Copywrite to Veda Pettigrew

My breath hitched.

Alpha Alpha.

What was it about him that made Silver floop inside me? Yes floop. It's the only word suitable for the feeling. The dropping, rushing sensation your stomach experiences when you plunge from a height. Exciting, dangerous, thrilling.

Fiona looked far away into the trees, remembering. "I saw him when I was at the last two big challenges. I watched him win his title five years ago." She raised her eyebrows with a grin, "It was the sexiest thing I've ever seen. He utterly destroyed every single wolf."

"Who did he beat to take the title? His father?" I asked breathlessly, my stomach fizzing.

"No, the old Alpha Alpha was childless, the title was open to anyone who could take it. It always is really, but normally it does go down father to son."

"Was he in the alpha pack?" Silver was leaning against my thigh, staring up at Fiona and absorbing everything she said about the leader of all wolves. Her heartbeat was strong and fast, like mine. She whined softly and I stroked her absentmindedly. "I don't even know its name."

"It's the Black Lake Mountain Pack and, yes he was already a part of it. He was just a regular warrior though, his father is actually a doctor." That was unusual, with his strength he should have come from a line of warrior wolves.

"How do you know?" I felt an uncomfortable pulling in my gut. Curiously, I didn't like the way she was admiring this man that I'd never met.

Her mouth dropped, "His story is legendary, everyone knows. You know he's only 29? He won the title at 24. Twenty FOUR! The previous Alpha Alpha was still only sixty when he got dethroned," her hands were flying around as she spoke. My eyes widened in shock.

"That's unbelievable," I breathed.

She nodded, "He's the youngest ever Alpha Alpha, and according to Marcus, there's never been such a strong one. He should know, they have to study Alpha Alpha's of the past as part of their training. Also, not one of his fights lasted more than five minutes, which was unheard of. By the time you get to the higher levels, the competitors are all really strong and fights can last hours."

I gasped.

"Not normally, but it's been known. For the most part, they last between fifteen and thirty minutes."

"That sounds brutal."

She grinned, "It is. Don't tell Marcus, but I love it. I mean, half-naked wrestling men, bloody knuckles and vicious strength." She fanned herself quickly, "Pheweee."

I laughed. "I'm not sure I'll love it as much as you Fiona."

"I bet you will. It's primal," she gave me a lop-sided grin, wiggling her eyebrows. I laughed at her antics. "But even in the first tournament, he was the hot topic. He came from nowhere and annihilated everyone except the Alpha Alpha of the time. Everyone knew he was getting that title at the next tournament."

"So where's the old Alpha Alpha now? It must have been pretty humiliating for him," I puckered my brow.

"I think he was actually pleased to be dethroned by a legend. I mean, it's much more of a story than just handing it down to your son. But anyway he's part of the council now, all Alpha Alpha's join."

I nodded, it made sense. We started heading towards the cabin again.

"Their official titles switch to 'The Honourable Councilman Alpha Praeteritum'" she rolled her eyes, "But everyone just calls them H-CAPs. The old Alpha Alpha is the First H-CAP, the others get shoved down the line. So the First becomes Second, Second becomes Third, and so on ... you get the picture."

"How many H-CAPs are there?"

"Five altogether, though Fifth H-CAP is reaaally old, I think he's like nearly 180."

"Whoa, is he the oldest wolf alive?" Most wolves live to one and a half centuries, maybe a little longer. I brushed my hands through the damp leaves above our heads, releasing their scent.

"I think so. They generally live longer than us regular wolves, being so much stronger than us. Even when they change back from Lycan..."

"Lycan? What do you mean?" I stopped and waited for her to turn back to me.

She turned and stood up on a fallen log, "When the werewolf wins the title Alpha Alpha, they change. It's kind of a mystery, they go to bed werewolf and wake up Lycan. And they never talk about it."

I shook my head, confused, "What is a Lycan?"

She grinned, "They're exceedingly strong, way more so than regular werewolves. That's why the Alpha Alpha title goes down family lines. I think they almost have to choose to give the title away, otherwise they're unbeatable." She smiled dreamily, "It's partly what makes Alpha Alpha Griffin so legendary."

My heart bounced involuntarily, excited to hear his name. Griffin. It was ridiculous that even just hearing his name made Silver howl happily.

Fiona carried on, fortunately oblivious to my crazy reaction. "First H-CAP was not ready to give up his title. It was well known that he said he would only consider it when he reached seventy. But Alpha Alpha Griffin just took it, with barely any difficulty."

Her voice was filled with admiration, making Silver stop howling and give a little growl instead. "Don't worry, she wouldn't be unfaithful to Marcus. I think theirs is as close to a love-match as pack mates get."

