-----------------Gulf's POV----------------

I never imagined that Mew decided to cut all ties because he fell in love with me, when he suddenly confessed I was so stunned and couldn't believe what I heard and had no choice but to be honest with him.

I'm sure he was so hurt and cried a lot because of me but I don't want to lose him, he is the only person who knows the real me, he is really the closest to me, I was so glad when he visited me days later, I could tell he was happy to see me again, cooking and eating together, I enjoy myself the most with him.

He still keep a little distance which I completely understand, just knowing he is close by is enough, I just don't want to be alone again, he was the first person who accepted in my whole life, he supported and encouraged me, I cherish our friendship a lot... maybe one day I would fall in love him too and we can be a happy couple enjoying a peaceful blissful days

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"hey Gulf! I finally got to see you" I was suddenly stopped but a man who looked the same age as me while heading to the meeting room for script reading of my new series

"hello, I'm sorry I forgot who you are" I apologized feeling anxious

"no wonder you forgot me, it's been almost 10 years, we both changed a lot, I also didn't know it was you at first, I'm Kris Nantin, we lost contact after graduating high school as I had to go China"

"Kris? Wow you changed a lot! If you didn't tell me your name I wouldn't have recognized you, it's really been a long time" I bluffed not knowing how to get out of this problem, the other me never mentioned this Kris in his diaries nor heard his other friends and family talking about him

"yeah, I really miss my home country"

"are you back for good?"

"no, I was asked to take part in the new series since the character is half Chinese just like me, at first I wasn't interested but when I saw your name in the cast I accepted immediately, we can finally fulfil our promise of acting together"

"it took you so long"

"I can't help it, once I arrived, I had to pass many exams and got so busy with university so I only focused on my job as an idol and actor there in China"

"I understand " I kept going with the flow and remembering everything he says so I can come up with perfect lies, thankfully, he is so talkative, after finishing the meeting

"btw are you still in contract with Trin and Pon?" I felt so happy to hear familiar names, I'm so lucky that he knows my other two close friends

"of course, we would meet whenever we have time"

"that's amazing! Call them and let's meet this weekend the four of us for dinner" he said standing in front of his car

"sure, I will send you the location later"

"great! See you soon"I quickly called Mew and told him about that encounter

"that's definitely a big problem, you did great going with the flow but you still need to know a little more about him"

"since he is a famous idol in China I may find some infos about his background, could you help me with that?"

"of course, I will send you everything I find, just keep being friendly with him"

"thank you, that's what I plan on doing, I hope when we meet with my other friends they will talk a lot so I can know more about their past"

"you should start by contacting them now over messages maybe they will tell you few things before meeting him again"

"good idea, I will do that as soon as I finish my work, thanks Mew"

"any time, good luck Gulf" later when I contacted my two friends

Thankfully I managed to find more information about him, we are childhood friends, we got along so well, his mother is Thai, his father is Chinese and he also have a younger sister, and I will be able to go with the flow when we meet the four of us, what I'm worried about is when he may talk about our childhood

"didn't you find anything that the other Gulf had about him?"

"no, nothing, I tried searching everywhere, I'm really worried"

"it will be fine, you already went through a lot, at worst cases you can lie and say you had an accident in university and suffer from a Mild amnesia that you kept a secret or smth" Mew suggested

"I agree, I'm sure he would believe that lie since it seem he was so close with Gulf and surely trust him a lot although I feel guilty lying to him"

"it can't be helped, luckily he will return to China after finishing this series"

"that's right, I will do my best until he goes back" when the four of us met on Saturday, we surprisingly had so much fun, his cheerful aura brightened up the atmosphere even more and we were laughing till sometime past 10 pm, I had to bluff now and then but luckily they mostly kept asking him about his life in China and all, Pon had to take Trin back who was already dead drunk

"hey Gulf, let me stay over at your place tonight so we can talk some more" I was shocked for a moment

"sure, let's go" I said not wanting to make him be suspicious of me at all

"wow! You have an amazing condo!"

