ANAIS

"Niccolo Xavier Lavigne." I heard Cookie's name being called out.

"That's my son!" Coco excitedly said, almost jumping out of his seat. He turned his head to me with a proud smile on his face. "You heard that, Anais? Cookie natin iyon."

I nodded my head, teary eyed. He had to pull me up my chair. I walked to the stage with shaky legs. I still couldn't believe my son's already a big boy now. Parang kailan lang baby pa siya, ngayon gagraduate na siya ng kindergarten. Coco and I walked up the stage and our little boy marched up the stage in his blue graduation gown and cap.

"Niccolo wants to be a monster truck driver when he grows up. His favorite cartoon is Paw Patrol and his birthday is his favorite day of the year. He is the boy scout of the year, best in Math, best in English, and most of all our little Valedictorian." Said his teacher as the principal handed him his graduation certificate. Sinabitan siya ng apat na medalya.

Coco bent one leg down to give our son a kiss on the forehead and he hugged him.

"You did a great job, baby." Mahinang bulong ko ng yakapin namin siya.

"Your Mommy and I are so proud of you." Pinugpog ni Coco ang anak namin ng halik.

The three of us posed for a picture before getting off the stage.

"Ang galing naman ng baby ko." Coco kissed him on the side of his head, our son sitting on his lap. "Manang-mana ka talaga sa Dada."

"Kay Papa Nick." He corrected. "Mama Cassie said you got sent to different schools for doing stupid things."

"She said that?" Coco feigned shock.

"Mmhm!" He nodded his head. "Tapos sabi ni Mama Cassie smart daw si Papa Nick lalo na sa math. And I got the best in math medal! Mama Cassie said Papa Nick and Tito Miggy went to Hogwart, she said it's a special school for smart people. I want to go there someday."

"It's Harvard, baby." I corrected, giggling. We just watched the movie Harry Potter last week and he'd probably mixed it up "Hogwarts is a school for Wizards."

"Oh right..." He nodded his head. "I want to go to Harvard like Tito Miggy and Papa Nick."

"That's good. Kaya kailangan mag-aral kang mabuti." Sabi ni Coco.

"My teacher says I'm smart. I always get perfect scores on my exam and quiz."

"Oo naman. Kaya ka nga valedictorian." Coco smiled.

"Mr and Mrs Lavigne." Cookie's teacher came up to us after the program.

"Just Ms. Lavigne and Daddy's not a Lavigne." He said and leaned over to his teacher. "You want to know why?"

"Why?" The teacher chuckled curiously.

"Caaause Papa Axel told me they're not married. Mrs is what you call a married woman. She's a Ms. Lavigne. Mama Val is the Mrs. Lavigne." He corrected.

I massaged my temples, feeling kind of embarrassed. Kung anu-anong sinasabi ni Dad kay Cookie, alam niya naman na walang preno ang bibig ng apo niya. "I'm sorry."

"Okay lang. He's a very smart little boy. Nakakatuwa nga." The teacher said.

"They can't get married because they're just bestfriends. They had me when they were really young. Hindi ba sabi mo sa akin iyon, Dada?" He asked.

Coco sighed with a slight embarrassed look. "I did but you don't have to tell that to people."

"Napakabibo at talino talaga ng anak niyo. Makulit nga lang sa klase minsan at akala mo hindi nakikinig pero pagdating sa mga tests palaging perfect." Kwento ng teacher niya. Obvious naman kung saan niya nakuha ang kakulitan niya. 

"He's a really active boy." I apologetically said.

"Nakikinig naman siya kapag pinagsabihin saka mabait naman siya." His teacher smiled. "Anyway, gusto ko lang i-congratulate si Niccolo. Congratulations sa inyo at sa little valedictorian niyo."

"Thank you, teacher." He grinned cheekily.

There was already a graduation party waiting for Niccolo when we got home. Tita Cassie and Mom were the ones who thought of this. I wouldn't say Dad and the Cordovas were already in good terms but atleast they're civil to each other now. Puro pahaging na lang kung magtalo si Dad at Tito Phoenix. Iyon lang naman ang mahalaga. Ayaw kong makalakihan ni Cookie na palaging magkaaway ang dalawang lolo niya. Hanggang ngayon hindi pa rin sila nag-uusap and I didn't think they'd ever talk again. Dad still occasionally bullies Coco but not as often as before.

"Valedictorian ang baby namin." Coco proudly announced while Cookie sat on his shoulder.

They all cheered for him and our son proudly laughed.

