I was supposed to write this yesterday but by the time I finished my homework I was so tired that I washed my hair four times in the shower before realizing it.

Anyway so my life is kinda crappy, so that hasn't changed. Also I realized that the last time I posted before leaving I said I was going to an audition and then I never told u guys what happened, so I'll tell you now.

( you guys probably won't understand any of this if you've never been in a ballet audition, but try your best to understand and ask me if you don't don't get it)

Ok so the part I was really hoping for was mint. The costumes are so pretty, you get a flat tutu and you get to wear pointe shoes and the choreography is great and I really wanted to do it. I didn't get it tho :( it sucks bc in the dance you need 8 people. And in the audition the teacher who was choosing has to tell a few people to put their pointe shoes on so he can see who should be a mint. But he only chose 6 people (and I wasn't one of them) and it really pissed me off bc he didn't give me a chance. It's my 5th year on pointe and I'm strong on pointe and I was p disappointed. And it turns out that he only told six people to put their shoes on bc he chose two girls who WERENT EVEN AT THE AUDITION to be a mint. And the two girls didn't even want to do it, that's why they didn't audition, but now they have to do it anyways. wtf I would be glad to take their spot. And there's also the height thing and I'm not even five foot so that may have contributed to his decision. So anyway I was p bummed, but the audition wasn't over bc you could still be a chef. And I was a chef last year and I liked it and I thought for sure I could get it, so I tried super hard and in the end I didn't even get picked to be a chef. The worst part is that almost all the chefs who got picked were younger and in a lower level than me. It made me feel really shitty. And they said to come back for the next audition so I could try to be a soldier or a rat. Lol if I was a rat I would drop out like fuck that. Anyways I did the audition and I'm a soldier and ig I'm glad that I at least got in, but I was on the verge of tears. Cuz I wasn't even stressed, I thought I'd at least be a chef and the fact that everyone who got in was in a lower level than me made it even worse. And I felt bad bc there are some people who got rat and some people didn't get in, and I was holding back tears bc I'm a soldier. So I felt like shit about the audition and I felt like shit about feeling like shit. I really wish they had let me try. Anyway wtv I shouldn't beat myself up about it, I'm gonna have fun anyway.

In other news, you guys remember the creepy Caillou guy from my previous story that always makes me feel awkward? (His hair grew out so he doesn't look like Caillou anymore, but that's what I'm calling him for the sake of the story) mkay well you know what happened?? I was just standing outside, talking to my friend, and I felt water on my hand. And I asked if she sprayed her water bottle on me (cuz she has a button on her water bottle to spray mist) and she said "no I think he just spat on you" and O H M Y G O D i was laughing but also crying. Like their were actual tears I was so disgusted. I washed my hands fifty times. I was so grossed out and I still am and UGH wtf is this guys problem like is he mentally reatarded? Who tf does shit like that wtf man. And today in the hall I was walking and I felt smt in my hair and I turned around and no one was there, so I kept walking. And then it happened again and I turned around and saw him hide behind his friend and I was like "ok???" And then he did it again and tried to hide but he failed and I saw him and he didn't even react, he was just staring at the wall pretending I didn't see him. He has mental problems wtf dude. Also he cut his hair and it's even uglier now I can't handle it it's so bad. I'll try to take a sneaky pic but I'm not subtle so maybe not. Anyway so yeah this guy is weirding me out I want a restraining order.

Oh and in science yesterday I was so fucking happy. I got in class and I saw that we had a sub and the sub turned around and it was my old English teacher!!! In all of my 14 years of life, she was my favourite teacher. I had her for grade 7&8 but she got pregnant and left for a bit. Now she said she's subbing for this year and next year she's teaching full time and she said she's gonna try to get our class. when I saw that it was her I gasped audibly and I had tears in my eyes. I didn't realize how much I missed her until I saw her again like damn she was the best teacher, she was so sweet and I miss her. She told us that we were the first class that she ever taught at this school. She said she remembers cuz it was her first day and it was the first class in the morning and I feel so special. And she remembered us each by name and what sports we do and it made me so happy. So yeah that made my day :)

But in gym my teacher made yet another sexist comment. I don't remember exactly but he p much assumed me and my friend sucked at basketball bc we're girls. What happened is me and my friend went to play basketball and we were the only girls. And he told us to go in separate teams, and we asked him why and said that five guys on one team and three guys and two girls on the other "wasn't fair". And then I looked at him like are you fucking joking and then he said doubtfully "well, unless you're amazing in basketball..." And at this point I was so fucking done so I just went on the other team. The worst part is that I'm actually decent at basketball and I actually try when it comes to basketball, but I couldn't even prove myself bc I was sick, so I was sitting in the floor dying half the time. I really hate this teacher I wanna punch his face.

And lastly, I watched the tatinof movie trailers and AGHH im so fucking sad that I couldn't go see them, my heart h u r t s I was actually crying.

Here is an accurate reenactment of me watching the trailers:
(Srry the pics are pixely, my phone's camera is being all weird)

I'm gonna regret posting these.

Adios :)