I'm sad this is ending...

✖

Mabel's voice echoed through Dipper's head.

"She's gone."

He turned around to see that Mabel's not there anymore. She must've left.

You're dead, without him knowing.  Dipper's heart clenches, then he glanced at the book. He saw the cover.

It was covered in F/C paper with colorful designs. It has gems, drawings and a  large font of the title. Looks like it's old and was written by a 4 year old you.

Diary of Y/N L/N

Dipper caressed your name. Y/N. He remembered your eyes, face, laughter and many more. He remembered everything.

Since he's the only one there in the cemetery, he sat down under the tree in front of your grave. Dipper placed the book on his lap and his eyes were looking directly on your name carved on the tombstone.

He started to open the first page.

"Hello, Y/N! I see you've been writing in this book for 30 years now! Hihi ^_^
What am I gonna be when I'm 35 years old? Hehe. Enjoy writing your favorite stuff and crushes! <3 love you, future Y/N!

From: Past Y/N." 

Dipper laughed. How your imaginations as only a 4 year old were crazy as heck.

He turned to the next page and it goes on and on. There were pictures of your family, picture of Christmas, Thanksgiving, 4th of July and New Years'. 

There were also pictures of your little self checking your height as you grow up and your handwriting and penmanship becoming a little more mature.

There were parts when the diary paper got stained by wet marks, meaning that you were crying those days when guys were bullying you.

"In my school here in California, guys would shove me into walls or stuff me in lockers. Those were 4th graders. I wish bullying didn't exist. It's mean and cruel."

Dipper's face softened when he read this. He felt the same way about bullies. They would tease about his birthmark on his forehead and would push him for being weak and noodly.

He proceeded to the next page. Every now and then, Dipper glanced at your stone.

The next page was when you're 6 years old.

"Dear Diary,

Mom convinced me to go to school today since I transferred but I'm afraid. I'm afraid there would be bullies again :(
but Mom said my friends will protect me.
I have friends?

Dipper chuckled lowly.

So I went to school with Mommy while holding her soft hand. Many kids started to look at us so I hide behind Mom. She pat my back as comfort. I love mommy so much.

When we walked inside of classroom, I looked at everyone inside. They were busy and my mom was talking to teacher. She said that I should go play with them. I sit on the ground and no one played with me...

The kids are busy with ther own frends and I'm alone. But someone did. She introduced her name. She said it's Mabel and she also told me her twin brother's name. She said it's Dipper. It's a cute name.

He smiled.

The whole day, Mabel, Dipper and I played with toys. I said goodbye to them and I hope I will see them someday again. Especially with Dipper. Hihi

Love, Y/N."

Dipper flipped the pages again and he saw his name a thousand times. You were sure writing about him when you were 6.

"Me and Dipper hang out on the playground yesterday! He had to push me since there's only one swing. I pushed him too and we switched places! We also talked about mean bullies and classmates and all about our family. I love to hangout with him more."

"I just found a secret hiding place in the park! It was hidden behind bushes and trees but I figured it out! I called Dipper for help and he helped me! Such a great friend...

Anyway, we found our territory! Hahaha! We will hangout in this spot more often."

"Finally, my birthday is here! I'm officially an 8 years old! Hopefully Dipper would give me a present."

"Oh, my gosh! I'm 9! I just lost a tooth but I wish Dipper would still accept me as I am."

"Whaaaat? I'm already 10?! Wow! Dipper said we're going to hang out on our secret spot later! I'M SO EXCITED!"

"11, baby! Mabel said that it's alright if me and Dipper were hanging out together. She also said she has her own best friends. And Dipper gave me a drawing book! Thanks, bestfriends of mine!"

Dipper laughed at the montage of his bestfriend's birthdays. He remembered the time when your and his face were full of icing when Mabel declared a food fight after you blew the candle of your 11 year old cake. You three and the others have to wash for 4 hours to remove the sticky icing. Hahaha good times...

As Dipper proceeded to the 12th birthday, the wind was blowing, but it was a sunny morning. He shrugged it off and read the 12 year old's writing.

"Hey, Diary

Everytime when I hang out with little ol Dipstick, I have this feeling in my stomach whenever he touch me or just talking to me. I don't know why. We're just best friends...

Wait. Is this the thing called 'crush'?

Oh my.

I have a crush on my best friend, Dippy?!"

He remembered the time when you confessed that you like him. Dipper widen his eyes slightly.

"Ye, I have a crush on him.

I was planning to tell him before he leaves. They said that they're going to a place called 'Gravity Falls'. Too bad I can't go with them. Dad said it's too dangerous for me, so I can't go. I want to confess to Dipper that I like him, but I was too shy."

He continued.

"DIARY!!

I finally told Dipper that I like him! And guess what?

He likes me, too!"

Dipper remembered it all. The confession, the hugs, his promise.

His promise.

His promise to come back and be with you.

His promise to not lose communication with you.

To love you and only you...

All of that.

Was just broken.

All for nothing.

Before he knew it, Dipper's eyes were welling with tears. He didn't bother to check the texts from his wife on his phone right now. Dipper was thinking deeply, regretting everything he did and said to you.

"Dear Diary,

Dipper and Mabel finally left. I wish they didn't went to that place and stay with me, but they have to. I can't be with Dipper, but he said that we'll text and call."

