Paper cut- Have you seen that one Studio C skit where they stick him in the money machine and he's like in so much pain? Yeah...

Pig- PIG STAMPEDE LET'S GO!

Plane crash- see car crash, but imagine it with a plane

Poison- back in the olden days when they thought putting mercury in someone's drink would help them (instead it killed them) so yeah, like that.

Pull apart- also in the olden days, as a form of torture, they would attach horses to each of their limbs, and then smack the horses, and then they would run... you can imagine what happened next.

Pulverize- to reduce to fine particles is the definition. So yeah.

Punch- punch punch punch enough and they're dead.

Push off a cliff- especially with sharp rocks and crocodiles (or alligators (and yes those are different animals)) at the bottom