Billy really wished right about now that he wasn't stuck in the body of an adult. Ugh, stuck with the old responsible dudes. Not cool.

He was supposed to be rocking that sk8terboy aesthetic (don't judge, everyone misses the 2000s a little), not looking like a man with a university degree and more mortgages than back problems.

The unfortunate thing about secret identities it that they have to be kept secret.

Billy couldn't be part of the Teen Titans because that would just be weird, and his humour went unappreciated by the Justice League. Awkward here, awkward there. Just wonderful.

He stared at the three of them talking- Robin, Raven and Superboy. Occasionally one of them would laugh, or roll their eyes, or punch someone's shoulder (though that could have gone quite nastily when Superboy nudged Robin's arm and he threatened to drag Superboy's soul to hell). Billy sighed, they were literally his age; he was left standing by Nightwing and Superman, supervising.

Did they even know he wasn't, like, thirty? Billy reckoned Robin- Damian- did. Only because Batman did. Robin knew everything Batman knew because Robin was mildly creepy that way. Even more so with the- you know- god of death in his head.

And there was something a little off in the way Superboy (Calvin-no, Conner, that was it) looked at Raven and Robin. Billy tilted his head in scrutiny. Oh yeah, the dude definitely had it bad. But which one? To weight up the pros of each: genuinely purple hair...badass jawline (-oof damn); fricking purple eyes (honestly gorgeous, Billy felt the heat rising to his cheeks)...a katana..a literal katana; and that spooky aura- no they had that in common.

Flashing to mind came the image of Superman, completing a sudoko, sipping a mug of tea and whispering, "Robin and Raven are apparently in a relationship now."

That was a hot piece of information.

Billy snickered to himself imagining what might be running through Superboy's head (earning an unamused eyeroll from Hawkgirl- who assumed that he was up to some shenanigans again). He made a little Conner-voice in his head, "So are you two, like, a package deal or...?". And snorted.

Nightwing nudged him, whispering (which didn't make sense considering Conner had super-hearing), "You know you could try and talk to them rather than just staring."

From his other side, Superman leaned in, voice just as low, "That would look less weird."

Billy raised his eyebrows and shrugged, gesturing to the six-feet three-inch powerhouse of a body he currently inhabited.

Dick placed his elbow on Billy's shoulder- rather, tried to, for he was a little too much on the short side.

"Come on, they know you're not actually that old. " He encouraged.

Tapping her mace on the ground, Hawkgirl added with a snort, "And if they didn't, they're certainly about to find out." The Thanagarian looked ahead to the swarm of flashes, microphones and sheer journalistic desperation. Batman quietened the cacophony with a sharp glare (the classic Batglare TM) before allowing the recently briefed Cyborg to deliver a statement to the press.

Kendra directed her attention towards the metahuman and Lantern half-ass-ing their way through an explanation of the prior events (the whole 'gods fighting each other and possessing humans' situation) to the local police in secondary school Spanish that would make the Duolingo bird physically and mentally break.

Exasperated, Batman quickly saw his way to smooth their unintentional faux-pas in perfect Spanish: Hal wiped a sweat from his brow, having mastered only corny one-liners.

WonderWoman naturally did not face the same problems as Barry and Hal- though the forces she addressed found her speech somewhat archaic, rather alike hearing a person use the words 'thou', 'forsooth', 'shalt' in English. The general at the forefront of his troops nodded his acceptance of her thanks for the assistance, pursuing further dialogue.

Kendra pinched the bridge of her nose, "Fuck it, I'm waiting inside the jet. I'm way too drained to be standing here forever and a day. Too drained to fly anywhere long distance too." She tossed a peace-sign at the lot behind her, shouting, "Have fun doing nothing!" And marched around the corner.

Billy rolled back his shoulders and clicked his neck. Right. He did human interaction all the time. Piece of cake. Giving his encouragers one last dubious look, Billy floated over a proven chunk of lamppost towards them.

Robin acknowledged his arrival with a stiffly raised eyebrow (unmoving and disconcerting). Perhaps he detected a hint of something other than stone dead- nope, Raven was exactly the same.
Superboy's eyes seemed to do that same overly-wide-then-drastically-soften expression of relief. Billy noticed Conner hover a little closer to him.

Realising that he's cut off their conversation, Billy started, "So Anubis huh?" He aimed the question at Robin (who was absently caressing the pommel of that-uncomfortably- sharp katana).

Damian stared unblinking.

"Yes. Anubis. You seem to have understood the basic concept of names. Do you want a sticker?" He droned.

Raven rolled her eyes, amending in the same tone, "Ignore him. He's emotionally stunted."

