"Welcome to the dream realm. Would you like to explore your past?" The robotic voice asked.

Yes.

"Heading to the ninth grade."

In the dream realm I possess the ability to explore my unconscious state of mind. Tonight, I would like to explore the little memory I possess.

"Now Alexirae, remember to come home right after school." My mom told me. Well a younger version of me. I was nothing more than a hologram watching in the distance. I did not enjoy the sight either. I relived every lonely moment I experienced in the ninth grade. "Alexirae please try to join a team or club or something." My mom pleaded. "I will be working late from now on."

"It's your fault."

I remember now. I felt bad that mom had to switch to nights for more money. I couldn't understand why it was always just us. My mom was never in a relationship because of me. So, I joined track team like she asked. It made her happy because some girls would look after me. It made her happy, until I started running away from home. This time I was faster.

"She'll be better off without you."

Then I would forget where I was going or why I was running in the first place. I always returned home.

Then one day I ran into Jim. Like physically ran into him and broke a $500.00 game system. My mom explained to Jim about my memory condition. Jim agreed to keep an eye on me by letting me volunteer at his store to pay off the system. 

"He's using you." No shit. That's when I started fighting the strange voice.

Jim brought me a phone for my volunteer hours and told me to make alarms to keep me on track. So, I quit the track team. I wanted to volunteer at the shop more.

"Alexirae, can you really trust that man?" My mom was always worried about Jim. Looking back it's kind of funny. That's probably why Jim won't hug me.

By tenth grade I didn't care that I was always alone. Sometimes I would fight with my mom and run off but it wasn't so bad. I always came home. Mom said if I wanted to hang out with Jim I would have to stay on the track team. So, I stayed.

Eleventh grade was going smoothly until I ran into Lachelle. For some reason I kept running into her. I made sure to know her name by then.

I first heard about her in the ninth grade. I was warned by everyone to stay away from her. They told me she hated weird kids and I was a weird kid.

If I knew then what I knew now I would have ignored them. I wouldn't have waited so long to say something. Still fate would have it that I would run into her. Like physically run right into her. And just like Jim, I never forgot her.

Granted everything I do seems to piss her off, she shows me attention. She knows my condition and says she wants to heal me. She lets me play Infinity Quest, showed me cool apps and literally took me to Heaven.

For nothing in return. Right? What does she want from me? All I have ever given her was my time. Is that enough?

"Do you wish to continue?"

No. No I don't.

***

I awoke in my room. My body was aching from all the karate practice. I just want to sleep, or at least stay in my bed.

There was a knock at the door. Pease don't make me move. "Come in." I hate myself. I rolled on my side and watched as Lachelle walked in with pancakes. Pancakes! "You brought me pancakes?!"

Lachelle laughed as she sat next to me. "No I made you pancakes. I put my time and energy in these."

"And love." I said as I tried to struggle to sit up. I watched as Lachelle rolled her eyes at me. "Just rest today okay." Lachelle whispered.

I nodded. I'm not going to protest. I got pancakes and I get to stay in bed.

"Alex I went through your phone." Lachelle told me.

So? There's literally nothing in my phone. Unless I missed something. "Find anything interesting?"

"I saw a text that said, 'You're not safe'". Lachelle said with concern.

"Should I be worried?" I made eye contact with Lachelle. The worried expression she had quickly faded. She probably saw how unfazed I was from a random text. Still to keep her mind at ease. "Besides you were the one who trained me in the art of beating that ass."

I couldn't help but smile when Lachelle started laughing. Still her next words caught me off guard. "I recognized the number. It belongs to Keith."

"Who's Keith?" I can't say I recognize the name.

"Cara's ex-boyfriend." Lachelle answered.

"Who's Cara?" I asked. Lachelle glared at me with that question. "My ex-girlfriend. Come on Alex you actually met her."

"I did?" I joked. Granted I can't say I remembered my encounter with Cara.

"Are you fucking kidding me?" Lachelle mumbled. I couldn't help but laugh at that. I said I was getting better I'm still not perfect. "Get some rest okay. There's something I need to take care of." Lachelle instructed.

I wonder what she needs to take care of.

I ended up falling asleep after Lachelle left. I woke up a few hours later and went to play Infinity Quest in her room.

