I have time to kill so I walk through every aisle of the grocery store. I buy a bunch of junk food to drown my woes. I have chips, cookies, popcorn, soda, frozen pizza, and ice cream in my basket. It's going to be as good of a night as I can make it.

I go to the checkout and try not to make eye contact with the cashier. I don't want to be judged for my poor choices. I am already having a rough night.

"Paper or plastic?" she asks nonchalantly.
"Ummm...paper."

I can at least try to be somewhat environmentally friendly.

She stuffs all of my things into one bag. It looks like it's about to pop, but I'm not about to ask her to put them into separate bags.

I leave the grocery store and start walking back to my apartment. As I turn the corner, I bump headfirst into someone and my bag falls to the floor and rips wide open.

'Shit!' I mutter to myself.

I don't even look up and I just try to get everything back into the broken bag.

"Need some help?" the stranger asks.
"No, I'm alright," I start to say. Then, I look up because I recognize the voice.
"You sure?" he says as he smiles at me.

I burst into tears.

"Woah, woah, woah. What's wrong? Relax, it's okay," he says with his hands in the air at chest height.

I'm at my wit's end tonight, plus I have already drank about four glasses of wine at this point.

I look at him again.

"I'm sorry," I sigh.
"It's okay, no one got hurt."
"Not about that," I whine. "You know what I mean..."
"Stop saying sorry. I said it was okay. It just sucks. But it's okay. And I do understand. It just sucks."
"I know. But I don't know what to do."
He looks puzzled. "What do you mean? You already did it."
Tears are streaming down my face as I say, "But I miss you."

I blurt it out. The wine is bringing out my real emotions.

"I miss you too," he says with a gentle kindness.
"I don't know what to do."
"What do you want?"
"You."

And that's the truth. The real truth. I want him. No matter what I am going through, I know that I want him. And it's what's making everything else so hard.

"I want you too."

He picks the stuff off the floor, shoves it into whatever's left of the bag, takes my hand, and we walk back to my apartment.

When we get in, he helps me put the stuff away in the freezer and pantry. Then he faces me.

"Did you mean what you said outside?"
"What?"
"That you want me?"
"Yes. No. I don't know. Yes."

He laughs. It's infuriating. But I am a mess.

"Why are you laughing?"
"Because you're cute when you're flustered."
"Ughhh. Don't make fun of me."
"I'm not."

He pulls me into a hug. It feels great. And it's just what I need.

I look up at him into his eyes. He looks down at me. And then I kiss him. And he kisses me back.

After we pull away from each other, we look into each other's eyes.

"So, you miss me or something?" he jokes.
I hit his arm. "Yes. Fine. I miss you."

He smiles and pulls me into another hug.

"I really missed you," he says as he breathes into my hair.
"Did you now?" It's my turn to joke
"Yes."
"Wait a minute!" I say with a start.

I think back to before our hug that led to a kiss. I think back to the street corner.

I grill him. "Where were you going when we bumped into each other?"
"To come see you. To maybe make you change your mind. I don't know. I just felt awful. I haven't been able to sleep. I just wanted to see you. I was a jerk to you and wanted to apologize. I was just really hurt. I'm sorry."
"I'm sorry too."

He hugs me again, and I stuff my face into his chest as I say, "Can we start over?
"I'd like that," he confirms.

He releases me and looks at me, "So, what are you up to?"
"I was drinking wine. And then I was going to go to bed. Do you want some wine?"

"And do you want to stay over?" I also want to ask. But it's too soon for that.

"Yeah, but I warn you...if I start drinking, I may fall asleep on you."
"On me, on me?" I ask.
"Yup," he smirks.

Oh my god. I missed that face. My insides are melting.

"Is that a promise or a threat?" I am flirting back, and I know it.
"What do you want it to be?"
"Promise," I say with a look I'm hoping melts his insides as much as his are to me.
"Then yup. I promise. See ya in the morning!"

I hit his arm again. I like this playful banter. And I am feeling much better. He puts me in such a good mood. And so quickly. I had almost forgotten that I went to the store to swallow my woes via food.

He starts pouring some wine in a glass and all I can do is look at him. I really like this. I really like him. And, I really am in trouble. Again.

https://youtu.be/mryeWxUCO6k