(Ok, this one got REALLY weird because I had multiple sleep deprived thoughts clashing against each other, forming some weird amalgamation. You have been warned.

...I mean, all Crack of Ruina chapters are made from thoughts that my brain make while lacking sleep but still, this one is weirder than usual. You have been warned.)

Inside the Library, within a certain room separated from the rest of this odd construction, Angela's assistant was resting on a chair that offered a nice cushion to sit on. No words echoed, only the peaceful silence. His eyes were locked onto the ceiling, calmly watching the Light above his head.

He blinked, took a deep breath and finally exhaled, emptying the content of his lungs. The noises originating from him sounded like a soft breeze passing by, complimenting the cozy air around.

It truly was the pinnacle of silence. For once, the worker could enjoy a moment of rest and silence.

...

So of course, someone has to be an asshole and interrupt his break because otherwise, what would be the point of this chapter?

Oh, speaking of an asshole-

Angela: Y/N, I need your decision on which dress I should wear for our wed- wait a second, what's this?

Y/N: Hm?

The agent tilted his head to the side, completely ignoring the first part of her sentence. At this point, he was used to it.

A frown formed on the director's face. Without any hesitation, she immediately repeated her question as a way to firmly slam it into his skull. He rolled his eyes out of annoyance and raised his right hand.

Y/N: It's a smoking pipe, got one from the Smiling Faces as a gift.

Angela: I'm not talking about that. What's this?

Not pleased by the answer she got, she raised a finger towards a second seat next to him. For a brief moment, the poor man was immobile until his head turned to follow where she was pointing.

Right by his side, a woman with long silver hair was resting in the chair beside him. A black headband was present in them, an accessory that matched rather well with the black dress she was wearing. A pair of dark high heels were barely visible under the long skirt. Her eyes were closed and a smoking pipe was also in her hands.

The assistant blinked once and faced the AI ruining his moment of peace with a shrug.

Y/N: Dunno what you're talking about, it's just a normal room.

Angela: Y/N, don't play dumb with me, I know you can see her, you looked AT her.

Y/N: Yea, because it's more interesting than staring at the clown in front of me.

The air immediately froze the moment his words pierced her. Her eyes locked into his and remained unblinking for a good 2 minutes. Not willing to be defeated by her, the man replied with his own gaze.

Calmly sitting next to them, the unknown person took a good breath in her pipe and let out a cloud of smoke in the air... more precisely in Angela's face. Now that the line of contact was broken, both sides looked back at the third party.

Y/N: Good work.

???: No problem.

The duo sitting together exchanged a fistbump in front of the machine with slightly obsessive thoughts, causing her system to go haywire. Her already cold eyes became empty upon witnessing this.

In order to calm herself, she took a moment to quell her murderous rage and finally spat it out with the only way she knew how.

Angela: Fuck you Ayin.

Fuck you too.

Angela: Y/N, who's this woman and why should I not murder her right now? I'm giving you 10 seconds.

Sensing the daggers pointed at his cranium, the victim of Angela's tantrum lowered his head and heaved a sigh.

Y/N: Fine, if you're gonna be a pain in the ass, I might as well say it.

Before beginning his explanation, the assistant took another dose of smoke from the object he was holding and let it all out as a way to cleanse his emotions. He was here to relax after all and he was planning to commit to his decision.

Y/N: There's not much to talk about buuuut... she's my E.G.O.

The previously tense atmosphere shattered under the pressure. Time seemed to have stopped for a moment and nobody moved during this awkward period of complete stillness. One side was expressing no reaction while the other comprised of only the Pale Librarian was unable to process the information.

Angela: ...What.

Y/N: What do you mean "What"? There's not much to question, I just gave you the answe-

Angela: Y/N, I know that you like to fuck with me but even I'm not stupid, what did you do?

Y/N: For once I'm not... or am I?

As he raised an eyebrow with a little grin forming on his lips, the air next to his left ear shattered, torn apart by the director's attack. His heart stopped for a moment until he realized that she missed on purpose.

Y/N: Ok ok, I'm not!

Angela: Explain.

Y/N: Well... when a papa E.G.O and a mama E.G.O love each other very much, they-

Angela: I will rip your nuts off with my bare hands.

