119. Wanting It Badly Enough
Clarissa was shocked. She was trying to process what she had just heard. She wasn't sure which information to process first. Was she to process what Vincenzo's intentions were towards her when Letizia was his official girlfriend? Was she to process the threats he just threw at her about her prom date or was she to process how he had called her his woman. How were these revelations possible? She was confused and shocked. So she turned around to get some answers but it wasn't easy. When she turned to face him, his close proximity was not helping her form sentences. He was so close making her wary. When the wolf stood close he mostly smiled and looked relaxed but today he didnt look happy. His eyes were focused on her and she wasnt sure what to make of it. She decided to move away from him but as she took a step away, Vincenzo mistook her action for running away and he put his other had on the door too. Now she was caged against the door. Here she was staring into his eyes that awaited her response.
Vincenzo demanded " You don't walk away from me Terza. Here is my secret that no one knows but you... I love you Terza..."
Terza closed her eyes and tried to keep focused. Here he was confessing to her that he loved her. The way he had kissed her did demonstrate how he felt. She subconsciously reached her hand towards her lips recalling how she felt when he had kissed her. She felt strange. What kind of a mess was this? The worst part was she did have feelings for him. She had admired him from far for years. He had saved her life and always made her feel safe. He could make her happy. He tried hard too. When they hung out and he always made her smile. But what kind of a bad joke was this? She felt like she was trapped inside a maze in that moment. This was puzzling. Vincenzo had declared he loved her but he loved Letizia too. What was this?
Clarisa told herslef she could handle this. Her mother had taught her to control her feelings. She had to pull herself together. Based on his tone, it didn't sound like her knight in shining armour had any intentions of speaking to her parents or claim her in public. He referred to this information as his secret. What was this? Why did he even bother to say he loved her if he was dating Letizia. If Clarisa was his woman then what was he going with her? It made no sense at all. Was he breaking up with her?
Vincenzo waited for Clarissa's response but she was staring at him in shock and in deep in thought. She was standing unmoving leaning to the wall silently. Vincenzo decided to answer her questions. He could guess what she could be thinking. This was it. She was either going to sympathise with him or she was going to try to get away from him. Of course he had no intention of letting her walk away. She was his. He spoke in a firm tone " I know what you must be thinking. Where does Letizia come in? Why havent I broken up with her if you are my woman?Its not that simple.... Letizia.... She is in big trouble... She is on the Luciano's wanted list. As crazy as it sounds. They want her head on a plate... I am protecting her for my cousin Vitale. No one else knows but you... I have to keep her alive until they take her name of the hit list."
Clarisa closed her eyes. This was too much information. She was reminded of what Vincenzo had said to her just minutes ago. He had warned her to be careful when digging deep. Now she had found what she couldn't get her head around. But why was Letizia in trouble? She was a teenager. What had she done to make the Luciano's put a prize on her head?
Vincenzo took a deep breath as he continued" The Lucianos want her blood you know... They want it so badly... All because Letizia shot the bride's car in one of their weddings. They see her as a threat. That's why her family moved here... Now if you tell anyone, then she is dead. I can protect her... I have to protect her until she is out of danger... Vitale cant protect her because he is Italian. But I am counted as American so I can protect her. My father has no ties with the Lucianos but Rosarios in Italy are their next door neighbours in Sicily and do business together on many levels. I know you wont tell anyone Terza... I trust you.... Terza, if my father finds out he would send her back. I know he will. Letizia attacked my sister. To my father, Letizia is no concern of his. I cant let Letizia die. My cousin loves her...."
Clarisa thought she had heard enough. What was this? She never thought Vincenzo was going to be the first boy she kissed and the first boy she loved. But it was all wrong. This was tragic. She had to get out of there before she broke down to pieces. She didn't want to show weakness. If he expected her to wrap her arms around him and kiss him for his confession, he was wrong... She whispered " I won't tell anyone about anything you said to me today Vincenzo... I am good at keeping secrets... I will keep this secret as long as you need me to... I dont tell secrets that dont belong to me and are not mine to reveal.... But I can reveal secrets that are mine.... Here is what happens now... I tell you a secret because you told me yours... I .... fell in love with you the day you pulled me out of the pool...." His reaction halted her. He looked frozen now. He let his hands down from either side of her as he was staring at her with an unreadable expression. In a way she was satisfied. He had given her a shock and she had given it back to him.
