, okay? You can go out in your pajamas—,"

"Jimjams!"

"I'm not going to say that, Jack," Adam chuckled. "Just hold on."

He threw together scrambled eggs with some cheese and meat, and hidden vegetables under the cheese. As long as Jacob couldn't perceive them, it would be fine. Littles thought vegetables were poison every time and Jack thought the exact same thing as an adult.

He ate happily and hummed, and Adam showered him with praise the whole time. This was a release for him too, being a Daddy meant he had to break out of his walls that would sometimes still come up when he tried to be affectionate. Jack needed him, and that was enough to make him easily forget his normal habits.

After he felt that he'd been sufficiently fed, he checked his diaper and changed it, laughing at the way he crossed his arms and pouted at the ceiling. "I really love having you in diapers, I just wanted to let you know."

"Why?" He asked snottily.

Oh god, not this again. He had to shut that down immediately. It was cute, but unacceptable.

"Because it means you trust me, and I feel so much happier when I know you need me," He confessed, keeping his eyes on the task so he wouldn't have to look him in the face. Emotions were welling up, and he didn't want to upset him.

After he was done Jacob sat up to hug him tight. "I'll always need you, Daddy. Even when I have to be big." He took a nervous breath and looked up at him. "Even when I do bad stuff."

"Oh, Jack..." Adam started to cry like Jacob had pulled the load bearing piece out of his emotional dam. He held him probably tighter than he should have. "I'm sorry... I-I'm so so sorry, sometimes Daddies get in their heads and they do a bad job but I'm trying so hard..."

Jacob wiggled away and buried his lips into his cheek over and over until Adam's tears stopped and he was frozen to the assault of innocence. "It's okay to be sad."

What a magnificent little creature.

He wiped at his face and laughed, returning the kisses. "You're... you're right. Come on, we're going on a trip."

It was only a minor hassle to get him out the door, he kept wandering toward the garden to play with the flower petals. "Jack, come on!" He begged gently.

"Daddy, lookit this one!" Jacob exclaimed instead. "This one's green."

Adam snapped a picture of him leaning down to smell it. "Yeah, that's a peony, baby. Daddy grew them for you."

He was about to encourage him to get in the car but then his sunshine giggled at a monarch landing on the rose bush. "Look! A butterfly!"

He reached for it but Adam got in his way to carefully gather the small thing onto his shirt instead of his hand. "You never touch butterflies with your hand, baby. It damages them. But you can look."

Jacob cautiously scooted closer and glanced up at Adam. "I wanna see more butterflies, I want to see green ones."

He distracted Adam for a good while showing him pictures of butterflies and looking at observatories they could visit when he was feeling better both physically and mentally.

Then after taking a million or so pictures, finally Adam sat the damn Little in the car himself. He couldn't focus when he was being so effortlessly cute but the store wasn't open all day.

Adam buckled his seatbelt and kissed his cheek goofily, trying to pull more laughter from him. It worked, Jacob grabbed at his face to hold him there for, "More kisses!" He squealed for him and his legs almost gave out to die a death from joy.

The drive was pleasant; he had his husband next to him, the music up and his hand was tightly clasped in Jacob's as he leaned against the window and looked out. He would tell him later, but he was pretty sure this was the deepest headspace he'd been in their entire relationship.

For the moment, Adam felt his depression was cured. At least right now, when he had someone who needed and adored him feeding a side of him he used to be ashamed of.

Glancing over, he smirked to himself. Jacob had a habit of sucking on his bottom lip a little. Sometimes he'd catch him frustrated and would give him a bottle of milk or water to alleviate the urge to suckle.

Pulling into the parking lot, he added that to the list. "Okay, it should be pretty quick but promise not to get mad at Daddy."

Jacob cocked his head and glanced at the front of the store. "I like shopping with you."

But he didn't exactly know the story of what lie in the far back, only accessible to a certain community of people and hidden from the outside society.

People stared, either curious or judgmental but as a trans man Adam had long ago learned to cut out his perception of negativity. It was a smaller store so there weren't too many, but one lady up ahead was giving him a whole lot of hostile energy.

She smirked as she moved her cart out of the way. "Late in the day for pajamas."

Adam stopped and turned to her, ignoring the nervous pull of his arm from Jacob. "He's got cancer. I think he's allowed to wear what he likes in public."

