Chapter Fourteen: Flight of Freedom

   After waiting for each other to tack up the horses and trotting towards the gates, I had a private word with Delrand. I hope you won’t think less of me. After all, it was just the one time.

   It happened a long time ago. I can’t change the past, the same as I can’t change our fates. And I couldn’t think less of you, even if you ran away from me right now. I had to hand it to him; he was marvellous when it came to romantic words.

   I had decided to take Volareus this time, Delrand was on Rose and the knights were each on their own steeds. Most of them were bred to be war-horses. However, Tristan’s and Galahad’s were more in the similar fashion to Rose. Lancelot, being the captain of them, had the more muscular stallion. I owned the only female horse in the stables.

   ‘Where are we actually going?’ asked Galahad as we passed under the gate-arch.

   ‘Where ever everyone wants to go,’ answered Delrand.

   We all began to trot off as the talk continued. ‘As far as we can get,’ Gawain suggested.

   ‘Race?’ I asked.

   ‘One, two, three.’

   On three, we galloped off as quickly as possible. I knew Delrand would either not join in or, if he did, take the lead. I was in no hurry to see a clear leader; nor were the others by the look of things. Looking left to right, I saw we were all in an oscillating line.

   We rode on and on. How far we were from Camelot’s walls was unknown to us all. I knew I couldn’t push Volareus any further, he was so unpredictable. But I soon found out that I already had.

   On the next hilltop he bolted onto his rear legs. I held on tightly around his neck and waited for him to regain contact with the ground. He pawed at the air before him as though a wall had blocked his vision. The others had ridden past me, unsure whether I was in control or not.

   I searched for the nearest rider to me. Dagonet was the only one I could see from where my head was. Volareus was unwilling to relax. This had happened out of my control. With Rose, I could tell instantly what she had in mind as a next move. Things were different with Volareus, he did things upon impulse alone.

   I watched Dagonet dismount and sprint towards me. He ran in front of Volareus’ head, jumped and grabbed the head gear. He pulled down to make Volareus give in. I moved my hands back onto the reins and took a few deep breaths. Dagonet stroked Volareus’ cheek and forehead until he had calmed down. I have never trusted this mysterious stallion and probably never will. Only Delrand seemed to be the only person so far with the talent to control him.

   After a couple of minutes, we regrouped and stayed upon the hilltop for about an hour, talking.

   ‘Dagonet, I owe you.’

   ‘Don’t bother. It was mere sense of duty that I helped you,’ he said. Dagonet was always the quieter one. He never liked debts or pay backs.

   ‘Nothing I can do to persuade you?’

   ‘Nope.’

   ‘Dag, you can at least hold her in some kind of tie,’ Bors intervened. He and Dagonet were usually inseparable, almost true brotherhood had existed between them from day one.

   ‘There would be no point.’

   ‘Bors, keep out of it. If he doesn’t want me to have a debt, then I’m happy to leave it at that.’

   The sun glided through the sky towards the afternoon. An eagle soared under the few clouds. I watched it closely. I still wanted to experience flying, to be able to have the wind flow over me in a cool stream. I soon realised that it was flapping towards where we stood. I remembered about Oscar, and that he preferred to transform into birds of prey.

   ‘Delrand, isn’t that Oscar?’

   He looked up to where my gaze was pointing. ‘Yes, they finally reached us.’

   ‘Who’s Oscar?’ asked Tristan.

   ‘A friend,’ Delrand merely replied. I searched the plain beneath where the eagle flew. Spotting two wolves (one grey, the other brown) running through the wild grass, I remembered Harrod and Justin. I had missed Justin and Oscar; though less keen to remember my brief encounters with Harrod.

   ‘Your friend is an eagle?’ Tristan sounded a little defied by this when he realised where mine and Delrand’s attention was focused.

   ‘That is not what he is in reality.’

   We waited for Oscar to land on the ground. The knights hadn’t noticed the two wolves that had been bounding towards us. The horses whinnied at the sight of the animals that appeared over the hill ridge in front of us (all but Rose and Volareus).

   I watched the reactions on the knights' faces as Delrand’s friends transformed to their human states.

   ‘More magicians. You cease to amaze me how many friends you’ve made away from home, Elara,’ Tristan stated.

   ‘They’re more friends with Delrand than with me. These are Harrod, Justin and Oscar.’ As I said their names they each bowed respectively. ‘And these are Tristan, Gawain, Galahad, Lancelot, Dagonet and Bors.’ I relayed the knights’ names to the recent arrivals.

   ‘Pleasure to meet you all,’ Justin spoke out. The knights weren’t willing to return the favour very suddenly.

   ‘How are you heading back?’ Harrod asked.

   ‘Horse-back,’ said Delrand.

   ‘Can’t we run with them?’ I asked him.

   He looked over his shoulder at the distant towers. ‘It’s a long way.’

