if we were a movie
💭
"Want to come to my house after school today? Dad hasn't seen you in a while, I thought we could all go out to dinner together or someth-" Ricky began.
"Rick! Look!" Y/N whirled around to show Ricky the single rose she found in her locker. He grimaced and nodded his head, faking a smile.
I would've bought you a whole bouquet, not just a single pathetic rose.
"Y-Yeah. That's so nice of him, Y/N." She brought the flower up to your nose and closed her eyes, inhaling it's light scent. She exhaled happily and placed it back in her locker with a prominent smile gracing her soft, plump lips.
"Anyways Y/N, do you think you could come over-" Ricky was once again interrupted, this time by Y/N's boyfriend. Ricky watched as he picked Y/N up by her waist and spun her around in the middle of the hallway. Y/N let out a surprised squeal and completely forget about Ricky's presence.
Of course.
Whenever Y/N was in a new relationship, Ricky felt lonely and forgotten. He and Big Red were always the third and fourth wheels. To make things worse, none of her boyfriends ever liked Ricky. They despised him.
"Morning, babe." Ethan smiled as he set her down. Ricky cringed. "Good morning." She spoke softly, reaching her hand up to run through his hair.
"I hope you liked the little gift I got you." Ethan leaned down to place a passionate kiss onto Y/N's lips. Aware of nearly the entire hallway with their eyes on her, Y/N pulled away from the kiss quite quickly. "People are watching."
Ethan glanced up, making eye contact with different students as he looked around, including Ricky, who was looking at the couple like a lost puppy.
"Dicky, stop being such a perv. Can't you see I'm trying to kiss my girlfriend? Get a life." Ethan snarled, narrowing his eyes and sizing up the shorter boy. Ricky quickly glanced down at his shoes and fidgeted with his hands.
"Hey, hey, don't talk to him like that." Y/N scolded, "And his name is Ricky." Ricky looked up to her with hopeful eyes.
"I know that, love. I'm just messing around with him. Right, Rick?" Ethan sent Ricky a death glare and nudged his shoulder harshly.
"Uh, y-yeah. Just playing around." Ricky scratched the back of his neck and chuckled to cover up the evident cracks in his high pitched voice.
Not just playing around. Ricky hated Ethan. Ricky hated all of Y/N's boyfriends, to be honest. He hated all of them because they were all tall, handsome, and popular. Oh, and because they weren't him.
He hated that they all dated her because she was hot. To Ricky, that was the least interesting thing about Y/N.
She was so much more than that. Brilliant, funny, charismatic and passionate, she was so clever, thoughtful, considerate, kind, welcoming, and much, much more. Ricky could go on and on about what he loved about Y/N. Most of her old boyfriends barely even noticed these traits.
Ricky knew he had no chance with Y/N, and yet, he still loved her. He loved her more and more as the days passed. He would often imagine a world where they were finally together, in a relationship and happy. Almost like a movie.
Every time Ricky imagined this 'movie', it would always play out the same. He'd be the perfect guy. She'd realise Ricky was the only boy who was right for her. She'd discover that this entire time, it was him that she was in love with. In the end, they would finally end up together, living happily without a single worry.
The movie would fade to black on a long shot of you and Ricky resting in each other arms, watching the sun set on a warm, lonely beach like they were the only two people in the world. Unfortunately for Ricky, that would only occur in his imagination.
It would never happen in real life.
Y/N furrowed her eyebrows, but nodded and glanced back up at Ethan. "Let me take you to class, yeah?" He questioned and Y/N smiled showing her pearly whites and allowed Ethan to take her hand and lead her to her first class of the day.
Ricky watched as she walked farther and farther away from him until he couldn't see her anymore. Y/N had left him in the dust, not even bothering to turn around to utter a goodbye.
"Ricky! Guess what?" Y/N squealed over the phone. She had just arrived back home from Ethan's football game, which he won, obviously. "What's up, Y/N." Ricky replied, negativity evident in his tone.
Y/N began to share what seemed like every burning detail of her night. From the moment when Ethan arrived on the field, to when he scooped her up in his arms and kissed her in front of the whole crowd after scoring the winning touchdown.
