[gigil  - filipino in origin. defined as the urge to pinch or squeeze someone's/something's cheeks when they are so unbelievably cute/adorable.]

She woke up to the sound of someone retching. She opened her eyes to partial darkness – something soft was blocking her view. She dragged her finger over it, fascinated by how soft it was.

"Quit it! I'm trying to sleep."

Vera shot up, accidentally pushing Blaire out of the makeshift sofa bed and onto the floor. Blaire landed on the floor with a less-than-graceful thump, accompanied with a string of expletives. Vera peered over the edge to see Blaire's black sleeping mask on the floor and with one sock on, and the other far away from her.

"Sor-" Vera started to say but was interrupted by Blaire's finger on her lips. Her words were muffled behind them.

"Shhh..." Blaire mumbled, through her yawn. "Wake me up when it's three."

Vera nodded, even though she knew Blaire was drifting to sleep. She removed the blanket from the bed and covered her with it, knowing that Blaire would lay there until it was three and she didn't want her to get cold.

Her friends were not morning people. Vera had an inkling of this, but the scene before her only confirmed it. Her living room looked beyond messy – it looked like a petulant teenager had run rampant in her room after being told no. Her blankets lay scattered on the floor, resembling a badly organised game of don't-touch-the-floor. There were food packets on the floor, and half-empty mugs of drinks she didn't remember having.

She manoeuvred her way through the sleeping bodies on the floor and made her way to the bathroom. The retching had paused, but continued as soon as Vera's hand was on the doorknob. She hesitated, and knocked instead.

A loud heaving noise interrupted Vera's train of thought. She wasn't paying attention to who was missing from the maze of bodies on the floor but now, it made sense.

"Mel?" She asked with concern.

A wave of déjà vu overcame her. She had been in this position before; the stench of vomit at the club was far more pungent than she wanted to remember. In her drunken haze, she remembered walking towards the sound of the noise. Mel's heels blocked the gap between the floor and the bottom of the door, and Vera knocked on the door. No answer. She remembered that she steadied herself by leaning on the edge of the cubicle door, waiting for her friend's heaving to stop.

"Mel?" She asked again.

She was here now. She shook her head free from the memory. The gagging had stopped and had been replaced with Melissa's tired breath.

"You're out of toilet paper." She muttered.

Vera could hear Melissa's grunts of exhaustion as the toilet flushed. The door creaked open, and Vera slipped in between the opened gap. Melissa sat on the floor, her legs outstretched and her arm leaning on the rim of the toilet. Her glasses sat discarded on the floor, with splashes of (what Vera hoped was) water trickling down the frame.

Vera stood on her tiptoes and reached for the top cabinet, grunting as she pulled down the toilet roll. She passed it to Melissa, who grabbed at it gratefully and dabbed at her face and her clothing. Vera watched as her fingers moved quickly across the hem of her torn top, her skin falling out of the holes.

"Got you covered." Vera murmured.

She crouched on the floor, the tiled floor sent shivers up her leg. She looked to the window, realising that it was wide open and the morning's sun shone its light directly on the back of Melissa's head.

"It's always you." Melissa began.

Vera tilted her head in confusion, not sure where she was going with this.

Melissa laughed. Vera couldn't tell whether her laugh was intentionally empty or whether she was just tired. It was probably a bit of both.

"I've only ever been a mess in front of you." Melissa looked down, lightly dragging her finger down the middle of tile. "You're the only one who's seen me at my worst."

The pause hung heavy and uncomfortably in the air and Vera hoped it wouldn't last too long. She didn't know whether the pause would last long enough for her to interject.

Melissa started to talk again, her voice was much quieter and resembled more of a whisper. "Thank you for keeping this side of me quiet."

Melissa looked up, her eyes glassy and overflowing with tears that hesitated to drop. Vera didn't say anything, she didn't need to, she just wrapped her arms around her friend and rocked her. She wanted to absorb all of Melissa's sadness but she knew that sadness doesn't work like that. Sadness had to be slowly squeezed out, and Melissa's sadness was the type to be the most stubborn in disappearing altogether. Her sadness would leave in trickles, like tears running down her cheeks, and her body would cry out all of the sadness until there was no more.

"You're out of drugs, by the way." Melissa mumbled into her shoulder.

Vera held at her at arm's length and narrowed her eyebrows. Drugs? What did she mean by that? Melissa waved the empty, very clearly empty, ibuprofen packet in front of her face and smirked at her. The classic did-you-think-I-meant-something-else expression was written on her face and Vera was so glad that her skin was dark as the blush probably would've spread to her arms.

