It's raining. Quite heavily at that too. It's pretty loud, being accompanied by thunder and all.

I think I'm dizzy...? I don't know. 

I'm tucked under my sheets, frame trembling from a post-nightmare. It sucks to be stuck here like this. 

I can't move. My limbs are joined together as if they're one bone yet at the same time, they feel like jelly. It's a nauseating experience. 

How long has it been? How long have I been like this? I have no idea. I'd like to get up and find out what time it is but I don't think I have the strength to even change my position.

I'm starting to get tired even though all I've done is lay here. ...Where am I laying again? Where am I? My house? I must be. Where else would I be? This isn't making any sense at all and my head is starting to hurt even more. Wait... when did my head start hurting...?

I feel some sort of cold pit in my stomach that makes me shiver every two minutes yet I can feel the sweat on my back and on my head making my bangs stick to my face.

They say listening to rain is calming. It's not. Whoever said this, lied.

Listening to the rain, to the raindrops hitting the surface of the road, my house, the window sill of my room mercilessly only reminds me of the gunshots that are fired at me every few heists, along with those cold and unforgiving eyes that boreholes in my back. I can always feel their glares filled through the brim with murderous intent. It feels similar to the cold pit in my stomach. I don't like that.

I take a deep, shuddering breath at that. When I stopped breathing, I don't know. 

The thunder reminds me of the... incident that happened all those years ago. The roller coaster, the screaming, the fire... NO, I am not remembering now. 

Too late. The panic and flashbacks have already stepped in. This only makes the trembling worse as my body shakes with restrained sobs. My vision is black, no my eyes are closed. Funny thing, I don't remember closing my eyes either. Well, it keeps the tears in so I guess that's a plus. 

Keeps the tears in, my a**! I can feel them flowing down my cheek, no matter how hard squeeze my eyes shut! The rain and thunder couldn't be any louder.

Actually... I take that back. The rain feels as if it's pounding down on my skull, the thunder is scaring the crap out of me by roaring like a fricking lion or something, and the cold is getting to me. I can hear every single raindrop as if it's echoing through my head yet it's the only thing keeping me attached to reality right now. 

I don't remember when the full-on silent, sorts of panicked, sobbing started or whether that was just in my head. I can't seem to make out the reason for this either anymore. Was it the flashbacks or just something that's been pent up unknowingly?

I don't know when someone came wherever I am. They must've called my name out but I wasn't able to hear anything over the buzz in my ear, fogginess clouding my senses and blatant panic setting its way into my mind. All I am focused on is the rainstorm that seems to be mocking my very existence and display of patheticness, taking shuddering breaths in and out almost painfully in a desperate manner. 

I feel feverish. How long has it been anyway?

But I do remember feeling whatever surface I was on shift as if an additional weight had been added and something that felt like strong yet gentle hands and arms pulled me close. I froze at first, despite the shivers wracking my body, at the unidentified touch. I try to pull away but I still can't move, can't feel anything, god I can't breathe- Slowly I notice the big lumpy mass holding me was warm. And oh, what a relief that was that I unconsciously leaned in to the body and literally nuzzled my stupid sobbing face in thinking that if I do that the tears will go unnoticed. 

Everything is still numb and I cant feel anything but a crushing wait on my chest and my desperate attempts to snag some oxygen definitely aren't helping. I hear someone shushing me through my muddled senses and immediately think that I'm not some child that needs to be shushed and comforted over a mere storm, a mere nightmare-

A loud thundering sound and I feel my whole body flinch violently which definitely doesn't help my shivering state. Whimpering, I think that maybe comfort doesn't sound all that bad right now. If I were more lucid I probably would've been embarrassed about my train of thought and what happens next. A hand comes up and starts running through my hair, patting my head and massaging my temples and scalp slowly in a pattern I recognise, shushing me and rocking back and forth. 

Breathing becomes just a bit easier and I gasp raspily,still trying to greedily get as much oxygen I can inhale. The hold of that horrible painful numbness slips a little and I realise that the person holding me is not unidentified, I know this person whoever it is. And this thought all but releases some mental tension in my mind.

I'm not sure when I stopped crying, when I became aware of my surroundings if I did, when I fell asleep (or not? I dont know if I was conscious or not), or how much time has passed. However one thing , I do know is that the unidentified person (not unidentified, familiar) is gone or at least not holding me anymore, and that everything still hurts but in a good way? More like, everything is not numb anymore but my body aches in the way that tells me I've really done a number on it and now the body shall take control over before I crash the ship. My face doesn't feel as sticky as I thought it would considering how much of a shitshow-slaash-impromptu crying session that had circumstances of a shitty teen romance movie where the girl gets dumped by her bf. But it's still sticky with sweat and my bangs have been moved out of the way and there's something on my forehead that I'm pretty sure used to be cool but it's become warm from the heat from my forehead. Did I mention my forehead feels like it's on fire?

"Urgh", groaning I put my hand on my head to confirm that indeed, there is a used-to-be cold cooling pack on it. Shivers rack my frame as I pull the blanket tighter around and me and finally open my eyes to blink blearily at the surroundings. It's mostly dark except for a small lamp on my desk which I keep there for extra light during studying (or making Kid's tools). I glance towards the window and see my pile of laundry unceremoniously dumped to the ground from the chair beside it by... Wait a second what is Nakamori Keibu doing here?? Why is he sleeping in that god awful chair?? No better question, why is he in my room again?? Doesn't he live in, oh I don't know, the house next door? Like, pointedly, not. my. house??? Why is that even a question-

...
'Oh.' and as if to congratulate my foggy brain for finally connecting the dots a great thought enters my mind. Truly the wisdom of ancestors-

I'm so dumb.

Of course he's the one who put the cooling pad on my head. He must've been checking in on me like he does every time there's a bad storm and I'm not sleeping over at his place. I wonder why it took me so long to realise that it was him who comforted me after the nightmare, like he always does. I suppose it's because, in my mind, I've made myself slowly more distant to them due to which I didn't head over there myself once I heard about the storm coming. It used to be a regular thing even though it got a bit awkward as Aoko and I grew up. I've been feeling so guilty about always taking up the inspector's time with his daughter. I know Aoko certainly hates it. I don't mean to but it happens.

I clench my fist as a wave of nausea rolls over. 'Chill out Kaito, breathe in breathe out. Stay in the here and now.' Holy shit it works! Wow guess watching that how to calm down for dumb people video wasn't a waste of time after all!

Opening my eyes again (when did I close them?) I look at Nakamori Keibu sitting there, 'Man, that cannot be good for his back', I decide to focus on his breathing, you know, like a normal person.

I don't know when I fell asleep again but I do know that that night, I felt safe after a long, long time.