Silver huffed, unconvinced. I ran my fingers through her fur, "Come on, we like Fiona. And we don't even know Alpha Alpha Griffin," her skin rippled at hearing his name. "We can't judge her for fancying the man considered a legend. I mean, I had a crush on Tom Lamos just because he was our school sporting hero."

She shook her fur out and rumbled crossly, she didn't like that I had secret stalker photos of him all over our bedroom wall when I was a teenager. She thought we should only have eyes for our mate.

My theory was that I was only appreciating the fine gifts that Ori gave us!

It wasn't like he ever noticed me, he was too busy making out with the human girls, the only ones who would do anything more than kiss. He was human, but a mighty fine one.

I shook my head to clear the memories and replied to Fiona, "That's impressive."

"Very," she sighed longingly and I found Silver's favourite tickly spot behind her ear to distract her. "They also have heightened senses; better hearing, sight, smell. I don't know about the previous ones, but Alpha Alpha Griffin can read minds."

I grimaced at that, "So he can just dip in and out unannounced and spy on you."

She laughed, "No, it doesn't quite work like that. I saw him do it and it looked quite painful. Although the person he was doing it to was a strong Alpha who was trying to resist him, maybe it wouldn't hurt if you were okay with it," she shrugged.

"Why was he reading his mind?" And who in their right mind would be okay with having their privacy invaded?

"The Alpha, now ex Alpha Templeton of Brookwood Pack, had been heard boasting about keeping rogues in a secret underground bunker and experimenting on them..."

The very thought made me sick. Technically my family and I were rogues as we wouldn't join a bigger pack. Just because we considered ourselves to be a pack of three, doesn't mean anyone else agreed.

"... Alpha Alpha Griffin was livid and demanded Templeton stop it and reveal where the bunker was. Templeton refused to tell him, so Alpha Alpha went in his mind and took the knowledge by force. I mean, there's lots of ways he could have done it, his alpha command is unbeatable, whether you submit to him or not. Even rogues have to obey it. I think he did it that way because he wanted it to hurt, he looked furious when he heard about the experiments."

My heart did another little skip. A powerful wolf working to help the weaker ones, now that was something I could get behind.

"Do you know what happened to the rogues?"

She shook her head, "No, it was the day we were leaving to come back to Stone Mountain. I was just glad I got to see it though, it was really something."

It made me shiver uncomfortably. Someone with that much power was someone to fear. I needed to know more, "What else about Lycans?"

"Well, Marcus said they have two forms," she grabbed a nearby stick and started breaking it up, brow furrowed. "The usual wolf, though it becomes colossal in size. And a cross between human and wolf, standing on two legs and everything. Apparently it's a fearsome sight because they almost double in size."

I started bouncing on my heels nervously, he was definitely beginning to sound more scary than sexy, no matter what Fiona thought. And he was coming here. Silver nudged me to remember his actions in protecting the rogues, he wasn't bad. At least not all of him.

"They're invincible in that form," she continued. "Their hide becomes impenetrable, their nails are talons as long as your finger, super sharp. Lethal. I know there are more details, but most of it is secret. Like, you can only know if you're super upper-echelon! I bet there's even stuff nobody except the Alpha Alpha knows."

Fiona was breathless just talking about him, practically sparkling all over with a faraway look in her eye. I was fast rubbing Silver into a tickly-spot coma so she would stop growling at her. Crazy wolf.

It may have also helped distract my growing irritation.

"But even in skin form, he is the biggest male I have ever seen. His muscles are triple the size of Alpha Anderson... no, quadruple or even... what's eight times bigger?" she cocked her head.

"Octuple I think?"

"Okay, so his muscles are octuple the size of Alpha's." She opened her hands wide, indicating their size. She was definitely spouting some serious hyperbole and I laughed as we took to the path again.

"He has these grey and black tattoos all over his back. They show off his rippling..."

"Ok, seriously. Stop drooling you perve," I giggled through my annoyance. I did not want to hear her salivating over his body.

She smirked, "You'll see. He'll be here soon, just like, three...?" I shrugged, unsure. "...weeks now."

I saw the cabin in the distance and all my friends were already waiting outside. We had obviously got quite distracted on the way.

"What does Marcus think of your fan-girling?" I selfishly wanted to remind her that she was mated and Alpha Alpha Griffin was out of bounds.

Her eyes widened in shock, "He doesn't know. I have no idea how I managed to hide it so far, but please, for the love of everything good in this world, don't tell him," she begged.

I waved her hand off with an evil twinkle in my eye, "Hhhmm, well let's see what's it worth?"

