"Chin up," Commander yelled and Manik straightened his torso. It's been five days to that terrible night. 

Five days, he hadn't seen her. 

He shook his head to throw that thought away. 

"Tez chal," Commander let out the command aloud and cadets started to move their feet faster. Manik participated with all his mind. He was on a proving spree how life could be same without her. 

"What's wrong with you, Manik?" Officer yelled as Manik broke the march. His mind was too busy feeling amazing about the blinder he had worn. 

"Out of line, NOW," Officer commanded and he marched out of formation. 

He cursed himself as he had failed miserably for third time in these five days. He closed his eyes to take a deep breath and all he could see was her face. He cursed himself more. It was like she had started to live in his mind. She won't ever go away. 

"What's the issue?" Officer brought him out of his cursing spree. 

"I have been noticing how you are doing pathetic these days," Officer asked sternly. 

"I am sorry, Sir. It won't happen again," Manik had no other option but to apologize to escape the grill. 

"Look, Manik. I know it's vacation time for your batch and I get it you are here for sake of it but if you decide to take part in a drill, you have to give your 100 percentage," Officer tried to address the possible issue with Manik. 

"Keep this in mind next time," Officer said patting his back and walked away. 

"There is nothing I am doing for sake of it," He mumbled to himself and walked away. He was angry all of sudden. Why it was so necessary for everything to shout out how he was being royally pathetic without her. He walked to locker room and threw his shirt in some corner. 

___________________________

Nandini sneaked out of her room as clock struck 8. It was already dark outside. She wore her other gumboot as she descended the stairs. She looked up as she stepped down the last stair to find her family settled for dinner. Her mother got up excitedly seeing her there. She looked away and started to walk towards door. 

"Nandini," Her mother called her name aloud and she had to stop. 

"Have dinner at least," Her mother had this unreasonable hope in her voice. Nandini clenched her fist trying not to come up with some nasty remark. 

"I am not hungry," She mumbled without a tinge of any emotion and walked out of her suffocating house. 

She had returned home two days back. Uncle Bernard was more than ready to have her in his house for however time she wanted to stay but then she could see Daadu's wrinkles getting darker. He had this furrows on his head every time he came to see her. It explained how much her parents were troubling him regarding her absence. She couldn't let the only person who loved her suffer because of her stubbornness. So yes, she had returned to Murthy Mansion only to show her face to her parents once in a day. She won't come out of her room and when she would, she made sure nobody dared to talk to her. 

"Let's do it," She mumbled to herself starting roaring engine of her newly customized Land rover defender. Rishi had it done for her and she couldn't refuse it. She loved engines. 

It was her first day of night job. She was going to work in Uncle Bernard's rescue center for night shift. She couldn't wait to drive her life back to road. She played the song loud as unwanted thoughts started to creep in. She had been away from herself for long, she couldn't wait to streamline her life again. She won't even mention how there was this someone who had walked away. 

_______________________________

"Would she be thinking about me?"

Question buzzed his mind as he sat on ledge of window holding the novel he was trying to read ever since she had stormed in his life. He couldn't complete it since then. He pursed his lips in irritation as he once again ended up thinking about her. He focused on the black words in that book. They were forming a line but he couldn't read it. They were mere words having no sense at all. 

HE COULD NOT READ ANYTHING.

He threw the book away in frustration and held his head. 

"What is wrong with you, Manik?"

He yelled at himself in that empty dorm. He was done, done with being an irreparable piece. Clock kept ticking and he eventually calmed down. He had learned to put himself in terrible delusion that everything was fine. He looked at door absentmindedly as clock bonged at 10 pm. A smile crept on his lips as he acknowledged his mind who was thinking how she was the one who could barge in anywhere without a warning. 

"You are incredible, Nandini." 

He murmured, still smiling. Her thoughts could soothe him in no time. He closed his eyes and leaned on wall to think about her further. 

Bipolar enough! 

____________________________________

"You have a company tonight?" Uncle Bernard said as he opened the door of office for her. 

"Harlow," Nandini chirped as soon as she saw him. He ran to her and put his paws on her tummy to tell her how much he had missed her. 

"I thought he would be a good company to you," Uncle Bernard said and Nandini rushed to hug him tight. 

"I shall leave now. I am so tired," He said and Nandini bade him goodbye. 

