I groaned a bit as I turned on my side and snuggled my face into the warmth with a smile. Slowly I opened my eyes as I blinked a few times till my vision cleared out and his skin came into my view. I smiled as I kissed his jaw softly.

I knew he was sleeping peacefully like a small baby, so I decided to get up and let him sleep more not before checking the time, to make sure that I don't get him late.

I walked on my tippy toes till my bathroom as I tried to make minimum voice. After freshening up, I walked out smiling at the sleeping baby bear then my eyes settled on my diary on my study.

I don't remember keeping it on my study table...

I might've just forgotten after I kept it. I made my way towards it, taking the diary in my hand I sat on the chair then removed my necklace and unlocked it.

My fingers flipped through the pages as I read few of them.

He is called Blank Moon while I'm called smiling Dawn.

He can't be the man in black. He just can't.

Why is he such a sweet bear?

Why is he everything I don't deserve?

I sighed as I kept reading, I had even written few poems with my imagination about him, about me, about us as I read them too.

Flawed

Sat by the wooden bank,
My back facing him,
As I heard few clicks.

The water felt cool on my skin,
As he sits beside me
And we stare at the rising sun,
And moon disappearing.

We came from the dark,
as we walked through the light.
I'm the darkness
While he became my light.

My obsidian eyes find
The sun rays making him glow
His side face is perfect
Like the rest of him.

Why do the perfect species
Always find the flawed?

I turned the page as I saw another poem, named mistake.

I saw him and her,
In myself and him.
Walking down the street,
holding hands and giggling.

I saw him and her,
So in love.
And it's my mistake,
I'm the mistake.

I see pain,
And love,
And broken hearts.
And it's my mistake.

What a fool he is,
To see her with love,
When it was supposed to be me.
And it's my mistake.

I've always wanted to write a diary but I've failed too many times. Then I realised that I'm not a diary person so I started finding alternatives for it. Like how I wrote million little reasons I feel about Dalhyun and how I shouldn't.

Then I tried to write a song with a friend as I realised this new hobby, so I started writing my feeling in the form of poems and songs. Even my art plays an important role, as I draw whenever I'm sad or excited.

When I'm sad I majorly do charcoal drawings since I do the messy drawings to show my agitated mind. Whereas, when I'm excited I pick up my colours.

"Hey, good morning," I heard a sleepy voice as I looked up to find Dalhyun sitting up while rubbing his eyes. I immediately snap the book close then lock it and clasp my necklace back into its place.

I look up to find Dalhyun staring at me. Despite the fact that I told him about the million reasons written I don't want him to read it.

"Good morning, you sleeping bear," I smiled as I stood up and strode towards him.

"It seems like my nicknames are going to have such words attached with the word bear." He said as he pulled me onto his lap and wrapped his arms around my waist while I wrapped mine around his shoulders.

"You got it baby," I giggled against his skin as I prepped his face with kisses.

"Mhm, I like this," he mumbled as I kissed his nose. "Your lips are soft against my skin."

"That's because your skin is soft,"

"Your lips too," he said as he kissed me, I smiled as I kissed him back happily. Soon it turned to a heated make out session, as he leaned me back making me lay down on my back while he hovered over me.

We took a second break to breath while we stared into each other's eyes then he kissed me again. And my lord, it's becoming hard to stop myself from moaning.

But it finally came out when he trailed down sloppy kisses on my neck till my collarbone. "Dalhyun," it should've come out as a warning but instead I moaned his name. My eyes closed in bliss as a second later he stopped.

My eyes shot open to find him looking at me with an apologetic face, "I'm so sorry, I just... lost my control,"

"Hey, it's alright." I cupped him face between my palms, "I didn't stop you either so you're not at fault too." He didn't say anything as he continued to pout cutely. "Come on, you pouty bear, let's get some food in this empty tummy." I patted his tummy.

"I'm going to miss you so much," I mumbled against his chest as I hugged him more tightly                   

"I'm going to miss you so much," I mumbled against his chest as I hugged him more tightly. "I don't want you to go, my winter bear."

It was finally time for him to go, as I hugged him tightly while some insane ideas of kidnapping him ran through my mind.

"I know you don't want me to go. But I need to fly back to Korea. My XO is waiting for me."

"Can I kidnap you?" I made puppy eyes at him while pouting cutely.

He chuckled, "then what will happen to Kyung?"

I immediately pushed him, "on the second thought, you can go. I'll kidnap Kyung instead."

"Hey! You're mine, not Kyung's!" He pulled me in his arms as he prepped my face with kisses while I giggled and hugged him back. "You both are mine, and I'm not sharing either of you."

"So territorial," I teased, "I didn't know that bears are territorial." He huffed as he squeezed the life out of me but I didn't mind.

"I'm going to miss you, Shiya." I felt tears surfacing my eyelids as I whimpered. Hearing the sound he immediately stepped away as he glanced at me with worry.

"Sorry, I often get emotional." I looked up at the ceiling as I fanned my face to keep my tears from falling.

"Hey, it's alright... to cry." He whispered as he pulled me in his arms again.

"Dalhyun... I just want you to know that you've a very special place in my heart, and you always will. Please don't forget this."

"I won't," I knew he was smiling as I smiled a bit too. "Will you visit me during this... thanksgiving vacation?"

I sighed sadly, "I'm not sure Dali, I told you that I'll visit Korea only with Tani. And how her studies look, I don't think I can."

He nodded sadly then a minute later he said, "Bye, Shiya Saathvik." He started walking away as my hand stretched ahead which where holding his. As he walked away his hand left mine and then... he disappeared.

"Bye Dalhyun, I love you."

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