Chapter 3:Denial, Guilt, Shame...love.
Chapter 3
~Tony’s POV~
His reaction to my words was instant and before I knew it, he had backhanded me across the cheek. My head snapped to the side and I tasted blood. Every part of me strained to respond in kind but as I straightened, I fought to reign in my temper. I couldn’t imagine someone surviving after getting into a fight with a vampire and unlike his little minion Kaio, I didn’t have a death wish.
Instead I stood there glaring at him and refusing to show even a slight sign that what he’d done affected me in anyway. I’d expected his anger, heck I even welcomed it, what I didn’t expect was the look of disappointment in his cold eyes as he looked down at me, more than that I didn’t expect to feel that strange twinge of guilt in my chest and I turned my gaze to Kaio’s still form.
I took in the blade that still protruded from his chest and the blood which had pooled beneath his body.
It wasn’t as if he was human; just a blood thirsty parasite with more loyalty than sense. There were bigger things at play here; like the fact that my men needed me in this crucial time of war.
Even one extra hand could make a difference between someone’s life and death yet here I was dragged from battle against my will and expected to play house with the likes of these pathetically immortal fools.
I pushed aside the guilt that tried to surface as I stared at kaio and turned back to Rien who was busy rolling up the sleeves of his shirt. He didn’t glance my way, neither did he speak and I felt uneasy standing there in the thick silence.
“I’m done with this place, you dragged me from my men, do you have any idea what consequences I could face when I go back?” I growled and he finally looked up, appraising me with a bored expression.
“If I had been foolish enough to leave you to your war, you would be dead right now.” He said, his tone cold.
“You were foolish enough to leave me in the army five years ago, why the sudden change of heart?” I snapped, disgusted with the entire situation.
“Keep in mind the fact that you got yourself into that mess.” He began, then I watched as he went over to the table and retrieved a knife from the holder. I took a step back, my heart pounding as I wondered what he would do with it.
He was a vampire, if I even managed to run I wouldn’t get very far.
“I’m not one to put up with insults, however I will turn a blind eye for now as I understand that you’re still upset that I left you” he was saying and I scoffed despite my unease.
“My reasons were honorable and despite the way you turned out…” he gestured to kaio’s body and the twinge from earlier returned. “the fact that you were able to slay a vampire; being the weak human that you are, shows some promise.”
I bristled at his words and took another step back when he stepped forward.
“He had it coming to him and if you’re gonna kill me, just get it over with, I’m not in the mood for your shit.”
His eyes glinted, as did the knife he held and I swallowed. Hard. In my line of work, one came face to face with death on a daily basis, but I’d never quite imagined dying at the hands of my ex-lover and certainly not in this way.
“You’re the murderer remember?”
I watched as he turned to Kaio and stared down at his form for a while before lowering himself to his side. A surge of what I refused to identify as jealousy hit me when he rested a hand on the slave’s cheek gently and held it there for a brief second before he turned away from his face and focused his attention on his chest.
He was pulling the dull knife from the body slowly and with care and I frowned. After discarding the bloodied weapon, he ran his palm along the sharp edge of the knife he’d removed from the table and it came away dripping with the darkest shade of red I’d ever seen and my eyes widened when I finally realized what he was doing. All my anger fled only to be replaced by astonishment.
“I thought a vampire couldn’t be revived with another vampire’s blood.” I blurted out and he didn’t even spare me a glance.
“I am of the master class.” Was all he said as he closed his hand around his wound, raised his fist directly above Kaio’s chest and squeezed until the strange red liquid trickled from his hand and directly onto Kaio’s wound.
“This shouldn’t even be possible, brave men and women fight wars and get ill and die every day and you guys have the power to change that and you don’t do anything about it. You disgust me.” I snarled; the anger just as potent as before, but when he paused and turned to me; what I saw in his eyes, sent a shiver down my spine and my blood ran cold.
“Get out, before I do something I’ll regret.”
……………………………………………..
~Kaio’s POV~
Veins pulsing, blood boiling, heart rate uncontrollable, throat as dry as ash,..
There was something inside me, something burning me from within. I tried to open my mouth to let out that scream of agony that was buried deep, but I couldn’t find my lips, neither could I find my voice and so I existed in silence, aching and burning and afraid that whatever evil was cursing through me would consume my being.
I only saw darkness in my pain but I could hear the beating of my own heart as it raced in my chest. It was all I could hear and my fear escalated. What was this? What was happening? This empty space I floated in was too alien, too…empty, but the burning from within centered my thoughts once more until it was all that my mind could process. I felt it in my fingertips and my toes but the pain was worse in my chest; every time I took a breath I felt it drive deeper.
A breath
I breathed! which meant I could smell and so fought to take in the air through a nose I couldn’t even feel and out of all the smells that assaulted me I latched onto one that was familiar; my esteemed master; my keeper, my savior whose scent it seemed would now be my saving grace for I turned my focus to his scent and thought of nothing else until the feeling of my entire being burning away, dissipated and I was finally awakened into a world I knew.
