"Next up: Thanksgiving"
"Yum"

11-2-2020
Amelia has been texting me the past several days, mostly the usual "Hey, How are you" "not bad wbu" "not bad" "cool" stuff but occasionally a meme. She's still not talking to Rider though, idk what's up with that.

I close my journal and put it into my school backpack.
I glance to the clock sitting on the table beside my bed. 10:34. I should get ready for bed.
I get out of bed and begin my nighttime routine. By the time I get back to bed it's already 10:56.
I plug my phone in then get burrowed in my blankets. Now, to fall asleep.

Ash and I get out of the car, talking and laughing but suddenly I see a hurt bird and I push past Ash and run to it.
I'm now on my knees, holding the bird- a small seagull- in my hands.
Ash comes and stands behind me.
My right side is to the beach, and a car pulls into a parking spot just in front of me, I don't look up, I'm focused on the bird.
Ash, I stand up and we begin talking and walking around the lake together.
When we get behind the trees Ash asks if she can hold the bird. I carefully hand the bird to her and as soon as the bird is in her hands safely I'm being pushed up against a tree, being kissed.
Its Clyde.
We stop and he looks at me and says "I've been waiting months to do that."
I laugh, "so have I."
He reaches out on cups my face with his hands, his body leaning closer against mine.

I wake up sweating and breathing heavily.
What was that- I try to shake off the dream as I sit there in my bed, alarm blaring.
"Turn it off!" My mother calls.
I scramble to push the buttons on the alarm and eventually get it turned off.

Me: ASH
Ash: WHATS UP
Me: I JUST HAD SOME SORT OF WEIRD DREAM WHERE YOU CAME HERE TO VISIT AND CLYDE KISSED ME
Ash: WHAT
Me: AHHHHHHHH
Ash: do you think he'd actually do it??
Me: I DONT KNOW- HE WAS ALL OVER ME AT THE DANCE LAST MONTH (not like inappropriately but like huggy Feely and stuff-)
Ash: OH

Eventually I get dressed and go to the kitchen to eat a muffin.
"I'm taking the twins to school, I'll see you when I get home from work sweetie," my mother kisses the side of my forehead as she walks through the room, herding the twins ahead of her.
Each twin grabs their lunch box from the counter before going into the entrance hallway.
"I gotta get to the bus stop, I'll follow you out," I grab my backpack from my chair at the table and swing it over my shoulder.
"Your father said he'll be late tonight so I figured we'd eat out at that taco place we like," My mother suggests.
"That sounds good," I nod.
I can see the twins licking their lips as I walk past them and out the door.
"Bye," I wave my hand behind me, not looking back.
"Try to learn something," my mother calls.
Once I get to the curb I walk to the bus stop. I watch as Clyde comes out of his house and towards the bus stop, hoping he doesn't try to hug or touch me.
"Hey," Clyde waves.
"Hey," I wave back nervously.
After a minute, the bus comes to a stop in front of us.

Me: so far so good, we're on the bus
Ash: good

The bus ride is mostly quiet, both of us are on our phones.
Once we get to the school Clyde and I get off the bus and head into the building. I veer off to the strings room to put my violin away while Clyde gets dragged off by a fast talking Rider.
I take this opportunity to also go pick up my pictures from picture day at the office. When I get home tonight I'll put one of the little wallet sized ones into my journal for Ash.

By the time lunch comes around I'm completely paranoid. I sit near Clyde in most of our classes together and at lunch. If he wanted to do anything, he could.
"Ok," Rider says between bites of his pizza, "Never have I ever. I'll start. Never have I ever..." He trails off, "had straight A's."
Everyone looks around at each other before they speak up.
"I have?" I glance around the group.
"I have," Parker and Ashley chourus, followed by Clyde.
"I have not," Tristan laughs.
"I have," Max shrugs.
"You guys are all too smart," Rider grumbles, taking a bite of his pizza.
Tristan laughs, "ok. Never have I ever..." He trails off, "ok, new game."
Everyone laughs and it takes a moment before anyone actually speaks again, though in the midst the laughing, Clyde had scooted slightly closer to me.
"Too hard to think of things," I admit as I scoot a bit farther away.
Everyone except Rider nods.
"I thought of one," Rider shrugs.
Tristan punches his arm, "you suggested the game, idiot."
"Minor details," Rider laughs.
Ashley rolls her eyes, "So, Lana, does your family plan on going back to where you came from for the holidays?"
"Wisconsin, and no," I shake my head, "but I wish we were."
"What, is California not cool enough for you?" Rider laughs.
I roll my eyes, "we have family there, plus, I have friends there. Not that you guys aren't cool, but I miss them."
"Any cute boys back home?" Ashley laughs and glances to Parker, who glares at her and rolls his eyes.
I laugh nervously, but just as I go to respond the bell rings to go to class.

The day goes on and I'm terrified that Clyde will ask me to answer Ashley's question. Once we get on the bus I stay as quiet as possible for the whole ride.
"What are you doing after school?" Clyde asks.
I panic, "laundry. What about you-?"
"It's my day to do dishes once I'm done with my homework," Clyde sighs.
"Oof," I pull out my phone and go to text Ash.
"Tell Ash I say hi," Clyde pulls out his phone.
"Huh-?" I look over at him.
"You're always texting her," Clyde shrugs, "I assumed you were about to message her."
"I was-" I slide my phone back in my pocket, "now I'm a little freaked out that you watch who I'm texting," I laugh.
"You smile when you're talking to your friends," Clyde shrugs again.
"Oh-" I break off.
"This is our stop," Clyde puts his phone back into his pocket.
I climb off of the bus behind him.
"Clyde-" I reach for his arm as he goes to head into his house.
"You ok?" He turns to face me, "you've been a bit off today."
"Do you like me?" I bite my lip for a moment, scared of his answer.
"What?" Clyde blinks.
I begin to repeat myself, "Do yo-"
"No, I heard the question-" Clyde breaks off, "I don't have a crush on you, if that's what you're meaning-"
I let out a sigh of relief and he raises an eyebrow.
I scramble to come up with an explanation, "I'm not saying that you'd be a-"
"I get it," Clyde laughs, "we're friends."
I smile, "good."
Clyde smiles back, "I'll text you later, I gotta go."
"Kk," I nod, "have fun," I laugh.
"I'll try," Clyde shakes his head, laughing, and turns to go into his house.