CHAPTER TEN » GONE
"There's always hope."

♔

"Morning."

I chuckled, watching as a very likely hungover Rick headed over to the table.

"Are you hungover?" Carl innocently replied, causing Lori's eyes to widen. "Mom said you would be."

Rick sat down across from me. "Mom is right."

"Mom has that annoying habit." I heard Lori mutter.

"Eggs!" T-Dog's voice rang out. "Powdered, but- but I do em good."

Glenn moaned, placing his hand on his forehead. I snorted, watching my friend's pain in mild amusement.

"I bet you can't tell." T-Dog said as he poured some onto Glenn's plate. "Protein helps the hangover."

Glenn moaned and I chuckled again.

A rattle from Rick sounded and I looked over to see him holding pain medication in his hand. "Where'd all this come from?"

"Jenner." Lori answered.

"Could you help me, please?" He handed the bottle over for her to open.

"Yeah." Lori started to twist the bottle cap. "He thought we could use it." She glanced up at Glenn. "Some of us at least."

Glenn groaned. "Don't ever let me drink again."

"Hey." We all looked up to see a rough looking Shane walk in.

Rick smirked. "Feel as bad as I do?"

"Worse." Shane mumbled, heading over to the coffee pot. I frowned, noticing as scratch on his neck.

"The hell happened to you?" T-Dog asked, obviously noticing the scratch too. Shane turned to him questioningly. "Your neck."

"I must have done it in my sleep."

He sat down beside me and I glanced up at his neck. Three, dark, dried bloodied nail scratches.

Rick narrowed his eyes at his best friend. "Never seen you do that before."

"Me neither." I saw him glance over at Lori, who seemed to be avoiding his gaze. I frowned, watching the two of them.

"Morning." I turned around, noticing Jenner walking over to us. He headed to the coffee pot and poured some for himself.

"Hey, Doc." Shane said, a few others chiming in and replying too.

"Doctor." Dale spoke up. "I don't mean to spam you with questions first thing-"

"But you will anyway."

"We didn't come here for the eggs." Andrea said bluntly.

~

"Give me playback of TS-19." Jenner stated, pushing a couple of buttons.

"Playback of TS-19."

Jenner turned back to face us. "Few people ever got a chance to see this." The screen was showing an X-ray of a head in different positions. "Very few."

"Is that a brain?"

Jenner looked over at Carl with a smile. "An extraordinary one. Not that it matters in the end. Take us in for E.I.V."

"Enhanced internal view."

The screen changed and zoomed in on the brain. It turned the body and showed it at a new sideways angle. Light flickered where the brain was, making it all colourful.
It was entrancing, like watching a colourful explosion of fireworks.

"What are those lights?" Shane asked.

"It's a person's life." Jenner replied. "Experiences, memories. It's everything. Somewhere in all that organic wiring, all those ripples of light, is you. The thing that makes you unique." He explained. "And human."

Daryl stared at him, obviously clueless. "You don't make sense ever?"

"Those are synapses." Jenner continued, pointing at the screen. "Electric impulses in the brain that carry all the messages. They determine everything a person says does or thinks from the moment of birth to the moment of death."

"Death?" Rick asked, walking closer to him. "That's what this is, a vigil?"

"Yes. Or rather the playback of the vigil."

"This person died?" Andrea frowned. "Who?"

"Test subject 19." Jenner answered. "Someone who was bitten and infected. And volunteered to have us record the process. Vi, scan forward to the first event." He instructed.

"Scanning to first event."

It zoomed out, showing the side of the head. There weren't as many lights now. In fact, there was a dark patch in the centre of the brain.

"What is that?" I asked, curiosity getting the better of me.

"It invades the brain like meningitis." The lights started to flicker and go out. Darkness evaded it. "The adrenal glands hemorrhage, the brain goes into shutdown, then the major organs. Then death. Everything you ever were or ever will be. Gone."

"Is that what happened to Jim?" Sophia looked at her mom.

"Yes." Carol replied.

I saw Andrea shift behind me and looked over, noticing how she was trying to hold back tears.

"She lost somebody two days ago." Lori spoke up. "Her sister."

Jenner took a couple of steps towards Andrea, speaking gently. "I lost somebody too. I know how devastating it is." He looked up to the alarm system. "Scan to the second event."

"Scanning to second event."

"The resurrection times vary wildly. We had reports of it happening in as little as three minutes. The longest we heard of was eight hours. In the case of this patient, it was two hours, one minute and seven seconds."

"It restarts the brain?" Lori queried.

"No, just the brain stem." Jenner corrected. "Basically, it gets them up and moving."

"But they're not alive?"

Jenner turned to Rick. "You tell me."

"It's nothing like before. Most of that brain is dark."