I elected to defend our stone and put the rest of the experience points I saved in defense. Jim said it was the smartest move for the team since my navigation was so high. It was easier for me to see nearby enemies. I set traps on the route they would possibly take to get to our stone.

I spent the entire time limit setting up traps and I eliminated three opponents. With the time limit almost reach the Infinity Quest War has begun.

I ended up falling asleep in Lachelle's bed. Hopefully she'll wake me when she gets home.

Only she didn't.

I woke up and Lachelle wasn't back. Where's my phone? No messages. It's a little after midnight. She's not answering my calls.

"Shit."

I'm running now. I checked my room. Nothing. The Dojo. No. The dock. No.

I looked off the dock. I could see Camp Willie lights in the distance. I saw a giant building. It stuck out because it was the only light in the dark sky. I couldn't really make it out, but I got an uneasy feeling when I looked at it. Lachelle is there I just know it. I can swim that distance.

As soon as I kicked off my shoe a bright light came from behind me. "Alex?" I turned to face Lachelle. She lowered her flashlight as she approached me. "What are you doing?"

I couldn't help myself as I ran up to her and hugged her tight. Shit. Now I know how my mom feels. "Where were you?" I still feel myself shaking. "I looked everywhere for you."

Lachelle let out a light laugh. "I'm sorry. I was outside smoking. Well trying to smoke. I been losing interest in it lately." I felt Lachelle pull away from me. She gave me a concern look. "Are you okay?"

"Lie to her." 

"Yes." I lied.

Lachelle frowned at me. Then I watched as a wicked smile came across her face. "Are you wearing a sports bra?" I nodded. I'm in danger. "Take your shirt off."

I watched as Lachelle took her shirt off. I felt as if my heart was going to beat out of my chest. As the moonlight hit her body it glistened off her skin highlighting her features. I wasn't surprise that she was physically fit. I was surprised when she started tying her hair up. She walked passed me to the dock bumping me on purpose. The view from behind was amazing too.

"Come on Alex." Lachelle called.

I followed Lachelle to the dock. I saw where Lachelle threw her shirt and shoes. I decided I should toss mine. It is probably safer for me to leave my phone here too.

I saw that Lachelle got into the row boat. She motioned me to follow, so I did. We rowed the boat out to the middle of the lake. I got distracted by the night sky. The sky was clear so I was able to see all the stars. I then noticed that the big building over by camp Willie turned its lights off. 

"Why did you bring me out here?" I had to ask.

"Two reasons." Lachelle started. "I wanted to practice my balance by sparing with you on a boat."

Typical. I stood up on the boat. There was little room to maneuver in it. This is literally a game of balance.

"New Quest Obtained: Eliminate Challenger." The robotic voice announced.

"Don't you want to know my other reason?" Lachelle asked me as she stood up. 

"Not really." I answered. I know you want to kick me in the face.

I got into a fighting stance. I tried to mimic my character on Infinity Quest. I may not know how to fight like Lachelle, but I do know that I'm not getting in that cold ass water.

I went blow for blow with Lachelle as the boat rocked uncontrollably. I'm honestly mad at her. She could have told me. She could have woken me up. Instead of talking we are literally fighting.

"You can't be mad Alex you lied to her. She has no idea how you feel. Besides, you are living the pain that you caused others. You are the source of everyone's pain around you." Shut up. "Think of all the pain you caused your mother. Think of all the pain you caused Jim."

I was able to block Lachelle's punch with my left arm. She looked up into my eyes at that moment. Her eyes that were filled with rage suddenly filled with concern. I know I lost control and am showing my emotions.

I kicked Lachelle in the stomach and she fell out the boat. I hit my knees as the tears streamed down my face. I was so scared. I thought Lachelle ran off because that's something I would do. I can't keep running away when things get hard. I can't.

My attention broke when Lachelle climbed back in the boat.

"Lachelle I." I looked at Lachelle who was shivering and smiling. "Are you sure you never had any training before me?" Lachelle asked.

I stood up and hugged her. There's something about her smile that keeps me calm. I felt her shiver against my chest. "I always wanted to fight under the moonlight. Like they do in those karate movies." Lachelle told me.

