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I felt bad in letting Daryl leave, after spending so much time with him. At his house or camping, it was strange to be suddenly alone.

The realization of what happened during the entirety of the camping trip blew me away, especially when I was sleeping alone. So even in the dead of night, did I turn my nightstand light on to open up the drawer beside me. Rereading the letter he wrote, just thinking of how tormenting it was for him to spill his feelings out onto a damn piece of paper.

He wasn't good with words, written or otherwise. But it was the feeling of seeing the love in his eyes that made me realize it.

Was it good to take this further step?
I believe it to be, thinking sex was just sex was stupid. It was the idea of being truly naked in front of him that sparked the beating interest. 

For the past five days, I've slept with him three times. We've said I love you, and now at 4:09 in the morning. Am I thinking of how far this relationship is going to go, how'd we manage a life with one another. And I hate how it all rests on the shoulders of if my credits transferred or not.

How unbelievable to think that I miss him right now. The dead of night, and the only reason I had fallen asleep in the first place is that I took a shower. Mom didn't even have to say anything to recognize that camping was exhausting, hell she took hold of one of my bags and helped me upstairs. 

Where it still is sitting at the base of my bed.

Tossing and turning did I catch myself reaching over to nothing on the other side, really put a damper on my mind to find out he has night terrors. Like I said, it reminds me of the kids I grew up with. Always someone wants to share the bed with us or another person, and instead am I given the responsibility of taking care of Daryl.

Hell, even Merle is wanting me to take it. Whether he doesn't trust himself or not, I don't know at all. It just worries me to the point of disbelief, it was something we didn't discuss at the purge. But a lot wasn't said in the time frame of us being...There.

By the time I actually fell asleep, I remember seeing the light starting to shine in my window. And truth be told, I forced myself to get up and reduce any other thought besides getting into the shower. If there was something I missed during camping, it was the entire set of the bathroom. The shower, a toilet to piss in. Guess it truly is the little things that make us completely grateful, and rather than just spend the day waiting in my room. Did I head downstairs to greet Jarod and bouncing baby in the high chair, whom I haven't seen since school on Friday.
"How was camping?" He asked, mouth full of cereal as he was reading something within a folder. 

Surprised he wants to know.

"Great." Was all I said, groaning at the thought of orange juice and some eggs to eat. The squirrel meat was delicious, but I don't think I can even look at another one for a little while. "Dad's really getting on my ass about it. Hope you're happy." Turning just as I was cracking an egg into a bowl before whisking it to a solid color. "Wasn't my plan. When's mom coming home?" His loud sigh wasn't exactly expected, but considering today was the I was meant to back anyway. It makes scenes for me to be fully out of the loop.

"She has something going on at the hospital, can you watch Mickey today? Maddie wants to do something...It won't be for long, just a couple hours. She's going on vacation and I want to see her before she leaves." I nodded, pouring the mixture into the pan before focusing on cooking it. Trying to think long and hard about how to continue this conversation was challenging, especially when I didn't have any clue what to do for Daryl as a plan.

"What's the plan for today big shot?"
"There's a carnival, barely half hour away. They clear out this lot of land, pretty great. They do it every year." 
That's it. That's what I can take Daryl to, we don't have to go on the rides. The games and whatever sort of shooting area will be good for us both. I said I wanted to take him out of the hunting mode, and he's the way to do it. "Can I have an address?"
"Are you going to track me down?"
"No...I want to go with—" The way Jarod was quick to spell out his name made me sigh, never really met an understanding with him about where the relationship is.

"How are you two doing?...Never asked..."
"You never ask because I don't think you really want to know." He chuckled, finishing this orange juice before coming beside me to the sink. And the immediate reaction was me waiting for Daryl's touch. The realization of how mirrored this felt was unreal. But his question only begged as he too sat himself down on the counter. 

"Are you two fighting...?"
"Not anymore." Was all I said, taking the pan off the burning stove to put the contains onto a plate. Even then was he buzzing around for an answer to the thousands of questions he had looming in his mind.

"Whoawhoa...Those are rumors, calm the fu—- calm down!" Almost about to swear before my baby brother, did he just cover the ears of the little boy before us both. 
Once those hands moved away from him, I couldn't help but share the laugh with my brother. Even the clueless little boy was quick to babble about. Saying 'Jar' to get his older brother's attention.
"So which ones are true?"
"Wanna list them all?" 

I tried to keep eye contact with him as long as I could, but the second I heard 'new years' I choked on my drink. "Ha! That one is true!" Trying to regain my own reaction do I just lean into my resting arm as I continue to eat my breakfast. It was already 10 and if he didn't hurry with this ridiculous fucking guessing game, then maybe he would already be on his way to getting Maddie.

"Do we really want to go here today?" I groaned, getting more than uncomfortable knowing that Jarod is starting to realize what is true and isn't.

"Alright...Alright! The carnival is out a little past the mall. He'd probably know where it is. Be back in a few hours!" In the midst of his departure, did I set my plate into the sink and wave him off. Making the baby do the same motion with his little hands, each finger sticking together as they move up and down.