While she spoke, tears formed on Ricky's waterline. He slumped his shoulders and his body sunk further and further into his mattress as he attempted to drown out the sound of her lovely voice.
Her voice was beautiful. Hearing her voice was more appealing to Ricky than listening to his favourite band. Y/N's voice was warm and soft, like his favourite blanket. It was bright and delicate, yet stern, assertive, and powerful when it needed to be.
Ricky shut his eyes as he tried to stop the tears, only causing them to run down his blotchy face. "You okay, Rick?" He heard her ask, furrowing her eyebrows and running a frustrated hand through her y/h/l hair. It always hurt her when Ricky held back or kept something from her.
"I'm fine, Y/N/N. I promise. Sounds like you had fun tonight. I gotta go, uh, my dad's calling. Night." He insisted before abruptly hanging up. He threw his phone elsewhere and flopped over, dumping his face into his pillow.
You could tell that there was something wrong by Ricky's lack of input throughout your whole rant. Usually, Ricky would add in a couple sarcastic comments or simply speak to let you know he was listening, but today he was completely silent. It was almost if he had put himself on mute (he didn't).
Ricky was tired of having to put on a fake smile and pretend like he was supportive of her relationships. Like he wasn't madly in love with her.
The soft material of his pillow covers soaked up his tears and blocked his vision and hearing. Yet, when he closed his eyes, all he could imagine was her. As time passed, his sobs and sniffles faded and he found himself dreaming about the world he fabricated in his mind so many years ago.
"Y/N/N, I'm home!" Ricky shouted into their home, placing his skateboard next to the door and kicking his shoes off.
"Ricky!" Y/N cheered, running from the living room towards the entrance. She jumped into his open arms and wrapped her legs around his waist, squealing as he spun her around.
"How was your day, bubs?" Y/N inquired curiously once he set her back down on her feet. Ricky ran a hand through his styled curls. "Absolute shit. But better now that you're with me."
His kind words made Y/N's face flush. "Come on, Friends is on TV." She changed the subject with a blush on her face, grabbing his hand.
Ricky pulled her back into his arms gently. "Aren't you forgetting something?"
And with that, Y/N let out the most beautiful laugh and cupped his cheek before leaning forward to kiss her soulmate, sweet and soft with the taste of her intoxicating cherry chapstick on her lips.
The next morning, Y/N approached Ricky's only other best friend at East High, Big Red. She wasn't very close with Big Red, but he was her last resort at this point.
"Redhead!" She shouted as she pushed past students who inconveniently stood talking to each other in the middle of the hallway, right in front of Red's locker.
"Oh hey, Y/N! Haven't seen you in a while, what's up?" Big Red questioned, slamming his locker shut, providing her with his full attention.
"It's Ricky. These last few weeks he's been more.. distant. I know he isn't okay, he isn't acting like himself. I'm guessing he's told you what's wrong with him, because for some reason, he hasn't told me anything." His eyes widened for a split second.
"I don't think it's my place to tell you what's going on Y/N. I think he'll tell you when he's ready."
"Well, when will that be?" She asked impatiently.
Y/N didn't mean to come off as rude or impolite, but knowing her best friend, Ricky was a very indecisive person.
"You know I don't know that." He consoled, placing his hand on her shoulder comfortingly. They both knew that due to the ongoing situation between Ricky's parents, he had trouble expressing his emotions to people.
"I'm sorry, Y/N, but I think you're just going to have to wait until he comes to you first." Y/N nodded repeatedly, partially ignoring the boy in front of her as she intently observed her best friend make his way to his class, maneuvering himself around the crowds of cliques.
"Thank you."
During english, one of the only classes Y/N had with Ricky, she decided to invite him to hang out. Y/N hadn't hung out with him in a while, and if he came over, perhaps he would eventually tell her what was wrong with him.
She wrote him a note on a pink sticky note, crumpled it up and threw it at him when the teacher had his back turned to the class. Luckily, the light piece of paper made it to Ricky's spot, a couple desks in front of her.
He turned back and saw her smiling at him with bright eyes, and he made sure to turn back before his cheeks turned pink.
my place at 4? if you're not busy, of course <3
Ricky grinned widely and quickly wrote a response, before tossing the paper behind him.