I opened my eyes as soon as I felt in control of my body, then squinted against the glare of the artificial lights hanging overhead.
“Ugh.” I groaned feeling the distant ache in my chest and tried to sit up despite the pain in my head, that’s when it all came rushing back to me; the unexciting day I’d spent with my keeper’s human that ended with him impaling me with a dinner knife. The shock I’d experienced then, returned full force and my mind reeled as I tried to understand how it was that I had been bested my a mere human.
“Kaio, I’ve waited long enough for you to awaken and now that you have, I’d prefer it if you didn’t waste your time stretched out of the floor. We have important matters to discuss.” A smooth velvety voice enunciated and I immediately scrambled up from the floor.
“My Lord…” For once I was at a complete loss for words as my mind began to process the only reason I could possibly be alive right now and I felt the shame burn through me at the thought of my master having to give me his blood.
To have that noble flesh torn to perform an act so completely beneath him; simply to bring an inconsequential being such as myself back to the land of the living.
I lowered my head, until my chin was brushing against my chest, fearful of what he might now do in the wake of my failure and shamed beyond anything I had ever known.
“I find myself uncertain whether to be angry with Tony for killing you or angry with you for allowing him to.” He spoke and I looked up at him, my eyes not quite meeting his.
“I apologize My Lord, I have failed you.”
“No need for the melodramatics Kaio, it seems we both underestimated him, though it would be a lie if I said I wasn’t disappointed in your defeat.” He continued, finally turning away from me to stand in the open doorway of the balcony, his hands crossed behind his back, his posture fitting that of a king.
“There seems to be whisper of an uprising in the coven, as a result I’ll need to make my presence known there as soon as I can. It simply means that I won’t have much time to get back into Tony’s good graces and we’ll have to take our chances with him unprepared.”
I nodded, then looked around the room, tilting my head this way and that.
“I do not hear his heartbeat.” I commented and I watched the infinitesimal tightening of my Keeper’s mouth before he spoke.
“He upset me and I told him to go, but no worries, I can hear him in the forestry; he’s still hasn’t realized just how far away from any human civilization we are.” He finished.
“Should I go fetch him sire?”
“No. I’ll deal with him when I see fit.”
I nodded and thought of how lucky the human was to have my master care so deeply for him. To get on my keeper’s nerves was no easy fete, but to anger him and still live to tell the tale was a miracle in itself and the boy took it all for granted; walked over my Keeper’s love as if it were nothing and spat in the face of his goodwill.
When my keeper turned to me once more fought hard not to chew my bottom lip as the shame spread through me once again. I would make the boy see that being offered my Keeper’s love was the best thing that could ever happen to him, because despite the fact that he had killed me, thereby lowering me in the eyes of my master; I still held no grudge against him. If my master saw that there was something in him to love then he couldn’t be a bad soul.
No, not bad. Just a creature in need of proper guidance.
“Go tend to your patient, he’s not received care since your death.” My Keeper announced and I felt a warmth blossom within me at the thought of seeing him.
“Very well my Lord.” I bowed respectfully and when I would have turned to go on my way, I paused. “Thank you sir.” I told him with sincerity and when he nodded in answer I left to room, moving quickly down the darkened passage, towards the only locked door in the place.
When I turned the key in the lock and pushed open the door I smiled at the sight of my patient resting fitfully on the large bed.
It still warmed me that my master had allowed me to heal him. He been severely wounded; even more so than Tony but when I’d laid eyes upon his still form as he lay broken on the battlefield I’d been unable to turn away and my Keeper had given me permission to take him in.
I fingered his discarded uniform; it was identical to Tony’s and I wondered briefly if they knew each other. I couldn’t wait for the day that my marine opened his eyes and I would be able to hear him speak.
Only a few days and he’d be completely healed then I’d be blessed with a warrior; just as my master was.
I reached up to swipe a hand across his forehead, then pulled back quickly when he groaned and shifted slightly.
Then I smiled.
I’d gotten myself a mate, I only hoped he would be happy by my side.
…………………………………………………
~Tony’s POV~
The more I ran, the more senseless the entire plan seemed. I jumped over partially concealed roots, ducks under low hanging branches and darted around trees until I was too tired to keep up the pace.
Around me I could only hear the sounds of the wilderness, no matter how hard I strained, I couldn’t detect even the slightest whir of a lonely car engine or even the whisper of a human voice. As the minutes ticked by my resolve weakened and after almost three hours of running I slowed then came to a stop.
It didn’t take me much longer to realize that this was the reason Rien had allowed me to leave; because he knew I wouldn’t be able to escape the forest. It was too vast and despite my training; the darkness made it next to impossible to navigate my way through the thick trees. Even using the stars as an aid was pointless with the way the trees hid them.