Clarissa tried to ignore his reaction. His eyes sparkled like no other time. It was abit intimidating. She continued " I gave you a kiss last night to thank you after all this time... So I think we are even. Vincenzo..... I understand that you have to protect Letizia.... But it doesnt mean you have me... If you want me Vincenzo, you have to fight for me...Vitale is the one who has to fight for Letizia... And not you but I understand it. You are loyal to your blood... I respect that... I wont hold it against you... Actions have consequences.... I am going alone to the prom this time... So there was no need to throw your threats at me... But Vincenzo you are not the only one with duties and obligations... You have your duties and I have mine. My family need heirs. I have to get married one day whether I like it or not... If you want to be the one my father approves of, then you have to fight... " She then decided to get away. He was looking at her in a way that made her nervous. Why? She didnt know. He was looking at her so possessively but she was no one's. She took a few steps away and in his frozen state he let her to her relief. He didnt move as he was watching her silently. That was good. He let her speak. She was glad. He said how he felt and now was her turn.
Clarisa collected her courage and carried on looking into his eyes "Alot has changed now. The cards are out. I said I have feeings for you and you said you do too.... The secrets are out. But you are calling another girl your grilfriend. So if you think you have a claim over me, you are wrong... You have to fight for me and I let you.... Because I understand why you have to do what you are doing with protecting your cousin's girl. But that is all. it doesn't mean I will put my choices on hold for you and I know if you love me you wont expect me to. If you think I am going to change anything about my life path after your confession then you are wrong. Well, you have to catch up soon because my life isnt my own. I have to do what i have to do and so do you. You have duties and so do I. I have pressure from two families. You have loyalty to Rosarios but I have to split my loyalties. If you think your life is tough, you could try living under the rules of my granpa O'Neil and grandpa Giovanni who have decided every step I have taken in my life. I am an heir ....I am not a first born heir like you.... But still I have the weight of expectations on my shoulders. My life does not totally belong to me only.... I am not allowed to fail. I am not allowed to fall down. There are no excuses allowed... I have to win. I am only allowed to win and achieve. Thats it. Thats my duty as an O'Neil.... My life isnt my own... Just like how your life isnt yours either. I am the only one who can make my life my own.... Then I can make my own choices. But big wolf you are smart. I know you already know all this. But I thought I remind you....But let me remind you this.... Nothing matters to me more than my family. Well, Vincenzo if you want to be part of my life, you have to fight for it."
Clarisa gulped as she saw the effect of her last senstences on him. He expected a rejection but she wasn't a coward to reject him. She was being reasonable. It was cowardly to run away from a challenege. The big wolf was going to be boyfriend from hell in many ways. He was honourable but life with him could be a battlefield.
At that moment Clarisa really didnt want to hear his response which she could see coming. She wanted to just get out of there now that she had said her piece. She needed time to get her head around this. When you hung around with the wolf, maybe more secrets were going to drop out from the closet that you didnt want to see. So this was enough secrets for one day.... Too many actually... So she tried a strategy to avoid him to get some space to think. Clarisa started coughing as she realised he was going to speak "Can I have some water please... I am choking.. I talked too much..."
The concern that crossed Vincenzo's face made her heart melt at that time. Now that she knew he didnt love Letizia alot changed. Knowing this beast only cared for her changed everything. She watched him go towards the desk where there were water bottles. Once he was at a safe distance away from her at the other end of the room, Clarisa took a deep breath as she put her hand on the door handle. Clarisa knew she was going to pay for this but couldnt help it "Look. It has been lovely... I should go... We can talk later....I cant be missing from my room for too long.... Vincenzo... You do know that there is no future for me to imagine with you as my boyfriend as long as your girlfriend is in the picture.. Right? Call me when you sort out the mess with Letizia and if I am not married by that time, then you can come see my father to ask if you can take me to a coffee date..." She knew exactly what she was doing. She expected a reaction out of him and she wasn't disappointed.
