We're here for over one month and it's March. I like March. The flowers that begin to grow in its beautiful colors. The trees with its light green leaves and the smell of fresh air. Everything is starting to grow and after a sleepy winter the nature wakes up.
Isn't this the most beautiful time in the year?
When you're standing outside and you can feel yourself being a part of all of this.
Wonderful, right?

The only thing that I'm not happy about is that I'm just sitting outside because we have P.E.
So I'm trying to distract myself with the leaves rustling in the trees.

"Foss, are you even listening to me?", the couch asked making me flinch to Spencer next to me.
Right, I already forgot that I'm Foss instead of Ross in P.E.

"I am listening, sir", I lied because I don't even know which topic we are on.

"Then what did I talk about?", he asked taking one step closer to me making himself bigger.

"Uhm-", I looked behind him trying to find a hint like a football or something like that, "sports?"

The rest of the class laughed at my answer and even I tried to hide a smile.

"Ah, your funny, right? Detention after class!", he demanded walking away from me.

I tried to resist the urge to roll my eyes but failed when he turned around. Detention? Really? I just didn't listen cause I was distracted by the nature? I have to admit that this happens nearly every lesson but the couch didn't seem to care until today.

"I was talking, and I hope everyone is listening now or you wanna join detention with Foss, about Basketball, our new topic", the coach explained while looking at me with a glare.
Shouldn't I look at him like that, he still doesn't get my name right.

Basketball. Our new topic.

It isn't that bad because I'm quiet tall. I'm not that muscular than other guys in this class but basketball, I have to admit, isn't that bad. I just can't dribble for too long. I always lose the ball and when I try to catch it again I just end up falling on the floor. I don't really wanna blame myself in front of the class. So maybe Basketball isn't that good at all.

"There will be two teams playing against each other. The teams will be chosen by.... Anderson... and.... Urie, come on guys choose your team."

I saw a few guys tapping 'Anderson' on the shoulder and head them saying he would be the winner not the 'fag'. Their words.
It were the same boys that called Brendon a fag once in P.E.
My hand instantly became to a fist and I just closed my eyes to calm down. I don't know why but it just makes me angry just hearing the word fag.

To distract myself I looked over to brendon who seemed to be a little bit tensed. Today he wore a blue t-shirt which suited hin well. It wasn't that loose and I could see his body tenses up when Anderson went next to him giving him an amused look. I couldn't hear it but he whispered something in Brendons ear making the other guys laugh and yell.

Brendon just looked more uncomfortable in his skin than before. I could tell by his behavior. It was like the day we drove to his house and he just couldn't sit still on his seat. Now he also was nearly jumping out of his skin out of nervousness.

His eyes searched for something and when he met mine he just stopped tapping his foot against the ground. He looked me straight in the eyes like it meant something. I know that sounds stupid but it seemed like we both forgot we were in P.E. right now.

This feeling didn't last for long. The coach whistled and Brendon looked immediately away.

I was a little bit disappointed that the eye contact didn't last longer but I just sat up straighter paying attention to the ground and the little ants crawling over it. It seemed to be the best distraction I could find not risking any kind of looking at Brendon right now.

"What are you waiting for? Choose your team!", the coach yelled making my head finally go up to see Anderson and Brendon in front of the class. Brendon obviously seemed to be nervous again but not that bad. Anderson just smiled and boy he had a pretty smile. The most girls are having a crush on him I found out. I really can't blame them. He looks pretty, but that's it. Nothing special in his face that you will remember. Maybe his blonde hair that sits perfectly but you will find this guy on every school. But Brendon not. You couldn't find someone like him again.

Stop thinking like that.

"Allington", Anderson said pointing at the guy next to Spencer he obviously belongs to his friends.
Allington, who's actually name is Jaden, was quiet good in P.E. He was muscular and athletic but, I'm sorry, dumb. I once had to do a partner work with him and I just ended up doing everything on my own. But his knowledge of the stuff we learn and learned in school is so small it's hilarious.

I'm not being rude, just honest.

"Jon", Brendon said looking at all of us like it was hard for him to choose.

Anderson smiled and Jaden whispered something in his ear making Anderson shake his head without his smile dissappearing, leaving Jaden with a confused face.

"Ross."

At first I didn't realise he meant me but his eyes locked with mine.

"C'mon, boy, we don't have time to wait for you", the coach said.

I stood up walking over to Anderson who held his hand up wanting me to clap in his hand. At first I stopped wanting to refuse but the look he gave me kinda scared me. It was a look that tells somebody it would be a good decision to follow the orders otherwise you won't like the consequents. It's just a hand clap, I know, but it means something like being with the other person or liking what that person did. In that case belonging to his team.

I gulped and clapped in making the boys smile and yell before man-hugging me. I didn't want to see the look on brendons face. Maybe he was disappointed I clapped in or he thinks I'm on theirs and not on his side.

I risked a look anyway finding him looking neutral at the last boys sitting on the bench. Nothing on his face looked like sadness or disappointment. He just went on like he did before and I have to admit that I would have liked it more if he showed any emotion on his face. But nothing changed.

I mean, it's not like he has to. I don't even know if we are friends. So why do I even think of something like that?