He turned around to watch her reaction to his response, but was called out by the teacher. "Mr. Bowen, is staring at Ms. L/N more important than my class?" Students all around him snickered and stared at him as he turned red and began to stutter.
Yes.
"Uh, no. Sorry." He answered. The teacher nodded and turned back to the board along with the rest of the class who continued to write down formulas in their notebooks except for Ethan, who was sitting at a desk across the room from Y/N and Ricky, who stayed giving Ricky the death glare.
When Ricky met his glance, Ricky stood his ground and mirrored his facial expression. Ethan shook his head and mouthed 'you're dead' before turning back to sit up straight in his seat.
Ricky rolled his eyes and looked back at the board, impatiently waiting for this class to be over so he could finally spend some alone time with his best friend.
"Stop staring at me like that." Ricky grumbled. "And would you stop shining that stupid light in my face?" Ricky squinted and desperately tried covering his eyes with his hands while Y/N shined her 'Pixar-inspired' desk lamp in his face.
"This is an intervention!" She cheered, or yelled, what's the difference? Y/N had given up on being patient with Ricky. He'd already been at your house for three hours. No luck.
"What for?" Ricky tilted his head, confusion written all over his face. "I'm going to get straight to the point. You've been acting off lately, Rick. What's wrong?"
Ricky scoffed. "Nothing's wrong."
"Then why have you been so weird!?" Y/N inquired. "You told Big Red about it, why can't you tell me?"
Ricky could see in her eyes that she wasn't joking anymore. There was a twinge of anger, and maybe sadness in her y/e/c irises, yet he chose to remain silent as Y/N continued to rant. Ricky paused and stared at her face.
He wasn't even listening to Y/N at this point. All he could do was watch her face contort and her expression change as she continued to interrogate him. He observed at she shone the light towards him again playfully and move closer to him for effect like she'd seen in some of her favourite movies.
He couldn't help but admire the (one of many) tiny details that made her so beautiful. The way she used her hands when she spoke, the small yet noticeable freckles that dotted her face, the faint smell of her lavender body wash.
"Ricky, are you even listening to me? I'm worried about y-" Y/N was cut off by his lips being pressed on hers firmly. The kiss lasted for barely 3 seconds before she pulled away harshly, absolutely stunned.
Her eyes were practically popping out of her head. She slowly inched her body away from his as she tried to process what just happened. "Ricky what the hell-"
"I'm in love with you."
"What?" Ricky stood up from Y/N's desk chair and grabbed her hands gently. "I'm in love with you. And, I'm sorry if that's weird.. for you to hear or something, but.." Ricky slowly tried to piece his words together in his mind, "I just needed you to hear that."
Y/N shook her head vigorously and ripped her hands away from his. "Ricky, what are you doing?" Ricky stared at his shoes and fidgeted nervously. "You know I'm with Ethan, I'm-"
"I know, I know this wasn't good timing." Ricky stressed, running a hand through his curls and meeting her eyes.
"What did you expect me to do, Ricky? I'm happy with E, you know that." Ricky rolled his eyes and held his hand up to stop you. "I just thought you felt the same way I feel about you."
"I'm sorry." Y/N apologised, tears brimming her eyes.
"You have never, not once, not in the entire time that we've been friends, had feelings for me?" He didn't know what kind of response he was hoping for. But when Y/N silently shook her head, he could practically hear his heart shattering in his chest.
How could he be so stupid?
"Oh."
"Ricky, your friendship means so much to me."
"I don't- I don't want that. I don't want to do that. I wanna be more than that." Y/N wiped her stray tears with the sleeve of her sweater and stared at him blankly.
"Ricky, I'm sorry if you misinterpreted things... or if you thought we were-"
"No, uh, it's okay." Ricky shook his head and wiped his own tears as he watched her nervously fidget with her fingers, "I'm sorry I believed we could ever be something more."
And with that, he picked his backpack up off the floor and exited her room for the final time.
Once he made it out of her house he placed his skateboard on the pavement, tears clouding his vision the whole way home.
He screwed up. Big time.
N O T E !
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