Dedicated to amazingness and her sister, to whom I wish a very happy birthday :)

~

"A kiss is a lovely trick designed by nature to stop speech when words become superfluous." 

- Ingrid Bergman

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It came to Draco's attention that he had not been telling Blaise and Pansy very much. Granted, there was an awful lot he wanted to keep to himself, but still. They were his best friends, and once Pansy had settled herself in Granger's chair, he started to tell them what had transpired in the alleyway. He chose to leave out Theodore's precise words of his threat to Hermione because that was not something he was ready to discuss, and instead made it sound like he was going to hurt her because she was Potter's best friend, not Draco's... whatever she was to him. 

They remained silent through the whole thing, even after he'd finished, their eyes lost in thought. Then Blaise let out a breath, shaking his head.

"Shit, no wonder you look so panicked."

"Panicked?"

"Yeah, I mean you could actually get killed here."

"I think you mean Granger could," he said slowly.

"Well, yeah, but you could too."

He raised an eyebrow. "Pardon?"

Blaise looked at him as though speaking with a metal person. "The Unbreakable Vow, mate." He glanced over to Pansy for support, but she hardly noticed, her eyes trained calculatingly on Draco in a way that had him squirm in his bed. He looked back to his friend. "Remember? She dies, you die?"

And suddenly he did remember. 'You die, I die' was the line he'd used so often in those first months with her, using it whenever she was hesitant to do something he asked of her. He couldn't even remember the last time he'd had to say those words so she would believe he wasn't actually trying to harm her.

"Blaise," Pansy spoke up, "I'd like a moment with Draco." When he did not move, she added, "Alone."

He frowned, the lines in his forehead creased. "But why –?"

Her gaze left Draco and met his, a small smile on her lips. "You won't be missing out on anything, it'll only take a moment. Please."

He looked unhappy to be out of the loop, but trusted Pansy enough to her word. With one last questioning look, the door closed behind him.

"How long?" she asked the second they were alone.

"Excuse me?"

"Don't be thick, Draco. How long have you had this thing for Granger?"

Instantly, he was defensive, and he sat up straighter. "I don't have a thing for her! Damn it, Pansy, just because I don't want Theodore to hurt her doesn't mean I'm in love with the bint. It's the decent thing to do, isn't it? To want to keep her alive."

"He was our best friend, Draco. He can't – he wouldn't actually hurt –" But she was spluttering, and she stopped, and it made Draco realise that, though she did not say it, while Theodore had been Draco and Blaise's best friend and at some point also Pansy's, he had been her boyfriend, and so she knew him in a way neither men ever would. Except, that also made her more vulnerable to Nott, unable to accept that he was no longer the person she grew to love.

"Listen," he said after a pause. "I know you cared for him, and I know he cared for you too, but underestimating him is the worst thing you could do. He's smart, Pansy. And he's pissed, especially now that he knows about you and Blaise."

She blanched. "He knows?"

He nodded. "He'll hurt her, I know it. Maybe there's still a part of the old him inside, but it's deteriorating quickly, and soon there's going to be no one but a grief driven man in his place. And grief... as I'm sure you know, is a very powerful thing."

Another pause, then, "So what do you plan to do, exactly?"

"I was going to leave, but as Blaise pointed out, I'm starting to think that's not an option."

She stared at him indignantly. "Of course you can't leave. It's too late to pretend you don't care about her. You do, Draco," she added fiercely, seeing him about to correct her. "My god, you're in so much denial it's sickening. Why are you fighting it? I like her."

He glared at her. "Evidently. And it was never supposed to go this far, you know that."

"It's too late to turn back now."

"No, it's not." He hesitated. "They've got Obliviate for a reason."

She paused to understand his meaning, then her eyes widened. "No," she said. "No, you're not taking the easy way out! This is about her too. You get Obliviated and it's only going to hurt her more than even Theodore could."  

"Could always Obliviate her too," he told her lightly. 

Pansy's eyes darkened. "So you're saying you'd be ready to steal a whole year away from her?"

"I'm just saying that, should the situation arise where things get too catastrophic, it's an option. And it's not like she's going to miss this year, is it? She's fighting with Weasley because of a reason I still don't know, she barely sees Potter and the Weaslette, then there's the whole time spent with me –"

"Which she doesn't mind so much, if you haven't noticed," she cut across. "I don't know when it started, but I've been suspecting something's going on between you two for some time, and I'd just like for you to admit it or at least do something about it!"

"What do you want me to do?" Draco snarled. "Even if there was something – which there isn't," he said quickly, "I still couldn't act on it."