His car left and Nandini saw it disappearing in dark of night. Street was awfully aloof as she stared out of glass window. Her eyes kept looking empty road for sometime for some reason and she did not ask herself to stop looking that empty road. Harlow came and stood beside her putting his paws on thin ledge of window. He barked and Nandini's eyes searched the area urgently. He tapped his paws and got closer. 

"Seeking attention?" Nandini rolled her eyes and took him in tight clutch. Her face stiffened as if something had hit her silently. She could feel each muscle of her face going stiff as she kept standing there. Something had started to creep in and she didn't know how to shoo it away. She looked at Harlow who was looking out with his tongue out. She didn't know how to survive the night. 

"Would you hug me, Harlow?" She asked.

____________________________

"Oh yes"

Manik elated with an apparent grin on his face as he threw his arms on pillow. He was again dreaming and about what, well it was obvious. His nightmares were hovered by her since a long time. 

"No, don't go," He nagged like a kid as he frowned. His snores followed as his mouth opened to take in some air. 

"I told you na," He nagged further and turned on his stomach. 

"I would do anything," He murmured and snored. 

"Horse..." He uttered and then stopped. His legs worked and blanket went away flying. 

"I will be a horse," He agreed to whatever she was asking him in his dream. 

"I will do..." He started to say but then snored. 

He dug his face in pillow and groaned. 

"Don't go, please," He meowed and let out a whimper. 

"I am sorry," He mewled further still digging his face in pillow. Sweet silence tried to speculate if he had found whatever he needed in his dream but then he opened his eyes. 

Getting up, he walked to door and stood there dejectedly. He had been having similar dreams every night and now he had no might to fight them. He couldn't go beating himself for dreaming about her. She couldn't be removed, he sighed and put his hands on door to lean. 

_________________________

Morning brought another ridiculous day which was meaningless. Nandini entered the place called home and saw Daadu walking towards door in his usual perfect clothing.

"Where are you going?" She asked closing the door. 

"Nandini," Daadu smiled looking at his brave child. Kissing her temple, he looked at her as if talking to himself in mind. 

"You didn't tell," She asked again and he came out of his proud reverie. 

"Oh yes," Daadu clicked his lips and grabbed his club from corner. 

"I am going to meet someone," He told and Nandini shrugged her shoulders. She was dead tired after a night shift with some super-active dogs. 

"I would retire to bed," She told as she started to ascend the stairs. 

"I have made you a yummy omelette," Daadu informed her and she smiled looking back at him. 

"I love you," She mumbled and walked into her room. 

Daadu's smile vanished as soon as Nandini disappeared from his sight. 

"Time to meet a duffer," He mumbled under his mustache.  

His car halted in front of academy and he asked his driver to pick him up in an hour. He gazed the glorious building with a proud smile and then started to walk inside. 

"Send Cadet Malhotra in Colonel's office," Daadu told peon and walked to Colonel's office. Singh wasn't back yet but Daadu had conversed to him about his visit. 

_________________________

Manik walked to Colonel's office prepared himself for another blasting session. He knew how angry Colonel Singh would be at all his average performances these days. He knocked the door and a masculine voice asked him to come in. 

"Sir," Manik saluted and then looked up to find chair of colonel empty. 

"Daaduuuuu," He chirped as soon as he saw him sitting on other chair. His smile reached his eyes as Daadu looked back at him. He too smiled to his surprise. 

"How are you, Manik?" He asked asking him to take the seat. Instead, Manik ran to clutch him in a hug. 

Manik could feel Daadu's clenched muscles and he knew how it was outright wrong of him to seek warmth from Daadu. 

Manik broke the hug and settled in chair opposite of Daadu. Awkward silence did play like a mandatory background music as they both stared their feet. 

"Never knew you are this brave," Daadu broke the silence as he looked at Manik sternly. 

"Huh?" Manik asked baffled. 

"Five days?" Daadu asked aloud. 

Manik looked down totally seeing what was coming next. 

"How is she?" Manik asked fumbling. His voice came from that farthest corner. 

"How are you?" Daadu counter questioned. 

"I am fine," Manik asked inaudibly. 

"Did anyone tell you, that you are being stupid?" Daadu's voice raised without a warning and Manik flinched. 

"Get up," Daadu roared, his face red with all the ire he had. 

Manik got up immediately hearing that Brigadier tone. 

"Come here," Daadu roared further and Manik took two steps closer. 

"Stand here," Daadu commanded further tapping a point with his club.

