Rudolph

Hermey's skin tasted like peppermint. I almost licked his cheek when I kissed it.

I then asked him on a date, to which he agreed. We decided we were going to watch the Northern Lights tonight.

We finished decorating in a giggly haze. Hermey is so so cute when he giggles like that.

I don't know why I kissed him— I wasn't even thinking about it. But the feeling of his muscular legs on my back had been so tantalizing, like sugarplums on a gingerbread house.

I was also super nervous about our date. I didn't know if he knew about my eggnog overdose, after Clarice had broken up with me.

I had had a huge rock concert with Frosty the Snowman that night. I felt terrible putting on a fake face for all of my fans. Then I saw the jug of eggnog delivered backstage after the show. I chugged it and order five more jugs, saying they were for some guests.

I had nearly died that night. If I weren't such a rock star, if I weren't such a naughty reindeer, I wouldn't have been in that situation.

But it happened and Hermey would hate me so much for that if he knew.

Hermey

I felt like I was flying with Santa in his sleigh when Rudolph kissed me and asked me to go with him on a date. I was so excited!

I hadn't had a date since I had went on a date with Buddy the Elf. That date ended soooooo badly, that I don't even want to think about it.

I made up some eggnog to take for our date. I heard that he loved eggnog. But they always said it in a strange way. I hope they're right.

There was a knock on my door.

"Who is it?" I giggled.

"It's Clarice."

Clarice? "Come in!"

Clarice entered.

"I think you going with Rudolph is a bad idea," she sniffed.

I turned to her. "What do you mean, Clarice?" I asked her.

Clarice's eyes fluttered with tears. "Something happened a while back, and that eggnog will only make it worse. I'm sorry, Hermey. Rudolph is an addict. He's been trying to get off for ages."

"Tha-that can't be true," I said.

"It is," Clarice said. "Two years ago he got drunk on the stuff and... and.."

"And what?" I whispered.

"He was... he was with the Grinch." Clarice shut her eyes.

"The Grinch!? How!?" I shouted, nearly spilling the eggnog.

Then Clarice told me, with too many details, what Rudolph and the Grinch has been doing together.

Rudolph

I put on my best tie and headed out to see Hermey. We had agreed to meet at the pavilion before the lights started.

I got there, and Hermey was already there. It looked like he had been crying.

I frowned. "What's wrong, Hermey?" I asked.

"Everything." Hermey stamped his foot a bit. "Why had you been with the Grinch!?"

I gasped. "You weren't supposed to know that! Who told you!?" I shouted.

"Clarice did. You weren't going to tell me?" Hermey said.

"I was planning to, but not today! Hermey, that was two years ago! There's nothing between me and the Grinch! I was—"

"Drunk. I know," Hermey said. "I don't even know why I fell for you, Rudolph. I'm just a stupid dentist elf." 

"No you're not," I started, just as Hermey stormed off.

"I think this is for the best," Hermey called. "I'm leaving on Christmas Eve."

I started to cry as he ran off.

Hermey

Between blurry tears and blowing my nose, I booked my flight for New York. Then, I decided to call an old... friend...

"Hi!!!!!!!" He squealed. "How's the North Pole!? How's SANTA doing!?!?"

"Hi, Buddy," I said quietly, "Do you want to... See me? On Christmas?"