Just focus on Basketball for now.

*****

At least I had Frank in my team. But that's it. The other guys were all in Brendons team.

"Are you good in basketball?", Frank asked looking focused on the ball that Anderson dribbled.

"Not really", I said.

"At least you are taller than most of us."

"But that means nothing when you don't have any muscles", I answered chuckling.

"True."

Oh no. Tyler had the ball now and was dribbling in our direction. Right to us. I can't just run away now! I have to stop him right? Or was that in football? Fuck, I don't know.
I looked nervously to Frank who just slowly went away.

Really?

He just leaves me alone? Great. I prepared myself to take the ball away from him but before I could do anything he threw the ball to Brendon who stood on the other side.

He clearly tried to focus on the game and his t-shirt glued on his skin and ramed every curve of it perfectly. His hair was a little bit messy and a streak of hair fell on his face and it waked the urge in me to put it back. He dribbled the ball and looked around if somebody Is going to take it. Then he focused on the basket and bite his lip out of concentration. His muscles tensed when he jumped up wanting to trow the ball in the basket. His shirt lifted up exposing a little bit skin.
I could watch him all-

Outch.

I tumbled back trying not to fall. I saw Brendon looking at me with wide eyes and an open mouth.
I trapped over my feed and landed in somebody's arms. Probably Franks because he stood right behind me.
My head hurts. What did just happen?
I saw the ball rolling right in front of me and I just sighed. I got hit by the ball.

Fantastic.

I was so focused on Brendon that I didn't see the ball coming right in my direction from Brendon! I watched him! Why didn't I see the ball?

"You ok, man?", Frank asked and I just nod not wanting to speak right now. But my head hurts really, he hit me bad.

Frank helped me to stand up on my feed when I heard the coach whistle.

"Stop! Take a break guys, we will play in a few minutes!", he yelled while walking over to me.

"Uhm, you should go to the nurse, that doesn't seem to be a bad injury but just to be sure. But is everything alright? I mean you still can see everything and stand up right?", he asked looking at my head for some bad injuries.

"Oh god! I'm so sorry, Ryan! I didn't see you! I just- I'm sorry!", Brendon rambled when he ran to me.

His eyes were wide and full of worry. I probably looked like an idiot starring at Brendon before getting hit with a ball by him.
He obviously didn't know what to do, because he just stood there awkwardly probably unsure of what to say.

"You, Urie, go with Foss to the nurse, just to be sure you don't have a concussion or something like that", the coach said leaving us alone.

"Maybe we should have chosen the Fag instead of the boy who couldn't see the ball right in front of his face", Anderson hissed bumping in my shoulder while walking away.

Brendon just stood next to me looking at the ground. He looked ashamed for some reason but shouldn't I be the ashamed one? I was starring at him. I got hit by the ball.

"Hey, you ok?", Spencer asked me from behind having the rest of the guys next to him.

"Yeah, just have to visit the nurse for a check up, nothing serious", I answered.

"Ok, just be careful not that somebody throws a ball at you", he said chuckling.

"I will."Even I had to smile, because it reminded me of my 'old' school where we once we're on the playground to play soccer. The ball hit me two times by Aiden, one of my old friends. After middle school we barely had something to do with each other so we lost us in time. It's sad that you will lose the most of your friends after a long time. First you swear to each other you will see them and be friends forever. But everybody moves on. That may be sad but it's true. I'm happy I still have Spencer, who I know since elementary school and Susan, who is related to me.
I know Cristina since middle school, but she hated me at first. I don't know why. But then we just came along with each other after the time and I'm so happy she decided not to hate me anymore because she belongs to the most important people in my whole life.

I turned to Brendon telling him to go to the nurse with me because I really don't wanna risk having a concussion. I probably would have noticed it but who knows? I'm not a doctor.

We just went silently next to each other to the nurse.

"Uhm, I'm probably going to hate myself after I ask this... but", Brendon began after a while.
I turned to him and stopped going. He scratched his neck avoiding any eye contact.

"Can we... go? I feel less nervous when I do something and walking would be great", he asked finally looking up to me but immediately turning away.

"Sure", I said,"was that the question?" I chuckled.

"No", he said but I saw a little smile on his face that waked the urge in me to stare at him like in P.E.

"I... uhm... you were staring at me for like five minutes in sport before I.... you know... again, sorry for that."

I gulped. Five minutes? It felt like seconds. Damn, that's embarrassing.

"And my question is", he began, "...why?"

I really wanted to stop walking or run away. Running away would be a good idea. But I can't. I have to stay here and answer. I mean I could just ignore that question but that would be rude, wouldn't it?

"I just.... stared... I often zone out. You said that by yourself", I answered trying to sound calm but I could hear my voice going higher.

"Oh... er, yeah, sure. You often zone out. I just thought you stared at .... nevermind, we're here", he said opening the room room to the nurse room holding it open for me.

What was he thinking? Did he think I stared at him? I mean that's what happened but was that the answer he wanted to hear? That I couldn't take my eyes of him?
This thought made my cheeks go slightly red.

We found a nurse in the room chewing gum. She tapped her way to long fingers against the table making unpleasant noises.

