CHAPTER EIGHT » GOODBYES
"I can't have you mad at me, B."

♔

I wiped a bead of sweat from my forehead, watching as Daryl and Morales started to drag the body of one of our people to the fire.

"Hey, wait!" I shouted.

"What are you guys doing?" Glenn asked. "This is for geeks. Our people go over there."

"What's the difference? They're all infected." Daryl replied.

"Our people go in that row over there. We don't burn them!" Glenn shouted, tears visible in his eyes. "We bury them!" His voice cracked. I knew he was holding back tears. "Understand? Our people go in that row over there."

Morales and Daryl started to drag the body over to where Glenn had directed.

I turned to my best friend.

"Hey, are you okay?"

"I'm fine." He said bluntly.

"Glenn, is this about what happened in Atlanta? I'm sorry I snapped at you like that but you've gotta understand-"

"It's not that."

"What is it then?"

"Okay, it is about Atlanta."

I sighed. "Glenn-"

"No. You were right. You chose me. You risked your life for me. I know they had me held captive in a nursing home but things could have been a lot worse. I was so inconsiderate. I didn't think the plan through and look what happened."

"Yeah, things could have been worse." I said. "But they weren't."

He shook his head. "I don't want you risking your life for me. I don't deserve that."

I shook my head, stepping closer to my best friend. "Glenn, do you remember when we first found the camp?"

"Vaguely."

"It had been just me and you for so long. And when we found everyone else, you told me something. You told me that no matter what, we'd have each other's backs all the time. Even in a group like this. If one of us was in trouble, the other would always go back for them. Would never give up."

Glenn sighed, running a hand through his hair.

"I know. But things have changed now."

"What do you mean things have changed? Is this about Rick being here now?"

"This has nothing to do with Rick."

"Then why can't you tell me!"

"Because-" he paused. "Because it doesn't matter, okay? Just drop it."

He walked off but I was too numb to walk after him.

~

"I still think it's a mistake not burning these bodies." Daryl stated. "It's what we said we'd do, right? Burn 'em all, wasn't that the idea?"

"At first." Shane said.

"The Chinaman gets all emotional, says it's not the thing to do, we just follow him along?" Daryl asked.

"He's Korean." I pointed out, for what felt like the billionth time. "And he was right. It was the decent thing to do."

"You people need to know who the hell's in charge here, what the rules are!" Daryl snapped.

"There are no rules." Rick said.

"Well, that's a problem." Lori spoke up. "We haven't had one minute to hold onto anything of our old selves. We need time to mourn and we need to bury our dead." She said. "It's what people do."

So that's what we did. We held a funeral.

It was as nice as a burial service could be in this kind of world.

But it still broke my heart seeing everybody this way. I thought we were safe. I never expected to lose people so quickly.

I played with the necklace Glenn gave me, thinking over our recent arguments. I didn't want to be mad at him anymore. I wanted to hold on to him because honestly, he was the only thing keeping me going.

"Hey." I felt a hand on my shoulder but I didn't turn around. "I'm sorry."

I knew it was Glenn.

"I screwed up. I know, I did. But I don't want you to be mad at me, B. You're my best friend."

I turned around to face Glenn with a sigh.

"Apology accepted."

He smiled, wrapping his arms around me and pulling me into a big hug.

"I'm sorry for being an idiot earlier." He said. "I just want to protect you. Please understand."

"It's okay." I offered a smile. "I understand."

~

Rick had proposed the idea of moving along to a place called the CDC yesterday.

He managed to convince me. I mean, there's nothing left for us here anymore. We might as well check the place out. If there's any hope for any of us, then it's there.

Shane had managed to be convinced last night, and so most people decided to go along with the idea too.

"Everybody listen up. Those of you with CB's, we're gonna be on channel 40." Shane instructed. "Let's keep the chatter down, okay? Now you got a problem, don't have a CB, can't get a signal or anything at all, you're gonna hit your horn one time. That'll stop the caravan. Any questions?"

"We're, uh- we're- we're not going." Morales spoke up.