With the house completely alone, and the weather as nice as it is. I decided to take little Mickey for a walk. Hopefully tiring him out so he can peacefully take his nap, but even after an hour of throwing the ball and running this way and that. Was he still energetic as when we started, so as I airplanes him this way and that.
He knew his time outside was cut to an end, especially when I placed him back into his highchair to fill a sip cup with water. Which he was quick to guzzle down, breathing so heavily against the plastic cup.

Getting the long strains of hair out of his face, was having him smile with the sippy cup just hanging on out. So pulling it back into his little hands, did he continue to finish it off. "Do you want more?"
"Ja!" He smiled, patting down at the little table space before him. Giggling up a damn storm before surprising him with apple juice.

But in the instant of him downing the drink once again, did his screaming and wailing to be let down only resulted in him running from each and every room of the house. He was wearing me out with his obsess mindset of thinking I am chasing him as a game.

One point it was fun, but now it was just a level of defeat when I sat down onto the floor. Unscrewing his sip cup to down the last sip of water. Him in his little onesie, hurrying around and around was I in the wrong thinking I can handle this.

Especially with a knock at the door completely pulling me out of thought, I take hold of the counter above me, seeing him between two walls completely distracting himself as his own entertainment. But without wasting any more time do I go straight to the door, trying to keep an eye off for me in case he comes running this way. But instead, am I taken back that Daryl is just standing before me.

His smile and wide eyes just spoke in the moment, so groaning down into my free hand as the other one still held the doorknob. "We're you trying to call me?"
"Yeah, figured ya wouldn't be near ya phone. Whatcha doin' anyhow?" I chuckled, still talking within the doorway as he resting his arm to the threshold. "Babysitting." 

He didn't believe me, and what told me that was his instant laugh in my face. But inviting him in did he stroll right through. "What? Jarod sick or somethin' or—" In the instant did the little Mickey come straight from the doorway that allowed entry to the kitchen, but he stopped in the instant and cried right on towards me. Staring right up to Daryl like he was a big bad monster.

"Ya didn't say ya had a baby brother." He said, smiling at him. But even then was the toddler griping my leg and hiding behind it, so reaching my hand did I begin to rub his head.
"Half brother." His understanding 'ah' was dragged out as he began to chuckle in a clear calming tone. "Was he at the party?" Rolling my eyes at his attempt at the joke was enough to distract me as he crouched down. Trying to appease the toddler still tugging at my leggings.
"Hey big man, what's goin' on?"

The way he spoke was much more tamed, almost when he—more or less the first night at camp. But that only had Mickey hide further, pouting even. "He's shy."
"Yeah, no shit—" My instant reaction was to hit him as he rose back on up. Daryl no realizing what he did was the clear indication of why I hit him.
"Don't swear! I am going to get in trouble." That's when the kid giggled, the fact that hit the 'big bad man' seemed to see how feeble the guy before him was. Especially when he went with a running start and tried pushing him.
"Hey big man, that ain't a good idea...How'd ya get stuck with babysittin' duty?" Taking a hold of Mickey within my arms, was he quick to adjust as I went straight to the kitchen. Distracting him with another cup of juice, there was no way he was taking a nap until after Jarod returns home. 

"Mom's working, Michael's deployed and Jarod's girlfriend is leaving for vacation tonight sooo..." The little baby just straddling at my hip as he sipped his juice, almost in spite of Daryl being here. The kid was smart, he knew what he was doing. "Gotcha wrapped around his little finger...Guess we can't go out tonight?" I shook my head, especially since the boy in my arms pointed to the numerous amount of toys in the living room. So I sat us both down to the ground, and as he rolled the cars around in a circle. Crashing them into one another did I start the conversation back on up. 

Seeing him just get comfortable in the armchair behind me. "Jarod's coming back in an hour. Think you can wait?" To be honest, I wasn't prepared for him to stay over and help me watch the kid, but he too plopped himself down beside me. Taking hold of the small toy truck that Mickey wasn't playing with. 

"This kid's spoiled to high heaven...Ain't he?" I nodded, trying to hold my smile but it ultimately turned into a frown. "Sounds funny...To be jealous of him when he doesn't know anything just yet..." He shrugged, and it was cute to catch him look around the house. I don't think he's stayed in this room long enough to look around. Much less take everything or the huge stack of toys. "Yeah, gotcha as a big sister. He's lucky. Bet Jarod's a good brother too."

He spoke again, so softly. It almost worried me how focused he was on the single toy. 

"Lake! Wook!" My smile instantly widened as he said my name, or tried to at least. He stumbled on over with a new toy in hand as I was so focused on what Daryl was doing, did I take the bulldozer.

"How old is he?"
"Almost Three...I don't know when his birthday is." He nodded along, but the moment Mickey interacted with him. By showing him another toy, did Daryl take that as a sign to return to the situation. Smiling and looking wide eye, just like the child.

How could I even attempt to hide my smile at that, he's making a friend here. Both of them, and however humorful that is. I couldn't deny it from the both of them to stop it. For him to act so childish.

This was an entirely new side and I couldn't believe the picture before my eyes.

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Date Posted: 03/14/18  // Time: 3:51
Word-Count: 2331
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