|BONUS CHAPTER: Lawrence's POV|

Sitting in a park, with the love of my life in my hands is the most beautiful thing that has ever happened to me. Dora was never shy. Growing up with three brothers, she was always bold. I know her inside out, still, she never fails to surprise me. What she did in the morning was yet a new side of her. And I being whipped by her, loved her each and every face. I was in my own heaven and bubble of happiness when I realised, I have not yet told her about the booking I have done for tonight's dinner.

I called her to tell her about it when instead of replying, she just hummed. Instantly I knew something was off. Dora had a habit of speaking as much as possible and humming meant she is tired. I touched her gently to ask her if she was alright, but my touch in itself told me the answer.

I immediately picked her up and she did not even protest. On my way back, I realised how much I was paining her. She was too selfless to think about herself. All she thinks about is me and how she can make me happy, not realising that it was just her being present that could make me happy. I was being selfish. I looked down at her to see her eyes closed. Her skin was turning red due to fever but her lips were turning bluish.

Afraid of losing her, as soon as I reached the inn, I called Marcus, my best man and told him to make arrangements for our return journey. I trusted him enough to know that he would manage everything. I reached our room and laid Dora on our bed. I called her maid of honour and told her to bring cold water and a cloth for her. Dora was already asleep, so I silently worked on bringing down her temperature. After an hour, her temperature finally cooled down to normal and I went to throw the water away.

When I returned, I saw her awake, looking around. I was leaning on the door behind her so she did not see me there. "What is happening?" She asked in general to nobody in particular.

"We are going back," I answered her. She finally looked back and saw me. "Your health is deteriorating. You need to visit the physician. I got a ticket for the evening for going back, so we are leaving today."

Dora looked down at her lap and I knew she was trying to hide her guilt. I knew she was again blaming herself for something which was not her fault at all, so I interrupted her "Do not."

"What?" she asked me waking up from her thoughts.

"I know what you are thinking. Do not." I told her, sitting beside her.

"I am sorry. I am such a nuisance." Dora whispered.

"You are not. You are perfect. You are everything I need. Stop it with the self-pity." I told her truthfully. This girl is all I have ever wanted. She is everything I like. And she is perfect the way she is. When she did not reply immediately, I knew something was off again. Her temperature was down now but her skin was still pale and her lips and nails still bluish. "Dora, we have a couple of hours before going. Sleep gorgeous." I told her pushing her back gently.

Dora however grabbed my arms and looked into my eyes. "I love you, Lawrence," she whispered. This statement was enough to make my heart start beating loudly. She was being scary.

"I know darling. I love you, too. But you are turning pale, you need to sleep now. I am right here." I told her sternly trying to keep the fear out of my voice.

"Do not leave me." She whispered.

"I am not going anywhere. I am here beautiful." I whispered back.

She then gently leaned toward me, placing her lips on mine. I realised what she wanted so I allowed her to lean. I wanted that kiss as much as she wanted. I wanted to feel her beneath me. I wanted to be sure that she was alright. But I cannot take advantage of her. So, I settled on giving her a single kiss.

I placed my lips on hers and started kissing her. However, she did not kiss me back. Gripping her shoulders, I pulled back to see her eyes closed.

"Dora..." I called her gently. She did not reply so I gently slapped her face. When she did not react again, fear gripped me hard. Shaking, I touched her wrist and tried to find a pulse. I looked at her face to see if she was breathing. But I found both the answers negative.

Frightened, I called her again "Dora, wake up sweetheart." She did not reply but I knew that she was just sleeping. She could not leave me. "Theodora. Wake up. You are not leaving me. Wake up gorgeous." I kept calling her, slapping her lightly, kissing her hands but she did not wake up.

Panickily, I called our servants. We needed a physician. Dora must have turned unconscious. She loved me too much to leave me alone. We did not even complete our honeymoon. We have to live a long life together. She was not dead. She could not be dead. We did not have enough time together. We need to have more time together.

I do not know what was happening around me as my love lay lifeless in my arms. Someone came and tried to take her away from me but I just swatted them away. She was mine. Only mine. She had told me that on our wedding day. She cannot be separated from me. She needs to live with me. I need to see her smile once again. I need to hear her say I love you to me again. I need to kiss her again and she needs to kiss me back. She needs to be with me for I cannot live without her. I want her back.