"thanks, let me bring you a change of clothes"

"then I'll go take a shower first" he went into the bathroom while I walked to the bedroom already feeling anxious, he will surely talk about our childhood, my only way is to lie just what Mew said, later we sat in the living room

"I enjoyed my time a lot with you, I really wish I stayed here in Thailand and debuted as an idol along with you, btw why didn't you become one?"

"oh, I wanted to only focus on acting and modeling, honestly singing and dancing isn't really my thing"

"you are an astonishing young actor, you also became braver, I watched that famous TV show when you appeared and talking about stalking, I kept bragging to my friends there that you are my childhood close friend"

"all people change at some point, you also changed"

"I've become more handsome right?"

"a little bit" I giggled

"so mean, well you became so beautiful and attractive Gulf" I smiled feeling weird being called beautiful by him

"thank you, how is you family?"

"oh, my parents are lovey-dovey like before and my sister is studying so hard to become a nurse"

"that's great to hear, my brother is also studying hard to be a lawyer"

"wow he grew up a lot I plan on visiting him before I go back to China, it still funny that me and your brother share the same name"

"yeah, I'm surrounded by many Kris" we kept talking some more about some other random things, I was so grateful that he didn't talk much about our childhood.

Since that day we would spend most of the time together since we meet a lot for acting, we also would go for dinner and stay out until late, he also invited me to stay over at his place a couple of times and used the time to practice for our scenes

I enjoyed myself with him a lot but because of him the time I used to spend with Mew decreased so much, we are still half the way of the series and I didn't see Mew for more than 10 days and this is making me a bit depressed

"hey Gulf, let's go somehow on your rest day tomorrow, I only have a few scenes to do in the morning" Kris said surrounding my neck with his hand

"I'm sorry Kris, I have plans for tomorrow"

"plans? With who?"

"I'm meeting with a close friend I met a year ago"

"then let's go out the three of us"

"let me ask him first" I contacted Mew who was glad to see me and meet Kris, the next day, I found Mew waiting for me

"sorry I'm late"

"I only came here few minutes ago so it's fine, when is your friend coming?" I noticed that Mew looked both happy and down

"he should be here soon, Mew what's wrong? You look down"

"oh, it's nothing, I just felt castaway after you met this Kris"

"sorry, he kept dragging me around and I couldn't reject him besides I got really busy with acting in a series and a movie at the same time"

"it's fine, just don't forget about me"

"that will never happen, you are my number one!" I said as suddenly Mew turned red looking away

"that's really not fair, please stop with those sudden attacks, they are not good for my heart" I was surprised for a minute then smiled

"you should have gotten used to then by now"

"I never will" he glanced back to me as we stared at each other with a wide smile

"hey Gulf!" Kris came running toward me

"good work for today"

"thanks, oh Hi! I'm Kris Nantin, I'm Gulf's childhood friend"

"it's an honor meeting you Kris, I'm Mew Suppasit, I recently became close friends with Gulf let's get along" I watched them shaking hands yet I noticed their serious stares to each other which created an awkward atmosphere

"well come on let's go! I already reserved the movie tickets" I said wanting to change the serious mood that never disappeared all day long, they were never on the same page and I stuck between them, like when we went shopping each one would try to drag me to a certain shop or when eating they both offered me to taste from their food at the same time and it troubled me a lot

"could you both stop it! We're not kids anymore!" I finally blurted when we were sitting in the park, luckily the place was empty, they both glanced to me in surprise

"stop what?" Kris asked

"did you think I wouldn't notice you both secretly fighting? Just tell me what's wrong?"

"let's say we both have the same amount of interest in you and I'm trying to keep you away from him" Mew stated glaring to Kris who got stunned

"same amount? You mean...? No way" I looked to Kris

"are you both dating?" he suddenly asked making me and Mew stare at each other for a minute then back to him

"no we are not, it's one sided of my part and it seem it's the same for you" Mew answered as I looked down troubled

"since it came to this no need to hide it anymore then, Gulf, I have fallen in love with you, actually you are my first love since high school but I couldn't confess back then since I had to go to China but now I'm even willing to come back and start anew here in Thai so please give me a chance" he said facing me, he looked so serious as Mew was shocked staring at me, I was speechless for a minute then sighed