Jacob would definitely remember that, but Adam hated judgmental assholes, especially when they couldn't keep their mouths shut. Let them feel guilty and fuck them was his philosophy.

The woman's eyes widened and she apologized profusely, but Adam didn't accept it. "Come on, Jack. I'm sorry you had to deal with that kind of ignorance."

Her face turned beet red and she walked away quickly, leaving them to find the back. Adam glanced around, pulled out a key and walked into a hallway. "Quit tugging, baby. We're allowed."

"Tosh! We're not supposed to go in the back of shops!" He protested quietly. "And you were lying to that Miss!"

"Adam! Welcome back!"

Adam turned and nodded his hello, then pulling Jacob closer. "Anthony, this is my Jack." He could feel himself practically glowing with pride, especially when Jacks hair was sitting so nice and how beautifully flushed he was. "Isn't he just perfect?"

Anthony smiled warmly and clasped his hands. "Oh my stars, he's precious! And that blanket is darling!" Then to a stunned Jacob, "We've heard so many wonderful things about you, kiddo! This is a safe place, so my lips are sealed." He winked and mimed zipping his lips shut before motioning them to follow.

Adam gaged Jacob's face and found him looking down at him. He could imagine he was completely baffled. "What's this, then?"

"A safe place."

He gasped softly when they entered the back room and pulled his blanket to his cheek. "Blimey, that's a shocker."

From wall to wall and floor to ceiling it was filled with Little gear. Diapers, bottles and sippy cups, pacifiers, bibs and adult sized toys and baby blankets spanned as far as the eye could see. Anthony sat at the desk with other employees chatting and caught them up. They all smiled when they saw Adam, and then bigger when they saw the man clinging to his hand.

Another guy and a bouncy blonde girl grinned at them both. "Hazel. It's nice to finally meet you Jack. Also, Adam, I'm not sure you've met my Little." Hazel proudly presented her and chuckled at her seemingly unending energy. "This is my Anna."

She beamed at them like a little sun. "It's so nice to meet you! I get to work here now with my Daddy and I'm so excited!"

Hazel laughed and patted her head. "Calm down, sweetie. You're going to burn yourself out."

She pouted a little but waved at Jacob animatedly, who waved back in bewilderment with a confused blush. He scooted closer to Adam and tucked his head into his neck.

Adam smiled at him lovingly. "He's shy. I didn't exactly tell him where I was getting everything." He pulled out his wallet and snorted when he felt an annoyed huff. "But now we need more."

Anthony shook his head in amusement. "I swear to god I spend every cent of my paychecks on my Little boy all the damn time. He's too cute, I can't help it."

"And that's why Token is spoiled," Anna giggled, looking up at Hazel as he tossed her a look. "I'm spoiled too, Daddy! I'm allowed to say it!"

"It's a caregivers curse," Adam sighed. "Hazel, we need a high chair before anything else." Jacob scoffed and protested but Adam glancing at him was enough to get him to shut his mouth. "Because this one gets into shit and won't stay in a chair."

Anthony walked off and Hazel typed it up on inventory. "Have you tried footies?"

"Actually no, but he's also got a thing with fiddling with stuff and if he's pissy about it enough he'll just take them off." He brushed his hair away from his eyes and Jacob gave him a surprised look. "He likes to screw around with the diaper straps too but he's just curious."

Jacob reached up a hand to brush his fingers under the unobscured periwinkle eyes now looking back at him full of amusement and humor. "Your eyes..."

"Safe place with safe people," Adam reiterated gently. "Speaking of pissy, we need new diapers."

A tall, dark haired woman walked in from the back just as he spoke and gasped when she saw them. "Oh my stars, I thought I heard your voice!" Her eyes went to Jacob and she pointed an endlessly black, sharp acrylic at him. "Adam is this him?!"

Adam grinned and stood a bit straighter. "Sabine, this is my Little."

She beamed and ran to hug them both, Adam making a face but returning it.

Anthony sighed humorously. "You know he hates hugs, Mommy Sabine."

"She's fine," He assured. "Jack, can you say hi?"

He smiled a little, warming up to the environment. "'Ello, Sabine."