Manik could feel his heart in his throat. He wasn't afraid but eager for some reason. It was like spell was about to break. 

"You lied, Malhotra," Daadu said controlling his breaths. He was angry. 

"You lied to me that day," Daadu added and Manik could now make out what Daadu was referring. 

"She was nothing to you," Daadu said still looking down. 

"No, she is," Manik argued immediately to earn a glare from Daadu. 

"She isn't," Daadu argued back. 

"She is," Manik re-framed it without knowing why it was so important. 

"Shut up," Daadu roared getting up. 

"Five days?" Daadu asked baffled and Manik felt this need to word whatever mess his mind was. 

"I was never good for her," He put across the theory he had been chanting all these days. 

"Don't even dare to talk about her," Daadu yelled. 

"She deserves better. She deserves someone who can be with her for a lifetime. It's for the best," Manik said all those words breaking his own heart. 

"There is no place for a coward in her life," He murmured hammering each word into coffin he was laying willingly. 

Daadu didn't reply and Manik looked up to see him pacing back and fro. 

"Yeah, right," Daadu said and chuckled. Manik's heart sank more. He was in this pity party where he was the host as well as the guest. He could beat himself but dare anyone else do the same thing. 

"Who knows she would die someday driving on these edgy roads and I wonder what would happen after that," Daadu said bitterly. 

"Why would you say so?" Manik took a step ahead unable to accept what Daadu had said. 

"Anybody can die anytime, you know. Only you aren't privileged to live in pathetic bubble," Daadu taunted and Manik gaped him. 

"It's better you two stay away. You know, it's for the best," Daadu said and Manik felt this unjust anger towards only man he regarded. 

"No," He replied sharply and then realized what he had said. 

"Hell yes," Daadu yelled in Manik's face. 

"She is not a safe person to be with. She drives with her life on wheel, she is one crazy person," Daadu had drawn all his weapons. It was time for him to show mirror to that boy standing in front of him.  

"I care for you too, Son," Daadu said patting Manik's shoulder. Manik had no place to even hide after listening that. 

"It's better you stay away from that hellion," Daadu said bitterly. Manik wanted to retort so bad. He was angry. How could Daadu even say so? His face twitched. 

HELL NO!

He yelled inside his head only to let that ire reach his twitched face. The thought of someone asking him to stay away from her was painful. How was he even trying to do that to themselves till now? He was clueless. 

"Why are you saying such things?" Manik asked unable to hear such words from his beloved Daadu. 

"You have managed to stay away for bloody five days and I am sure you can do it for rest of your life too," Daadu uttered walking back to his chair.

"No," Manik answered and then clutched his own hand behind his back to control the contrast. 

"Why is it hurting you now?" Daadu asked and Manik stayed calm. He was given taste of his own medicine and he didn't know how he would spit it out at first spoon. He wondered how Nandini would have felt. 

"I don't know," Manik murmured in defeat and sat on chair holding his head. 

He heard Daadu standing from his chair and he didn't know what bomb he was about to drop next moment. 

"Now I would say what my stupid son had said," Daadu said in a firm tone, "I don't want you around her and I have better reasons." 

Daadu walked away without giving a chance to Manik. 

"I can't," Manik yelled loud enough for Daadu to hear. He had saved all these retorts for no reason. It felt outright wrong hearing what Daadu had said. 

"Give him a glass of water," Daadu told peon as he walked in corridor. 

He smiled as he made his way out of building. Manik needed this, Daadu believed. It was beyond his belief how that idiot had taken five days and hadn't made a move. Daadu sighed in relief because cadet was going to come out of his little pity party at last.

__________________________

"How could he say like that?" Manik yelled over phone and other side awarded him a silence. 

"Were you smoking weed, Manik?" Harshad yelled from other side of phone as Manik ended telling his sad story. It wasn't even sad in Harshad's opinion, it was plain rubbish. 

"But how could Daadu ask me to stay away from her?" Manik whined without hearing a word Harshad was saying. 

"How could you do what you did to Nandini?" Harshad asked and Manik frowned. 

"I had reasons," Manik still had might to justify his antics. 

"Then I believe Daadu too had reasons," Harshad retorted. 

"I still can't believe it you could be this stupid, Manik," Harshad added. 

Manik sighed closing his eyes only to let out that aloof tear. 

"Gather this shit before it's too late," Harshad said in a calmer tone. 