Her face dropped and she actually got down on her knees, clasping her hands together. "Please Greta, he'll be so hurt." She went white and I felt terrible. Well, terrible for hurting her, but ecstatic that she had real feelings for her mate.

"Fiona, I was only teasing. I would never divulge a secret you confided in me," I grabbed her hands and pulled her up into my arms. "I'm sorry, I thought you'd realise."

"It's just that Marcus is a good mate, but super jealous. He hates the thought of another male near me. Could you imagine what he'd do if he found out about my secret crush," her voice shook. "And I really do think he's handsome."

"I can tell you mean a lot to each other," I said sincerely.

"I would never act on it," she said adamantly. "For starters, I'm not likely to tempt the most powerful wolf in existence, but mainly because I wouldn't want to hurt Marcus, I care deeply for him." Her voice rang in honesty.

I smiled, "I know. Come on, let's forget this and go for a run."

We greeted our friends and went into the privacy cubicles to undress. As soon as I folded the last item into my locker I felt the familiar, welcome tingle of Silver surging her body into mine. She practically made me sick with giddiness as she ran in circles, excited to come out and run with her new pack. 

The skin on my arms rippled as my muscles clenched and released, reshaping into her form. Then I felt it on my back and legs too, it created pleasant electrical sparks, shooting inward. Fur tickled my skin as it grew. My bones cracked as they found their new form, much like the popping of a joint, all I felt was release.

Waves of power rolled over and through me, making the process easier. The first change had been pure pain, but once I met Silver properly and we learnt to work together, it was quite enjoyable. I heard some painful groans and realised this was not the case for all my friends.

I would help train Lacy and Sophie, just like my parents taught me. It would get better.

I let Silver have control and she pushed through the curtain to the outside, immediately inhaling the forest scent. Our favourite thing. She trotted forward and sat on a little hillock, putting her nose into the wind.

Her eyes were closed but we still heard Kat sneaking up to us. She sat still until Kat was really close, then suddenly turned and leapt onto her, rolling with her to the ground. Once Kat was on her back, belly up, Silver jumped up and sauntered away, looking over her shoulder with a wolfy grin.

Kat's grey wolf barked feistily and trotted behind us. One by one, all the other wolves joined us prancing around in a fake battle.

"Lacy, Sophie, try stepping back and letting Autumn and Deseado come forward. They will take control and you can sit back and enjoy the ride."

I saw their brows furrow and barked with laughter. "You look constipated. Just relax, it's not hard. Feel yourself standing next to your wolf..."

"Hmmm," they agreed.

"Now, just stay where you are and allow them to go forward. They know what to do."

I could see when they got it. Their stances changed subtly. I'd never realised before now, wolves held their bodies differently, relaxing into a more natural form. As shifters, we try and hold to our human ideas of how a wolf should be, but now Autumn and Deseado looked more comfortable in their fur.

"Wow, this feels weird," Lacy said.

"Yeah," Sophie agreed.

"You have to get used to not being in charge, trust your wolf to lead you. They are part of you, but also Ori, they want only good things for you."

"I do trust Deseado," Sophie said immediately and Lacy hummed happily.

I looked around and saw the others watching us expectantly. "Come on, let's go. Just sit back and watch. It's amazing to experience."

Silver started running, howling a call to the others to follow. Deseado and Autumn howled too, making the others join in.

I felt so free. We spent hours chasing, exploring and playing. We went further than with Alpha; Silver and I wanted to know all of this amazing land. Our paws thudding on the soft forest floor matched our heartbeat, we felt lighter with each gust of mountain-fresh wind ruffling through our fur.

It was heavenly.

Silver's excitement spiked as she saw some fallen trunks. We leapt over them, soaring high and leaving me breathless. She was a strong and graceful wolf, amazing to behold. I was in awe of her.

We loved that our friends' paws beat a rhythmic tattoo behind us, giving us a sense of belonging again. Silver heard water ahead, and with a sense of impishness, bounced onto a log and launched over a large stream, splashing the water's edge as we landed. Hearing much larger splashes and yelps of surprise behind us, I giggled. Mischievous girl.

"Ewww Silver," Lacy complained, "We're all wet now."

"It's not like you're going to melt," I laughed. "You're a wolf."

"Doesn't mean I like it, it's not exactly warm."

"Just attune yourself to how Autumn is feeling, she doesn't mind the cold."

"Fine, but that's just us and Deseado, look at the others," Lacy demanded.

I stopped and looked before dropping to the ground and rolling with laughter. The five wolves were lifting their paws as they ran, their faces dripping with disgust. They frantically shook their feet as they went, making them do this weird hoppy, flippy run.

