CHAPTER TWENTY FOUR » SUSPICION
"I'm a monster."

♔

The floorboards creaking beneath someone's feet caught my attention, but I continued to stare at the pale, dull, white wall in front of me. The thoughts swimming around my head were driving me insane but I didn't want to face anybody. After everything that had happened, along with Dale's funeral earlier, I just couldn't face anyone.

"Why couldn't you tell me?"

Emotion caught thickly in my throat and I caught my breath, trying to hold back the tears in my eyes. Glenn's footsteps could be heard again as he shifted closer to me. I felt the bed dip down and I let out a defeated sigh. "I'm sorry."

"It's okay."

"It's not."

"Blaire-"

I shook my head vigorously, cutting him off. "I'm a killer Glenn," I stated, finally turning my head to face him. "I've killed people."

"You didn't have a choice," he said, his warm hand resting on top of mine. "No one's going to blame you for that."

"How can you love me after-" I cut off, shaking my head again. "After I-"

"It's okay," he assured, his voice gentle as he squeezed my hand tighter. "It's okay."

"I was going to do it. When Dale- when he-" A cry caught in my throat and I paused, turning away from him and taking a shaky breath. "I would have done it, just to make it all stop."

"I would have too."

I whipped my head around to face him again and stood up, feeling a painful pull at my stitches. I ignored it, shaking my head at him. "But you wouldn't have Glenn, would you?! You wouldn't do it, you wouldn't be able do it. Because you're a decent guy - you're a good guy!"

"Blaire, it's okay-"

"It's not! It's not okay!" The two of us fell silent again and I looked away, slowly placing my head in my hands. "What have I become?" I whispered, my eyes glazing over with tears as I looked over at Glenn's completely crushed face. "I'm a monster."

He stood up slowly, moving closer to me, his hands softly cupping my face. My eyes flickered up, meeting his soft brown ones, full of hurt and compassion. "You're not a monster."

He moved to wrap his arms tightly around me and I froze for a moment before leaning closer to him and burying my head in his chest, tears spilling down my cheeks and onto his shirt. "Dale was right," I mumbled, holding Glenn tightly, in fear of letting him go. "We're all broken."

~

"Gone?" I shouted after Rick that evening, crossing my arms over my chest. I was having a hard time comprehending exactly what he was trying to say. "How the hell can he just be gone?"

"The cuffs are still hooked," He stated as I stepped inside the shed where Randall was supposed to be. "He must' slipped 'em."

"Is that possible?" Carl asked, taking a look around.

"It is if you've got nothing to lose."

"This is ridiculous," I commented, glancing over at Rick again. "There's no way he could have got out."

"The door was secured from the outside," Hershel said, looking over at me as he nodded his head in agreement with my statement. I moved over to the door, looking at where Hershel's finger was pointing. He was right, there was only a lock on the outside.

"He had help," I said, turning back around and placing my hands on my hips. "Somebody helped him get out."

"Rick! Rick!" Shane's voice suddenly boomed from somewhere outside. With a sigh, we all headed out of the shed. I paused, squinting to see further in the distance. Shane was storming out of the woods with a roaring flame of anger in his body language, and dribbles of blood running down his face. This wasn't going to be good.

"What happened?" Rick asked once he came close enough.

"He's armed! He's got my gun!" Shane replied, his voice loud and scratchy.

"Are you okay?"

"I'm fine. Little bastard just snuck up on me. He clocked me in the face." I narrowed my eyes at Shane, turning my head back towards Rick again in confusion. Shane's story, whilst not being impossible, didn't exactly seem true. Not only did it seem rehearsed but I was finding it hard to believe that Randall could manage to do any damage to Shane of all people.

"All right. Hershel, T-Dog, get everybody back in the house," Rick ordered, glancing over at the group. "Blaire, Glenn, Daryl, come with us."

As everyone started to disperse, I rushed towards Rick, trying to pull him away from Shane. "It can't be just me that thinks something isn't right-"

"Blaire, now isn't the time," he dismissed, turning back around again. I scoffed, looking back over at Glenn, who was watching me with a frown.

"You okay?"

"No," I replied, taking his hand and moving him further away from the group. "Something isn't right about Shane's story. I'm worried one of us is gonna get hurt."

"By Randall?"

I sighed, glancing up in the air. "I meant hurt by Shane."