He sharply turned around. It took seconds for her words to sink in and he narrowed his eyes. "Terza... "
Clarisa gave him a sweet smile and then put her hand on the door handle "Goodbye Vincenzo." Clarisa quickly opened the door and chuckled as she ran away. This was her father's hotel. She could get away from him no matter what gadgets he had that monitored the gate ways. He could see where she went but couldnt follow at her pace. She ran through the secret passage ways and to her relief he didnt catch her but this was not over. She left him hanging and she knew he was going to catch up with her at the war path challenge and again later for months and years to come. But was she worried? Hell no. She was an O'Neil. Whatever life was going to throw in her way, she was ready. Clarisa had been taught to stand strong but also not to take life too seriously. Her father always told her to act like a teenager while she was a teenager. This situation was so complex. The wolf had declared he loved her that was shocking to Clarisa. It hadnt sunk in yet. She had to think about what had just happened. But for her nothing truly had changed as she looked at the situation rationally. Her goal was going to be the same. She was going to study hard. She was going to reach the top.
Clarisa reached her hotel room in no time through the passages and she was running out of breath. Her chest was rising and falling as she laid down on her bed.... She sighed... What a mess her life was? it was her own fault running to the beast... She wanted to go back to sleep and managed to sleep for a few hours before she had to wake up for the game. her alarm clock went off and then as she got up, she noticed someone knocking on her door. She walked to the door and opened it noticing it was guard. He had a box in his hand "This is for you... from Vincenzo Rosario."
Clarisa nodded "Thank you." She received it and brought it in and closed the door. What could this be? She walked to her desk and put the box catiously on the table. She opened it slowly. There were flowers and chocolate in the box. there was a letter inside. She picked it up and opened the letter. It was his handwriting "Terza, I know you ran away because I overwhelmed you with the burden of my secrets..." She huffed. Oh it was more than overwhelming, big wolf. She then read the next sentence "I forgive you for running away when I was about to speak..." She shook her head. That was typical Vincenzo.... She carried on reading " My old man says; If you want something badly enough you will get it." The last sentence hit home instantly. It was true. That sentence summed up the situation. How badly did Vincenzo want her and how badly did she want him. It was true. if you wanted something badly you found a way to get it by all means.
Clarisa put the letter down and shook off her thoughts. She had to get back to the real world and had to come out of Vincenzo's secret world in that moment. This was such a strange feeling. When you hung out with Vicnenzo it felt like you were living in a different world to everyone else. She sighed. She decided to put it all behind her for now. She had a life to live.
Clarisa picked up the phone and dialled Vienna's room number. The phone didnt pick up as quickly. She smiled as her voice came out sleepy "Hi."
Clarisa decided to tell her about what had happened to Letizia's situation. She told her about what her father had told her last night. She couldnt call yesterday because phone lines didnt work from midnight to early morning for them. It was her father's strategy to make sure they went to bed and didnt go visiting.
Vienna was so happy to hear from Clarissa. She was relieved now. She put her phone back down and just then her alarm clock went off indicating it was time to start the day. She was still recovering from the dramas last night. She was relieved Letizia lived to see another day. She was getting closer and closer with letizia. She was her brother's girlfriend so they were meant to be close. Letizia wasn't so bad when she was with girls. Only when boys were around she went defensive. She did feel sorry for Letizia. It was hard being the only child in her family. She had pressure on her and she made mistakes. But she was going to be there for her.
Vienna sighed and walked to the bathroom for her morning shower. She didnt mind that she had to wake up at early in the morning for the warpath challenge but it was the first saturday of the first day of school holidays. The schedule was so packed leading to the prom at night that there was no other time to have the warpath game. It felt like a real challenge when you had to wake up early on a saturday. Nobody went to fight in any war game in the middle of the day. It made no sense.