"Ang galing naman ng Cookie namin. Papa Nick's so proud of you, baby." Sabi ni Tito Phoenix.

"I got alot of medals! See! I got a best in Math and English award." He lifted his medals to show his grandpa.  

"Syempre si Papa Nick ng nagtuturo sa baby na yan." He proudly smiled.

Dad gave him a sideway glance and sneered. Then he looked at Cookie and smiled. "Si Papa Axel ang tumutulong sa'yo sa mga homeworks mo di ba?" 

"Yes, Papa!" He nodded his head.

Tito Phoenix made a face as if sensing the competition mode. "It's in the genes. Na mana mo yan sa akin."

"Your Mommy used to get alot of awards too. I don't know about your Dada." Dad mumbled, shaking his head.

"Dad!" I rolled my eyes. 

"What? I'm just telling the truth." He shrugged.

"Tama na nga yan." Mom cut them off. "Nagugutom na ba ang Cookie namin?" 

"Kind of." Cookie answered.

"I made you your favorite." Tita Cassie said in a sing song tone.

"Lasagna?" His eyes widened in excitement.

Tita Cassie nodded her head.

"Ibaba mo nga ang bata. Baka mahulog pa yan sa ginagawa mo." Dad's eyes narrowed at Coco. Agad naman siyang sumunod kay Dad at ibinaba mula sa balikat niya si Cookie.

"Kain ka muna then you can play with Chris and Arthur." Tita Cassie told him.

"Okey dokey!" He happily answered.

Sumama siya sa dalawang lola niya si Cookie. He held onto Mom in one hand and Tita Cassie in the other. The two talked as they bring Cookie to the table.

"Ang laki na talaga ng anak natin pero hanggang di pa rin ako tanggap ng Daddy mo. Mainit pa rin ang dugo sa akin." Coco sighed.

"Pagpasensyahan mo na lang." I rubbed his arm. "For him you're still the asshole who stole his little girl's innocence."

"Will he ever forgive me?" He asked.

"He needs a little more time but I think he eventually will. Pinaalam ko si Cookie na mapapadalas siya sa inyo ngayong bakasyon niya."

"What did your Dad said?"

"It took a lot of convincing but he eventually said okay. That's a good start, di ba?" I smiled.

He slowly nodded his head and then faced me. "I just want to be with my son. Ang mahalaga lang sa akin makakasama ko na si Cookie."

"I'm sorry." I looked at him, feeling guilty. 

"Sorry for what?"

"Sorry kasi hanggang ngayon nasa ganitong sitwasyon pa rin tayo. I know you want to be with him more often that you're allowed." 

"It's okay. Naiintindihan naman kita. I feel more sorry for our little guy there. Lumalaki na siya. He's going to be more aware of our situation. Remember when they had to draw a family picture in school?"

He came home with a drawing of two houses with our family on one house and Coco's family on the other and him in the middle of two families. It kind of made me sad when I saw the drawing. It just showed that he understood more than we think he did. I feel sorry for my son because we couldn't give him a normal family. 

I sighed, watching him play with Arthur and Toffie. They were running and Cookie was laughing carelessly. 

Questions started to cloud my mind. Paano kung isang araw makahanap na si Coco ng babaeng para sa kanya? What if one day he decided to get married and have his own family? What if I decide to have my own family? Paano na ang Cookie namin? Paano namin hahatiin ang oras ni Cookie?  

Sa totoo lang natatakot akong dumating ang araw na iyon. But I knew that time would eventually come. Hindi na kami bumabata. I was scared not just for Cookie but for the two of us. Hindi ko alam kung ano na ang mangyayari sa relasyon namin pag dumating ang panahon na iyon. Would we still remain good friends or would we drift apart? Coco had been my bestfriend for as long as I could remember.  Just the thought of not having him in my life anymore felt like there was an invisible weight resting on my chest. 

"Bakit?" He asked when he caught me staring at him. 

"Nothing." I shrugged. 

One corner of his lips lifted into a knowing smirk. "What are you thinking? I know that look. I can see those little wheels turning in that head of yours."

"Naisip ko lang si Cookie. Paano na siya kapag nagkapamilya na tayo? Siya ang higit na maaapektuhan sa atin."

He paused for awhile before talking. "Ang mahalaga malaman at maramdaman niyang mahal na mahal natin siya. At saka wala pa naman akong balak magkapamilya. Bakit ikaw? Nagpaplano ka na ba?"

I shook my head. "Hindi naman but I'm just thinking of the what ifs. Kahit anong mangyari hindi masisira ang friendship natin, ah.

