Bad Boys VS Me
By
@XxTVSxX

Title -8/10

The title is working well. It sums up the story and creates interest.

Cover-4/5

The new cover is my favourite that I've seen on your book so far! I love that it isn't just the typical "post a picture and add a title". One can definitely see that a lot of work has gone into it and it pays off!

Blurb-3/5

The blurb starts off well but generally I think it gets a little too long and it gets a bit fragmented because of the way that you've set it up into the different sections. Don't over complicate it. You don't want to give it all away at once.

Plot-19/20

The book is every girls dream. Honestly it's hard to put the book down. The constant battle between which guy she will choose and their individual romances is too intriguing. I think some things do come across a bit unrealistic but isn't that the purpose of a good romance novel? The plot is generally working well and you're going at a good pace. Keep up the good work.

Characters -18/20

Adriana

I LOVE Adriana's character. She is so sassy, yet so relatable because one has a clear understanding of her motivations. I think every girl wants to have the opportunity to get that kind of revenge. She is an inspiration.

Overall

I think in terms of Aspen, Isaac and Triston, you need to work on emphasising the variety between their characters so they have a very clear sense of individualism. Having so many males in the lead is risky and you need to have a clear unique factor to each one of them to avoid confusion.

Grammar and Spelling- 17/20

The grammar is good! There are a few mistakes, especially towards the beginning but it's nothing too distracting and it can be fixed when you revise and edit.

Writing Style- 4/5

Your writing is polished and compelling. My only critique is the way you show the time gaps. I think by simply stating with a heading that time has past, it breaks the illusion of the reality that you are creating. It's only distracting because it's happening so frequently. It is easy to fill in these gaps with a few paragraphs to show the shifts in time and space. I think it will flow more smoothly this way.

Originality -3/5

The story isn't completely original, a lot of the scenes are taken from other teen movies and books but it's still an additive read!

Overall Intrigue -9/10

The book is wildly compelling. It's quick paced and thrilling. Basically, once you start you can't really stop!