"Diary,

Half of the summer, everyday, Dipper and I are texting! I can't believe we're heading the right track!"

"Hey,

Recently, the texts and calls are getting lesser and lesser and I don't know why. I tried to text him, but he'll reply within an hour. I'm getting worried..."

He read every detail that was written on the book and it made him even more hurt since Dipper knew what exactly happened to you through the years he was not there with you, by reading the diary.

The wet marks are getting more visible as Dipper turned to every page. The penmanship are getting more mature and cursive and the additional pages on the book made by yourself made Dipper realized that you were truly alone without him and Mabel.

"I'm officially a teen... but without Dipper and Mabel, no one could celebrate it with me."

"14..."

"15."

"My parents died... their friends came and Mr. and Mrs. Pines. Except for... Dipper and Mabel. Atleast two of the Pines are here, right?"

"17..."

"Why am I crying? I shouldn't be crying over a guy who probably forgotten me.

Oh, no. Here it is again..."

"I'm alone... I could only write to this diary every hour. I have nothing to do for months and years."

Dipper saw your and his picture together as kids when you both went to the park. You were closing your eyes cutely and stucked out your tongue with a peace sign. Dipper was chuckling in the picture and was slightly pulling you by his right arm around your shoulders.

Courtesy of Mabel.

It was captioned, 'Dipper and Me. <3'

Another picture was glued on the page. It was the day of your birthday when you stuffed yourselves with vanilla icing. Your mom took the picture.

You and Dipper were hugging each other while laughing and Mabel was at the back, grinning cheekily while giving the both of you bunny ears. Icings were either on your cheeks, hair, necks, hands and clothes. But nevertheless, you all had fun.

Even if the stinging on his eyes stood out, Dipper paid more attention to the picture and smiled sadly. He remembered all those times and the more he sees your pictures, the more he misses you.

Dipper wanted to apologize to you badly, but knowing that you're already dead, he's too late.

He proceeded to the next page. The page you wrote was when you were already in the hospital in the middle of night and Mabel's not there.

"Hey, Diary

Now I have to tell you everything, huh? Since I didn't wrote a few days ago, I have Mabel to fetch my diary so I have to update you in these few days.

Where to start?

Well... I received a letter a few days ago. I don't want to admit it, but my heart literally shattered when I heard the news."

At the exact place of the word "shattered", Dipper noticed a slight smudge on the paper. The ink was messy, meaning, it was wet by tears.

"When I found out that he was getting married with his fiancee, my insides just fell down on the floor and was immeadiately broken.

So I quickly ran to their house to talk to his twin sister but I know I was already too late. Mabel said I was unconscious when she found me and got me to the hospital.

She talked with the doctor and told me when I woke up that I'm gonna die. And when is that?

The day before Dipper's wedding.

Heartbreaking, but true."

Dipper's tears were slowing from dehydration, but he was still sobbing. He clenched the paper like he couldn't take it. Every details made him more guilty about himself abandoning you.

"Two days before Dipper's wedding and I'm still here, waiting for my due date of death.  I think I'm ready.

And I think I forgive Dipper now. Besides, it's no use to hating him when you're about to die."

Here it is, again. The waterworks. He was near to the end of the book and the handwriting is getting weaker and the pages are more wet with tears.

"I can't believe it. Well, I'm giving this to Mabel when I'm finished writing this.

But, Dipper,"

Dipper leaned more closely to the pages, his heart beating rapidly.

"If you're reading this, I just wanted to say...

I still love you.

I admit it.

And I'm so, so sorry if I couldn't go to your wonderful wedding, witnessing you and your gorgeous wife getting married. I can't be there when I'm dead. The wedding must be beautiful 'cause Mabel helped, huh?

And... if you're crying- probably not- just... if you're crying, then don't. It's not your fault, Dipper. Just take care of your wife. Don't abandon her. You love her, right? Be her happiness, her comfort, her strength. Be there when she needs you. Be there when she's giving birth to your daughter or son. Don't ever, ever leave her. For me."

Even though you're talking to him through a paper, Dipper nodded vigorously, tears continued to run down.

There was another picture. The one when you and Dipper were only 12 years old. A carved heart on the tree of your secret hideout. He then glanced at your tomb once more before looking at the last page of the book.

"I thought I was the one.

I was wrong.

Very wrong."

So that was it, then. Things changed. Dipper stood up and dusted himself before approaching your grave. He kneeled down again.

"Y/N... first off, I just wanted to say... I'm so, so sorry. I know you told me not to cry, I-I can't help it. It's all my fault. I didnlt even glanced at you or text you... and- I-I'm just... so sorry. I thought y-you forgot about me, too a-and found someone else, but no, you didn't. You were still here. I'm glad you're in a happy place now. Thank you for everything, Y/N. I-I-I... I loved you."

There it is again. The strong gust of wind. It was blowing among Dipper's curly brown hair. He can feel it. He felt it. There was a voice.

It was...

It was you.

"I love you, too... Dipper Pines."

✖✖

Sucky ending.

Welp, imma go now 'cause I'll be watching the Gravity Falls Finale again here in the Philippines! Wish me luck for the feels~!

2199 words.