Two days later I was back in my home with Dora still in my arms. On the way there, we had made all the love possible but, on the way back, she just laid still. I called her many times. But she was never replied. Many people told me that she was no more, but I did not want to listen to them. I wanted to believe my heart. I wanted to believe she will never leave me.

I came back, picking her up bridal style and entering my house. I remembered how she giggled the last time we came in like that. As we entered my mother saw her. She already seemed to be aware of the situation. She ordered some men to prepare something as I lay with my beloved on our bed.

I was staring at her deeply that I did not hear the room door opening. "You alright?" I turned around to see Edward standing there.

"I am. Dora is not. She fell unconscious on our day of return and is not waking up." I told him.

"Lawrence, she is dead," he whispered under his breath but I heard him.

"No!" I shouted at him "My Dora is not dead. She cannot be dead. She told me we will come back home together. She promised me and my mother, that she will return. You are her brother. Do not say this about your own sister." I scolded him sounding like a heartbroken teenager. Maybe that was what I was.

He placed one hand on my shoulder and pressed it reassuringly "No one wants to believe it. But no one can change it. I am sorry Larry."

"Larry. That was what she called me. Only she. My world. It is broken without her. She cannot be dead. Please. She is not dead. She is not." I begged anyone who would listen, my voice cracking as I spoke. Tears were falling at an alarming rate and I made no effort to stop them. Edward hugged me tightly and we stayed like that, consoling each other as I finally accepted the harsh truth.

Her funeral was the worst part. Within a week she had her marriage and her funeral. Tears fell down as the realisation hit me.

Only a week ago, she took a vow in front of God, her family and friends to stay by my side but she failed to keep it. A week ago, I had promised her that I will keep her safe and happy, I told her I will stay with her in sickness and in health but I failed to keep it. I failed her. Tears were running down my eyes continuously for the last two days and I was amazed I still had them left.

After the funeral, I was sitting on the floor in my bedroom remembering everything about her. Her smile, her laugh, her tendency to call me Lawrence whenever she was angry at me. I remembered how her eyes had twinkled when I had called her Lady Haddington on her wedding day. I remembered how under a full moon she had told me about her sickness and how she expected me to leave her but she could not bring herself to accept that. I remember how she was shocked both the times I proposed to her. I remembered how she would react to my touches but was always eager for more. I remembered how she blushed every time I said something inappropriate, calling me her pervert. I was so much into her that I never realised how much lost I was without her.

I was weeping in my own memories when my mother entered my room.

"There is a delivery. You bought some books?" she asked me. I looked in her hand and more tears flowed from my eyes. I did not give a damn about respect. Everything was finished with her.

"They were supposed to be a gift..." I whispered. My mother seemed to understand and keeping the books on my nightstand came to sit beside me.

"I failed her mother. I promised her I would keep her safe and healthy. I promised her siblings I would keep her happy. I promised her parents that I will look after her. But I failed her. I failed everyone. I should not have married her. She told me not to, but I was selfish. She was right. She was safe with her family..." I cried in her hands.

"She might have been safe there but she was happy with you son. I have seen how you both completed each other. It is not your fault. No one blames you. Not I, not her parents and not her siblings. She loved you and She wanted you. Do not blame it on yourself. She would not want it." she was right. But it was difficult to believe. It was difficult to admit that I am all alone now. Difficult to believe and difficult to do what was right.

I stayed in her arms for some time not realising when I fell asleep. My dreams were yet again memories of her and I woke up with the nightmare of her lifeless body against mine as I remembered our last kiss.

Standing up and shaking my head, I made my way toward the bathroom. I washed my face and saw it in the mirror. My eyes held no emotion. There was no twinkle and no happiness in them. They were empty shells. They were just like me. Cold. I thought about Dora's serene eyeballs and mentally willed myself. I will live. I will live even if life is cruel enough to take my Dora away from me. I will live even if my heart lies six feet under the Earth, buried in her coffin. I will live even if my life is not worth living without her. I will live because my Dora would have wanted it for me. And I can do anything for my Theodora... 

This chapter is very close to my heart and brings tears to my eyes 😢. It was originally not planned but I got very close to Dora's story and could not help but think that it needed closure. Also, I have attached a video here 👇. The video is of the English translation of a Hindi song. This song just beautifully describes Larry's and Dora's life but is in Hindi which is actually my mother tongue. Just listen to it once and trust me, you will love the song 💖.

https://youtu.be/fKkauNs91FU

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I'm going to go cry in a corner now.