"Of course not!" He exclaimed.

"Promise?" I pouted.

"Promise." He smiled. "Cookie is the life the connects mine from yours. Hangga't nandito siya hinding-hindi tayo masisira." 

COCO

I was already twenty five and I still live with my parents. I should've moved out when I finished college but I couldn't. I wanted to be near my son. Lalayo pa ba ako nasa tabi lang ng bahay namin nakatira ang anak ko. 

"Come on, get out of the tub." I told him while he was busy playing with his boat and action figures. 

"Dada, I'm still playing." He groaned defiantly.

Umupo ako sa gilid ng tub habang hawak ang paborita niyang shark towel. "Let's go. Mag-iisang oras ka na diyan."

"But Buzz still needs to save the boat!" He exclaimed.

"Dada will save the boat." I lifted the boat from the water and put it down on the side. "It's safe now. We need to get you out of there. Your fingers are getting pruney."

He finally stood up and I lifted him off the tub and dried him with the towel. I got him a fresh set of pajama and he took it from me.

"Do you need help, champ?" I asked.

"I got this. I know how to get dressed on my own. " He proudly said as he put on his briefs.

"My little superhero is growing up too fast." I mindlessly said. 

"I'm going to grow even more until I'm as tall as you. Parang kayo ni Papa Nick. Di ba you're his son?" He pulled his pajama bottom up his waist.

"Yeah. Someday you're going to grow big and strong." I told him. "You didn't tell me you want to be a monster truck driver."

We watched a monster truck show with Kuya Miggy and Dad last month. Tuwang tuwa siya ng makita ang malalaking kotse.

"I forgot to tell you. I want to be an astronaut, a Jedi, and also a wrestler. Oh and a doctor. But my teacher said I could only have one job."

"That's not true. You can be all the things you want to be when you grow up. Maybe someday you'll be a monster truck driving-jedi wrestling astronaut doctor." 

"And a superhero!" He added.

"And a superhero." I nodded my head. "Now let's get you your milk."

"Can I have chocolate milk, Dada?" He requested.

"Ano bang sabi ni Mymy? No chocolate milk at bedtime. You can only have it before dinner. Bukas na lang." I pinched his button nose.

"Okay!" He quickly agreed.

We went out of my room to get him a glass of warm milk. He drank all his milk and we were heading to my room when we decided he wanted to kiss his Papa Nick and Mama Cassie goodnight. We found Mama and Dad in the entertainment room, talking to Drey on the iPad. 

"There's our little valedictorian." Dad said as Cookie climbed on to his lap. 

"Say hi to your Tita Drey." Ma pointed the camera at him.

He waved at Drey. "Hi, Tita! I miss you!"

"I miss you too. You did a good job. Ang talino naman ng baby namin." Drey dotted at her nephew.

"I also got a boyscout, best in Math, and best in English award! Too bad I can't show you my medals, they're at Mymy's house." He said.

"That's alright. Natanggap mo na ang gift ko sa'yo?" She asked.

"Oo nga pala. There's Tita Drey's gift for you.." Mama pointed at the big box on the corner of the room wrapped in a blue wrapper.

"Can I open it?" Cookie's eyes sparkled with excitement.

"Of course! Yan ang graduation gift ko sa'yo!" Sagot ni Drey.

Cookie frantically ripped the wrapper open and he asked me to help open the box so he could see what was inside. I pulled a child sized motor car out of the box.

"COOL!" His eyes widened in amusement. 

"Sabi ni Papa Nick mo sa akin gusto mo daw matutong magdrive." Drey said.

"Thank you, Tita Drey! Thank you!  Thank you!" He kissed the camera.

"Aw. you're welcome, little monster." She fondly smiled.

"Can I drive it?" Cookie asked me.

"Bukas na lang. Madilim na sa labas." I told him.

"Oooh. A car!" Arthur suddenly ran inside the room and Ronnie followed behind him.

"Nako, Ma! Yang anak mo ang hirap patulugin! Gusto na naman tumabi sa inyo." Ronnie rolled her eyes.

"That's alright. Itatabi na lang namin siya." Sabi ni Mama. "Halika nga dito, Arthur."

"Ma..." I heard Drey whisper with restraint in her voice.

"Si Ate ba yan?" Ronnie snatched the iPad from Mama and held it. "Hi, Ate! Kumusta na?"

"I want to see Ate Drey!" Arthur cheerfully said. 

Ronnie paused and looked at Arthur. Tension was evident in the air. "Baby, doon ka muna kay Mama. Manonood kayo ng movie."