"I'll get some." Vera got up, her knees clicking as she did so. "I'll go check what the others need too."

Melissa nodded. "I'll look after the castle."

Vera grinned. "Call me if any monsters appear."

*

Vera was dressed in her slummiest outfit. Her grey sweats hung loosely on her hips, and her hair was tied into a wild make-shift bun. Her brown skin was covered by her old, tattered hoodie with a large hole in the side. Her face was bare for the entire world to scrutinise. The bags under her eyes didn't seem so dark in her bedroom mirror but the quick glimpse of her face in the pharmacist's window said otherwise. She hiked her hoodie to cover part of her face, hoping that she wouldn't see anyone familiar.

She opened the door, not expecting the sound of the metal chimes. Another familiar student rushed past her, almost causing her to fall over. A muttered apology was thrown at her before becoming lost in the wind.

Once she was inside, safely away from rushing pedestrians, she glanced at her phone to see what she needed. Medicine and plasters, and probably gum. The entire world seemed to have populated this very tiny shop. So much for not wanting anyone to see me. She bobbed and weaved around people, apologising when she accidentally stumbled on an elderly woman's cane, until she got to the right section. She crouched down, balancing herself on her knees, and peered at the labels. She couldn't understand why one brand of paracetamol was way cheaper than the other and why the cheaper brand was always sold out.

"If you reach in the back, the cheaper ones are usually behind another brand." A male voice made her jump, and lose her balance.

She ended up on the floor, resembling a fallen toddler on the ground. Her make-shift bun fell apart and it was at that point that Vera decided that she was going to give up with life.

"Oops, didn't mean to scare you." His words were enunciated clearly, and his accent reminded her of posh, private-schooled boys. Except that his nose was stuffy. Extremely stuffy.

A pale and freckled hand appeared in front of her. She looked at it for a minute, not knowing what to do with it. Oh! She placed her hand in his, and smiled sheepishly once he had pulled her up.

"Sorry about that." He paused, turning away to cough then he turned back to her. "I've seen you somewhere before. Aren't you Blaire's friend?"

Vera's voice got caught in her throat. She looked at him, trying to place his features in someone familiar. His ginger beard should've turned on the light switch in her brain but the light remained off.

Before Vera could open her mouth, he snatched the answers from her brain. He looked sheepish as he scratched his neck. "You don't know who I am, do you? Oh gosh. Sorry, I didn't mean to startle you. You probably think I'm an idiot who hits on girls in a pharmacy, of all places. Not that I was hitting on you. Not that I wouldn't hit on you. Not that I don't think you're attractive, because I do, unless you want me to hit on you? Why am I even asking you that? Of course, you don't. I'm so sorry about this. I'll just leave you now."

Vera only managed to catch onto the end of his sentence. He started to walk away and she noticed the blush creeping onto the back of his neck. Vera almost wanted to giggle, but she kept it in.

"Wait, how do you know Blaire?" She called out when he was at the end of the aisle.

He turned around so violently that he accidentally knocked over the sunglasses stand next to him. It was a sunglass tower. It was like a car crash – Vera could only stop to watch the scene in front of her. Everything was in slow motion – his face morphed from 'oh shit' to 'I accept my fate'; the sunglasses hit the ground one by one, then suddenly gaining in speed; one pair of glasses smacked him in the face; the employee fell to his knees, mourning the loss of his efforts. The entire scene was comical.

Too comical for the silence that filled the shop afterwards. Vera bit her lip in a bid to stop laughing. It didn't help. A stray, ugly giggle left her lips. Everyone turned to her as she immediately covered her mouth with her hands. The employee, still on the floor, glared angrily in her direction. As much as she wanted to turn away and act like nothing had happened, she felt a pang of guilt. She was partly responsible after all.

She walked over to him and started to pick up the glasses from the floor. The ginger guy followed her lead, smiling whenever he caught her eye, and picked up the stand. There was a cut on his face, where the pair of glasses had smacked him in the face. She grabbed the conveniently placed box of plasters and ripped it open, much to the employee's disapproval.

"Don't worry, I'll buy it." She flashed him a smile, hoping that he'll accept it as an apology.

The employee grunted in response before disappearing through the backdoors. Her aisle was empty, apart from the sunglasses that had somehow managed to make its way to very end of the shop.

She passed him a plaster and returned to placing the sunglasses back on the stand. The shop gradually returned back to its quiet bustle. People avoided their aisle, only excusing themselves politely as they manoeuvred themselves around them.

"I'm sorry about this."

Vera smiled. "It's fine."

An awkward silence sat heavy between them. She was sure that she could hear all the words he wanted to say but they never made it out. She was never good with awkward silences.

