Alexis pov
For confusion, it's the night before

.

Everyone gathered around a small fire that had been lit in the church yard. We sat on a log and devoured the smores we were given. I passed around a few beers I had snuck in

"Never have I ever had sex while my parents were home" Abeke said

Tokyo pulled a finger down, so did Jade and Maddison

"Damn, y'all wild" I chuckled

"Oh don't you dare" Tokyo said

"What?" I asked, knowing damn well what was happening

"You better put that finger down Graceffa" Tokyo playfully glared

"Fine" I placed my finger down, a girl has needs

"Acting all innocent and shit, you got 4 fingers down Alexis!" Abeke yelled

"That makes me feel so good about myself" I playfully clutched my heart. I'm different, people make me feel like shit about my lack of commitment

Honestly? I'm not ready to give myself fully to someone. I can't imagine going through the pain of giving your entire soul to someone and having them take it for granted. Not again.

I was used, mistreated, played like a fool. I'll be caught dead before I give someone that advantage again

"Alright, never have I ever been cheated on" Danny says

Literally no-one places their finger down.
Although they didn't know, I still felt a target on my back

I placed my final finger down and everyone's eyes were on me. Suddenly the memories flood back in. My jaw locked, grinding my teeth together

"whoa, are you serious right now?" Tokyo furrowed her brows

"What the fuck happened" Jade asked
"If you're comfortable with speaking about it" she added

"I really don't wanna talk about it" I say getting up

"I'll see you guys tomorrow, check my bags, I have a couple sleeping bags so you guys don't sleep on the bare grass, have fun guys, sleep well" I waved, they all said a sad goodbye and I went on my way

Was I being dramatic?
It was a trigger for the past that I've been trying so hard to forget about

I attempted to clear my mind by going for a walk, my feet lazily dragging over the grass

I was totally being extra right? I didn't have to leave. But I wanted to

My shoulder leaned against a tree, my eyes giving their attention to the beautiful of the night

The whistle of the wind sung like music to my ears, the stars of the night called my name

The bright stars reflected onto my eyes, I took a few deep breaths in from my nostrils before slowly exhaling. My head leaned against the tree

"Alexis?" a small voice came from nearby

"Isabella?" my head turned in her direction, I hadn't noticed a tent was setted up less than a feet away

"What are you doing out here?" I asked, it was a pretty good distance away from the rest of the campers

"I like my space, plus I got a whole tent for myself" she chuckled, her head was poking out the tent while her body was inside

"You okay? Thought you guys were having a bonfire out there"

"It's just nature and I right now"

"well do you wanna come in, it's freezing" she says. It honestly was cold as shit.

"Why aren't you at the bonfire, there's beer" I say stepping into the tent and zipping it securely

"I just prefer to be alone"

"I guess I'm gonna keep you company"

"I don't mind" her eyes met mine

"Why were you out there?" she ask

"Just clearing my mind"

"Wanna talk about it?" I sighed, honestly only one person knew about my past relationship.

Isabel did share a deep part of her past with me. Does that mean I have to tell her mine? No. But did I want to tell her?
For some reason, I do

I felt like I could completely be myself around her. I ran a finger through my hair before starting my story

*trigger warning, abuse of drugs, alcohol and sexual harassment*

"A while back, I met this girl... Aurora, she was just as beautiful as her name. It was so crazy how hard I fell for her.
We talked everyday, all-day. I was addicted to this girl" I shook my head

"A passionate love turned toxic, she started hanging out with some friends. After that, she was a completely different person.
Aurora was the sweetest human being I ever met, it amazed me what pills and drowning yourself in alcohol can do to someone" I covered my face with my palms. I tried to control my breathing

"Everyday I blamed myself for what she was doing to herself, What was I doing wrong? What was she trying to escape from? Her parents and I always tried to come up with a plan to get her away from these toxic people. But She always found a way back down that hole..... She started treating me like shit, when we were with her friends, she'd just try to grope me everywhere, her friends would laugh but I felt super uncomfortable. Her fingers felt like needles on my body. When I yelled at her to stop, she'd just tell me I was being dramatic."

"She kept saying I belonged to her and she could do whatever she wanted to me.....
When I refused to have sex with her, she'd... Call me all sorts of names.
I remember once she had a broken piece of glass to my neck and demanded sex, like I was a toy she could throw around.
I felt like was staring into the eyes of a monster.
Thankfully she got a call and left, I couldn't imagine what she would have done that day."

"I was so stupidily in love with her, I kept pushing excuses in my head, she's gonna change. She's just going through a rough time.
I was a fool for her"

"She was a black hole for love. Just sucking it all up.
Was it healthy to love someone that much? To let them toss you around like a rag doll?" I almost screamed

"Then.. One day she snuck out to a party, luckily a friend was there, he called me and I drove over there around 2am. Everyone was almost knocked out, asleep on the floor or in the backyard smoking. Then I heard something upstairs" I sighed

"I went into one the rooms, only to be met with the love of my life fucking some guy" I wiped a tear that was escaping my eye.