"You were nobody to decide her life, nor Daadu is," He added with audible certainty. It was beyond his own belief tht someday he could hand over a piece of wise words to someone, He frowned. 

"She would not even see my face," Manik said defeated. 

"She would never let me in," He added and Harshad smiled on other side of phone. 

"Now you are talking," Harshad remarked elatedly. 

"She probably hates me," Manik said finally thinking about the Nandini he knew. He hadn't even for once thought about it till now. 

"You have screwed it, you have to find a way out all by yourself," Harshad said without giving any heed to Manik's tired tone. 

"I'll see you Monday," Harshad and Manik just hummed. 

Manik kept listening dialer tone for a minute or two before putting the receiver down. 

__________________________

"How would you feel, if I told you I loved you?" 

Song kept playing and Nandini was in deep slumber already. File in her hand slipped and met the floor while her head hung loose. Fireplace was company to sweet music and Harlow couldn't go against weather's will. He too had his eyes closed as he soaked the warmth of fire. 

There was nothing special about the night except for a sleeping Nandini who had finally met her sweet slumber. 

Manik took one more step towards that lit building. He had decided how he would just see her once and that would be it. It wasn't easy to call off those nightmares and decide to come out. Manik was walking on street, towards Bernard's rescue center. He hadn't forgotten that one clue Daadu had dropped. He was fool not to make use of it before. His legs trembled as he walked closer. There was too much of noise inside. Yellow light of that glass cabin on first floor, he could feel the pull. He cursed himself one more time for daring to come back to her when he had pushed her hard. But then, just a sight of her, it couldn't harm. 

Manik stood under street light. Three ways met that lit street lamp. Life had started to mock his felony. He was on crossroad. 

He was a lost warrior. He just wished how she was a little tender. 

Nandini moved in her sleep as she her back muscle ached sleeping on that chair. Night was soothing. 

She might not be there.

Thought passed Manik's mind as he kept standing there looking at that lit cabin. He read the board again and all he could read was 'Bernard'.

Just once.

He begged to God. He just wanted to see her once. 

Harlow raised his face from his paw letting out a halfhearted woof. He woofed again faintly and then walked to window pane. Manik finally saw a figure in window and saw a wagging tail. His mouth opened a bit expecting something. 

Harlow barked loudly seeing a figure standing on street at that hour. His woofs got louder and Manik had to run behind an adjacent pillar. Hiding behind pillar of a shop, he looked up only to find the dog barking at him. He cursed his fate. 

"Harlow," Nandini cried in her sleep as Harlow kept barking. 

"What's the matter, pretty boy?" She asked opening her eyes. Harlow wagged his tail as he woofed at someone continuously. Nandini's eyes shot to check the clock. It was 2 in morning and she wondered what could be attracting Harlow's attention at this hour. She got up from her chair and walked to glass window. 

"What's the matter?" Nandini asked as she looked down the street. 

  "She is the sweetest thing that I know

You should see the way she holds me when the lights go low"  

Nandini frowned listening to song behind and she turned to switch it off. But before she could move, Harlow barked again and she again looked down to see what was it. 

There she was.

Manik couldn't believe his eyes as she stood there baffled looking gorgeous than ever. His grip over pillar tightened as he cursed himself for missing on it purposely till now. 

"Nandini"

He murmured only to make himself realize how his wildcat was standing right in front of his eyes. Nandini looked around and he hid behind the pillar. 

She couldn't look more beautiful than this. 

His smile murmured when his lips couldn't let the words out. It was everything. 

Her face was a bit confused as she looked around. She had still worn that killer gaze. Manik shook his head smiling. She had lost weight or what as she looked like faraway dream. Manik bit his lip trying not to cry as he could finally see her. 

"There is nothing, Harlow," Nandini tapped his head and he immediately jumped on her to kiss her angelic face. The little devil with an angel face, Manik chuckled. He envied that dog as he kept kissing her face and all Manik could do was gazing her. 

Nandini walked away from window holding Harlow's paws. Her faint giggles still touched his ears and he smiled more. He could have it for the time being and forever. 

____________________

_____________________________

A/N

Well, well, well!

I am bad at making author notes but I want to thank all my readers for all the love and zeal they bestow on this book and DV as well. I have been getting notifications how some of my lovely readers have nominated my books in The Literary Awards 2017 .

I am humbled. A big thanks for acknowledging my works through this. 

Loads of love

Aditi :)