'Wapas chala jaun? Abhi to aaya hun..'
Rohit frowned, puzzled by what she was saying.

'I meant, wapas shift hojao wahan..apne ghar..'
Sonakshi said.

Rohit looked at her, trying to guess if she was serious or was just saying this because she was upset over something (which was beyond him, right now).

'Kyun? Tumhe problem ho rahi hai mere yahan rehne se?'
Rohit repeated her question.

'Nahin to..mein to tumhare liye bol..'

'Mere liye? But, don't you see I'm happy here? Being with you, and our children? I don't care where we live, as long as it's together!'
Rohit's tone was firm.

'Mein to keh rahi thi..'

'Jo bhi keh rahi ho, meri samajh mein nahin araha hai. We were fine till the evening, when I called..'
He stopped, as he noticed a slight change in her expression.
'Does this have to do with me going to my place, and not coming here?'

'Ridiculous! Aisa kuch nahin hai..'
Sonakshi burped the baby, and made to move off the bed. But, Rohit kept sitting there, not letting her move.

'Sona, mein tum se baat kar raha hun. Problem kya hai? Bataogi nahin to solution kaise niklega?'

'Rohit! Problem koi bhi nahin hai. I just wanted you to be free to do what you want. Not feel stifled or obligated..'

'Kya bolay ja rahi ho? Stifled? Obligated? Aise words hamare beech mein kyun? I'm your husband, you are my wife! Why would I ever feel stifled or obligated..'

'Rohit! You are not getting my point..'

'Which is what exactly?'
Rohit looked annoyed now, not being able to understand what was going on here.

'I..I don't know how to explain it. I've said what I wanted to..'

'Which amounted to confusing me more than I wanted to be..'
He got up suddenly.
'I think you are sleep deprived..and should catch up on your sleep, before Mishaye wakes up again. As for me, I also have a call time at 8, and it's already past 1..'

Sonakshi looked at him, a bit taken aback by his sudden change in the conversation.
Rohit moved away to the other side of the bed, while Sonakshi settled the baby back in the cot.
By the time Sonakshi came back to the bed, Rohit had laid down on his side, his arms around Arihaan, his eyes closed.

'Rohit..'
She whispered. But he didn't respond.
Sonakshi laid down on her side, but facing away from him.
Rohit opened his eyes to look at her, but closed them again, as she turned to glance at him one more time.

I don't know what's bothering you, but I will surely find out..now is just not the right time..
They were Rohit's last thoughts, as he drifted off to sleep.

***************************

'Sona! Aise kaise chalega? Tum apna khayal nahin rakhogi to bachon ka kaise rakhogi?'
Suman held out a plate, but Sonakshi didn't take it, instead, scrunched her nose.

'Ma! Please! Sach mein mann nahin kar raha. Jab karega to kha lungi, pakka!'
Sonakshi looked irritated, just like she had been looking for the past four days, over every little thing.

Suman was getting concerned, and so was Rohit, who had had to suddenly go for an out of city shoot. Since it was several hours away from Mumbai, it was just practical for him to stay there, instead of travelling back and forth every day.
He had expressed his worry to her, and asked Suman to take extra care of Sonakshi since he wasn't able to.

'Pata nahin, ajeeb sa behave kar rahi hai. Har baat mein irritation, ghussa. Arihaan ko bhi daanta..aise to pregnancy ke doraan karti thi..magar ab to sab theek hai na, to phir kyun..or mujhe bhi abhi hi jaana parra door.'
Rohit had been really upset.

'Rohit! I'll keep an eye on her. Tum araam se kaam karo.'

Suman had assured him at the time, but it seemed as if it was in vain. Sonakshi was being mule headed over the smallest of things, be it something she had to do for Arihaan, or it was to eat something.
Suman had shifted back to sleep with her, while Rohit was gone, and had seen how Sonakshi would lie awake, even when Mishaye didn't need her. As a result, she was just getting dark circles under her eyes, and was beginning to look tired and fatigued.

'Sona! Kya baat hai?'
Suman asked her for the umpteenth time, now.

'Kon si baat? Kuch bhi to nahin!'
Was her patent answer, even now.

'I don't believe that for one minute! Ma hun tumhari. Sab jaanti hun, dekh rahi hun.'

'Kuch bhi dekhne jaisa nahin hai. Or aap itna na sochain. I'm fine..'

'Rohit ki yaad arahi hai? Iss liye yeh sab kar rahi ho? Cranky ho? Ajaayega jaldi..'