"The cooling packs are in the fridge on your left. Bring them after school back to us", she simply said not looking away from her laptop.

I turned to Brendon who just narrowed his eyes.

"Can you please check if he has a concussion or something serious?", Brendon asked quietly.

The nurse finally looked up rising her eyebrows.

"What happened?", she asked now putting her eyes on me.

"I got hit by a ball", I simply said pressing my lips together after I ended the sentence.

"Look, like I said the cooling packs are in the fridge. Just take one", she said looking at her computer again.

"Shouldn't you look if he got some serious injuries?", Brendon asked louder now.

"Can you stand? Can you jump? Can you see? Is it difficult for you to walk straight?", she asked me.

"What?"

"Ugh, do you have any problems after you got hit?", she asked probably annoyed by us but she finally stood up.

"No, just a headache."

She walked over to me not saying anything.

"Sit down", she said pointing at the couch that stood on the left of the room.

I did as she said. I looked over to brendon sho just stood there next to the door not really knowing what to do.
I had to smile because I find it amusing, but the smile faded when the nurse came back telling me to look into a lightning pen she had. I followed all her instructions still not saying anything. I think it was kinda awkward just sitting there not really feeling welcome. Of course, this is the nurse room but still she was so unfriendly that I hoped it would be over soon.

"You don't have a concussion, I can guarantee you. It was a hard hit but you don't have any serious injuries", she simply said, "you can go now."

"Thanks", I whispered standing up before going to brendon who just looked at the clock ticking. But before we could go out of the room she gave me the cooling pack, for my headaches, she said.

The nurse sat down on the table again chewing her gum. I never saw such a demotivated person in my life before.

"Damn, she was kinda rude, right?", Brendon said when we closed the door behind us.

"Yeah, she was."

We slowly walked back to P.E., but before we got there Brendon gripped my wrist and pulled me to him. What was he doing? My breathing sped up when I was so near to him. He also looked surprised when he saw me standing so near to him. Our chests nearly touched but I wish they did. His plump lips were so close to me and I wished I could close my eyes and move forward to-

"The coach thinks we're at the nurse room. So we can chill out here a little bit if you want to. I don't really wanna play basketball", he said pulling myself out of my thoughts. I just realised that did move a little bit closer so I took a step back scratching my neck nervously.

"Yeah... you're right", I mumbled focusing my eyes on the ground.

"Then... should we go to the cafeteria? Eat something?", he asked.
I really could eat something right now.

I nod so we walked to the cafeteria and ordered two chocolate muffins. Should I pay for them? I mean it's not a date, right? Or does he think that? No, I don't think so. But I also paid when I ate something with breezy and even if she thought it was a date I didn't think so. So it would be ok if I pay.

I thought about it that I didn't realise that Brendon already paid for us.

"Here", je simply said holding the muffin in front of me.

I took it and we sat down on a table next to the window where we used to sit with the rest of the group.

"Do you wanna play 20 questions?", he asked.

"Sure."

He smiled and narrowed his eyes like he thought of a good question.

"What's your favourite movie?", he asked.

"Uhm... Harry potter."

"I meant movie... not book", he said laughing.
Oh, right. I forgot that the first harry potter movie wasn't even out in 2000, "but I heard that there going to make a film about the first book that will be released next year."

I had to think of a movie that is a little bit older than harry potter.

"Back to the future." I couldn't think of a better one but I really liked this movie anyway so it wasn't exactly a lie. Funny how this movie actually fits for my situation now.

He nod and took a bit of his muffin.
"Itsh yo turn", he mumbled with a full mouth.

"What's your zodiac sign?", I asked.

"I don't know to be honest", he said scratching his neck.

"Really? When's your birthday?"

"12. April."

"Then your an Aries."

"Is that a good sign?", he asked.

"Is think so, Aries are really impulsive and powerful. But they also can be aggressive. They need their freedom but people around themselves, because they can't be alone for too long", I explained. I always liked the zodiac Aries, because it was always positive and impulsive. Someone you would like to have by yourself.

"Wow. That's pretty cool. What's your zodiac sign?", he said with an impressed kook on his face.
The Aries suited him.

"Virgo. It's stands for purity, organisation and wisdom."

"That's also cool. Now its my turn! Sooo... what was your old school called?"

I opened my mouth to say it but I stopped. I didn't know it. I forgot it. What was my old school called? I couldn't have forgotten it, right?
It all seemed to fade, my memories, so simple things like my school. It all seemed to be so far away.

"I don't know", I whispered barely hear able

"What?"

"I- I think we should go now, maybe the coach already worries about us."

"Uhm... Ok", he said confused.

I really didn't feel like talking right now, because I didn't know what was happening. Why can't I remember the name of my damn school?
I just went to P.E taking long steps leaving Brendon behind. He followed me but I was still faster.

I have to find Spencer.

*****

Yeah I know the descriptions of the zodiac signs isn't that accurate, but I didn't want to write too much about it ; )

What's your zodiac sign?

I'm an Aries 〜(^∇^〜）

And please check out my new story! It's a short chaptered one but I try to upload every day.
It's called:

Stutter~Ryden

♡