MOFFAT WAS a small town on Mirea's eastern coast known for two things: cheese, and a human population outnumbered by goats three to one. It was no surprise then, when the Celes dropped anchor along a secluded beach, and Sebbi took his first steps inside the town's borders that the roads were speckled with goat feces, the stench of wet fur clung to the air like a thick, unforgiving blanket, and the few spaces not occupied by braying goats were filled with cheese vendors offering samples of their finest works.

Stalls were full of glistening cheese wheels, sharp wedges, and platters of thinly sliced cheeses paired with spiced fruits, fresh marmalades, and cured, smoked meats. There were cheeses flecked with gold, splattered with honey, infused with coffee and cocoa and regional teas.

No wonder Margo always talked about visiting someday.

Sebbi hoped she would, hoped they all would. Alive, safe, happy and together.

The crew of the Celes, save Red, had gone on before him, securing rooms at the only inn, aptly named, The Curd. On the porch, a young, red-haired boy grimaced while shoveling goat poop from the steps.

Red frowned. "I've had to clean up messes, don't get me wrong, but this–" His nose crinkled, the beads laced throughout his beard, clinking together. "This is something else." He watched the lad, attending to his duties with pity in his eyes.

"Weren't you raised in a crowded orphanage?" Sebbi noticed Red holding his breath, the man's cheeks turning crimson as his brow wrinkled with his struggle.

Red wheezed. "Sure. Stank in the hot months. But this," he nodded toward the inn, the Wizard Kellog stepping onto the porch. The older Wizard smiled, and casually stepped around a goat who was in the process of making more work for the red-haired boy. "Body stink is nothing  compared to this."

"Afraid our ship's mechanic has quite the delicate nose." Captain Daphne strode over to them, first mate Nugura an extra shadow at her side. The two women had left to peruse the cheese stalls. The captain came back empty-handed, but to Sebbi's surprise, Nugura carried a bulging brown bag.

Red's frown worsened. He raised an arm, and scratched the back of his neck. "It's not that...I just..." Sebbi thought he heard a tremble in Red's voice. "Well, you all can't be unbothered by the stench." His eyes searched for an agreeing soul amongst them. 

Captain Daphne just chuckled.

Nugura reached into her bag, pulled out a wedge of white cheese and plopped it in her mouth. "Grew up on a farm." She bit down, severed cheese strings dangling limply from her lips.

"I've spent my fair share of time in dungeons," added Captain Daphne. "Nothing about them ever smells pleasant."

Red's gaze darted to Sebbi's. Sebbi was his last resort. But Sebbi, too, had smelled worse. Wet fur, sweat-slicked fur. Blood. Death. He shook his head and Red's face fell.

"Ah!"

They turned. The Wizard Kellog tapped his toes on the Curd's porch, pointing at a poster tacked to the inn's message board. "Look here!" A grin spread across his face. He stood a little straighter, seemed to stretch a little taller. "Hand-drawn, captures me perfectly." Sebbi squinted to make out the poster. It was indeed of the Wizard Kellog, advertising one of his magickal performances. The Wizard was in his signature cornflower blue suit, paired with a long, flowy matching blue scarf, studded with stars. "The lines, the angle of my jaw, the correct skin tone." He clapped his hands together, perfectly elated. "They even got the proper blue." He explained further that cornflower blue was a hard shade to obtain, as it didn't occur in nature. One had to mix the correct pigments, in precise amounts to achieve it. The work was laborious, though the outcome, he insisted, was exquisite. 

When he stopped talking, and walked toward their little group, Sebbi thought he was floating, his happiness making him airborne.

Red nudged Sebbi in the shoulder. "It's about a three day journey from here to Ean if you take the tram." He pointed at a measly trio of dying Burlas down the road. Behind them, peeked the painted red roof of the station. "You have enough for a ticket?"

Sebbi shook his head. "Gave what little I had to a friend." He glanced down, thinking of Bantu's warm wishes as he left them at the inn, and Uusa's clear embarrassment, even as he asserted he wouldn't miss Sebbi. He hoped he'd see them again someday. Maybe when Red captained his own ship, he could take Sebbi to visit them in Noriie. "To repay his kindness."

"The boy and his father, quite a pair." The Wizard smiled, and when Sebbi's eyebrows rose with an unanswered question, the Wizard added, almost preemptively, "Of course I know them. I know all my fans."

Red returned to their discussion of the tram. "No money?" He crossed his arms, fingers playing with the blue feather trim of his vest. "Then it's a two week walk, I suppose. Less if you run. Can maybe halve the distance if you cut through Mingare but–" He ran his gaze over Sebbi, and shook his head. "You don't look like you'd put up much of a fight for one of 'em beasts. You come across a monster, you're food."

Sebbi smirked. "I have teeth."

"Teeth sure, but you'd need fangs to do any real damage to the monsters roaming the Blood Plains. They were enhanced with magick, right?"

"So the rumors go."