"Dark, lifeless, dead." Jenner nodded. "The frontal lobe, the neocortex, the human part... That doesn't come back. The you part. Just a shell driven by mindless instinct."

The jaw of the person started to move before something came into view, pointing at its head. A thin, black line was drawn through the head and brain.

"God." Carol muttered. "What was that?"

I took a step forwards, realising what had happened. "He shot his patient in the head." I said, before turning to Jenner. "Didn't you?"

He ignored me. "Vi, power down the main screen and the workstations."

"Powering down main screen and workstations."

Everything shut off, leaving us with minimal light.

"You have no idea what it is, do you?" Andrea questioned.

"It could be microbial, viral, parasitic, fungal."

"Or the wrath of God?" Jacqui said, her voice shaking.

"There is that."

"Somebody must know something." Andrea said. "Somebody somewhere."

"There are others, right? Other facilities?" Carol asked.

"There may be some. People like me."

"But you don't know?" Rick looked at him skeptically. "How can you not know?"

"Everything went down." Jenner stated. "Communications, directives. All of it. I've been in the dark for almost a month."

"So it's not just here. There's nothing left anywhere?" Andrea asked, her voice borderline panicky. "Nothing? That's what you're really saying, right?"

Jenner stared at her, expressionless. He really didn't know anything about it.

"Jesus." Jacqui mumbled.

"Man, I'm gonna get shit-faced drunk again." Daryl commented.

"Dr. Jenner, I know this has been taxing for you and I hate to ask one more question, but-" Dale paused, eyeing a clock on the wall. There were neon red numbers up lit up and counting down. 1:00:00 was lit up at the moment. "That clock. It's counting down. What happens at zero?"

"The-" he paused. "Basement generators. They run out of fuel."

"And then?" Rick asked. Jenner didn't respond, he just walked out of the room. "Vi, what happens when the power runs out?"

"When the power runs out, facility-wide decontamination will occur."

"Decontamination?" Glenn frowned. "What does that mean?"

~

"Emergency lighting on."

The lights shut off. My breathing became laboured as my eyes were only meeting darkness. To say I was terrified, was an understatement.

"Why is the air off?" Carol asked.

"And the lights in our room?" Lori added.

Daryl stepped out of his room, a bottle in his hand. "What's going on? Why is everything turned off?"

"Energy use is being prioritized." Jenner said, walking past and grabbing the bottle from Daryl, taking a sip.

"Air isn't a priority?" I asked, finally finding my voice. "And lights?"

"It's not up to me. Zone 5 is shutting itself down."

We all started to follow him down the hall, Daryl very impatiently. "Hey! Hey, what the hell does that mean? Hey man, I'm talking to you. What do you mean it's shutting itself down? How can a building do anything?"

"You'd be surprised."

Lori looked over the railing at the others below.

"Rick?"

"Jenner, what's happening?" I heard him reply.

"The system is dropping all the nonessential uses of power. It's designed to keep the computers running to the last possible second. That started as we approached the half-hour mark. Right on schedule."

We reached the lab. The clock read 00:31:27.

"It was the French."

"What?" Andrea frowned.

"They were the last ones to hold out, as far as I know." Jenner replied. "While our people were bolting out the doors and committing suicide in the hallways, they stayed in the labs till the end. They thought they were close to a solution."

"What happened?" Jacqui questioned.

"The same thing that's happening here. No power grid. Ran out of juice. The world runs of fossil fuel. I mean, how stupid is that?"

Jenner started to walk away and Shane bolted after him. "Let me tell you-"

"To hell with it, Shane." Rick said, stopping Shane from getting to Jenner. "I don't even care. Lori, grab our things. Everybody, get your stuff. We're getting out of here now!"

People started shuffling to grab their things but I was stopped by an alarm blaring.

"What's that?" Shane asked.

The screen suddenly lighted up showing 00:30:00.

"30 minutes to decontamination."

"Doc, what's going on here?" Daryl demanded.

There was no reply from Jenner.

"Everybody, y'all heard Rick. Get your stuff and let's go!" Shane yelled to everyone. "Go now! Go! Let's go!"

Everyone did as instructed, running to their rooms. There was then a whir and a clang. It sounded like a metal shutter.
My eyes widened as I turned around. We'd been locked in. Rick slammed his hand on the door. It felt like the whole world had closed in around us.

"Did you just lock us in?" Glenn exclaimed, his eyes full of panic. Jenner ignored him and sat back down, pressing another button. "He just locked us in!"

"Oh my god." My voice cracked as I struggled to hold it together. I felt someone's hand slip into mine and I turned to face Glenn.

"We've hit the 30-minute window. I am recording."I snapped my head over to look at Jenner, who was talking into a camera.

"Carl!" Lori yelled out as a fearful looking Carl ran into her arms.

"Mom!"

"You son of a bitch." Daryl snapped, launching himself at Jenner.