"But I want to talk to Ate Drey." He said.

"Come here, Arthur. Let's watch a movie. Ano bang gusto mong panoorin? You get to pick what movie to watch." Dad quickly lifted Arthur up in his arms and they sat on the theatre recliner. 

"I can stay up all night?" He asked.

"You can stay up until the end of the movie." Sabi ni Mama. "Hindi ka pwedeng magpuyat."

"Drey." I said, unsmiling as I squeezed into the view. "Huwag ka naman ganyan sa bata."

"Oo nga, Ate. Arthur's a nice kid. Alam mo ang sweet niya saka-"

"Wala akong pakialam." She told us with cold dead eyes. "I don't have an ounce of care for him."

"Stop saying that, Drey!" Mariing sabi ko.

"Kung hindi lang ako sinundan nina Mama at Dad dito sa California, sana itinuloy ko na yung..." 

"I don't want to hear you say that." Mariin akong napapikit.

Audrey let out a huff. "Tatawag na lang ulit ako."

She suddenly turned off her camera and Ronnie and I looked at each other. I playfully messed up her dark hair. "She's been through alot. Intindihin mo na lang."

"No woman should ever go through what she did." Ronnie's eyes watered.

"I know." I silently whispered.

Drey moved to California after what had happened to her. Gusto niyang lumayo dito para makalimutan ang nangyari sa kanya. She wanted to be in a new environment and start a new life. Everyone tried so hard to forget about that nightmare but Dad was still trying relentlessly to find the group who abused Drey. He wanted them to pay for what they did to my twin. Iyon din ang gusto kong mangyari pero sa ngayon wala silang mahanap-hanap na kahit anong bakas ng may sala sa insidenteng iyon. Dad had a fair amount of people investigated. None of the investigations had found any conclusive or direct link to that incident. 

"Tita Drey gave me this car." Narinig kong sabi ni Cookie.

"She did?" Arthur asked.

"It's her graduation gift for me because I did a good job in school. Bukas sabi ni Dada, we can drive my car. Di ba, Dada?"

I nodded my head and forced a smile. "Turuan mo si Arthur magdrive. Play nice."

"Okay!" He answere. 

"Don't I get a gift from Ate Drey?" He turned his head to Mama.

"Syempre, meron din. Pero bukas pa dadalhin ng delivery guy yung gift." Ma explained. 

"Daddy, Mama I want to go to school too! I want to be like Cookie. I also want Ate Drey to tell me 'Good job, Arthur!'" He said, enthusiasm in his innocent voice.

Ma kissed the side of his head. There was a somber atmosphere in the air for awhile. Ronnie broke it and suggested we should watch a movie. We stayed in the entertainment room and watched a cartoon movie Cookie and Arthur agreed to watch. 

Pagkatapos ng movie ay binuhat ko na si Cookie papunta sa kwarto ko. He hadn't fully fallen asleep yet but his eyes were already hooded. Ibinaba ko siya sa kama at tinignan ang graduation pictures niya. I took the wallet sized picture of Anais, Cookie and I. He was in his blue graduation gown while I had him in one arm and Anais was clutching on my other arm. I took out my leathered wallet and opened it. There was a picture of Anais in her black graduation Toga with Cookie on her lap. Ang anak namin ang pinili niyang isama sa graduation pictorial niya. I found it cute and asked if I could have it, since then the picture had always been in my wallet so I could carry them with me whenever I go. 

"Dada." Cookie called in his tired, sleepy voice as he clutched his old worn out Paw Patrol stuffed animal. 

"Yeah?" 

"Is that Mymy?" He rested his tiny blonde head over my shoulder. 

"It's you and Mymy. Don't you remember this? Mymy also graduated a few years ago. You became her inspiration in finishing college." 

"I remember some of it." He yawned.

I slipped our new picture in and kissed my son. "You became our inspiration. Thank you for coming into my life, Cookie."

"You're welcome." He smiled. 

Hiniga ko ulit siya sa kama. I tucked him in and he soon fell asleep.

We were to pick up Anais at her work tonight and maybe take Cookie to his favorite pizza arcade house. Tuwing Friday kasi coding ang kotse ni Anais. She was the editor in chief of one of the most influential fashion magazines in Asia, Stilleto.

 The probably was we were already more than half an hour late. Masyado akong nalibang sa pakikipaglaro kay Cookie at Arthur. They had driving Cookie's motor car and I lost track of time. Nakaalis naman kami sa tamang oras, ang problema naipit kami sa traffic. It was already rush hour, we left later than usual.