"We have family in Birmingham. We want to be with our people." Miranda explained.

"You go on your own, you won't have anyone to watch your back." Shane pointed out.

"We'll take the chance." Morales said. "I got to do what's best for my family."

"You sure?" Rick double checked.

"We talked about it. We're sure."

"All right." Rick nodded. "Shane?"

"Yeah, all right."

"357?" Rick questioned.

Shane nodded. "Yeah."

Rick handed Morales a gun and Shane handed him ammo.

"The box is half full." Shane said.

"Thank you all. For everything." Miranda smiled.

I pulled Morales into a hug.

"I'm gonna miss you buddy." I said.

"I'm gonna miss you too, not your sarcasm though."

I laughed, feeling my eyes welling up with tears.

I liked Morales. He was one of the first people in the group to make me feel welcome.

"Good luck."

"You too, Blaire. Take care."

The family said goodbye to the others.

"Channel 40 if you change your minds. All right?" Rick reminded.

"Yeah."

We watched Morales, Miranda and the kids leave.

"What makes you think our odds are any better?" Shane asked. "Come on. Let's go. Let's move out."

~

En route to the CDC, the RV's radiator hose decided to burst. Just our luck.

"I told you we'd never get far on that hose. I said I needed the one from the cube van." Dale said.

"Can you jury-rig it?" Rick asked.

"That's all it's been so far. It's more duct tape than hose." Dale replied. "And I'm out of duct tape."

Shane looked into the distance. "I see something up ahead. A gas station if we're lucky."

Jacqui hopped out of the RV, a worried look on her face.

"Y'all, Jim... It's bad. I don't think he can take anymore."

During the attack last night, Jim had been bitten. That was part of the reason we were heading to the CDC. To find a cure.

"Hey, Rick, you want to hold down the fort? I'll drive ahead, see what I can bring back." Shane said.

"Yeah, I'll come along too and I'll back you up." T-Dog added.

"Y'all keep your eyes open now. We'll be right back." Shane promised before leaving with T-Dog.

Rick turned to me with a sigh. "Blaire, can you try and keep everyone calm whilst I speak to Jim?"

"Sure thing."

I sighed and watched as Rick headed into the RV.

"What's up?" Glenn asked. Then he pulled a face, probably regretting what he just said.

"Did you seriously just ask that?"

"Yeah. Um, I meant are you okay?"

"Just peachy."

"Blaire, are you still mad?"

"At you?" I asked. He nodded. "No. At the world? Yes."

"You worried about the CDC?"

"I'm worried about everything, Glenn. I just don't know if we're all gonna make it there. And what happens if we don't find anything? We'll be stranded."

"I trust Rick." Glenn said.

"So do I. But I've been thinking about it and something just doesn't seem right anymore."

~

"It's what he says he wants." Rick said, after informing everyone about Jim wanting to be left behind.

"And he's lucid?" Carol asked.

"He seems to be." Rick answered. "I would say yes."

"Back in the camp, when I said Daryl might be right and you shut me down, you misunderstood." Dale said. "I would never go along with callously killing a man. I was just gonna suggest that we ask Jim what he wants. And I think we have an answer."

"We just leave him here? We take off?" Shane shook his head. "Man, I'm not sure I could live with that."

Lori breathed in deeply. "It's not your call, either one of you."

It was decided.

And not long after our group conversation, Rick and Shane were carrying Jim to a nearby tree.

"Yeah. That's it." Rick said as they sat him down.

"Hey, another damn tree." Jim chuckled.

"Hey, Jim. I mean-" he tried again. "You know, it doesn't need to be this." Shane said. I could see this was hurting him. That he knew this was the wrong thing to do.

"No. It's good." Jim smiled. "The breeze feels nice."

"Okay. All right."

"Just close your eyes, sweetie."
Jacqui said. "Don't fight." She bent down and kissed him on the cheek.

Rick took out a gun and held it out to him. "Jim, do you want this?"

"No. You'll need it. I'm okay." He reassured. "I'm okay."