"I'm sorry Kris, I can't accept your feeling, I only see you as a childhood friend nothing more" I stated not having any other option but be honest with him

"please don't say that, we were so close during high school, we even held hands and hugged, is it because I didn't contact you for the past 10 years?" he looked so desperate holding my shoulder tightly

"I'm not the same Gulf you knew from before, I told you people change, besides, I always thought of you as a brother, please, I don't want to lose you as a friend but I can't accept your feelings, I apologize" I felt so sad rejecting him like this, unlike Mew my feelings toward Kris were clear and I can't see myself falling for him ever

"no, I can't accept this answer, I want you to be mine, I only loved you for years, you are the only one for me, I even chose to become an idol to be closer to you" his grip got tighter that it started to hurt, Mew who noticed that pushed him away from me

"stop troubling him like that, you already have put him in a very difficult position by confessing, he treasured you as a friend all those years so it's obvious he can't see you as more than that" Mew said standing in front of me

"you shut up! You also love him and want to steal him from me"

"it's true I also love him a lot, but I also don't want to lose him, he already rejected me yet as you can see we are still good friends and that's enough for me, if you truly love him you must respect and accept his decision" I was so affected by what Mew said, he really was thinking of my feelings all this time, he keeps holding himself back for my sake

"you don't understand, it's a 12 years long of love, I always imagined my future with him, I can't simply give up like this" Kris looked down

"I'm really sorry Kris, but I can only see you as a friend, I hope you will find a better person who will make you forget all those years and even forget me, I'm sorry, it makes me so sad to know that we won't be able to be close friends as before" tears formed in Kris's eyes as he fell back on the close bench

"a part of me knew that you would reject me but it's so painful, I know it's my fault for losing contact with you all those years but I thought I still had a chance since we grew up together"

"I know that no word can comfort you now but Time is the greatest healer and you will be to go through this, you are a strong and amazing man, may you find a better happiness"

"although I should be so angry at you now and even cut all contact, I can't because I know you are feeling so guilty and so sad" he glanced to me with a sad faint smile

"thank you for being honest, let's stay good friends at least and I hope you will find your true love" I smiled back

"let's both be happy" after seeing him drive away, me and Mew went back to my place, as soon as we closed the door, he came holding me tightly without a warning, I flinched staring at him with wide eyes

"M-Mew?" he was silent holding me closer to him as I could even feel his racing heart beats and his warmth mixing with me, a minute later he backed away with pinkish cheeks

"sorry, it's just I got so happy when you rejected him, I'm the worst for being happy over that but I can't help it" I kept staring at Mew in silence feeling strange, he looked back to me

"Gulf? What's wrong? Your face is bright red!!!" he said making me realize how hot my cheeks felt, I kept feeling strange as my heart was skipping a beat while Mew looked at me with worry coming closer and checking if I had a fever

"I'm fine, don't worry, I understand your feelings, you must have been relieved when I rejected him"

"yes, it gave me a little hope" I smiled watching his little sparkly clear eyes, somehow I could even see my reflection in them

"I thought you would give up on me"

"I tried but I can't, just like I'm your number one you are also my number one in my life" he grinned softly with his rosy cheeks, seeing Mew like this and hearing how he loves me and how happy he looks when he say that, how he keeps thinking of me and stay with me while respecting my feelings, his honesty and care, his kindness and compassion

"I really want to fall in love with you" I suddenly uttered without realizing, just when I noticed I quickly held back my mouth feeling so embarrassed, Mew was stunned watching me, his cheeks turned scarlet as he kneeled down hiding his face but his red ears were so clear

"I told you to stop with those sudden attacks, I won't be able to control myself next time"

"I'm sorry, I didn't mean to say it out loud" he stood up smiling

"I'm really happy that you want to try and fall for me but please don't force yourself and let our fate decide whether we are meant to be together or not"

"I hope we are"

"I hope too"

Even though I said that but already I'm feeling smth toward Mew, I'm not sure if it's love but I can feel that I'm slowly getting there

'please my heart hurry up and fall for Mew'