Vienna got ready and made her way outside. As she made her way to the lobby of the hotel, her heart skipped a beat as she noticed Tristan waiting for her. He was sitting in the lounge area. As he saw her coming he smiled and walked towards her.
Vienna said "Good morning."
Tristan wrapped his arms around her and lifted her up in his arms surprising her. He carried her away bridal style as he explained " Good morning... I am sorry I didnt get the chance to thank you for the kiss properly yesterday. Alot happened that we didnt even get to talk about our first kiss after it happened. So I want us to have some private time..."
Vienna noticed she didnt recognise the way he was going. It seemed like he was now carrying her down to the basement of the hotel. She asked curiously as she bit her lip "Where are we going? Tristan..."
Tristan smiled as he heard his name from her lips. He warned "Now that you have given me your first kiss, I guess I can tell you this... When you bite your lip, you tempt me to kiss you..." They were now at the bottom of the stairs in a corridor.
Vienna blushed and looked away "Sorry..." She then subconsioculy bit her lip that made him stop walking. He put her down and narrowed his eyes "Are you teasing me Vienna?"
Vienna took a step back and her back hit the wall of the corridor. She shook her head "No... Its a reflex reaction."
Tristan took a step towards her " A reflex reaction... To what?"
Vienna bit her lip again making him go mad. He had tasted her lips the day before but still he wanted more. He put his hands on either side of her on the wall "You cant get away with it this time Vienna. Until now, you hadnt given me your first kiss... That meant I had to hold back... Now that we have reached this stage, everything can change... at your pace of course... But you cant get away with teasing me... What do you mean its a reflex reaction?"
Vienna took a deep breath. He was towering over her, looking down at her as his hands were on either side of her head on the wall. She tried not to bite her lip " I think its a nervous reflex reaction.... I read it in medical books... if you bite your lip, it means you are nervous... Sorry Tristan... I .... think when you look at me like that like ... you know... you are about to ... get mad .... I bite my lip..."
Tristan asked "Really Vienna? It is a nervous reaction... Then I forgive you for all the times you have teased me... When you bit your lip I felt like you were show casing to me what i couldnt touch... I would kiss you more in future and I would earn every single kiss from your lips..." He then took her hand in his "Lets go. Follow me..."
Tristan lead her to a door that said "No entry." She was about to argue but Tristan oepned the door and said "After you.. Trust me. You will like it..."
Vienna walked inside and as she entered her heart jumped. The room was decorated nicely with art. Italian art. There were portaraits. Mini statues. The place was lit up with roman style chandaliers. She slowly walked inside to inspect the art forms in the room. they were so beautiful. She looked at the portraits and beautiful hand made art.
Tristan explained "I got these for you from Italy. It came by ship so arrived here after i did. I actually shipped in more and it ahsnt arrived. I am thinking of making a warehouse full of art for you where you can get anything you like related to art. I will speak to your brother before I bring them to your house. If he damages them, he will answer to me. You are my girl. You can have anything you want..."
Vienna was so touched about how much he cared for her. She turned around "Thank you..." She then bit her lip making him narrow his eyes. But she decided to not make him wait for a kiss again. She walked to him, stood on her tiptoes and wrapped her arms around his neck and touched her lips to his. Their second kiss was as magical as the first one. But Tristan had other ideas. As they were kissing, he slowly wrapped his arms around her and lifted her up as he pulled away "Let me make you more comfortable... My queen doesnt need to work too hard for a kiss". He sat her up on a table in the corner of the room as he gently touched his lips to hers. The kiss was more comfortable now. She didnt have to try to reach him. He was the one leaning down. He wrapped his arms possessively around her as he kissed her. It felt good to kiss.
Vienna felt worried someone could walk in so she stopped kissing him and pulled away as she breathed hard "We should go... They are waiting..."
Trstan shook his head "You are my queen... They can wait for you... You are mine Vienna... Have you forgotten..." He then whispered in a demanding but teasing tone " Tell me who you belong to..."
Vienna replied as she blushed "Tristan... I belong to you"
Tristan attached his lips to hers and deepend the kiss and then pulled away "Dont you ever forget that..."
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