"It's Valentine's Day tomorrow, baby. Who's the special one in your heart right now?"

"Special?" Above me the light flickered, and I was dazed for the littlest bit. Mom was looking at me with a slight smile as she chewed on our leftover lasagna and, suddenly serious, I looked down on my fairly empty plate. Special one, my Mom said... Besides Mom and Dad and my fish, Polly, there were currently two people I'd always liked to see every day.

"Wendy..." I nodded, fiddling with my fork. "And Red, of course."

The smile on my Mom's face widened, and she looked at Dad who was busy finishing his third cup of coffee. "Heard that, Tom?" I heard her say. Dad set his cup down and leaned forward a bit, staring me dead in the eyes. I stared hard, too, thinking it was a game.

"D'you want to give them gifts tomorrow, kiddo?" He fluffed up my hair, and my mouth quirked up, excitement flashing in my eyes as I looked for Mom.

"Could you help me write a letter, Mom?"

"Of course, honey." She kissed the top of my head and then all you could ever hear right then were my loud footsteps as I quickly rushed to my room upstairs, eager to write, eager to make something for my friends.

My favorite teacher, Mrs. Willard had already mentioned this "Valentine's Day" earlier, and what she said afterwards were a flurry of words I couldn't understand so I had to make use of my classmates' reactions for support. Surely, I saw the girls glancing at the boys and few boys making kissy faces, some even disgusted. Most were oblivious and confused, as was I, and when I saw Red and Wendy looking at me all three of us shared a big shrug, our contorted faces almost saying, "What are they getting excited about?"

I only got excited because I got to write letters; I liked pencils very much.

When Mom and I reached my room, she turned on the lights that sent illuminating planets and stars on the ceiling. I had this silliest grin on my face when I ransacked my book bag for the pencils and pieces of paper, and when I did I scrambled up my chair and put them on what my Dad called a "study table".

"Mom, what does 'Valentine's Day' mean?" I asked, not looking up as I slowly hovered the pencil over the paper and then sweeped it down, my then-shaky writing forming the words Dear Red on one piece and Dear Wendy on the other.

"It's a day when you express your love for someone, Andrew," came the answer from beside me.

Then I stopped and looked at Mom incredulously. "Love?" I had the biggest question mark laced in that word. "But I don't really love Wendy and Red, Mom. They're my friends."

"I know, sweetie. But friends do support each other, right? And they do that from love, and it's not the love you'd see from me and your Dad." Then came the words that had me so frustrated in the first... I don't know, nine years of my life. "You'll understand when you grow up."

"But I don't get it Mom." I didn't know and understand. I felt like crying that time.

"You could write the good things Red and Wendy do that make you smile, and then you'll tell them why you liked seeing them do it."

"So I could write anything?"

"Yes, sweetie, you could write anything you want to tell them."

"Mom... I don't need to love them like that, do I?" I sniffed.

Mom sighed. I could tell she was searching for the easiest explanation and obviously couldn't.

So instead, she ended up with "You'll see, baby. You'll see." and a kiss on the forehead which only made everything sound a lot more confusing and frustrating. After that she told me to take my time writing and that she'd just go downstairs and send Dad off to his work.

So I huffed out a frustrated breath, gripped my pencil hard, and got to work on my letter.

• • •

Red immediately passed me the ball when I got to the one small hoop we'd always had gathered around in since the last three months. I didn't catch it though since I had both hands on my letters, and Red - ever the calculative one - didn't once question my action. Instead he ran to the bouncing ball and walked up to me, gray eyes not leaving the papers between my fingers and palms.

"Those for Valentine's Day?" he asked in his usual quiet voice, dribbling away but not leaving my side. Wendy was also here, but she too was busy doing something I could not see and so wouldn't bother minding whatever it was that I had.

My mouth was agape. How did you know? was what my face told him and frankly, he instantly got the message. "I got you, Andrew," he said, finally looking me in the eyes. "I had something for you guys, too."

And then my eyes shone. I practically whispered at him in admiration, "That's cool. Can I see them now?"

"Sure."

So we ran to where Wendy sat, at a bench near the swings and at the side of the small hoop, and when we were just about to open our mouths she just had to back away and scream in her loudest voice: "Stop it! It's not ready yet!"

"What's not ready?" There it was again, the glittery amazement in my voice. I could almost crumple the letters if I wanted to from excitement... but I didn't want to. So instead of gripping them and wasting all my efforts from last night, I silently shook as I peeked at what she's holding behind her back.

Wendy continued to turn to whichever side so we wouldn't be able to see it, but judging by the atmosphere I knew she'd eventually give in.

"Ah." She stomped her foot at the concrete ground, but it didn't look like she was annoyed — it really looked like she'd given up. Then she held out her hands in front of us, waving two small, white boxes with red ribbons that still weren't tied. Once I'd stopped gaping at them and looked up to her face, she looked victorious with her blinding smile. "I forgot how to tie... But hey, I baked them. Mama helped me yesterday."

"You could bake?" came the question from Red and me.

"Uh-huh." Wendy didn't drop the smile and looked at us with confidence flooding in her eyes.

"Swell," Red commented, and when I looked at him he had this smallest smile on his face. "I baked for Andrew and you, too."

"You guys..." I whispered. I looked down at the letters in my hands then to their expectant faces.

Then I let the biggest grin settle on my face and proudly said, "You guys are so cool."

"Of course we are."

Unwarned and a split second later, they were already inspecting my letters in their hands. I was stunned. Red was silently reading the back of his envelope while Wendy's face was contorted in a flurry of emotions. "What are these?" she asked.

"I wrote them." I beamed, regaining myself instantly. "For Valentine's Day."

Wendy was ready to tear up the envelope but I stopped her just in time. "Don't open them yet!"

"Why?"

"Mom said letters should be read -" I looked around, then after confirming there weren't anyone with us, continued "- in private."

They were quiet, but I knew they were happy, if not from my gift then from the vibe of Valentine's Day.

In the letters I wrote how much I liked being friends with them, even got to play with my broken crayons when I drew the three of us in both pieces of paper. I didn't say I love them; that was for older people.

In my confused and young mind, I didn't even know what the heck 'love' means.

"Let's play ball?" Red suggested. With our big smiles, we all nodded and got up to play. On the benches sat my letters and the cookies from Red and Wendy on top so they won't be blown by the wind.

"What does love mean?"

"Hmm?" Red quirked his head at me just before he swung his hand and released the ball. I quickly shook my head and focused on the game, and then he didn't say anything as well afterwards.

Maybe love was the happiness you feel whenever you're with people.

'Cause if it was that, then I admit I do love Red and Wendy. I love them so much if that's what love meant.

And right now...

I still couldn't believe the naivety I once had. How it led to such bigger problems in the future, in this present.

I didn't know love could hurt you, that happiness you once gained.

I still was too stunned to accept that it'd hurt.

Love...

It could just fuck you up until you mess everything, won't it?

• • •

A/N: I wanted to post it now and I hadn't even given it a thorough once-over so if anything looks weird and if there's a mistake, please point them out. :D I really do hope you guys like it. For any constructive criticism, I'll try to digest and understand. :)