"What karate movies are you watching?" I asked as I let go of Lachelle. I saw her roll her eyes at me as I walked back to my side of the boat. I then entered my fighting stance.

"Are you sure you want more?" Lachelle giggled. 

"Well you haven't gotten me wet yet." I teased.

Lachelle frowned. "Bullshit." I felt my eyes grow wide to Lachelle's comment. Sexual. She meant that as a sexual joke. Wait, was that a joke?

As I was lost in my thought Lachelle did her famous spin kick and kicked me clean in the face off the boat. Thankfully the water was freezing because my body was burning after that comment.

When I swam to the edge of the boat I saw Lachelle leaning over the edge laughing. "Looks like I got you wet." Great. Now she's teasing me.

When I tried to pull myself into the boat I felt Lachelle put her hand on my face. When I looked up at her, she quickly pressed her lips against mine. I closed my eyes as I tried to enjoy the moment. Then I heard that voice. 

"Flip her in the water."

I normally would ignore the voice, but I'm really tired of this kicks for kisses bullshit. So, I pulled Lachelle in the lake.

I'll take my beating like a champ.

***

I officially believe that Lachelle has given up on keeping me out of her bed at night. I personally believes that she likes it, but is too prideful to admit it. Tonight she slept with her back tuned to me. I thought she was mad when I pulled her into the water, but she is letting me hold her.

My birthday is the day of the competition. To think that it's only been a month since I met Lachelle. It feels so much longer. I wonder if it has been longer. If we were ever like this before. 

Geeze I can't remember how we met. I hope I wasn't an idiot. I hope I wasn't weird. I hope she likes me the way I like her.

The sound of Lachelle breathing was like a lullaby to my ears, as I drifted off into sleep.

***

"Welcome to the Dream Realm. Would you like to continue?" 

Yes. 

"Please pick a door. The truth behind the voices or The Truth behind Lachelle."

So, there I was. With a life changing decision. In this moment I have a choice. Would I rather find the truth about myself or Lachelle?

What's more important to you? Well what do I already know? I decided to meditate in the Dream Realm to try to find an answer.

In ninth grade I was the weird kid, but I wasn't the only one. Lachelle's name whispered off the lips of bullies just like mine. The whispers spoke of fear when Lachelle's name was brought up. They spoke of a rival camp and fighting.

In the tenth grade I was still the weird kid. The whispers gotten stronger, but sometimes there was no one around.

Whispers of Lachelle grew too. Something about secrets that weren't kept and hearts that were broken. She earned the nickname La-bitch. People warned me to stay from her. I'm the type of girl she likes to target. I thought they were looking out for me. They weren't.

In the eleventh grade there were whispers of beating up Lachelle. The whispers came the same day I ran into her. The day she burned me with a cigarette.

"Alex?"

That wasn't meant for me. She was scared because they were trying to beat her up. There were whispers of Lachelle wanting to hang out with the weird kid because she was desperate for friends.

"Alex."

I was the weird kid. No. I was probably the only kid who didn't talk behind her back and showed her kindness to her face, and I'm sure someone saw us. The day we went for doughnuts. I'm sure there were whispers. Whispers that pushed her over the edge. Whispers about me. Whispers about those girls that they didn't want out.

I have been hearing these whispers for years. What are these pieces that I am missing?

"Alexirea!"

The only smile I ever received in those crowded halls came from her.

"She likes girls so be careful."
"Same sex relationships are wrong."
"She is a trained killer. Keep your distance."
"She's a bitch."
"La-bitch."

I heard the sound of my alarm. "

Please pick a door. The truth behind the voices, or the truth behind Lachelle." I stood up between both doors.

"This is your Dream Realm is it not?" I turned to see Maindo. Honestly I'm not even surprised at this point. 

"What door should I pick Sensei?"

"Kioku behind these doors are your truths. You don't need to enter the room to know what's inside. You just need to trust your name and focus on what's inside you." Maindo spoke.

Kioku means memory.

"Please pick a door. Self-doubt or Abandonment."

I stood there in shock as the names of the doors changed. Is this the truth behind me and Lachelle? No. That makes no sense.

"Koi Kioku. Ikari is waiting." Maindo said. I watched as he vanished. Even in my dreams the old guy is bad ass.