Y/N: ...It was the Light.

The man immediately replied while covering the space between his legs. In response, the AI in charge of the Library placed a hand against her face as she mumbled to herself, clearly annoyed.

Angela: I hate the fact that it's a valid answer for everything.

Y/N: Hey, I'm not the one who decided to call it the "Light of Possibilities", don't complain to me.

After stating this fact, Angela's assistant turned his head to look at the lady resting next to him. Her eyes lazily opened and revealed a dark color in them. Her gaze was distant, as if looking at something that didn't exist.

A little worried about this, the man grabbed her shoulder and shook it lightly.

Y/N: Uh... you good?

???: ...My head hurts, too much smoke.

Her soft whisper was immediately followed by her letting out a terrifying cough that released the entirety of what was once safely stored in her lungs. A massive cloud of smoke rose into the air, making the duo observing this lean away.

This show of inelegance completely ruined the mood formed a few minutes ago. However, it was enough to snap her out of her trance. Her gaze shone a light that previously wasn't there a moment ago.

Now mostly back in control, the lady in a dress crossed her legs and glanced at the AI in front of her. An interrogation mark flew above her head and a question that should have never been asked in front of the director came out.

???: ...I don't remember a threesome happening today.

Angela: I've heard enough, I'm tearing her head off.

The following second, a blur went through Y/N's vision, going from one side to the other. Taken aback by the sudden color blinding him, the assistant blinked and when he turned his head, what he saw was the obsessed machine strangling the person he called his "E.G.O". In return, she did the same.

A second blink was needed for him to understand what just happened and by the time the third one arrived, he leaned further into his seat with an uninterested expression.

Y/N: At least I'm not the one getting hurt this time. That's a win for me~

...

...

Alter Ego: ...So does that explain the burn marks on your hands?

Y/N: Oh no, I tried to shove my fist inside Scorched Girl's mouth to test if it was hot. Turns out it is.

A few hours have passed since the incident that was described 10 lines ago. The heat of the battle had time to subside and now, a meeting was held. All gathered around a table, a group of employees were discussing with each other.

Dana: ...Why would you even think about that?

Y/N: I dunno, my mind is weird. Also this series being an extended shitpost doesn't help my braincells.

The man in the center of the conversation shrugged and took a sip of the drink inside the cup he was holding, pleased with the fact that he made an Abnormality eat his entire fist purely out of curiosity.

Y/N: Thanks for the coffee Chesed!

Chesed: The pleasure's mine, don't hesitate to ask for more~

The Patron librarian dressed in blue sent a wave back at the group resting on his floor and returned to making more coffee, a smile on his face.

Sitting to the right of the man with burnt hands, Morgan silently drank her own cup and frowned slightly before glancing back at her neighbour.

Morgan: ...Did that really happen?

Acting as the voice of reason, the only one in this insane alternate timeline, the girl working with Roland asked Angela's assistant about what happened. The only thing she got in return was a chuckle from him.

He emptied his burning cup of coffee in one gulp, spat it all over the table upon realizing that and looked back at her.

Y/N: Do you see a girl dressed in a goth dress in this room? Of course not, I'm just pulling things out of my ass.

Cereb: ...Must be a big one if you can pull so deep.

Y/N: Why do you think Angela forces me to wear her stupid clothes? It's because she doesn't want anyone to see my pristine rear except her.

Alter Ego: ...It's a nice view, I can confirm.

The usually shy girl let out a remark with a slight smirk before blowing off the steam of her drink. The man's face slowly turned red and laughs spread around the room. Unfazed by it, Alter Ego calmly emptied her own cup.

Once she did, she returned her gaze to the flushed ex-captain.

Y/N: H-Hey, I didn't need you to confirm that.

Hava: As a second witness, I can also confirm~

Y/N: Hava!

???: Can you guys shut up, I don't want to hear about ass while drinking coffee!

Suddenly, before the conversation could go into a weird direction, a voice that did not belong in the group snapped. Every pair of eyes turned towards the origin of it and saw a man sitting at Chesed's bar, his own drink resting next to him and a cigaret in one of his hands. A lighter was placed next to his cup.