Dale came over. "Oh. Hey. Thanks for, uh, for fighting for us."

"Okay."

I didn't know what to say. I was speechless. All I could do was smile sadly, nod my head and leave.

~

I felt someone shaking my shoulder and I groaned, opening my eyes.

"We're pretty much here." Glenn smiled. "Thought I'd wake you up earlier because I know how moody you are when you first get up."

"Shut up, Glenn."

He chuckled. "My point exactly."

Shortly afterwards, the caravan came to a stop outside a huge, impressive building.

We all stepped out of our cars and quietly approached the building.

It was like a ghost town here. There were hundreds of corpses on the floor, as well as a swarm of flies.

The putrid smell made me want to gag.

"All right, everybody. Keep moving. Go on. Stay quiet. Let's go." Shane ushered us forwards. "Okay, keep moving. Stay together."

"Keep moving. Come on." Rick encouraged.

I followed him, stepping over the lifeless bodies of walkers.

There were several shushes thrown about as we headed closer to the building.

"Oh, God." Glenn muttered.

"Keep it together. Come on." Shane said.

Lori was reassuring Carl and I gave her a supportive smile.

We reached the entrance to the building.

All of the doors were locked.

"Nothing?" Shane asked, pounding on the door with his fist.

"There's nobody here." T-Dog stated.

"Then why are these shutters down?" I asked.

"Walkers!" Daryl exclaimed. I spun around, noticing a lone walker heading towards us. Daryl loaded his crossbow and shot it in the head. "You led us into a graveyard!"

"He made a call." I defended.

"It was the wrong damn call!" Daryl yelled.

"Just shut up. You hear me?" Shane snapped. "Shut up. Shut up!" He turned around to face Rick. "Rick, this is a dead end."

"Where are we gonna go?" Jacqui asked, fear written all over her face.

"Do you hear me? No blame."

"She's right." Lori's eyes darted between Rick and Shane. "We can't be here this close to the city after dark."

"Fort Benning, Rick." Shane pointed out. "Still an option."

"On what?" Andrea asked. "No food, no fuel. That's 100 miles."

"125." Glenn corrected. "I checked the map."

"Forget Fort Benning." Lori said. "We need answers tonight, now."

"We'll think of something." Rick reassured.

"Come on, let's go. Let's get out of here." Shane pleaded. "Let's go. Please. All right, everybody back to the cars. Let's go. Move."

"The camera." Rick said. "It moved."

Everyone froze, looking back at him.

Shane shook his head. "You imagined it."

"It moved. It moved."

"Rick, it is dead, man. It's an automated device. It's gears, okay?" Shane explained. "They're just winding down. Now come on. Man, just listen to me. Look around this place. It's dead, okay? It's dead. You need to let it go, Rick."

I shared a look with Daryl, who was aiming his crossbow at the approaching geeks.

My chest was heaving as panic started to set in.

I raised my gun, knowing that we were going to have to fight our way out of this herd of walkers.

Rick slammed on the shutters.

"Rick, there's nobody here!" Lori exclaimed.

"I know you're in there. I know you can hear me!" Rick yelled.

Shane looked at me and I nodded, lowering my gun and reaching for Rick's arm, to help drag him away.

"Everybody get back to the cars now!" Shane commanded.

Rick looked up at the camera desperately. "Please, we're desperate. Please help us. We have women, children, no food, hardly any gas left!"

"Rick. There's nobody here." I seethed, trying to pull him away.

"We have nowhere else to go!"

He frantically pounded on the door.

"Keep your eyes open!"

I looked behind me, noticing how close the walkers were getting now.

"If you don't let us in, you're killing us! Please!"

"Come on, buddy, let's go." Shane tried pulling him back again. "Let's go!"

"Please help us. You're killing us! You're killing us!" Rick screamed. "You're killing us!"

We managed to pry Rick away from the door and were just about to leave when there was a loud noise from behind us.

I slowly turned around.

The was a clang, a bang and a hiss.

Light poured out into the darkness.

The doors had opened.

❃

Words: 2289
Published: 6th January 2016

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