'Aisa kuch nahin hai. Mujhe uss ke jaane se kyun problem hogi..uss ka kaam hai..'
Sonakshi lifted Mishaye in her arms, and got up to leave the living room. But she quickly turned back.
'Or han, har khabar Rohit ko dene ki zaroorat nahin hai! Bohot dosti paayi ja rahi hai aajkal..'

'Tumhara husband hai! Uss se kyun kuch chupaana hai? Kab se call kar raha hai, baat to karo..Sona!'
Suman chided her, but Sonakshi just ignored her and left from there, leaving Suman looking after her.

***************************

In her room, Sonakshi sat against the headboard of the bed, and closed her eyes.

Kya hogaya hai mujhe? Sab se itna rude..Ma se..itna rude kaise behave kar sakti hun?

Sonakshi sighed, and getting up, walked to the terrace window.
There was a bite in the air, and Sonakshi wrapped her arms around herself.

Rohit! I'm sorry! Tumhare saath bhi kar rahi hun aisa..but I'm helpless. Jaan boojh ke nahin kar rahi kuch. Agar maine control nahin kiya, to I know I'll land up with depression!

Sonakshi had spoken to Dr. Asha just a day before, who had asked her that, when Sonakshi had told her of her loss of appetite and loss of interest.
She was taking care of the baby well, doing everything for her. But she had been feeling, that she was neglecting Arihaan in the process.
He would come to her and she would dismiss him, on the pretext of looking after Mishaye, either to bathe her, feed her, or put her to sleep. That was scaring her to hell.

Expressing her fears to Dr. Asha had helped, who had warned her to take care or she might end up having postpartum depression.
Sonakshi was well aware of the damage that could do, and she really didn't want to get sucked into it. So she had asked Dr. Asha for any medications that might help, and she had prescribed them.

'Ring! Ring!'

Sonakshi was pulled out of her thoughts, as her phone rang.
She hurried to where she had put it on the nightstand, before Mishaye woke up from the sound.

'Hello?'

'I miss you!'
Rohit's voice came across the line, and instantly made her want to cry.

Get a grip, Sona!

'Sona? You there?'
His voice came again, concerned.

'Yes!'
Her voice came out squeaky, as she tried to keep the tears at bay, and she quickly cleared her throat.
'Yes! Yes! I'm here!'

Rohit heard her voice, and knew something was wrong,  immediately.
'Sona! Kya hua hai? Tum ro rahi thi? Tum theek to ho? Arihaan? Mishaye? Kya..'

'Sab theek hain, relax!'
Sonakshi quickly assured him.

'Lag to nahin raha! Batao mujhe, kya hua hai? Tum theek to ho? Tabyat kharab..'

'Chaaho to Ma se pooch lo! Deti hain na pal pal ki khabar tumhe!'
She retorted, and immediately felt guilty, as he became quiet.
'I'm fine, Rohit! Tabyat theek hai..'

Rohit had become quiet, because indeed, it was Suman who had told him, that she wasn't eating, and getting irritated.
'Okay, theek hai..how was your day? I'm really missing Arihaan, Mishaye. Un ke saath waqt kaise guzarta hai, pata nahin chalta! I can't wait to get back to them.'

Sonakshi wanted to ask if he  missed her that much, and wanted to see her, too, but she didn't.
'Han, Arihaan har waqt tumhe yaad karta rehta hai. Or Mishaye, uss ne bhi to tumhari awaaz ab pehchaan li hai..'

'Or tum?'
He interrupted.

'Mein? Mein kya?'

'Tum mujhe yaad nahin kar rahi?'
She could actually hear him pouting, and unknowingly, a smile came to her face.

'Jitna apparently tum kar rahe ho!'
Sonakshi sounded put out.

'That's great! Kyunke, mein to hadd se zyada kar raha hun..'

'But you just mentioned Mishaye and Arihaan..'

'To? Tum to mere dil mein rehti ho, har pal. To bhoolne ka sawaal hi nahin uth ta..'

'Hmm..'

'To matlab, tum bhi na?'
Rohit asked.

'Mein bhi kya?'

'Sona! Bologi nahin ke mujhe miss kar rahi ho? Mere bina kuch acha nahin lag raha? Because, I sure as hell, feel that way!'
Rohit insisted.

'Han..wahi..tum kab arahe ho wapas?'
Sonakshi shook her head at herself.

That had not been what he had wanted to hear, but knew that he had to be there to get through to her.
'I'll probably be there by tomorrow if everything goes on schedule.'