Said smoker looked completely disgusted, which was understandable considering that they were forced to hear about someone's ass for a good 5 minutes.

Finally remembering that they existed, Angela's slave called out to them.

Y/N: Oh hey Zeta, I didn't know you were a smoker.

Zeta19: This was supposed to be my cameo episode before my introduction in the story but you had to ruin it by talking about pulling stuff out of your butt.

The clerk sighed and lit up the cigaret that he was holding before taking a good breath.

A faint chuckle came out from Chesed's mouth as he watched the man sitting at his bar expel a large amount of smoke from his throat.

Chesed: I would suggest you finish your cup before smoking, you might be surprised by the taste otherwise-

Zeta19: Fuck off.

Chesed: No thanks~

The man who once worked in Binah's department crushed the cigaret butt in the palm of his hands and tossed it in a nearby bin, earning a few "ouch"-es from the group around the table during the process.

Completely ignoring the cup that was served for him, the moody employee walked towards the exit but not without giving a disappointed look at Angela's assistant.

...

...

A long and awkward silence followed after the departure of the clerk of the Extraction team. With the exception of breathings, not a single sound could be heard. In order to prevent the atmosphere from getting too tense, one member spoke up to change the subject.

Dana: So... how many experiments have you done with Abnormalities? You know, beside the "punch Scorched Girl in the throat" idea.

Y/N: Hm... I don't tend to remember a lot of them.

Hava: ...'A lot of them?'

The man placed one of his fingers against the rim of his cup and followed the edge of it as he pondered on the question. One thing was certain though: the answer would most definitely be dumb

...Not that anyone was expecting something sane to come from his mouth.

Y/N: One time I tried to set mister edgy marksman and little red on a date, didn't turn out so well. Angela found out that I did that and slammed my head into a table before dragging me into a dark corner.

Alter Ego: She did WHAT?!

Hava: ...Uh, let's move on before Alter Ego goes into a panic attack.

Y/N: I think one of the funniest ones I had was the breeding experiment with Queen of Hatred-

As soon as the word "breeding" & "Queen of Hatred" came out in the same sentence, a loud cough echoed. Everyone turned just in time to see Morgan choke on her sip, her face quickly turning blue.

A firm slap from Hava on the back, however, was all she needed to bring the coffee back into the right pipe.

Morgan: B-Breeding experiment?

Y/N: I mean, yea, that's what I said.

Amidst the shock shared by everyone present, one person pinched the bridge of their nose and took a deep breath. Y/N observed the scene in front of him with question marks floating above his head.

Y/N: She turns into a snake, I just wanted to see if she could lay eggs.

Dana: How? Tell us, how did you... what thought process led you to this?

Y/N: I woke up one day.

Dana: Ok.

Y/N: I thought about Nothing There and said to myself: "Hey, that's almost a dog".

Dana: Uh-uh.

Y/N: Then Queen of Hatred sent me a greeting and I thought to myself: "Hm, she's a snake".

Dana: Uh...

Y/N: After that, I remembered that snakes lay eggs and tried to see if she could too.

The ex-captain of the Central Command team calmly explained everything like it was the most natural thing in the world. All around him, expressions of confusion were looking back at him in complete silence.

Acting as the voice of the group, Dana raised an eyebrow and continued her questions.

Dana: So... did you-?

Y/N: Of course not, I'm a pure boy... if we ignore each attempts Angela try to pull to have sex with me.

Alter Ego: Yea, thankfully none of them work so that's a relief for me.

Hava: Really? I thought the final part of the first chapter of this series led to that.

Y/N: Nope, I slipped out while she wasn't looking, which explains why she's cranky most of the time.

Chesed: Mhm, it was quite a display of prowess, Gebura would be proud~

The Patron librarian joined the conversation from behind his bar as he blended coffee beans. A bead of sweat fell from Dana's forehead while Hava was still focused on the girl sitting next to her.

With closed eyes, the completely insane employee explaining his weird reasoning continued his absolutely delirious rambling.

If this were a normal world, someone would probably knock him out and drag him to an asylum but sadly, everyone else is just as weird as him in different aspects.

Y/N: Another experiment I tried was to throw myself into a beam of the Light, just to see what would happen.