"Shane!" Rick pointed at his best friend, who reached over to pull Daryl back.

"You let us out of here!"

"No, stop. Don't!" Shane tried to restrain Daryl.

"You lying-"

T-Dog legged it over and put himself between Jenner and Daryl, who was actually holding up a bottle, ready to throw at the doctor.

"No no no no! Wait, no! No, don't do it."

I squeezed Glenn's hand tighter and he moved closer to me. My heart was beating insanely fast as I watched the frenzy going on around me.

Rick stormed over to the doctor. "Hey, Jenner, open that door now."

"There's no point. Everything topside is locked down. The emergency exits are sealed."

"Well, open the damn things."

"That's not something I control. The computers do. I told you once that front door closed, it wouldn't open again. You heard me say that. It's better this way." Jenner insisted.

"What is?" Rick seethed, looking at the clock. "What happens in 28 minutes?" Jenner ignored him, turning back to his computer.

"What the hell happens in 28 minutes!" I yelled, my whole body shaking in either fear or rage; maybe both.

"Come on!"

"You know what this place is?!" Jenner got into Rick's face before turning to Shane. "We protected the public from very nasty stuff! Weaponized smallpox! Ebola strains that could wipe out half the country! Stuff you don't want getting out! Ever!" He shouted, making echoes in the dead silence that hung over the room. He looked around at everyone before straightening his lab coat. "In the event of a catastrophic power failure- in a terrorist attack, for example - H.I.T.s are deployed to prevent any organisms from getting out."

"H.I.T.s?"

"Vi, define."

"HITS. High impulse thermobaric fuel-air explosives consists of a two-stage aerosol ignition that produces a blast wave of significantly greater power and duration than any other known explosive except nuclear."

"Oh my god." I heard Carol cry.

I clutched on to Glenn, trying to process what Vi was saying.
We were going to be burned alive.

"The vacuum-pressure effect ignites the oxygen between 5,000° and 6,000° and is used when the greatest loss of life and damage to structures is desired."

"It sets the air on fire. No pain. An end to sorrow, grief. Regret. Everything."

"Open the damn door!"

I spun around upon hearing glass smashing.

"Out of my way!" Shane was running towards the door, an axe in his hand.

"Daryl!" He chucked him another axe and both men pounded on the door.

"You should've left well enough alone. It would've been so much easier." Jenner said.

"Easier for who?" Lori snapped.

"All of you. You know what's out there. A short, brutal life and an agonizing death. Your- your sister." He turned to Andrea. "What was her name?"

"Amy."

"Amy." Jenner quietly repeated. "You know what this does. You've seen it. Is that really what you want for your wife and son?" He looked up at Rick.

"I don't want this."

Shane came over, panting. "Can't make a dent."

"Those doors are designed to withstand a rocket launcher." Jenner pointed out.

"Well, your head ain't!" Daryl held up the axe, ready to swing it at Jenner.

Everybody started to restrain him.

"Woah! Daryl! Daryl! Just back up! Back up!"

T-Dog took the pickaxe from his hand.

Jenner turned to Rick. "You do want this. Last night you said you knew it was just a matter of time before everybody you loved was dead."

"What?" Shane turned to his best friend in disbelief. "What? You really said that? After all your big talk?"

"I had to keep hope alive, didn't I?"

"There is no hope. There never was." Jenner said.

Tears pricked in my eyes, as I turned to address him. "There's always hope."

Rick nodded, turning to the man. "Maybe it won't be you, maybe not here, but somebody somewhere."

"What part of 'everything is gone' do you not understand?" Andrea suddenly snapped.

"Listen to your friend." Jenner spoke up. "She gets it. This is what takes us down. This is our extinction event."

I looked at the clock, which was still counting down; getting closer and closer to zero. I swallowed the lump in my throat. I didn't want to die. Not like this. I wanted to survive. I had to survive.

"This isn't right." Carol shook her head. "You can't just keep us here."

Jenner leaned forwards. "One tiny moment. A millisecond. No pain."

"My daughter doesn't deserve to die like this."

"Wouldn't it be kinder, more compassionate to just hold your loved ones and wait for the clock to run down?"

A gun cocked and we all simultaneously spun around.

"Shane, no!"

Shane was pointing a gun right at Jenner. Rick stepped in front of him.

"Out of the way, Rick. Stay out of my way! Open that door or I'm gonna blow your head off. Do you hear me?!"

"Brother, brother, this is not the way you do this." Rick lowered his voice. "We will never get out of here."

"Shane, you listen to him." Lori said sternly.

"It's too late. He dies, we all- we all die!"

Shane swung the gun up from Jenner's head to the security system. There was a loud bang and sparks flew. He continued to shoot, firing at everything around him.