Adam had a great deal of respect and admiration for Sabine, her formal title being Mommy Sabine but he would truly rather drop dead than address her as such. She was the one who had opened the shop, the one who named it and the one who made a lot of the clothes and accessories. She was a tall, vastly gothic woman with pale skin like his. Sabine kind of reminded him of Morticia from the Addams Family. She could've easily been his cousin or something too, even with her brown eyes.

They widened and she placed a dramatic hand over her chest. "Oh, he's just adorable!And he's British!"

Adam chuckled. "You should've heard what he said yesterday. We speak the same language basically but sometimes I can't understand a word he says."

Jacob giggled as Adam wrapped a protective arm around his waist to let him know he was doing a good job. "You understand sometimes."

"'Sometimes' being the key word." Adam kissed his cheek and he blushed fiercely, gaining more than a few soft proclamations of how cute he was from the employees.

Adam had rarely felt more proud.

Sabine led them around personally, rambling on about new additions to come while Adam picked up a few more things for Jacob that made him turn an ungodly shade of red.

"Is this the punish—?"

"This is the punishment, yes," Adam confirmed immediately. "But the definition is slightly askew because this is making me very happy." It was so evident in his voice it startled both of them, and it seemed as if Jack was taking it in stride after that.

They checked out and were immediately met with a problem: how were they going to get this all stuff through the store without raising suspicions? Yes it had opened lowkey and yes it was run by a community of people that Adam was apart of and now his Jack, but customers would whisper and wonder what aisle exactly he'd gotten the big stuff from. The bags were black but they couldn't fit the high chair in a bag, Adam had to shoulder it.

Jacob shuffled his feet as the team thought of a solution and Adam glanced up at him when he tugged on his arm. "How do you get out of here normally?"

"Normally I don't pick up this much stuff, and nothing this big either. I can usually walk out once I'm cleared..." Adam sighed, lamenting his unusually poor planning skills. Underneath the necessity, he must have been excited to show Jacob Little World Of Wonders and that he wasn't alone or a freak.

Anna gasped sharply. "Why don't we use the back door?"

Hazel and Anthony face palmed. "Jesus Christ, what an easy option."

Hazel picked up Anna and placed her on his hip. "Good job, baby! I'm so proud of you!"

Adam took Jacob out and left most things in the bags, but brought one to help relax him.

Upon buckling his seatbelt he broke into it and Jacob gave him a nasty look that was dampened by his Little Space. "You're out of your fu—,"

Adam pushed the pacifier in and held it until he started sucking passive aggressively. The longer he held it, the more Jacob relaxed. "I fail to understand how you think I don't know what you need." Adam kissed his forehead and smirked. "You're so cute with your paci."

On the way home, Jacob passed out snoring and Adam pulled out his phone to snap a picture every time he got a chance. His blanket was tucked up to his face and the pacifier was still in his mouth. He looked so sweet, but tired. The trip really only took an hour total but he supposed it was nap time so he grabbed the diapers and hauled him out to lay down and cuddle up next to.

But his excitement wouldn't leave him alone.

One of the most fascinating things about the ABDL community was that they were incredibly crafty. Putting the high chair together was pretty easy, and it was foldable to put back in their room closet where no one would happen to find it if they were looking for a broom or mop.

He stood back and felt an odd sense of lucidity. This was his life, though not all the time, and he loved it deeply. To think he'd wanted to kill himself, survived death and managed to then immediately find Jacob made the normally aloof man want to cheer and sing about it.

An idea came to him and he felt a surge of energy encouraging him on. This was easy, he knew how to make them and Jack would be asleep at least long enough to mix the ingredients and preheat the oven.

Being British, Jacob was a man of refined manner and class for the most part. He minded his P's and Q's, he was a gentleman to no end and preferred tea to coffee. His cockney roots inspired Adam all the damn time, he could sit and listen to him describe London and its wonders for eons and still ask for more. He'd love to take him, but the fear that it would trigger him kept his mouth shut on the matter.

He heard shuffling behind him and found Jacob staring in wonder. "How are you?"

Adam smiled. "I'm peachy, baby. How was your nap?"

"No, I meant what are you doing?" He giggled, coming closer and eyeing the oven carefully. He knew ovens were hot! Adam had told him many, many times to be very careful around them. "What are you making?"

Adam couched to hold his hips and tilted his head. "A British delicacy you used to complain about not having."

Jacob brightened and gasped a happy little sound. "Daddy, what 'tis it?!"