"Dada, are we there yet?" He asked as he sat on his booster sit on the back.

"Almost." I said, turning left to the building where Anais worked. "Your Mymy must be really pissed off by now."

I parked my car and got out of it. I opened the backdoor, unbuckling my son from his seat and pulling him out. We walked into the building and as we were about to enter, we saw Anais. She was talking and laughing with the man beside him.

"Hi, Mymy!" Cookie greeted when he saw his Mommy. 

Anais paused and then got on one knee when she saw our son. She hugged him and gave him a kiss on the lips. "Cookie! I missed you, baby."

"I missed you too." Our son hugged her back. 

I eyed the guy Anais was with. I looked at him from head to toe. He looked like a hipster with his   hair hanging down his shoulders, his blue striped sweatshirt and his pants. He seemed to be a fashionable guy which only made sense because I assumed he was Anais' colleague.

Anais stood straight up and looked at me. "Akala ko hindi na kayo darating. I kept calling you but your phone's off."

"Naiwan ko sa bahay." I shrugged.

"Oo nga pala, this is Froilan, advertising manager siya dito." He introduced the guy to me. "Froilan, this is Coco and my son, Cookie."

"Nice to meet you, pare." He held his hand out to me.

I took his hand and shook it, not taking his eyes off from his. My eyes slightly narrowed into a slit. I gave it a tight squeeze of warning before letting go of his hand. 

"Nice to meet you too, little fellow. I've heard so much about you. Madalas kang ikwento sa akin ng Mommy mo. Congrats nga pala. I heard you graduated as a valedictorian." He told my son in a sweet voice. I hated that he knew about Cookie. How could Anais share information about our son to a guy we still haven't met?

"Thanks, Mr. Froilan." He smiled.

"Can I get a high five?" He held his palm out for a high five.

My son's palm slapped against his. 

"Good job, little monster." He said. How does he even know 'little monster' was our endearment for him?

"Where were you supposed to go?" I asked Anais in an icy tone.

"Magtataxi na lang sana ako kaso nag-offer si Froilan na ihatid na ako. Kala ko kasi di na kayo darating." She said.

My temples began to throb. "Well, now we're here. Let's go. Kanina pa nagugutom ang bata."

"Are you Mommy's friend?" He asked, innocently. 

"Yes, I am." The hipster answered.

I grabbed Cookie's wrist. "Come on, say goodbye to your friend. We need to go."

"Okay!" He easily agreed and looked at the guy. "Bye bye, Mr. Froilan."

"Bye bye, Cookie monster." He waved at my son.

"Salamat sa offer, Froi. Aalis na kami." Paalam ni Anais.

I dragged my son back to the car and buckled him up in his booster seat. I quietly slipped into my car and Anais sat on the passenger's seat next to me.

"How did he know about Cookie being a valedictorian?" I asked, furiously staring the engine.

"Syempre, kinuwento ko sa mga katrabaho ko." She answered.

"You can't just go around telling people our son doesn't even know informations about him." I scolded.

"Ano'ng masama dun? I'm just proud of him." Her brows furrowed. "Bakit ba ang init ng ulo mo?"

"Paanong hindi iinit ang ulo ko? You're basically putting my son's life at stake. It's creepy having a grown man come up to my child and tell informations about my son only we should know." 

"Ang OA mo naman, Nicholas! Kilala ko naman ang mga katrabaho ko. I'm just proud of Cookie. Gusto ko lang naman ishare sa mga kaibigan ko." 

"At bakit ka sasama sa lalaking iyon? Hindi ka pa ba nadadala sa ginawa ni Steve? I don't know if you're naive or just plain stupid?" I shook my head.

"Huwag mo akong idamay sa init ng ulo mo." Anais said in an equally pissed tone. "Kilala ko si Froilan. We've worked together for years and I know he's a good guy! Don't you dare call me stupid! Oo, napapayag mo ako sa gusto mong gawin sa akin noon pero hindi ako tanga, Coco!"

"I'm sorry..." Mahinang sabi ko ng mahimasmasan ako. 

"Are you fighting?" Cookie asked.

"No, we're not." I answered.

Hindi kumibo si Anais. She turned her head away from me, looking through the side window. 

"Anais..." I took her hand in my right hand and squeezed it. "Nabigla lang ako."

She snatched it away from my hold. 

"You know how paranoid I get. Natatakot lang akong mangyari ulit ang ginawa ni Steve sa'yo at ayaw ko din mangyari ulit ang nangyari kay Audrey." I huffed.

She remained quiet.