"So, how do you know Blaire?"

"We took part in the bootcamp tournament last year. Actually, we won."

Vera stood up a bit too quickly. She watched as the miniscule shapes dance around her vision before disappearing. She knew him. She remembered cheering wildly for Blaire as she accepted her trophy. She remembered seeing a white guy with brown hair accompany her as she walked across the stage. She remembered what her exact thoughts were too.

"You look different." The words just fell out of her mouth.

"For the better? Actually, no, wait. Don't answer that." He dropped the glasses onto the floor, hearing the hard crack on the floor. "Oh shit. I'll pay for that. I promise. I'm into broken lenses, new trend." He apologised to the employee who just walked through the door.

He said to her, "Yeah, I used to dye my hair to try to escape this fiery mess." He chuckled dryly.

"I like your hair." Vera said, crouching on the floor to reach under the shelf.

"Oh really? You do? Are you sur- I mean, it's only a mess sometimes. Only today. No wait, that's a lie. I'm lying to you. Don't listen to me. I'm talking shit. I'm going to shut up now."

She wanted to laugh at the sound of him flustering. She found it strangely attractive, seeing as she was usually the one tripping over her words. She picked up the last pair of glasses and placed them on the stand. Her knees were never going to forgive her.

"Again, I'm really sorry about this."

He must've seen the look of pain on her face. She quickly smiled, despite feeling the tiny ache I her legs with each step she took to the counter.

"Oh, no, it's okay."

She looked down at her phone as she waited in line. She grimaced at the dozen missed calls and the texts filled with expletives from her friends. She smiled apologetically once she was at the front of the queue. The bored employee smiled back before returning to her blunt expression. Vera looked at the gum on the side and added that to her stuff.

"Hey, I'm gonna go out on a limb and you can totally say no if you want." He was beside her now, also paying for his broken glasses. "I mean, it'd hurt if you said no but at least it won't be a pity date right? Oh no, I haven't even asked you-"

The woman behind the checkout held a hand up and turned to Vera. She said, "Look lady, can you just go on a date with the poor boy before we have to listen to his bullshit again?"

"Uh, sure, I guess."

The woman snatched the phone out of his hands and tossed it at Vera. Vera stood mortified in front of the counter as she struggled to put her number into his phone. When she passed it back to him, a light applause and the rustle of bags followed. She smiled, only because she didn't know what else to do.

"By the way, my name's William. But you can call me Will. Or whatever you want."

Good thing he's cute, Vera thought to herself as she thanked the cashier and gathered her bags.

He walked her out, ignoring the affectionate murmurs directed their way. Like the perfect gentleman, he opened the door for her and waited for her to walk out. Once they were away from the constant glances and whispers, he shoved both of his hands in his pocket and kicked the rocks down the pavement.

He cleared his throat. "I can delete your number if you want. I don't want you to feel like you have to attend this date just because I dragged you into this embarrassing tale I call my life."

Vera stopped walking. She watched him carry on walking before abruptly stopping when he realised that she wasn't by his side anymore.

"I'm going on this date because I want to and mostly because I think you're kinda cute."

She giggled behind her hand as she watched the blush creep from behind his beard to the top of his cheeks.

"Only kinda? I mean, I'll accept the kinda. I think it's probably the best I'm gonna get, I'm a solid five-out-of-ten and you're a ten-out-of-ten. Oh no, I'm doing the rambling thing again, aren't I?" He laughed, more at himself than anything else.

Vera's phone jingled before she could reply. She glanced at the notifications. 40 missed messages.

lilac princess: so, you're gonna need a new bucket because amreen just...

"Is something wrong?" Will asked, walking towards her.

Vera waved him off. "There's no problem."

Another text.

spring queen: fr vera. the dragon is awake and bleeding everywhere. come home asap x

She widened her eyes. She prayed with all her heart that her white rug hadn't been claimed as a victim to the war at home.

"I gotta go." Vera said as her phone jingled with yet another message from Rani.

Will made a little 'oh' shape with his mouth, and seemed a little disappointed. His frown quickly morphed into a smile as he waved her goodbye.

"Text me!" Vera called out, before turning around to walk away.

She was too far away to hear his reply, but she imagined that it was something cute and in a long, elaborate sentence. She wondered how it was possible for her heart to heal so quickly, only a day after she had felt its damage. The events of yesterday only caused a dull ache in her gut. Maybe Leon wasn't the one, or maybe it wasn't meant to be. Either way, Vera was strangely excited for her date with Will.

Now, she just had to face the hell that was happening in her home.