"Shane! Shane!" Rick was trying to wrestle the gun out of his hand. Eventually, he elbowed him, knocking him to the ground. "Are you done now? Are you done?"

"Yeah, I guess we all are." Shane sneered.

Rick turned back to Jenner. "I think you're lying."

"What?"

"You're lying about no hope. If that were true, you'd have bolted with the rest or taken the easy way out. You didn't. You chose the hard path. Why?"

"It doesn't matter."

"It does matter. It always matters. You stayed when others ran. Why?"

"Not because I wanted to. I made a promise. To her. My wife."

"Test subject 19 was your wife?"

"She begged me to keep going as long as I could. How could I say no. She was dying. It should've been me on that table. I wouldn't have mattered to anybody. She was a loss to the world. Hell, she ran this place. I just worked here. In our field, she was an Einstein. Me? I'm just Edwin Jenner. She could've done something about this. Not me."

"Your wife didn't have a choice." Rick pointed out. "You do. That's- that's all we want. A choice. A chance."

"Let us keep trying as long as we can." Lori croaked, her eyes filled with tears.

"I told you topside's locked down. I can't open those."

He walked around Rick and typed something on his computer. The doors opened immediately.

"Come on!" Daryl yelled, beckoning everyone over.

"Move it! Come on, let's go!"

I picked up my bag, slinging it over my shoulder. Adrenaline coursed through my body and I grabbed Glenn's arm, pulling him along with me as we ran.
It was all a blur as we ran to the exit.
When we reached the others, T-Dog was shoving the door but it wasn't budging.

"Get them doors open!"

I ran over to the door, pounding on it, shaking it. Trying to break it open. "Come on!" I yelled out in frustration.

"It doesn't work!" Glenn exclaimed frantically.

"Wait a minute! Wait a minute!" T-Dog went to a password key on the wall and started typing in random numbers. "Try it! Try it! Try it now!"

"Dog, get down! Get down!" Shane fired a gun at the glass but it didn't shatter. It didn't even make a crack. "Jesus."

Carol stuck her hand into her bag. "Rick, I have something that might help."

"Carol, I don't think a nail file's gonna do it."

"Your first morning at camp, when I washed your uniform I found this in your pocket." She held out a grenade. Rick stared at it for a moment before taking it in his hand.

"Holy shit." I muttered, grabbing Glenn and pulling him backwards with me.

"Look out!" Rick screamed. "Get down! Get down!"

Everyone immediately dropped to the ground. I curled up, covering my head with my hands.
The grenade went off and vibrations were sent all through my body as the room shook beneath me. The glass shattered, now becoming a big gaping hole where the window used to be.
I picked myself up and headed outside, feeling mildly relieved when my feet touched the ground outside.
Walkers, which must have been attracted by the explosion, were coming towards us and I immediately pulled out my gun to start shooting.
Glenn pulled open the RV door and ushered us all inside.

"Wait wait wait. Wait wait. They're coming!" I heard Lori cry.

I glanced up out of the window, noticing Andrea and Dale running out of the building. Rick slammed his hand down on the horn. The building was about to blow.

"Dale, get down! Down!" Lori screamed out of the window.

Rick started moving us all to the back of the RV. "Get back! Everybody down!" He yelled. "Down! Get down!"

I dropped to the floor beside Glenn, taking his hand in mine. I squeezed my eyes shut, preparing for the explosion.
I heard a bang. Glass shattering. It was like an atomic bomb going off. The RV shook slightly with momentum.

The others had got up again and were opening the doors for Andrea and Dale.

"Come on. Get in, get in, get in."

Rick sat back in the drivers seat, starting the RV up. I numbly made my way to the couch, sitting beside Glenn.
I shared a brief pained look with him, before resting my head on his shoulder.

The RV started moving and I stared out of the window, watching the world go by.

❃

Words: 3411
Published: 14th February 2016

Firstly, happy Valentine's Day ❤️
Secondly, I finally got round to finishing writing season 1! I'm really happy with where this is going at the moment and the feedback I'm getting from you guys is so great.
However, the pressure has really started to pile on at school and a lot of my spare time is now being taken up by revision and preparing my coursework. Consequently, I'm finding that I have less and less time to write - which is why my updates have been almost monthly recently.

I feel like I've now left this at a good place to say that I'm going to be taking a break. I don't know how long for but I will get back into writing it as soon as I can.
I hope you can understand this and I'd really appreciate if you guys don't keep commenting asking for updates - not that I really get that on this book anyway.

Thank you all for your wonderful comments and support for this book and Glenn and Blaire. I have big plans for them and can't wait to get back into writing them again.

Okay, and I'm super excited about the walking dead coming back tonight/tomorrow (I hate timezones.) And i'm going to walker stalker con in exactly a week so my February is twd af right now.

Anyway, thank you all for reading. I love you lots . 💜