I'm back gremlins! How ya doin? Summer is here and, though I'm planning for a bazillion things, I should still have more time! That means I'll hopefully post more often! Who knows, I might even get back to once a week! I want to try and finish the story this summer, but I also have a thousand other goals and am going to get a job... wish me luck lol. But anyways, your wait is over! Let's check in on our favorite slithering snek boi! (Some non binary peeps I know are okay with being called boi, but if that doesn't sit right with any of you, let me know and I'll change it!)

Warnings: Grumpy child, the chaotic Patton Protection Squad, mentions of kneecaps. And French. Aaaa.

Sarah

“You’re such an elephant ear!” Hannah exaggeratedly expressed.

“Oh shush,” I replied, waving her off. She rolled her eyes and continued to try to reach for the computer that I was attempting to fix. “Chill, I’ve got it.”

“You’ve been saying that for the last fifteen minutes. Let me try.” I lifted the computer higher out of her reach. Despite being younger than me, we were about the same height. This made preventing her from getting the computer a bit more difficult. 

Our bickering was brought to an end by the door swinging open. “Guys!” We turned to see Marly rush in. Hannah stood up. 

“What’s going on?” She asked.

“The fanfic.” I slapped my face.

“Oh my heavens, what is Mary up to now?” 

“Being an idiot. Patton and Janus are fighting.” I sighed and I heard Hannah scoff. 

“Do they both need support?” Hannah asked.

“No, Patton’s covered from what I read. It’s Janus who we need to worry about.” Shaking my head, I got up and walked over to the book shelf.

“They just can’t get a break,” I muttered. My fingers brushed the books on the shelf before I pulled out the first Harry Potter book. The cover began to slide off to reveal a much different book, but I quickly adjusted it so no onlookers could see. I brought it over to the coffee table and placed it open next to the computer. 

I shared a look with the other girls before stepping into the book. A blinding light flashed before I opened my eyes; I was on the floor of our hideout. It was a wooden shack that was abandoned in the wood. We had found it a few months ago. Once we discovered it was abandoned, we cleaned it up, installed lighting, and put in a mini fridge. I quickly moved out of the way, just in time for Marly to fall right where I was. I sighed, smiling. It’s been a while since we’ve come back. 

“Is Janus at Patton’s house?” I asked Marly as I walked to the door and looked out. The sun was up. It looked to be around 5pm.

“Nope, they’re at their house.” I nodded and turned to see Hannah falling into the room. I laughed, which received a scrunched up face in return. Hannah picked up the open book on the ground, closed it, then put it under the rug. Can’t have the others discover our secret.

“Come on,” I held the door open as the others walked out. 

We slowly made our way to the Davis house.

“So what’s the plan?”

“I thought you had one.” She sighed.

“Oh come on, you always have the plan.”

“Well not this time, guess we’re going with whatever happens.” There’s no way Patton couldn’t hear the sighs from where he stood. Or laid. Or whatever he was doing. 

We hiked in silence for a few more minutes. “Do you guys like how Mary incorporated the orange side-”

“Shhhhhhh! We’re here.” We stepped up to the house. I glanced at Marly who shrugged and opened the door. Hannah watched carefully from behind. She scrunched her nose.

“Are we sure this is a good idea?” She asked.

“Nope.” I replied before stepping in. I cupped my hands around my mouth, “JANUS!” Silence rung through the house. “CHILD!” Still nothing. “SMALL HOBBITED GREMLIN.” I heard Marly snicker. 

We looked around the house carefully. I was tempted to ask if we should go upstairs before catching a yellow glow from the ceiling. I squinted at it, looking closer. “Found them,” I said, pointing to the glowing gaze. 

The eyes widened at the recognition and everyone else turned to face them. Their bowler hat was sticking to their head even though it was upside down and poking through the ceiling. Ghost logic. What in the heck.

"Hey," Marly called out, "Come down here!"

Janus floated down very slowly and we could see the snake side of their face clearly. They were looking at us carefully. 

"You're the people who were with Mary…" he muttered, "How can you see me?"

Ummm. I looked to the others, "Magical powers granted by Mary?" Hannah offered. They squinted before nodding slightly.

"Leave." They commanded. A gust of wind was blasted into our faces, causing Hannah to stumble back. I brushed my hair out of my mouth.

"Okay at what point do we question all that ghosts can do?" Marly asked. I paused. How does that work anyway? I mean, we're interdimensional editors who fly across stories, but we're not ghosts. 

"Yeah, what is it with that any-"

"Guys, we can talk about that later!" Hannah butt in. "What's going on between you and Patton?" 

Something flickered through Janus's eye, but their expression remained unreadable. "I don't know what you're talking about."

"Bull crap," I stated, crossing my arms.