   ‘That hasn’t been a problem before.’

   ‘If you want to.’ He didn’t sound optimistic about it.

   ‘We haven’t done it in awhile. And Merlin did mention to keep up the practice.’

   ‘Very well.’

   I turned to my cousin. ‘Tristan, can you take Volareus back with you, please?’

   ‘What are you doing?’ he asked, confused.

   ‘Running back,’ I stated.

   ‘Won’t that take you hours?’

   ‘Not the way we do it.’ Delrand and I dismounted and went to stand with the three on foot. We each transformed into our preferred options (four wolves and one eagle). From my degraded view I took in the looks on the knights’ faces; they didn’t look happy about my decision. I ran between two of them with Delrand on one side. After a few large strides I stopped and turned around. The knights began to follow reluctantly behind.

   Why did you make me do this? came Delrand’s voice in my head.

   You shouldn’t be the one complaining. And you didn’t have to join me; you could have stayed with them. It wasn’t something I was forcing you into.

   There seemed to be a nudging in my head from him, he seemed annoyed. Since I’m like this now, we should get going.

   Back inside, I thought it best to keep the knights as far away as possible from Delrand’s friends. It was much harder than it sounded. Firstly, the knights expected me to hang around with them. Secondly, I had an urge to be with Delrand for the rest of the day and night. And Delrand was expected to be with Justin, Oscar and Harrod. I wanted to be alone when I first realised this, but then thought that maybe all my friends needed to share their time around each other at some expense.

   ‘How well are you three with reading minds?’ Gawain asked, though not the best question.

   ‘Our magic does not extend to mind reading,’ answered Oscar. He was more willing (out of the three) to befriend the knights.

   ‘But if you’re friends with Delrand surely you’re as powerful as he is.’ At this I turned to Delrand and smiled.

   ‘Not really.’

   ‘Elara?’

   I turned back to my friends with a thoughtful expression. ‘Er... they know each other in a different way than I know you lot.’ It wasn’t easy to explain.

   Need some help?

   Yes, please.

   ‘Though you seven have been friends for many years as knights; we are friends merely because of our magic. It doesn’t matter whether our magic is the same or not.’

   ‘The same?’

   ‘They’re wizards and I’m a sorcerer. Sorcery is a much stronger form of magic. Though I can see that it means nothing to you.’

   I couldn’t help but laugh at this. The problem was that if I was made to choose a side, I was torn by two decisions, with a bad outcome either way.

   Thank you.

   You’re welcome.

   After dinner, I remained behind with Delrand to speak with our associates. He started. ‘Why did it take you so long to get here?’

   ‘We had some other business to deal with on the way,’ answered Justin.

   ‘More important than being here to sort out tactics?’ Delrand questioned.

   ‘Wait, I am not going to test myself against them,’ I complained.

   ‘Why not?’

   ‘B... because they’ll cheat.’

   ‘And how will that make a difference against you? Remember, that Mordred will try deception when it comes to it,’ Delrand tried to persuade me.

   I gave in. ‘When?’

   ‘Soon,’ said Oscar.

   ‘That doesn’t help,’ I stated.

   ‘You’re not meant to know exactly when something like this is meant to start. It’s a test to see what your reflexes are like.’

   Upstairs in my room, I stood on the balcony alone. I was pondering on my thoughts and whether I should just get the whole waiting process out of the way. I knew that loneliness was inevitable to happen to me if I was really the one to whom this destiny belonged.

   I watched the stars in the night sky. There was a breeze tonight and it was refreshing as it hit my face and whipped through my hair. Remembering seeing Oscar in the air earlier that day, I wanted to see what flying was like first hand.

   I pictured a falcon in my head and felt the process as I changed into the form. I opened my eyes and adjusting to the strange vision of my familiar surroundings. I hopped onto the balcony barrier and flapped my wings in assurance. Flapping hard and jumping off the stone beneath my claws, I waited for clearance of any success. I wasn’t falling and the walls had become further away. In triumph of my effort, I climbed up towards the heavens. It felt wonderful, freer than as a wolf on the ground. I spiralled around and glided in wide circles. Despite the night’s lack of light, I could distinguish stone walls from hedgerows. I tried hovering, which worked. It became silent up in the air, except for the air in my ears (wherever they were now).

   A screech sounded nearby over the rush of wind. I couldn’t be sure if it was Oscar. I held my ground (or rather space) and watched for any give away signs to my company. Maybe being alone now of all times was a bad idea. I flew off into the night. I couldn’t head back towards Camelot straight away; the other bird was in the way. I hovered again and checked the surrounding space. It had followed me and I wasn’t in the mood for tricks or games.

   Who are you? I asked as harshly as I could through my mind to his.

   Can’t you tell by my persistence? My worst situation had been clarified. It was Mordred and he had been watching me all this time. As soon as I had flown off the veranda, he had turned up.

