I haven't found the right one yet.

My pickings are getting slim.

Jack was never around.

Richard was just plain stalkerish.

Ed had severe mommy issues.

John was into the young ones.

Dennis was too old school.

Edmund he only liked educated girls.

Charles couldn't do anything for himself.

Jeffrey was into guys.

And Ted well he only liked brunettes.

Also, they all had one important thing in common.

They got caught.

Now that's really not my thing.