Dana: ...Are you TRYING to end yourself on purpose?

Y/N: ...Honestly, I don't know anymore. Angela existing is enough to give me depression.

Dana: Anyway, what happened after?

Y/N: Well...

...

"Holy shit, holy shit, holy shit. Ayiiiiiin, Y/N's here!! I can't believe this is happening!"

...This is confusing as fuck, I'm narrating a flashback that I also participate in. What am I supposed to do? Do I still narrate or I repeat what past me said with no narration?

My head hurts, I didn't ask for this shit.

Fuck you Angela... and also fuck you Carmen for making this more complicated than necessary.

"Ayiiiiiin, hide the body pillows and the pictures!"

Do that yourself you lazy bum!

Ahem- While this conversation was happening, Y/N was simply left speechless. His entire surroundings were simply made of a bright light that he could barely face without flinching.

All around him the voices of both a woman and flashback me echoed around, overwhelming his senses.

God this is a pain to do, let's hope I don't have to narrate much of this flashback.

Y/N: ...Carmen? What are you doing here?

"...Oh my god, you remembered me! I thought for sure Angela would have tried to do something about that."

Y/N: Uh... where are we?

The visibly confused protagonist looked around, barely able to keep his eyes open. Standing in front of him, the familiar figure of the lady known as Carmen showed a bright smile while her red eyes looked back at him-

"Ayin, stop narrating so loudly, I'm having a private moment with Y/N!"

...

...

Wait, is she talking to present me narrating the flashback or she speaking to past me narrating the conversation while present me is also doing the same? This is- Ok, you know what, I'm not doing this!

End of flashback, I've decided this!

...

Y/N: ...

Dana: ...

Alter Ego: ...

Hava: ...I guess that's one way to stop it.

Anyway, moving on from this awkward conversation-

Slightly disappointed that his own flashback was cut short due to... external forces, Y/N stood up from his seat and made his towards the door.

His head turned to look back at the group and his left hand pointed at Alter Ego, who also pointed at herself in confusion.

Y/N: Meet me in 10 minutes in a secluded room.

Alter Ego: H-Heh?!

Those were the final words our main character spoke before taking his leave from both Chesed's floor AND the current chapter of this side series.

Left completely bewildered by the sudden request given to her by her lover, the shy maiden's face turned red as she hid herself with her hands.

As teasing as ever, Hava revealed a wide grin and leaned closer, her lone red eye which was not hidden by her bang shone. Both of them had a good idea of what he was planning and had opposite reactions.

...

Dana: This is a mess.

Morgan: ...If I knew this would happen... I would have stayed in my room.

Chesed: Haha, it wasn't completely terrible, you have to see the light in everything, no matter how small it is~

Morgan: ...Sounds too hard, I'll pass.

Dana: I'm gonna get drunk to forget about the conversation we just had, it's probably for the best.

Yesod's helper was the second person to leave their seat and exit the room. Soon after, Morgan jumped out of the story, not wanting to be there for any further shenanigans. She had reached her maximum for today and she wasn't about to step over her personal line.

Finally, Alter Ego & Hava walked out, leaving the coffee master on his own. A calm smile was on his face, despite all the chaos that unfolded a few feet away from him.

Chesed: What a lively group, they never seem to lack any energy~

???: You can say that.

Not expecting to hear someone respond to his comment, the man dressed in blue stopped what he was doing and turned his gaze to the entrance. His surprise quickly melted away once he realized who was there.

Chesed: Oh, Zeta was it?

Zeta19: Yea, I only came back for the coffee.

The clerk sat down at the bar and looked at the now empty floor. A sigh of annoyance emerged, which was followed by an empty cup being placed in front of him.

Chesed: I must be honest, I wasn't expecting you to return so soon.

Zeta19: I'm mostly here to remind readers that I exist.

The gloomy worker rolled his eyes and took a sip of the freshly served coffee he was given. As expected, the heat took him aback for a second but he still forced himself to gulp down the sip he took.

Once he did so, he turned to confront you.

Zeta19: Look forward to my future appearance! Anyway, that's all I have to say, bye for now!

(I told you all that this chapter was weirder than the previous ones.)