   What do you want with me? I’ve already made my choice clear and I haven’t changed my mind recently.

   He screeched loudly into the air. I’ve decided to give you another chance, now. Join me and you’ll be making your life in less danger of being destroyed.

   Flapping my wings warningly, I clawed and screeched back. As we told you the first time, if one of us dies trying to kill you, so be it. Just remember the strength I used on you in our last meeting.

   How could I forget? It showed me your capabilities. Delrand has taught you well indeed. Too bad he won’t be able to finish the job. Did you want to get it over with now or later on the battle field?

   How could he have known what I was thinking of before? It wasn’t as though I was speaking it openly. Is that why you’re here? To see if I’ll challenge you now? Sorry to disappoint you but we’re all going to have to wait until then. I’m not giving into your mind games, Mordred. Things will never change within my mind and you can’t forcibly change the way I perceive you. I flew off round in a large circle. You’re evil and corrupt, and you’ll never get a hold of me in any form. You know, as well as I do, that I could easily defeat you right here and now and if you don’t leave now I’m going to have to fight you to the ground.

   The pressure from his mind seemed to be chuckling and mockery. You’re not in the confines of Camelot now. I have complete strength in my actions here tonight. You’ll be surprised if you try to use magic on me. Each day, I learn more about you and him.

   That was it, I had had enough and this was my air, my region. Leave. Or receive what I have in mind for you to rethink. I have more ways of killing than using magic or brute strength alone.

   Delrand should have left the training to Merlin. You’ve picked up some bad habits of talking to me. Impatience is not a good virtue when it comes to using the mind.

   I left in a stroke of my wings. He screeched at me as he quickly pursued. I soared high and dived low in effortless ways to deter him from following. Heading back to Camelot and gliding over the fields below, I thought of new ways to add to my strenuous escape. On seeing the light from the many windows in the turrets, I stroked harder. I began to tire over the long distance. How had I gotten so far away in such a short time?

   Elara? Where are you? I was thrilled to hear Delrand’s voice then.

   I’m in the sky. I tried flying, like Oscar; but Mordred took the chance. I’m trying to lose him, though it isn’t easy.

   I’m on my way. The way he said this was strange and I couldn’t figure out why or in what way.

   Need help to get rid of me? I thought you said you could kill me now given half the chance, he taunted me.

   Right now I think I need all the help I can get, just to prevent you from stealing my secrets.

   Another bird of prey appeared in front of me. Knowing it was Delrand, I dived to avoid him. Climbing back up the air to him and breathing hard, I thought of something I could do to pay Mordred back for his coming here tonight. I unleashed a fire ball from mid-air and sent it streaking towards his glossy feathers. The sky was empty of his presence when the flames had disintegrated. Delrand flapped around to face me.

   Why did you endanger yourself like that? He sounded betrayed.

   I dropped my head but pushed my shoulders up. I didn’t realise he would turn up with so many of us nearby.

   He doesn’t see them as a threat. Only I really stand in the way of him getting to your mind. Let’s head back.

   I obediently followed him. I’m sorry, it just didn’t occur to me at all.

   Too late for regrets. I watched him fly below me. I knew he would try and blame himself for letting me stay alone for a few minutes; and I wasn’t going to let him take any of the guilt this time. Why did I let you go off alone?

   Don’t start that, I wanted to be alone for some time anyway. It was my choice to go out. I landed on the flagstones of the balcony floor. I changed back and walked off inside before he could say anything to my face. Tired and weary, I laid face down on the bed. I didn’t move my arms or legs, they hurt too much to test muscle movement. The mattress sank a little at my side and I felt him place a hand on my back. I kept my face sunk into the pillow.

   ‘Does it worry you that you can’t do much now?’

   I turned my head to face him so I could speak. ‘No, I need to feel some freedom every once in awhile. I hate being cooped up around here all day. Especially now I have so many things to be involved with.’

   His fingers pressed into my muscles and rubbed them in circles. ‘What many things?’

   ‘As time goes by I’m a useful help when it comes to determining positions and manoeuvres. You don’t expect my father to wait around while I do all the hard tasks.’

   ‘Physical assault will not gain us any ground against Mordred’s army. It is made of magicians, enchanters, warlocks and so on. All evil and all bent to his service. But their power is nothing compared to yours,’ he was very charming when he spoke like this to me.

   ‘But there’ll be so many of them.’

   ‘Yes, but your goal is to get to Mordred. Of course they’ll try to stop you, but you could crush them like ants with a blink of an eye by then.’

   ‘You don’t think I’m able to do that now?’

   ‘I wouldn’t know, I’m not you.’ He pushed my hair over one shoulder and stroked my neck gently.