"You could admit it, then."

"Fine. I admit I've gotten closer to her than I should have, but that's it Pansy. Now, let Blaise back in –"

"Oh for Merlin's sake!" she cried. "Are you really that determined to be with Ophelia? Or are you afraid? Is that it?"

"I'm not afraid of anything," he growled.

She opened her mouth resentfully to say more, but words failed her. They were both silent, then she sighed and ran a hand over her face. "Okay, it's not up to me to decide how you feel. You may love her, you may not. But I know one thing, and that is you're definitely going down that road."

Draco, whose anger was bubbling away, looked at her again. "And how can you be so sure?"

Pansy met his gaze and leaned forward in her seat. "When Astoria was in trouble that day, about to be killed, you didn't think about her so much, but more about yourself and the knowledge that if you were to interfere, the probability that you would be killed was high." Her eyes flickered over his features to make sure she hadn't upset him. "But then the moment Hermione's life was threatened, all thoughts about yourself vanished to be replaced with only her safety." She let out a breathy laugh. "You didn't even bother to think that you'd be killed too. Then..." She stopped as though unsure whether or not to say it.

"What?"

Pansy looked at the water cooler beside his bed instead, unable to meet his eye anymore. "You remember when we were together?" she asked reluctantly.

"Of course."

"Remember when Theodore told me what had happened to Astoria and Daphne?"

It was a moment Draco could never forget, the look on her face. "Yes."

"And when I told you I hated you?"

Another he wouldn't be forgetting soon. "Yes."

"And when I said I didn't want to be your friend?"

"Yes," he said quietly.

"That I never loved you?"

"Yes."

"I lied."

Several seconds went by for the information to full sink in. "As a friend?"

Several seconds went by for her to speak. "No." She looked up then, her smile far too sad and uncharacteristic. "You don't even know, do you? How much I really loved you. You don't even know how much Astoria did either." She shook her head, her eyes shiny. "I don't know what it is about you, but when you get a girl to fall for you, she really falls for you. The heartbreaker you were known as in Hogwarts. Did you know that?" He shook his head and she nodded, having expected as much. "All the girls wanted you to fall for them, they all wanted to be able to rip away that cold and arrogant façade you put on, to get to the man underneath all that." She drew in a long shaky breath. "When you and I went out, I was elated. Hoped that I could be the girl to get under the famous Draco Malfoy's skin..." Pansy placed her hand on his arm and rubbed it gently. "That mask is wiped away when you look at her. Hermione. You can see it in your eyes. They come to life with this emotion I've never seen before, even when she's bugging the shit out of you, it's there. A kind of spark only she can ignite. When you're with her, you're completely at ease. Happy."

He dropped his gaze this time. Looked over to the window as though he could actually see through the blinds obscuring the view.

"I guess that's just another thing Granger beat me at," she said sadly.

"I don't love her." His voice was so far away; he almost did not recognise it.

"Who are you trying to convince? Me or you?" 

***

St. Mungo's kept him over night for observation. He would have stayed partly the next day too, only Draco managed to convince his mother to talk to the staff, and he was out of there by 9am. Apparition in his current condition was not recommended, so he had to enter via the front door again.

The entire downstairs of the apartment was empty. It struck Draco as strange because Granger was always up by this time, bashing around pots and pans in the kitchen. He swore some mornings she did it on purpose just to agitate or get him up earlier, which would make him grumpy either way because he hated mornings.   

Frowning, he went up to her room, and as he drew closer the hum of music could be heard. The door was slightly ajar. Again, this confused him because she always slept with it closed or open, never partly because of some weird pet peeve.

He knocked and pushed the door open. It creaked and there was Hermione, standing in front of her mirror, her hips swaying to the faint music as she sang under her breath in only a bathrobe, applying makeup.  

The sight made him smile without really realising it, and when he did he quickly shook his head, as if that alone would stop him feeling this way.

"Hey," he said.

She turned in his direction, surprised. "Hey."

"What are you getting ready for?" he asked, nodding at the makeup strewn over her dresser.

"It's Neville and Luna's wedding today, remember?"

He didn't, but nodded anyway.

"You don't have to stand in my doorway all morning either," she said after a while, and gestured to her bed. "You can sit."

"I was going to anyway," he said stubbornly; like he needed her permission to sit down. But when he was finally sitting on the bed, he became very aware that he had not been in her room for a long time. He never went in there very much before (the longest amount of time when he'd found her crying all those months ago), but ever since they'd kissed he avoided it like the plague. Draco also became very aware that she was only clad in a robe, and shit, she smelled good. He wondered if it was her or her hair that smelled of rose petals.