"Blaire, come on-"

"Oh my god, you're all so-" I cut off, releasing my hand from his. "You know what, forget I said anything."

"Hey, don't-" I spun back around again on my heel, watching as Glenn came over to me. "You're still upset, maybe you should stay behind with-"

I tilted my head to the side, frowning at what he'd just said. Glenn of all people should know that there was no way in hell I would just stay put. "Are you serious right now?"

Realising what he'd said, Glenn's eyes shuffled to the ground and he bit his lip awkwardly. "Can we forget I said that?"

The six of us began to head into the woods shortly after, all on high alert, especially me, and armed with weapons.

"I saw him head up through the trees that way before I blacked out," Shane spoke up as I carefully avoided tripping over a log. "I'm not sure how long."

"He couldn't have gotten far," Rick said. "He's hobbled, exhausted."

"And armed," Glenn added.

"So are we," I replied, giving him a reassuring smile. Despite the fact I was still slightly annoyed at Glenn, mostly for not taking my thoughts about Shane seriously, I knew how worried he was about this. I didn't want to shut him out.

Rick glanced at Daryl. "Can you track him?"

Daryl's eyes were glued to the ground, but he shook his head. "No, I don't see nothing."

"Hey, look, there ain't no use in tracking him, okay?" Shane said, irritation clear in his voice as he impatiently lifted his arm up. "He went that way. We need to pair up. We spread out, we just chase him down. That's it."

"Kid weighs a buck-25 soaking wet. You trying to tell us he got the jump on you?" Daryl asked, clocking on to exactly what I'd been thinking about earlier.

"I say a rock pretty much evens those odds, wouldn't you?" Shane replied defensively.

"Not really, no," I challenged, narrowing my eyes at him. He stared at me harshly, but I refused to back down. "Not against you."

"Listen-"

"Alright, knock it off," Rick said, shooting me a warning look. "You, Glenn and Daryl start heading up the right flank. Me and Shane'll take the left. Remember, Randall's not the only threat out there. Keep an eye out for each other."

"Too right he's not," I said, my eyes stopping on Shane for a moment before I addressed Rick again. "You be careful too."

Hesitantly, I turned back around to face Glenn and Daryl. The three of us shared a brief look before Daryl took the lead and began walking. Glenn and I followed behind silently.

We were walking for a long time. Long enough to see the sun completely disappear and leave us in total darkness, which made things a hell of a lot harder.

"This is pointless," Daryl stated after a while. "You got a light?"

I stopped and turned around to see Glenn shuffling about to get something, eventually handing a torch to Daryl.

"Are you kidding me," I muttered to him. "You couldn't have got that out earlier?"

"Sorry."

We continued walking again, until all three of us came to a simultaneous halt. I noticed that we were in the exact same place that we'd started at.

"We're just back to square one," Glenn pointed out.

"If you're gonna do a thing, you might as well do it right," Daryl said, pointing the flashlight forwards and beginning to walk again, causing me to groan...until I realised we were going in the direction Shane really hadn't wanted us to go.

"This is pointless," I stated after a long while of not finding anything again.

"But we have a light-" Glenn started, but I shook my head, cutting him off.

"I'm not talking about the light. I'm talking about the fact that there's one person who knows exactly what happened and probably knows where Randall is," I turned, facing the two of them. "Shane."

"You're still serious about this?" Glenn asked, his eyebrows arching into a frown. "You think Shane would do that?"

"Yeah, I think he would."

"There's two sets of tracks right here," Daryl said, pointing down at the ground. "Shane must've followed him a lot longer than he said."

I came to a stop, placing my hand against the rough bark of the tree beside me. Daryl shone the flashlight in my direction, and my eyes flickered down to see a patch blood covering the tree just underneath where my hand was situated. "There's fresh blood on this tree."

"There's more tracks," Daryl added, continuing to walk again. "Looks like they're walking in tandem."

Glenn and I followed until Daryl came to a sudden halt, causing Glenn to bump into him. "Sorry."

"There was a little dust up right here," Daryl stated, pointing at the ground again.

"What do you mean?" Glenn asked quietly.

"He means something went down," I said, crouching down to try and get a look at the trail, although I couldn't really see much. "This is just getting weird."

A sudden noise caught my attention, startling me. Instinctively, I reached for the knife in my belt loop, preparing to use it. The three of us quickly moved out of sight and I pressed my back up against a tree, holding my breath.

