Part 54

"Go ahead, open it, take a look!" Randhir asked Sanyukta to unwrap the gift box he had handed to her. She opened it with some apprehension only to find a gold chain with two pendants in it, one leaf shaped and another one that resembled a fruit. She was perplexed, it was not unusual for the Shekhawats to buy expensive presents, she had seen the gold cross with a chain that Randhir had gifted Nafisa's baby. But she was unsure if she should be accepting anything valuable from Randhir, especially after what had happened at the temple earlier that day.

"What's the matter? You don't like it?" Randhir asked, noticing her hesitation. 

"Of course I like it, it is beautiful! But I'm not sure I can accept this, Randhir. Nobody has given me such a lavish present before!" She did not want to bring up the temple incident so she stuck to the other reason.

"Like I said before, you don't turn eighteen every day. This is an oak leaf and acorn ornament, together they symbolise endurance, patience and faith. The oak tree begins life in the form of its humble seed- the acorn, but it perseveres until it has towered well above others. Likewise though you had a modest beginning in life you carry within yourself the potential to rise high like the oak tree. Here, let me put it on for you." He offered to fasten it around her neck but she held his hand, preventing him from doing so.

"Please Randhir, don't!" The tears she was struggling to contain began cascading down her cheeks. She felt embarrassed for letting her emotions take over but there was nothing she could do.

"Mowgli, please don't cry, what happened?" Randhir was taken aback to see her tears. The next moment she began sobbing and rushed into his arms to seek the comfort she was craving.

"Why Randhir? Is it fair to be humiliated for one's roots? Is my identity confined to being a Devdasi's descendant? Why did your mother do this?" She wailed, unable to hold herself back.

"Shhh, Mowgli! Stop already. You are a big girl now, don't cry on your birthday!" Randhir had not anticipated her to react this way. He knew that his mother had erred. Like his father he too felt guilty about what Renuka had done. Elsewhere his father was trying to make amends for the same reason, trying to compensate for Renuka's transgression!

"I did not choose to be born into this background nor did you choose to be the son of an influential family. Is one's caste, community and faith not a mere accident of birth?" She tried to wipe her tears away although she was still overwhelmed by humiliation. She had felt numb at the temple but during her return journey her mind had been invaded by Renuka's words.

"Mowgli, you are a fighter! You have faced huge odds at a tender age and have prevailed over some very demanding circumstances. My mother's behaviour is unpredictable in matters concerning your mother and yourself. Please forgive her and forget her words, they only manifest her insecurity. Come now, calm down!" He held her in his arms while she continued to sob. She drew herself back to face him. Something in his words had triggered her ire.

"It is not insecurity but her hatred and revulsion for my mother and me. What have we done to make her feel that way? Has my mother ever tried to lure your father away from her? Has she ever asked him for any favour? Her only fault was falling in love with him, and that was before your mother came into the picture. I know affluence makes some people arrogant but that does not give them the right to belittle lesser mortals like us! I am sorry Randhir but I cannot accept your gift. If your mother found about this she could claim that it is the price you paid for having your way with me. I am sure her ancestors had the privilege of deflowering several girls of my background, which is why she spoke loud and clear for all ears to hear that she thought my mother was announcing my debut into the flesh trade by dedicating me to the shrine." Her anger had dried her tears.

Randhir was stunned, he knew she was disturbed but he had not anticipated an outburst of this magnitude. The girl sitting next to him in the car was no longer the gawky awkward teenager he had known her to be. Her entry into adulthood had changed the equation between them. A few days ago she was infatuated by him but now she was fighting to stop herself obsessing over him because his mother had sent her a loud and clear message. She was no longer Mowgli the wild child, she had morphed overnight into an adult Sanyukta.

"Sanyukta, listen to me. Humiliation and indignation have more to do with one's reaction to a provocation. No one can make you feel small without your consent. People's words may come across as hateful because they are often victims of their own thoughts and beliefs. You cannot choose the circumstances of your birth but you can always uphold your self esteem by filtering other people's opinions about you. By reacting adversely you are simply affirming their impression of you. If someone calls you a criminal does it make you one? No, it only means that someone else can easily manage to convince you that you are one. My mother made a terrible mistake and I apologise on her behalf."

"I did not want to tell you this today but soon the friction between our mothers will become inconsequential. My father and I are going to the US for a few years to expand our business, my mother is joining us there. You don't have to accept my gift if it makes you feel comfortable. I understand, I will have it returned, don't fret. By the way, I almost forgot to say that you looked beautiful in traditional clothes- all grown up, not like the Mowgli I used to know. In a few days I am leaving the country, I don't know when I may come back. But when I do you will be a grown woman, perhaps with a career, a husband and kids of your own. Whatever the circumstances I am glad we became friends and hope that we continue to remain so. I think we should head homeward now, you mother will be waiting for you!" He gave her a friendly pat on her head and started the car.

Sanyukta fell silent. She simply stared ahead brooding over his words. It had sounded like he was saying goodbye. She leaned her head against the car window trying to drown out the storm raging in her head. As if Renuka's words were not severe enough now Randhir was confirming his plans of going abroad. Her heart felt like a ton of lead inside her. She knew that her advent into adulthood would coincide with Randhir's departure to the US but now that she was standing at that cusp she found the prospect unbearable. She felt powerless. She was sure that between the two of them only she was feeling this way. He looked calm as ever, probably because he was looking forward to going away while she was praying to prevent that from happening.


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