"What are you doing back so early? I wasn't expecting you until later."

Crookshanks appeared from under the bed. He reached down and scratched him behind the ears. "Mother pulled a few strings."

She snorted, and through the mirror Draco saw her lips quirk. "Figures. Still a spoilt rich kid through and through, aren't you?"

"Some things never change."

She paused in the act of putting on her blush (he knew what it was purely thanks to Pansy), and glanced up at him, all humour gone as their eyes locked. "And some things do."

The air shifted into awkward again. When he could no longer hold her gaze, he patted Crookshanks again for something to do. 

"I'm sorry about how I acted in the hospital," he said finally, still determinedly looking at the cat.

"Why, I think that's two apologies from Draco Malfoy in one month." She had the gall to look bemused. "I think I've achieved something here."

"You're a spiteful bitch," he grumbled.

"What was that?"

"I said you're a delightful witch."

She grinned, and then slowly it faded. "I was so annoyed with you," she said after a second. "But I do understand where you were coming from. You're just trying to keep the next six months as simple as possible. I get that. And I'm sorry for making that difficult for you. But... Draco." She turned around fully. "We've known from the beginning what the end of all this would be. I can't see why we can't just... just go with the flow until that time comes, you know?"

He did not say anything and she turned again, attention back on the mirror.

"How's your head?" she asked.

Draco shrugged. "Fine, I suppose."

"Those Death Eaters messed you up pretty bad, huh?"

He gaped at her. "How – how did you –?"

"Harry and Ron. They actually managed to catch a fair few of them. Said the attack happened in Diagon Alley, and I knew that's where you were, so I put two and two together."

For a moment, he stared off in space, remembering the whole ordeal, and said quietly, "I could have ran."

"Hm?"

"I could have hidden away. From the Death Eaters. Only I didn't. I called them over to me."

She was in the middle of putting on lipstick, but his words made her spin around to face him, seemingly unaware she'd smudged her lipstick. "You called them over?" she demanded steadily. "You mean to say you could have saved yourself all that trouble if only you'd had enough sense to Apparate like everyone else did on the scene?" He didn't say anything, and this sparked a flash of annoyance in her eyes. "Draco! What is wrong with you? I was at that park! I saw the hate in Nott's eyes when he saw you. Do you even realise how stupid that was? Do you want to die, is that it? Or is this all some sick game –?"

Without making the conscious decision, Draco had gotten up from the bed and was now standing in front of Granger, both hands on her shoulders to make her look at him. "I ran into Theodore." Her eyes went wide and she struggled to push him away, mouth opening to say another disapproving comment, but he shushed her. "Hold on. Listen. He threatened you, Hermione. Not my life, yours."

She pulled away, looking incredulous. "Me? Why me? I don't even know the ignorant little –"

"Never mind why," he said harshly. "I'm telling you because you need to know."

Hermione stood a little taller. "I'm not scared of him."

"Hermione, he's smart. Almost as much as you. Intelligent and bloodthirsty are two very bad combinations."

"Are you saying you doubt me?"

"No, I'm not. If it were any other Death Eater, I wouldn't bother to warn you. I know what you can do, I've seen it. And I'm not going to follow you around everywhere and ask to know where you're going at every second. I'm keeping you on the alert, is all."

She hesitated, and asked quietly, "Why do you care so much?"

"Because..." he started carefully, "when the war was going on, you were fighting for your rights as a Muggle-born. You were fighting for Potter. Weasley. Everyone you loved. You went into battle that day knowing you could die, but also knowing, should you die for anything at all, what better way to go than fighting for what you believe in, fighting to keep the people you love safe. Potter and Weasley are your best friends. You've been together from the beginning, and you'll be together until the very end. That's the type of people you should risk your life for. But... but if Nott hurts you... if you were to die because of me, the kid who taunted and teased you for years, the one who always went out of his way to bring you down..." He shook his head. "I couldn't stand it if someone like you died for someone like me. I really couldn't." 

She gently brushed his fringe out of his eyes. "I die, you die. Remember?"

He almost smiled at the familiar phrase. "Yeah, I do."

"So you wouldn't have to live with the guilt for long. Besides," she added, a little brighter, and again she stood taller so as to look intimidating, which did not work very well because she was still only wearing a robe and the smudged makeup, "I can take the scoundrel."

"Yes," he said dryly, "looking like that is thoroughly frightening. Keep talking like that Granger and I may wet myself."

"Oh shut up," she huffed.   

