(If that meme isn't me- XD)

Hey yall! How are you guys doing? We're halfway through summer, at least where I live. I realized the school year will be very busy for me next year so it might be best if I continued with my watch ~20 days postage of episodes. Hope yall are okay with that. That being said, enjoy this new chapter!

Warnings: Remus and Bonnie being the chaotic duo we know and love.

Deceit
I watched Patton walk out the door silently, my jaw locked. Shaking my head, I fly upstairs. Who the frick is messing up my house and who is this Remus character? My eyes fell on two teenagers. Of course. One with a taped on brown mustache who was wearing the most hideous pair of shoes I have ever seen and the other who looked like an art critique. 

"Whaaaaaat?" Mustache gremlin whined, "It's not like this house belongs to anyone."

"I know that but if you get hurt, I will have to strangle you."

"Kinky." The critique squinted at the rat goblin.

"Indeed." The rat got off the broken table and looked around again. Time to get my haunting on.

I slowly creaked open the window. The fashionable one glanced over but paid no mind as she slapped who I assume is Remus over the head. "Don't you think we should check on Patton?"

Remus blew a raspberry at her, "He left last chapter. It's just us alone with the ghost child."

She nodded,  "Fair point fair point."

I squinted. How did they- Wait they know about the whole chapter thing?

"Because we're all powerful beings of the universe and obviously." The critique filled in. Remus tilted his head. "I had the random urge to inform the universe of such truths."

"As you should." She smiled.

"That's why I did it."

"Ayyyyye" He shot finger guns at her. 

"Ayyyyyye" She responded likewise. Humans are so weird. The green squeaky shoes man looked around the area again. He paused when seeing my room. Oh no. He turned to his partner and wiggled his eyebrows.

“Wanna break in?”

“Why would we break in when we could just walk in?” The other asked.

“Why would we walk in when we could just break in?” He asked back.

“Ah!” She face palmed with a grin, tilting her head back. “Of course! How genius!” 

Wait what exactly do they mean by break in-

Mustache took a few steps back before hurling himself naruto style at my door. His head flew in, but his shoulders got stuck. MY DOOR!!!!!!!! THAT IDIOT RAN HIS FREAKING HEAD THROUGH MY DOOR!

He laughed loudly. He’s definitely concussed. Now’s a perfect time to strangle him for breaking my freaking door. 

Before I could enact the strangling, the other walked over. “Huh. I expected you to bounce off it. It must be a really old door.” I scoffed. It’s not that old. My family built this house when I was like ten. She traced her fingers on the splintered wood. “It’s ancient.”

Wow. Freaking rude. I crossed my arms, glaring at them. I hate these humans. 

I heard a wood chunk hit my bedroom floor, “It tastes disgusting.” Okay that’s it. 

I dramatically swooshed my cape at them, sending a large gust of wind towards them. The girl paused and looked around. 

“What was that?” Green shoes called.

The girl shrugged, “A window must be open or the universe is telling us that yellow is the color of joy.” GRRRRRMMMMMMMMMMM. I DON’T WANT TO TALK TO YOU, GET OUT.

“Ahhhh hmmmmm… Yeah, it’s obviously yellow but do you think it was telling us that blue is the color of purple?”

“No, you imbecile. Blue is the color of green plus the tears of our enemies, minus the moon squared.” What are these buffoons going on about? "Idiot."

"Ah, you're right, you're right."

"I always am." I heard a raspberry get blown from the other side of the door. The girl laughed. These two should be in a mental hospital. Then separated. By a concrete wall the size of a continent.

"Hey come look over here!" I heard my lock click before the door opened. Dang it! The goblin was walking backwards, swinging the door open with him. He grinned at the girl. "After you, Bonnieseveech." The girl, Bonnie I guess is what I'll call her, dipped her head.

"You are too kind Remeees!" She walked into my room and began looking around. No no no no no no no. 

I zipped into my room, "GO AWAY!" My voice rang through the house, the force picked up dust. Huh. Guess I can do that.

Remeees's eyebrows rose. The door swung shut, making it so he was facing the room. "Huh. What was that?"

"The angry forces of the universe telling us that sign? Or a trap set up by the owners of the house." She shrugged, "Both work."

"Could be the ghost," I rolled my eyes.

She nodded, "It could be, but forces are more likely."

"Ah of course, of course. Do you think we should leave?"

"Only if you want to."

"I'm good with continuing." 

"Aaayyyyye what a coincidence! As am I!"

What am I listening to? Okay fine. These idiots won't listen to me. I'll just find out what they want and then they'll be on their way. 

Bonnie began walking around my room. She silently opened drawers and began shuffling through items. Screw her, honestly. Nosey little-

"Did you find anything?" The door man asked. 

"I think so," She grinned and turned to him. What does she- oh no. She held a brown leather book. She began flipping through the pages.

“Oooooo,” She walked closer so door boy could read over or under her shoulder. He’s not planning on staying there, is he? I stared at the book, not making a sound. What… That book has been there all that time. I didn't realize… How did it get there.. I thought Elizabeth took it. I thought at the very least it would be destroyed. It must be hundreds of years old.

“It must be hundreds of years old.” The girl said, carefully turning the bridle pages. 

“Lets light it on fire!”

“Hnnnehhh, maybe once I finish reading it?” The boy sighed.

“Okayyyy nerddddd,” She bopped him on the head with the book. Surprisingly, the book held its ground. I continued to stare at the fragile book. I couldn’t do anything. I don’t know what to do.

1079 words

Good news! Remus is stuck in a door so he can't steal your kneecaps this time! I hope you all enjoyed the chaos. I know Janus definitely doesn't.  They'll learn to love it though 😁 At least, they better.

Janus: I refuse. These idiots deserve to rot and die alone.

Wowwww dramatic much?

Janus: They are destroying my family's house.

Fair point. Anyways! Have a wonderful rest of your day, sisters, brothers, and non binary others! Stay awesome!!!!!

💖Maybay4