I slid to the ground, my back against the trunck of a tree and my heart pounding in my chest. Even if I had made it out of this place what would I do? According to Rien we were thousands of miles from the field. Who knew if we were even in the same country. Yet if my some miracle I made it back what would I say when I showed up there with a clean bill of health while my men’s bodies were boxed up and shipped home?
They would assume I’d gone AWOL for a while, hid like a coward from war, found refuge with the enemy…it didn’t matter, leaving active duty to go on a frolic of my own was tinged with unimaginable consequences. I could argue that I’d been a prisoner of war and I’d managed to escape but really who would believe the vampire story? There were so many lies I could tell but so many questions that would be asked that not even a well-placed lie couldn’t make right.
Did I really think I would have gotten away and everything would have magically gone back to the way it was?
“Ridiculous.” I grumbled under my breath and my head snapped up when I head a twig being crushed underfoot.
“Ridiculous that you’re sitting here filthy and freezing when you could be warm and comfortable in my home? Yes quite.” Rien said when I spotted him walking calmly toward me and I didn’t even have to energy to sass.
He’d taken me from war. He was the reason I probably wouldn’t be able to go back, yet he was the reason I was alive and I just didn’t know how to deal with it all. I’d been angry with him for years since he’d left me. My love and devotion had soured into hatred and scorn but eventually it had evened out into cold indifference so this constant anger I housed toward him now was frustrating but I couldn’t help it.
I guess I hadn’t really gotten over what he’d done and that ridiculous twinge in the annoying region of my heart whenever I saw him, told me I hadn’t completely gotten over those feelings either.
Now that I sat on the cold hard forest floor with no hope of going back to the life I’d become accustomed to, I was able to push away the denial and accept it for what it was. Rien still had a hold over me. Even after all this years and it made me angry to think he still affected me in some way.
“I suppose I should have explained that it would take a human days to traverse this woodland in order to make it back to civilization.” He commented and I ignored him. Too caught up in my own miserable thoughts to care.
Then after a brief bout of silence passed, he shifted and I watched in unease as he lowered himself onto the ground across from me. His back also pressed against a tree.
“I killed your slave, why haven’t you killed me yet?” I asked in a low voice, my eyes on his.
“I really do care for you Tony. It doesn’t matter what you do, how angry you make me…and today believe it when I say I was angry enough to kill…but it won’t change what you are to me or how I feel about you. You are my mate.”
“You used to tell me that a lot back then…but you sold me out to the army anyway, and now you think you can just come back and I’ll follow you like a fool?”
“I did what was best for you. You would not have survived in my coven the way you were. It would have been cruel to allow you to hope.” He explained and it didn’t ease my mood any to hear the words.
Everything was a jumbled mess in my head; ever since he showed up again but there was one thing I knew for sure and it was that I didn’t want anything to do with his coven. He’d caused me the kind of heartache that no one should ever have to experience when he’d left and I wasn’t about to fall into that trap again.
I was a man now. A warrior as Kaio had said; I should be tough, responsible, brave; not someone who could be easily swayed by stupid emotions and beautiful faces.
“So you’re trying to get me back… I get it, you want it to be like it was before and we run off into the sunset together like a couple a girls, but it doesn’t matter if I even feel anything for you because I closed that chapter of my life a long time ago.”
“You’re still angry th-”
“No. I get what you’re saying. I was a kid, I needed to grow up so you left me there hoping I would and I did, so I guess I should thank you for that, but it doesn’t mean I want the same thing you do. I just want to move on…without you.” My voice was soft and my eyes never wavered from his as I spoke.
I saw the momentary flash of hurt in his eyes at my words but then he masked them and I looked away.
“We were fated to become mates, what you’re feeling now is only temporary I’ll show you, then when we get to my coven-”
“I’m not going to your coven Rien. You think dragging me there against my will is gonna make me change my mind? Then you don’t know me every well.”
“I know you better than you know yourself. When a master class vampire discovers his mate, they are bound for eternity. You’ll come around and I’ll give you the life you’ve always wanted.”
I looked at him then, my eyes narrowed. “If you really cared like you claim you do, then you’d let me live my life the way I choose.”
“I adore you Tony, but you’ve never been the best judge of what’s best for yourself. Years from now, you’ll thank me.” he said and I watched as he pushed up from the ground then offered me a hand. I looked at him; too tired to argue and too emotionally drained to think on my next plan of action. I placed my hand in his and allowed him to pull me to my feet.
“Years from now, your face will be a distant memory.” I said with certainty, then pulled my hand from his and pushed pass him. He followed behind me slowly as I proceeded back to my prison. He uttered not one word in response.
AUTHOR'S NOTES
TIRED, GOING TO STUDY, HOPE YALL ENJOY AND KEEP SWEET.
-DoUbLe.A
-unedited.
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