They watched me with surprise as I was rolling about. It was an over-reaction I know, but they looked like housecats instead of wild wolves. I was so caught up in my mirth I didn't notice as the five crept up on me and attacked with war yowls.

We felt gentle bites on our legs, not designed to hurt, and paws trying to stomp at our wagging tail, but didn't get up. We felt safe, even in this prone position. Instead, Silver noticed that we were lying on a particularly nice patch of bracken and wriggled around, scratching her back.

I heard some annoyed woofs and giggled. They obviously didn't like Silver's casual attitude towards their attempt to tell her off. Silver didn't take any notice, instead she just wriggled around a bit more.

Eventually they flopped beside us and joined in.

"That was amazing. I've never felt so unrestricted and fluid while running," Sophie breathed happily.

"It really was," Lacy agreed, panting.

We lay on our backs and watched the trees above, none of us wanting to leave our blissful idyll. Enjoying the silence, I let my mind wander to our reaction to hearing about Alpha Alpha Griffin. I knew there was a reason for my feelings. I even knew what it was, I wasn't stupid.

But I didn't want to look too closely at it.

The thought that he might be... was both incredible and alarming. If it was so, I would never be free again. Terror gripped me at the thought. The only thing that kept me going since I arrived, was that we would be able to escape with a mate.

If that said mate was the worldwide leader of all wolves, that would never happen.

I gulped at the unwelcome surge of adrenaline. Silver growled at me, cross that I would be so negative about a miraculous gift from Ori, but I couldn't help it. I would not automatically love him; though there would be an undeniable connection that mainly came through our wolves, I would have to learn to love his human half over time.

But how could I love someone who led the laws I so passionately hated. Would he treat me the way Alpha treated Luna? How could I live with that? I knew that if he was my true mate, Ori would have designed us for each other, but what if he didn't have a real wolf? Then he wouldn't know, or care.

Another thought gripped me as panic surged through Silver's body. What if he was already mated? We rolled to our stomach as Silver started hyperventilating. I pulled myself together, and hugged her to me.

"I'm sure he isn't my love. Fiona would have mentioned it." I stroked her, but she whined in pain. I felt bad for letting the thought cross my mind and crushed her to my heart. "Ori wouldn't let him mate with someone, she wouldn't."

I'm not sure I entirely liked arguing on this side, I still wanted to have a strop and run away. But Silver needed me. And she would need him if he was our mate. I wouldn't run away for her sake. Unless he didn't recognise us.

Silver whined again and suddenly seven wet noses pressed into our fur, snouts rubbing their comfort. They didn't know why, but they knew we were unhappy and they didn't like it. "Baby, we don't even know if he is our mate. These feelings might be something else entirely. Maybe the dodgy-podge?"

She snorted at me.

I sighed, "Ask Ori, go on. I'll wait here for you."

She jumped up and dashed away so fast I felt her pop in my chest. I stood and shook my fur out, the others looked at me curiously but I ignored them and started trotting back to the pack house. As much as I wanted to stay out here, it was getting late and I didn't want to upset Alpha. He might change his mind.

"What's going on?" Sophie asked.

"Where did Silver go?" Lacy added.

"She needed to go and ask Ori something." I didn't know what to tell them, I wanted to keep my suspicions to myself. There was no need upsetting them with the thought that I might be leaving.

As the thought crossed my mind I stumbled. I didn't want to leave my friends behind, it would be so painful. I reasoned that it was always going to happen when I ran away with my mate. But I could have asked him to take them too, now we would be separated.

"Seriously Grets, what's going on?" Lacy sounded anxious.

"Sorry guys, it's just... I guess I'm worried about my future," I wouldn't tell them until it happened, hopefully by then they would have more acceptance from the other women of the pack. They'd be happier.

"What? Why? Where did that come from?" Sophie asked.

"I don't know, just letting my thoughts wander and started randomly panicking."

"Well don't worry, we will be by your side whatever happens."

"Friends and pack for life."

I nearly cried. Instead, I pushed my body to run harder, punishing myself to help with the pain inside. I didn't want to leave them, they were my family.

This was ridiculous. Alpha Alpha Griffin might not even be my mate. I had to get a hold of myself.

I felt Silver return and let her have the lead, assessing her mood. She was happy, whatever Ori told her, it was good news.

"I take it our mate is single?"

She howled in delight.

"Is Alpha Alpha Griffin our mate?"

She ignored me. I guess Ori didn't want me to know yet. Maybe that meant he wasn't mine and she wanted me to keep an open mind. I let the thought cheer me, purposefully pushing the reality far away.

I was the queen of emus.