Turning slightly, I saw a dark figure shuffling through the woods, deep growls emitting from it's mouth. Knowing it was a walker, I tightened my grip around the handle of my knife, pulling it out. My eyes followed its movements, noticing it come face to face with Glenn. Daryl was quick to move, shooting an arrow at it but missing and causing the walker to stumble in his direction. I moved from my hiding place, rushing over as it started to corner Daryl. Wasting no time, I plunged the knife into it's skull and pushed it away, pulling the blood coated knife out.

"Nice," Daryl commented as the three of us proceeded to peer down at the corpse, coming to the realisation that it was Randall. Daryl bent down beside him, presumably checking for bites until he looked up again, seeming confused. "He's got no bites."

"Yeah, none you can see," Glenn replied.

I moved so I was knelt beside Daryl. The two of us searched over him again but there was nothing. "Got his neck broke," Daryl stated. "I'm telling you, he died from this."

I began to feel a sickness in the pit of my stomach. The suspicion I had about it being Shane was seeming to become more and more likely.

"How's that possible?" Glenn asked, his voice just above a whisper. I swallowed thickly, knowing exactly how that was possible. And as much as I wanted to tell the two of them, I couldn't even do that.

"We should head back," I said, breaking the questioning silence that had hung over the air. "Come on, let's go."

Nobody spoke on the way back. Not until a loud gunshot rang out when we weren't too far from the farm. Wincing, I glanced around me, trying to pinpoint where the sound game from.

"Do you think that was them?" Glenn asked nervously, his eyes widening with fear.

"They might be back by now," I said, unsure on whether I was trying to reassure him or myself.

Nonetheless, the three of us headed inside the house, only to be met with the others anxious gazes. But no Rick or Shane.

"Rick and Shane ain't back?" Daryl blurted, glancing around the room.

"No," Lori replied, causing the worry to build up inside me, as well as causing the tense atmosphere to heighten.

"We heard a shot," I said.

"Maybe they found Randall?" She suggested calmly, but I shook my head.

"We found him."

"Is he back in the shed?" Patricia questioned obliviously.

"He's a walker," Daryl informed and I watched as everybody's faces seemed to express different emotions. Relief, confusion, shock.

"Did you find the walker that bit him?" Olivia asked, leaning forwards.

"No," Glenn answered, his tone of voice still showing his bemusement about the situation. "The weird thing is he wasn't bit."

"His neck was broke," Daryl finished.

"So he fought back?"

"The thing is, Shane and Randall's tracks were right on top of each other. And Shane ain't no tracker, so he didn't come up behind him," Daryl explained. "They were together."

Noticing everyone's on edge looks and feeling nerves building up inside me, I turned back around to face Daryl. "I'm going back."

"All right, me too," Daryl already began walking towards the door, with Glenn nodding in agreement.

"I'll come," Olivia offered standing up and heading over to us. Everyone began to move towards the porch and I started to follow too until Glenn tugged me back.

"Hey, you okay?" He asked, his hands comfortingly placed on my shoulders.

"I'm worried," I said with a sigh, thinking back to the gunshot that went off earlier. "Shane's dangerous. What if that gunshot-"

"Don't think about that," he interrupted quickly, giving me a small smile. "It's gonna be okay. We'll find them."

I nodded solemnly, giving Glenn a weak smile in return. Heavy footsteps caught my attention and Olivia ran inside, her face completely drained of colour. "We have a problem."

Taking Glenn's hand, we followed Olivia out onto the dimly lit porch, where a lot loud groans and dragging feet could be heard. I could already feel the dread deep inside me.

"Patricia, kill the lights."

My heart sunk completely and I felt my eyes widening in shock. Glenn's grip on my hand tightened as fear began to take over my mind and body. There was a whole herd of walkers heading our way.

And they weren't stopping.

❃

Words: 2492
Published: 24th October 2016

I'm assuming most of you have seen the latest episode. If you haven't stop reading now because spoilers...

I am actually destroyed.

I love Glenn so much and he didn't deserve to die in such a brutal way. That was actually the hardest episode to watch and like I haven't even recovered.

Glenn was my favourite from day one and I loved him as an individual and him and Maggie together so much I'm so upset 😭

I'm highkey mad at Daryl, though I'm not gonna go into that right now. But wow yeah, that was a rough episode and I'm here for all you Glenn fans broken by it. I'm probably gonna be sad about it forever tbh 💔

Lots of love to you all x