His eyes turned to slits as he seethed, "No I'm not."

"Hah, yes you are."

"No." Conner thought he could see smoke streaming from Damian's nose. "I'm. Not."

Features bathed in smugness, the witch folded her arms and goaded, "Fine. Go tell Dick that you love him." For Damian certainly did care a great deal for his brother.

Narrowing his eyes one last time, Damian pursed his lips, thinking of angle to fight it from. She would've just kept on bringing more examples- there were many.

"TT. Stop being right. I hate you."

Raven looked at him from the corner of her eye, the corner of her lips quirking upwards, "Now you know that's not true."

A half-hearted, "Oh shut up." Was all Damian could manage: finding himself forcibly keeping his hand from brushing back the fringe that had fallen in to her eyes. An untraceable compulsion that he wondered if she could detect.

Billy felt very, very single.

But more importantly, he felt obliged to say what Victor was not there to say, "Y'all are so cute it's almost gross." Okay perhaps he wouldn't have added that bit.

Whilst Conner tasted the word 'y'all', Robin and Raven did seem quite prepared to dash a motherfucker through the nearest shop window- a quaint little place selling wedding dresses-; Billy didn't want to be ruining anyone's big day.

"It's a good thing though, like, you two, I mean, you look good- not good- like, you didn't look bad before just...you seem like a good match." Billy fumbled

A few seconds behind, bless him, Conner asked, "Hey you're not from anywhere in the south are you? Wait..." his eyes were like CDs as he looked at Damian and Raven. "..."a match" like, a pair, like together, like..." he pointed at Damian. "he's your boyfriend." He directed the finger at Raven. "And she's your girlfriend. Sort of thing?" Conner's decorative circular shades (mega cool vibes) very nearly feel off: it tells a lot about a boy that he would remember his unnecessary specs but not his boots.

"None of your busine-"

"Yes we are." Raven finished,arm resting on Damian's shoulder (which unlike Dick, she could actually do).

Billy thought Superboy might've been about to have one of those sudden fatal medical contions (for all the Wisdom of Solomon, he couldn't remember what it was called: a hernia?; hepatitis B?; oh well, something like that).

He fiddled with the bottom of his jacket, "Wait so you, like...wha? Since when? Not all the way back at the Tower though?"

Raven shook her head whilst Damian murmured about having taken people's heads off for less.

Struggling to process, heat brightening his cheeks (which his turned-up collar couldn't hide) Conner held his fingers to his temples, trying some very strong brain-thinking. Shit. Raven was some sort of empath thingy. He'd been walking around harbouring some very conflicting, confusing, perhaps a tad non-PG thoughts/feelings...about someone who could sense thoughts/feelings...and her boyfriend.

Oooh how he wanted the Earth to swallow him whole.

Hearing his not-exactly-son's hammering heartbeat, Superman approached the group. Dick followed, not interested in standing on his own like an idiot for all the press to see: 'Daily News Headlines: Nightwing's catasstrophic rejection- Bludhaven's loner?

Nightwing tapped his permanent coms link to the Batcave, "Al, can I get a time check."

The faint salmon tinge to the sky hadn't been promising, but Alfred's response was even more disheartening. Dick would make sure that Batman pushed the idea of never ever ever again travel back from a fight all together. Too much waiting. He was ravenous.

Speaking of...

With Billy and Conner having assured good ol' Uncle Clark that nothing was wrong, the witch tutted, Damian-like, glancing at the visible heroes dealing with the press and Mexican forces.

"How long are they going to be? Some of us do have stomachs to feed."

There was a great murmur of agreement.

Billy was the first to make the suggestion that everyone was waiting for, "So...are we gonna go eat or...?"

Considering J'onn and John (very confusing if read aloud) were elsewhere interrogating the formerly possessed human in liaison with the authorities, and that would take a while, there didn't appear to be any harm in a sneaky burrito.

Ears picking up footsteps, Clark spun, hopeful for it to be either of the interrogators. No such luck.

Which bastard should come sauntering through a particularly grimy alleyway, unidentifiable wrap making its way towards his open, expectant mouth, but Jason Peter Todd. Noticing their eyes one by one dragging to his burrito, The Red Hood waved it teasingly at them (some of the insides spilling to the outside).

"Holy shit you lot are slow."

A.N:

GAH such a shit chapter but anywayyyyy. How are you lot coping my darlings? Life is just...ughhhh isn't it?
There's probably some shit I wanted to say here but I've forgotten :/ great. Well done Bats, you're such a genius.

Well anywayyyy thank you my darlings for dealing with me and my shenanigans. I love you all.

-Bats