"You don't have to continue if you're not comfortable" Isabella says placing a hand on my shoulder

"No no, it's okay, I've buried this down for so long, it's just unusual for me to even think about it again" Isabella interlocked our fingers and I swore I felt a spark shoot through my entire body. She nodded for me to continue

"She didn't even stop, she just looked me in the eye and continued riding this guy, she even fucking smiled at me. Can you fucking believe that!"

"The next day she didn't even try to talk to me, she just.... Told everyone I was an experiment" by now my tears were uncomfortable. The hot stream ran down my cheek, my breathing heavy

"How could I be so fucking stupid Isabel? Why didn't I fucking see through all her fucking shit. How could I let someone use me like that. Fuck"

I was a crying mess. My knees pressed against my chest and my face buried into them. I let it all go. Every tear represented the days I stupidly allowed her to use me.

Isabel wrapped her arms around me from behind, I melted into her touch.
My back laid against her chest. Her head rested on the back of mine, she drew circles around my shoulders in attempt to calm me down

"I'm so sorry" she whispered
"I'm so sorry, I'm sorry" she repeated in my ear

"You're the most confident person I know, I'm so pissed someone could even treat you like that. She never deserved you. I'm so sorry you had to go through that, it must have been so painful" she mumbled out

"You shouldn't blame yourself, some people just have demons locked away inside them. Some people just can't be saved" her fingers combed through my hair

"I'll kill her" Isabella mumbled. I chuckled while wiping away my tears

"You will?" I ask smiling

"yes, you don't believe me?"

"You can't harm a fly"

"Because they're disgusting to even be around"

"See!" I chuckled "You're so sweet"

"And you're beautiful. Inside and out. You're raw and you're not afraid to be vulnerable. You give off such confidence, but you have broken pieces. I'm honoured that you chose to share that with me" she smiled

I turned my body to mirror hers. Our faces inches apart, her legs on top of mine.

"You know, no-one's ever said something like that to me" I tucked a strand of hair behind her ear

"I'm glad I could be the first" she showed her pearly whites. Her nose scrunched up. My pulse rapidly speeding up. A wave of pleasure ran down my spine

"You're driving me crazy" I whispered

"How so?" she asked

"I'm never this vulnerable with anyone"

"Maybe I'm not just anyone"

"That scares me" I cupped her cheeks, our eyes locked, her pink lips begged to be kissed

"What about your girlfriend?"

"Jade? She's not my girlfriend"

"You two seem pretty close"

"We're friends... That casually hook up. It's shitty to be saying that out loud, especially right now"

"So you're allowed to hookup with anyone you want?" she asked, her hand rested on my waist. I looked at her hands before finding my way back to her eyes

"It sounds terrible, I know. But we're both just not ready for something so serious"

"Can we be friends with benefits?" she asked getting closer. I tilted my head and observed her

"Are you serious?"

"I've never been more serious about anything"

"But-"

"But what?"

"I don't wanna treat you like some random hookup Isabel. You're special. My heart's racing right now by being so close to you. You're driving me crazy Isabel"

"And you're driving me crazy" she whispered, her eyes fell onto my lips before returning to my eyes

My thumb stroked her cheek, she placed her hand on my wrist

"I trust you, I want this, no strings attached. I don't wanna confuse anything more in your life right now but. I want you so bad" she whispered, her lips barely grazing mine. I felt the heat run through my body. I shut my eyes tightly, trying to contain my emotions

"Are you sure this is what you want?"

"I'm sure"

Finally, our lips collided. Her sweet lips moved against mine. Sparks and butterflies erupting in me

I pulled her closer, desperately needing to taste her

I felt like I was floating, our kiss was so passionate. It was something I'd never experienced before.

It felt special, I was loosing my mind at how quickly I was ready to open myself to someone.

My body felt like it was in fire, our tongues roamed each other's mouth. I leaned forward, laying her flat without disrupting our kiss. Her legs were hooked around my back, her arms wrapped around my neck pulling me closer.

My teeth sunk into her bottom lip and I slowly tugged on them. A moan escaped her throat and I almost lost it.

My lips trailed down her neck, I placed small kisses on a sensitive area before sinking my teeth into the flesh

Her back arched, I felt fingernails dig into my back, I continued sucking harshly on the flesh before running a wet tongue over the sensitive area.

My hips grinded against her front and my lips met hers again. She moaned in my mouth

I pulled apart, feeling light headed. Her lips were swollen, her hair ruffed.
I admired the small girl beneath me. Her pupils were fully dialated

"I can't... not here" I whispered
"I'll make it up to you, I promise" I placed a tender kiss on her lips before rolling off of her

I laid on my back, my eyes staring up at the head of the tent

"You don't have to explain, I'll wait as long as it takes" Isabella says, her arm draped across my stomach, she propped herself on her elbow.

"Where did I find you" I ask

"In a tent near a tree" we chuckled

I brought my fingers back to her cheek, stroking it gently.

"You're gonna regret agreeing to this"