'Okay..great..'
She said, but her tone did not match the sentiment.

'Tum ne kuch khaya?'
Rohit shifted the topic.

'Aray! Har koi mere khaane ke peechay parra hua hai..kha lungi jab bhook lagegi..'

'Or woh kab lagegi? Kal, parso? Do din baad?'
He said with sarcasm.

'Mein koi choti bachi hun, ke aise sawaal kar rahe ho..'

'Nahin, magar choti bachi hai to ek tumhari..who needs to be fed. And if you don't feed yourself, how do you expect her to stay healthy?'
Rohit tried a different tactic to get her to agree.
'Or agar maine dekha, that you have fallen short in taking care of Mishaye, then I'm sorry, I'll just have to put her on bottle feed, and you know better than I do, how important it is for her to be fed by you..'
Rohit continued, unaware of Sonakshi's eyes widening, at his words.

'No way! I'm not putting her on bottle feed..I..'

'Then go! And eat something! And if you know that Ma has been informing me of everything, then you should know, that I'll find out the truth..sooner or later.'

'Dhamki de rahe ho?'
Sonakshi was getting irritated now.

'Jo tum samjho..I have to go now..'

'Okay..bye..'
Sonakshi was about to move the phone from her ear, when he spoke again.

'Sona!'

'Hmm..'

'Please..kuch kha lo..khud ke liye nahin, to meri khaatir..please..'
His tone was soft now.
'I love you..'

'I'll try..'
Sonakshi relented, not wanting him to stay worried.

'Good girl..talk to you later..bye..'

Sonakshi sat there, on the bed, long after the call disconnected.

I miss you, Rohit..and I do need you..I want to be normal too..
God! Please, help!

***************************

His work was delayed for another two days.

Just my luck!
Jab mujhe laga ke ab baat sambhal rahi hai, to yeh or delay!
Damn! I so wanted to be with Sona right now!

Suman had told him, that Sonakshi was making an effort, trying to eat, smile more, sleep more, after having spoken to him.
Rohit had been so worried the day Suman had told him of her refusal to eat, and her attitude, that he had requested the director to take his shots, and let him go back.
But, unfortunately, luck hadn't been on his side, and some clips had been deleted by mistake.

But now, he was finally through, and although he had spoken to Sonakshi this morning, he hadn't told her that he was on his way back.

Shayad surprise se khush hojaye..

He looked down at the bouquet of red roses that he had just bought for her, and inhaled them, a smile on his lips.

I'm coming, Sona! I'm coming!

***************************

Sonakshi had the weirdest feeling in the pit of her stomach since morning.

She ignored it, as she went about her work, bathing and taking care of Mishaye.
Although the nanny was looking after Arihaan, Sonakshi was making it a point to take care of his needs as well.
Ever since she had spoken to Rohit that night, and decided to take things in her hands, she was determined to fight any sort of depression, that could undo her.

Rohit! Kab aaoge? I really miss you..kaash tumhara kaam delay na hota..I need you, with me..

Sonakshi had had breakfast, and even taken the fruits that Suman had cut for her, but she still felt slightly lightheaded.

'Kya hua, Sona? Tabyat theek nahin hai?'
Anil asked, as Sonakshi stood up from where she had been teaching something to Arihaan.

'I'm okay, Papa! Shayad thora thak gayi hun..'
Sonakshi frowned.

'To jao, thora rest kar lo. Arihaan ko Madhu dekh rahi hai, or Mishaye bhi yahan so rahi hai. Ma kitchen mein hain, abhi ajayengi. Or mein, yahin paper parh raha hun. So relax! Jao..'

Sonakshi nodded. She really felt like lying down. She started climbing the stairs, and held onto the bannister, as a wave of dizziness passed over her.
Sonakshi held her head, and continued climbing up.

'Baba! Baba!'
The sound of Arihaan's sudden shout, had her spin around fast.

Her heart leapt in her throat, as she saw Rohit enter, a big bouquet of roses in his hand, his bag slung over his shoulder, hugging Arihaan, as he ran to him.

'Rohit!'
Sonakshi whispered, a smile making its' way to her lips, on seeing him and the roses, as she made to go back down the stairs.

Suddenly, everything happened in a blur, as she felt the stairs and the room spin.
Instead of her foot landing on the steps, she missed it.

'SONAAAA!'

She heard Rohit scream, as if from a distance, as everything blacked out, and she went tumbling down the stairs.

To be continued...