"Better put two strokes of lipstick across both cheeks to look like a warrior instead of on your chin."

"Yes, very amusing – wait, on my chin?"

"Not really on your chin, but lower lip."

She reached up and swiped her fingertip over the red stain, but made the whole thing that much worse.

"Okay, stop. Stop." He grabbled her wrist, his fingers curling tightly around the skin, and brought up his other hand. Then paused. It could have only been for a second, if that. But in that second so much went through his head, and perhaps Granger saw some kind of change in his eyes, because the light atmosphere in the room slipped, dissolved, and was replaced by a kind of tension. The original idea had been to simply drag his finger over the smudge and be finished with it, but he found himself wanting to know if her cheek was really as soft as he remembered it to be, and he pressed his palm against the smooth flesh. He heard her draw in a breath, but she did not move to stop him and remained perfectly still. Looking at her lips, his thumb gently ran under her lower lip, and at his touch, they parted for him. When the stain was gone, he did not take away his hand, and she did not look away.

Later, he would wonder what might have happened. Would wonder if he'd only imagined the way her face moved closer to his, but the door downstairs opened and closed again, startling both of them, and whatever had just happened was gone. He took a reluctant step back, as did she, each looking pointedly at the floor as Hermione's bedroom door opened and in stepped the Weaslette.

"Oh," she said, glancing from Granger in the bathrobe to Draco, and while they'd taken steps away, they were till rather close, and they were after all in her bedroom. "I, uh, sorry. Guess I should have knocked."

"No, don't be silly," Granger hastened to say, sounding breathless and doing nothing to make the situation look any better. "I'm glad you're here but... why are you here?"

"Well, I just sort of thought you and I could get ready together, like we did at Bill, Percy and George's wedding. I should have asked first –"

"How'd you even get in here?" Draco asked, not caring to sound polite. "Did you weasel your way under the door?" Obviously he knew she hadn't because he heard it open. Still. Anything to agitate a Weasley.

She narrowed her eyes suspiciously at Draco and chanced another quick glance in Granger's direction. Draco knew she was trying to figure out what she'd walked in on. "Hermione gave me a key when she first moved in here," she replied coolly. "Not that it's any of your business." 

"I'm very happy you're here," Hermione said quickly, before Draco could reply. "I actually need some help with my makeup."

"Yeah, Granger's having lots of trouble with that lipstick." He winked at her, and was not disappointed when she blushed furiously and the Weaslette glared, looking even more suspicious.

"I left my things downstairs," Weasley said slowly, still glaring. "I'll just go and get them." She left the room.

Granger rounded on Draco instantly. "What the hell was that?"

"Hey." He raised his hands in surrender. "I'm not the one who went as red as a tomato."

He tried not to wince when she slapped his arm. "Don't do that! The last thing I need is for Ginny to think something's going on –"

"I'd be surprised if Potter hasn't already told her."

It didn't hit him what he'd really said until her eyes went wide with, first understanding, then horror. He mentally kicked himself.

"Harry – Harry knows?"

Before Draco could say anything the Weasel's sister was back, oblivious to Granger's state of alarm.

"So, what is it you're having trouble with?" she asked, digging around in one of her fifty bags for something.

Granger was still staring at him in terror, like she hoped he would tell her it was all a joke. But he didn't, and she dragged her eyes away from him to Weaslette, who was still futilely searching. "Um, I'm having trouble with the, uh..."

"With the...?"

Granger shook her head. "Um, the, you know."

"Mascara?" Draco offered, only to help her out.

"Yes, mascara," she said nodding. "My eyelashes are always getting stuck together."

"Okay, well – do you need to be here?" Weaslette said to Draco.

He glanced at Hermione, but she would not meet his gaze. "No, I was just leaving." And reluctantly, he did. Not just from her room, but the whole apartment too, and it was only when he was at Blaise's did he see the lipstick still on his finger. 

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So I haven't finished the next chapter yet, but I got a lot of requests to update and hence the new chapter. I loved the moment with him and Pansy <3 I don't ship them or anything because I actually really hate her in the books, but I love having a female best friend for Draco. Anyway, next chapter's the wedding. As you know, Draco has no intention of going, but what happens when Natalie tells Hermione it's essential for him to be there?

Also, those of you who read my message a few weeks back will already know that I have a kidney stone >.> it's not common to get one this young so I applaud my body for defying satistics (sarcasm), and I stil haven't peed the thing out. So! Again as a reminder, updates may not be regular, but I will work on them when I can. I thank you all so much for your patience and understanding.