   I turned over and sat up. I looked him in the eyes and combed my fingers through his dark, wavy hair. He closed his eyes at my touch and I moved my hand down to his shoulder. No matter how many times we disagreed or had petty arguments, how could I not love him? We were lucky to even be able to have any time alone at night without worry of being disturbed.

   He opened his eyes and they had turned the apple green that shone like emeralds under a shallow pool. I smiled up at him; even sitting down at the same level he was still taller than me. He noticed my grinning and tilted his head slightly. ‘What’s to laugh at?’

   ‘Do you know your eyes change shade like they have now?’

   ‘Something I can’t help when I feel a certain way.’ He closed his eyes and breathed in deeply. His eyes were back to their normal dark green when he opened them again. I pouted my lips, huffed a sigh and turned away. ‘Hey, don’t be like that. If you want to know, your eyes flash a blue tinge when you use magic.’

   ‘Really?’ I turned back to face him.

   He nodded. ‘I think it gives your power a good effect. Very malicious.’

   ‘How old are you?’ I asked out of now real reason.

   ‘Twenty, I told you that some time ago.’

   ‘When is your birthday then?’

   ‘The sixteenth of next month.’

   ‘Well, happy birthday for then.’ And I kissed him quickly on the lips.

   ‘A bit early but I’ll accept.’ He leaned a little closer and smiled crookedly back at me. I smiled again but what he meant by this gesture I couldn’t decipher. ‘You do know that we waste precious time when we just sit around.’

   ‘Precious time for doing what?’ I softly narrowed my eyes.

   ‘Practice of your magic.’

   ‘But I don’t... it’s too early for practicing.’

   ‘The sooner you become associated with your true power, the sooner we can work on our relationship. It won’t work side-by-side. When I know I don’t have to be with you all the time out of protectiveness, I’ll stay with you because I can love you more.’

   ‘More? Don’t you love me completely now?’ How was I meant to take that?

   ‘As much as I can during these days. Don’t think I can’t give you more than I can now, each day I’m with you I love you more than I did the day before. And maybe it is the same with you; all I need to know is that you love me back and I’ll gladly stay forever.’

   ‘I love you,’ I said as I gently stared him in the eyes. ‘If there’s any way I can convince you of that, I’d gladly do it without a second thought.’

   ‘You convinced me of that long ago; as long as I still have that bond with you, you need not worry about proving to me that it is still true. Also, is there anything that I can do to stop you from questioning my love to you?’

   I ran my fingers through his hair again and shuffled closer so all I had to do is whisper. ‘Just being with me almost every day. You also convinced me long ago, and we both know when that was.’

   ‘How could we forget?’ And with those last four words spoken he kissed me contently for the first time that day. I threw my arms around his neck with a little too much enthusiasm. He fell backwards off the bed, pulling me with him. He landed heavily on the wooden floor below and I landed on top of him. I pushed myself onto my hands to see him better.

   ‘You alright?’ I asked and my hair fell down the sides of my face. I shook my head so it flicked onto my back.

   His hands remained on my waste. ‘Fine. You?’

   ‘Fine.’ I tried biting my lower lip to suppress my laughing. Suddenly, he sprang up and kissed me on the cheek. My eyes widened and I gasped at his seemingly inviting gesture.

   He laughed at my surprised face. ‘I didn’t mean it that way. But if you want it to...’ He pulled my arms out from under me and my chest fell down onto his.

   ‘Delrand...’

   ‘Do you really think I would force you into this if I knew the limits? I understand you want to keep to the boundaries at this time.’

   I became nervous and fidgety. ‘I wish I could allow us to try but I can’t. That is one thing I am unwilling to give up while I remain unmarried.’

   ‘We can still compensate for that, at least.’

   ‘Compensate what? Us being unmarried or the fact that I won’t make love to you?’

   ‘The second one.’ He kissed my neck and along my jaw line. I moved my head so I could kiss him back. Our lips stayed locked together while he stroked my back and hair.

   I still needed to ask him an unanswered question that invaded my mind at that moment. I tensed my lips and pulled my head up so I was free to speak. ‘Will you ever ask me to marry you?’

   He turned his head sideways to face the balcony. I waited to see if he would answer; if he didn’t I thought it best not to force an answer out of him. After some time it seemed he was keeping it quiet.

   I pushed myself onto my knees, stood up and walked out onto the veranda. Did he want it to be a surprise if he was going to or was he unsure whether he would or should ask me? Coming up behind me, he held me around the waist. He moved my hair over my right shoulder and rested his right cheek against my left. I placed my right hand on his locked ones and my left palm against his left cheek. I closed my eyes and let him hold me there for as long as he wanted to. If I fell asleep in his arms I wouldn’t care, I knew he would stay without the need for me to ask.

   The night continued to pass by as it had done, from dusk until dawn, from the beginning of time. I wished this night could never end, only so I could be in arms forever and never fear of him letting go.