"Quite true, Red," chimed in The Wizard. "Magickally mutated local wildlife, done under the crown's command, back in the early days of royal rule. Back when Laos was a refuge to the burgeoning religious sects of Mirea. The crown sought to make an obedient, unstoppable army to secure its borders, but so little did their mages know about the realm's magick, and so infallible they thought themselves and their techniques, they created massive failures and loosed them on Laos's hills. Whole parts of the city were destroyed. It wasn't until the zealots were thrown out and the crown's men were given orders to retreat, and the port was reclaimed by the sailors and merchant folk, that the walls were erected to keep the monsters at bay."

Sebbi blinked. "How do you know all this?"

"My boy," said the Wizard, mindlessly fluffing his pocket square full of stars, "I read."

Red whispered, "I ain't never read any books like that."

Sebbi hadn't either. He'd only heard tales of the Mingare monsters, and even then, he thought them made up, stories used to keep curious children from wandering into the blood plains and getting lost. They had certainly kept Abby from going beyond Laos's outer wall. He never considered they might be real, that monsters with enhanced speed and agility, and appetites for blood stalked the plains.

The Wizard glanced at the sky, then at the dark brown skin of his wrist. He tapped the flesh there, as if tapping the face of an invisible timepiece. "Tram will be here soon." He started toward the station. "We must get Mr. Tells aboard, lest he keeps his loved ones waiting." Turning his head, his eyes glimmering, he addressed Sebbi alone. "They've been waiting too long already, wouldn't you agree?"

Sebbi swallowed. Had they been waiting? Or had they moved on and would his returning only make things worse? Only upset the routine they'd established in his absence?

He died in Abby's arms, would she still use them to welcome him home? He'd caused so much trouble for Lucy, would Lucy willing accept him back, even though Sebbi was sure he'd continue to cause trouble?

"Hey, cat-man?"

Sebbi jolted and whipped around. Red, Captain Daphne, and Nugura formed a half-circle around him.

"Here." Red held out a small leather satchel, dyed scarlet. He tossed it to Sebbi and Sebbi caught it without issue, his reflexes still as good as any Aelurian's.

"What's this?" Sebbi turned the satchel over in his palm, feeling the rounded edges of coins beneath his fingers.

Captain Daphne stepped forward. "A little something for your troubles." She clapped him on the shoulder.

"What troubles?" Sebbi's gaze bounced to each of them. "You all took me on. Gave me a room. Fed me–"

Nugura held up a grease-stained hand. "You listened to Red and all his dumb stories."

At this, Red's lips slipped so low on his face, Sebbi thought his beard might devour them, if it was hungry enough.

"We've all heard them before," said Captain Daphne. Nugura nodded. "Nice stories, don't get me wrong, Red." Her eyes flicked to Red's face. The Celes's mechanic nodded sheepishly, color staining his cheeks. "But after about the thousandth time and being able to recite them from memory, it gets a little hard to keep on listening. You." Captain Daphne pointed at Sebbi. "Gave him a new pair of ears. And for that," her finger prodded the satchel, "we thank you."

Sebbi shifted. He felt like he was aboard the Celes, the wind current rocking the ship's hull. He had only been with the crew for a few weeks, and yet, they smiled at him like they were old friends.

After a few seconds, and the ground had grown solid again, Sebbi smiled too. The Celes's crew weren't like old friends, they were friends. He'd just hadn't realized it until then.

He slipped the satchel into his pocket, much to the Captain's pleasure. Nugura gave an approving grunt. Red pulled him into a side hug, the weight of Red's arm, coupled with his enthusiasm, threatening to squeeze the air from Sebbi's lungs. But the warmth was nice.

"Get yourself one of those fancy, private compartments, yeah?" Red released Sebbi, resting his hands on his belts. He wore three, as he always did, one a sturdy, worn strip of leather, off which hung his wrench, the other two, gold and braided, and just the gaudiest things Sebbi had ever seen. "Get sleep, cat-man. Look your best for that special someone of yours."

Heat exploded over Sebbi's face. "Ah–" He scratched his head, his hair, dried and caked in sweat and salt, scratching like bristles against his fingertips. "Will do."

"And come find us once you're good and settled." Red grinned. "Bring your special someone aboard the Celes."

Sebbi snorted. "If the Celes is still flying by then."

Red feigned hurt, his expression one of pain and delight. Fingers grazed the handle of his wrench. "It will be, I promise you that. The Celes will never stop flying these seas."

Red's words were filled with certainty, though Sebbi was doubtful. Parts of the Celes were always falling off and sinking into the ocean, after all.

"Mr. Tells–"

All four of them turned toward the Wizard Kellog. "It's time."

In the distance, the slick metal body of the Tram, sped along the track, headed for the station.

Sebbi took a step forward and breathed deep.

This was it. He was going home.

*

Sebbi paced the room. It was more spacious than he thought possible for a tram compartment. There was a padded bench beside a round window, a small bathroom, complete with a sink and a mirror. A small table, dressed with frilly lace and a vase of Mirthea, around which sat two chairs. Paintings of famous places across Mirea were tacked to the walls . He recognized a few - the hills of the Royal Back, the Dewlin frozen falls, and glass beaches in the south. He knew them from Abby's room, from the murals her dad had had painted across her ceiling.