"Crumpets." He stood and ruffled his hair as he bounced in place and stopped him from sticking a finger into the batter. "Stop it! You're going to make yourself sick, Jacob!"

He stomped his foot and Adam raised his brows, surprised by the show of frustration. It was genuinely a shock. When was the last time Jacob had been so bratty? Perhaps he was spoiling him too much. He didn't seem hungover anymore though, and he'd dismiss the excuse if he tried to use it.

They had a staring contest until he just pulled him into a hug. "Now, I know you didn't just stomp your foot at me, Little Boy. That's a really good way to get a spanking."

Jacob grumbled but sighed. "I apologize."

It was as simple as that. He comforted him and told him he'd get them as soon as they were cooled, 30 minutes or so with frequent checking. His smile returned and Adam checked his diaper again before sending him off to watch cartoons and snuggle with his blanket.

By the time they were pulled out the kitchen had started to smell like honey and bread, giving a homey feel to their house that made Adam cheerful as he went to dig into what he'd gotten Jacob. He'd purchased a mystery box, knowing what lie inside from his last time and sat next to Jacob. "Whatcha watchin'?"

He shifted around to lean against him heavily like the clingy little baby he was. "TAWOG."

"Unironically that show is hilarious," Adam told him with a playful nudge. "Daddy got you something."

He lifted to look down at the box. "Alright?"

Unsheathing it, Adam watched Jacob's face. "It's a busy box, for Little Boys who won't leave the remotes alone and press buttons on the washers and DVD players."

It was actually pretty cool. On it were about 40 switches, 20 buttons, ten on and off knobs and three dials. Each lit up with one of the colors of the rainbow when turned on or moved to a different position, and the dials turned with cheerful clicks that would definitely help distract his ADHD. Adam would have to deal with the sound, he'd do anything for his Jack. "Do you wanna play with it while your snacks cool? Carbohydrates will knock out the rest of your hangover, then it's bath time and bedtime."

He watched as Jack flipped a single switch and smiled. It lit up green and he looked to Adam for reassurance. "What color is that?"

"Green!" He flipped four more then climbed into sit hard on Adam's lap, clearly trapping him on purpose. Pressing a cheek to his lips, Jacob actually started to play with it. He turned all of them off and started flipping on ones with the same colors, green, then switching to the next one he wanted, purple. "Violet."

"Purple," Adam corrected teasingly.

Jacob leaned up to give him a frown. "No, it's not. That's pants, this is violet. It's in the rainbow."

Adam rolled his eyes and sighed. "Fine. You got me. Did you know that's my second favorite color?"

He nodded. "That's why I did it!"

He laughed and pressed another one for him. "What's this color?"

Jacob was silent for so long Adam had to smile. "Blue..."

Before Jacob could look for encouragement Adam whisked him into his arms and dipped him in affection and pride. "Oh my stars, look at how smart you are! My little boy is so smart, it's gonna make all of the other Mommies and Daddies jealous!"

Jack squealed and nuzzled into his neck before pulling away and covering his face. "Daddy, I'm not a baby."

"Yes, you are!" Adam whined rather dramatically. "You're my baby! My sweet Little who likes buttons and milk and crumpets! I love my baby boy, Daddy just wants to watch him be cute forever and ever."

The most incredible thing happened: Jacob got overwhelmed and hyper stimulated from all of the attention he'd been lacking while Adam worked himself into the ground. He put both hands on either side of Adam's face and pressed his lips to his eagerly, complete with the animated and undyingly adorable, "Muah!"

Adam put a hand over his heart and choked out a wheeze. "You're gonna kill Daddy from how precious you are, baby. Daddy loves your kisses and you're such a good little boy."

His phone buzzed and Jack dove for it with a mischievous giggle. He stared at it for a moment and Adam snatched it back, patting his bottom as he read the message.

Hazel: It was so nice to meet your Little, he's such a cutie! Anna says she'd love a playdate sometime, we're free all week or can make plans later on!

Adam beamed and Jacob tilted his head, poking it over the top of the phone. "What's that?"

"You wanna have a playdate?" Adam whispered, tilting his head up with stars in his eyes. "Daddy thinks it would be good for you to have Little friends, so you don't feel so guilty about it. Maybe we need more friends in general, good friends who don't want to hurt us."

And his Jack leaned forward to nuzzle his nose against his. "Okay, Daddy."