"And even if I did," they continued, their smooth voice glossing over what I said as if I hadn’t spoken, "I have no reason to tell you anything. I do not know you and have no wish to get to know you. Leave my house." 

Marly took one look around, “Hmm nein.” 

Janus squinted, “Pardon?”

“Non” Hannah replied with that French accent. Their expression slipped to surprise before it was quickly masked again.

“Tu parles français?” Janus watched her suspiciously (You speak French?).

“Oui un peu.” (A little bit)

They nodded slightly. At least the French seemed to have intrigued them. I mean, they probably haven’t heard it in a few hundred years and I think it’s their first language. “Thank you for entering my home and attempting conversation, it’s greatly appreciated. But you’ve overstayed your welcome.”

“You’re welcome,” I stated before walking into the kitchen and sitting on the counter. It’s not like I can sit on the couch with the mice there, and this is a better view anyway. Janus rolled their eyes.

“Make yourself at home,” They drawled, voice dripping with sarcasm. 

“If you insist,” I chirped, looking around the house from my seat. Marly snorted and Janus rubbed their eyes. 

“Come on Janus, if you tell us what’s going on we’ll leave.” Hannah tried and received a glare in return.

“Nothing happened. I’m perfectly fine. As fine as I was for the last hundred years and as fine as I’ll be for the next.” 

“You and Patton got in a fight,” Marly stated, “Wait, who’s gonna keep the mice? It’s like dividing up the kids.” Janus’s nails pressed into their palms.

“They are staying here because this is their home. They’ve lived here for generations.” Janus stated, their calm voice being infested with annoyance. 

“But you didn’t deny the fight,” Marly pointed out causing Janus to pause. 

“Because,” They started slowly, as if debating their next words, “You wouldn’t believe me either way if I denied the events or not. Might as well allow you to play your little game.” I sighed, we’re not getting anywhere.

“Let’s say this was a game. Why not play? It doesn’t have to be real. If you had gotten in a fight with Patton, what would be going through your mind right now?” I pressed.

“If I had gotten into a fight with that human that I have very limited knowledge of, I would be perfectly fine. Though more withdrawn from human interaction. All humans.” They squinted at me to help get their message across. 

“Jokes on you, Sarah isn’t human, they’re an elephant ear.” Janus blinked, clearly taken off guard. Dang it, I should have brought a pillow to chuck at Hannah’s face.

“And Hannah’s a speck of belly button lint.” I snarked back. Marly chuckled at our anticks. Janus glanced at Marly as if expecting her to say something ridiculous too. She shrugged.

“What are you looking at me for? I’m obviously an alien sent to kill all humans and the only reason I haven’t done it is because Mary saved my life and I’m indebted to her.” I nodded, seems logical enough to me. 

Janus stared at her for a moment. “Sadly, that is the most believable statement said.” They shook their head, “Now what do you want?” 

“I know Mary wants your kneecaps-”

“Mary wants everybody’s kneecaps.”

“And Janus is a part of everybody.”

“Not wrong.”

“Am I ever?”

“Yes, quite often actually.”

“Shut.”

“Pardon me,” Janus cut in, “You still haven’t answered my question. I don’t care what Mary wants, I don’t even care about what you want, I just want you out of my house.”

“So you can sulk in solitude?”

“Yes!” They expressed, arms flying into the air. “I just want to be alone! I don’t need you three to be my thérapeute!” They paused, thinking over what they said, “... Whatever the English word for it is. Leave my house. Get out. I don’t want you here. I don’t know you and I don’t want to know you.” Their voice rang through the air. I glanced at the girls. Marly was watching Janus carefully and Hannah muttered something under her breath. Janus turned their glare to her. “What?”

“The word is therapist.” They rolled their eyes and sighed before floating up again. 

“Great. Wonderful. Fine. Do whatever you want. Make all the mess in the world and see if I care to clean it up. Enjoy your stay.” Janus flew up through the ceiling and back to –what I believe to be– their room. 

I glanced at the other girls. “At least they know someone’s there for them?” Marly tried. 

I sighed, shaking my head, “We should head back. Hopefully this thing resolves itself.”

Reluctantly, the other two agreed to my suggestion. We bid farewell to the mice before heading out the door. Patton’s the only one who can fix their relationship. If Janus is willing to listen.

1871 Words in the English Language. 8 in French. 1879 in total! ... please say i did my math right.

But anyways! I hope you enjoyed this chapter! Shout out to Sarah my Manwife who let me do a chapter from their perspective! I bsed most of it but they read it over and agreed with the Sarah in the story. I take that as a personal win.

You are all amazing! I hope you are all taking care of yourselves and if not... 🔪. I mean uh 💖. Totally not threatening you to be nice to yourself. Yeaaaaah. Love you all! Until next time sisters, brothers, and non binary others! Peace out!

💖Maybay4