When he was a cat he never understood why she'd lay on her back and stare up at them for hours. But his world had been small then, and he imagined, the same had been true for her.

A cat, he thought, glancing at his reflection in the mirror. He couldn't imagine his skin covered with fur, his ears on top of his head, instead of on the sides, his body small and lithe. A tail, integral to his balance, behind him, that picked up dirt and bugs and broken branches when he swept it across the ground. It felt like a lifetime ago.

Balling his hands at his sides, Sebbi moved to the mirror. He gripped the rim of the sink, and sighed.

Then, he stared at himself, his gold eyes, flecked with a muddy brown.

"Abby," he said, pretending the eyes that stared at him were her brighter, blue ones. "Hi." His adam's apple bobbed and something thick stuck in his throat. "How's it been?" He shrugged, and gave a smirk.

"No," he growled, head hung, shoulders slumping. "How awkward."

He straightened and tried again. "Abs, it's been awhile, yeah?" He raked his hands through his hair. "Turns out I'm not dead, so that's great...right?"

He gave another growl, spat a curse and stalked toward the bench. Gods, when had he gotten so bad at talking?

If Reven had been there, he'd have given Sebbi a book on etiquette for him to memorize by morning. If his brother had been there, he would have slapped Sebbi's back, and gently chastised him for being an idiot.

And if Abby had been there, she would have told him to quit trying so hard and to be himself.

But just who was he?

A cat? An Aelurian king? Or simply a boy, a boy who slouched against a bench, whose fingers twitched with the desire to claw the pillows to shreds, who wanted to see the people he cared about so much his heart ached? Whose heart hadn't stopped aching since he woke up in an unfamiliar forest, not dead, but alive, and unsure as to how.

He threw his hands up, before shoving them behind his head. He glanced up, sunlight on his face, heating his cheeks. A breeze from the open window played with his hair.

"How do I see them again, after everything that's happened?"

How do I muster up the courage to see them?

"Sebastian," he recalled the Wizard saying, as they both stood on the platform, waiting for the tram. "If you can't trust yourself, trust them."

Sebbi hadn't been sure he'd heard the Wizard, as the tram was pulling into the station, its brakes straining to slow the cars. 

The Wizard made no attempt to repeat himself. He simply smiled, and offered his hand. Sebbi took it. "Come visit me in Triad. I should be at my school, sorting a few things out, for a while."

Sebbi had thanked the Wizard for all he had done, and had gotten in line to board when the Wizard called out to him, one last time. "I hope she likes the ribbon." Then he'd turned, and was gone.

"If you can't trust yourself, trust them," Sebbi muttered, turning his head. Outside the window, the flatlands were blurring past, fields of wheat brown against green and yellow grasses waist high and swaying.

The tram was nothing like Ritz, the Tells' ancient AI carriage. He'd only rode on it a handful of times, mostly sneaking aboard to slink into the fish canneries along Laos's docks, and raid the storage bins of their freshly  deboned Jacquer fish. But there'd been one time, when he rode it, because he wanted to be closer to Abby, though in hindsight, he'd always just wanted to be closer to Abby, close to her like his brother was, but he'd never mustered up the courage to accept that truth.

The carriage had malfunctioned that day and created a blizzard with the cooling system. Abby had protected Lucy from the AI's arctic assault, and though Sebbi had been fine, his coat thick enough to keep him plenty warm in winter weather, he'd been jealous of Lucy, cradled and safe in Abby's arms.

Sebbi brought his arms in front of himself. His muscles twitched as he stretched his fingers. He could finally hold Abby for himself, and yet–

The small crescent-shaped scar on Abby's cheek flashed in his mind. He threw his arms down, and blew out his cheeks.

What if his return hurt them? 

No.

He shook his head and got to his feet. He strode purposefully over to the mirror, and continued to practice. "Abby," he said, a grin awkwardly plastered on his face. It would feel natural, he assured himself, given enough time. And the tram ride to Laos, lasted hours. "It's me. I'm back. I died, but I'm back somehow." He hung his head, gazing at his reflection, through his eyelashes. "I missed you." His voice was low. "Missed Lucy. When I died, I went somewhere, and you were there, making stew. Lucy was being himself and I was..." His lip trembled. "I was miserable, because they weren't real. Maybe that's what made me come back to life, I had to get to the real thing, I couldn't resign myself to a lie, nice as it was. I couldn't let the last thing you saw of me be my death. I couldn't leave my brother alone - " A hoarse chuckle spilled from his lips. "Lucy's terrible alone. He's still so needy, even though he's not a cat. I bet he tries to sit on your lap still, and coerce you into scratching him behind his ears. Idiot," he spat, tears wetting his cheeks. "He's such an idiot, he needs me." Sebbi raised his head, wiped the tears away. Red eyes stared back at him. "No, turns out I need him as much as I need you. As much as I've always needed you." A tear fell into the sink basin. "I love you both so much. Please don't be mad I'm alive."

He stepped away from the sink.

If you can't trust yourself, trust them.

Gods, why couldn't he be better at being honest?