{ Chapter 5: Murder Family }

Danika watches Moxxie, who is holding a black and red crossbow in his hands. In front of him is a picture of a smiling family: a father, a mother, a baby and two children. His arms are shaking as the pointer hovers around the man's crotch area.

"Moxxie, stop shakin'! You're gonna shoot our only hellhound!" Millie scolded her husband.

Loona lies on a gray couch and holds up the family picture in one hand and her phone in the other. On the wall are drawings of Blitzo in a horse shape and a drawing of Robo Fizz with an arrow sticking out from it.

"Wow. I feel soooo loved here." Loona said sarcastically, deadpanned.

"Just take a deep breath," Millie said, inhaling. "and let it out!"

"But... it's a family! Under what circumstances would we ever need to kill a human family?" Moxxie questioned.

"I mean, if that's what the client wants." Millie said.

"Maybe like a shitty dad. Or a mob family." Moxxie start speaking with a stereotypical Italian accent. "That's understandable." he then speaks normally. "But to eradicate an entire innocent—seemingly, in this instance—upper middle class family bloodline?"

Loona looks at the picture as she thinks for a moment.

"Hey! You don't know they're innocent!"

She points to the boy in the picture.

"This kid probably sets dogs on fire," she points to the girl. "maybe this girl gets off to bullying Australian kids online," then points to the father. "and this guy... This guy definitely watches."

"She is right. Everybody, even humans, has sinister secrets. In the same way, the child's egotistical parents constantly force them to follow their advantage by having her clean and take care of other things like a maid." With a glimpse at her own story, Danika said.

"Exactly! Humans are full of secret nasties. It's why so many of them end up here." Millie smiled, assuring him.

Danika looked aside upon hearing that because she, too, has a secret—and it has nothing to do with her parents.

"But—" Moxxie started.

"Guilty and innocent aren't our business, Mox." Millie said, cupping Moxxie's cheeks as she shakes them. "Killin' who we're paid to is our business. Shoot the target."

She then kisses him. Moxxie aims his crossbow.

"I just think it's a bit excessive, and we could be a bit more selective, is all."

Blitz barges into the room followed by Mrs. Mayberry.

"Guys! I want you to meet—"

A startled Moxxie accidentally fires his arrow and it ricochets around the room. Millie jumps into Moxxie's arms as the arrow hits a computer. The arrow then flies and creates a hole in the family picture that a stunned Loona is holding. The arrow flies towards Danika, who backflips away from it as it hits the bottom of a tank with eels and the tank starts to wobble dangerously. The arrow flies toward Mrs. Mayberry, but Blitzo catches it with one hand.

"...our newest client!" he finished the introduction.

The eel tank falls down. Glass and water spill on the floor. The eels fall out and bursts into electricity, setting the room on fire.

"Damn it, Moxxie! I just bought those eels!" Blitz angrily shouted.

Outside the building, imp firefighters carry the eels away and head into a red fire truck. Mrs. Mayberry drives off in a yellow taxi cab as Blitzo waves goodbye.

"Byyyyye! And, don't worry, we'll get that skank in less than twenty-four hours or your first kill is freee!"

Blitz waves as the car drives away.

"When did we start implementing that deal?" Moxxie questioned.

Blitz turns with a glare to Moxxie.

"When you set fire to my office in front of a..." he said before he start yelling. "CLIENT, YOU FUCKIN' DICK SHIT!!"

Blitz grabs Moxxie's face and pushes him away.

"Now, someone PLEASE tell me that fancy book is still intact!"

A nearby billboard with Blitz's face on it reads with misspellings: "Goat an asshole in the living worlds!? Come to I Am Pee!!??! Make sure you put this sign up on the rite side. Don't fuck this up. Also payment may take a couple of weeks because it cums in the mail. –Speech to text- -Blitzo-".

Loona types on her phone and looks at her.

"You mean... our only ticket to the other side?"

Danika pops up next to Loona and pulls out the grimoire.

"Got it. Safe and sound." she said.

Blitz smiles over to the two.

"And that's why you two are my favorites, Loonie and Dan." he said in a baby talk voice. "You get a tweat, now!"

Blitz holds up a dog biscuit to them.

"Ew. Stop." Loona said in disgust.

"No thanks..." Danika shook her head, looking disgusted.

Blitz throws the treat into the air and catches it with his tongue, like a frog. He pulls it into his mouth and chews. Loona smacks the book close.

"You're so gross!" Loona groaned.

"Gosh, really?!" Danika groaned.

Millie draws a pentagram with chalk on the wall. It glows red and creates a portal to the human world.

"Awwww, stop it. I get enough of that from my therapist." Blitz waved off.

Loona rolls her eyes and leaves not before nodding to Danika for good luck. Danika smiles and nods back. Blitz puts his hand on Moxxie's face, who struggles to walk to Millie.

"Now, let's go lick some ass!" he stated.

Hearing that made Danika even more grossed out. Luckily, Millie corrected him.

"The expression is "kick some ass"... Blitz."

Millie snaps her fingers at Blitzo as she walks through the portal.

"Mine's better."

Blitzo walks through the portal and Danika follows after him.

"Aww, fuuuck..." Moxxie sighed, coming through last.

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Moxxie walks through the portal. All three imps and an owl demon stand in front of a small red house by the lake as the sun sets. Blitz and Moxxie lean against the side of the house, rising from bushes. Blitz stands up and peers into the window.

"That's gotta be her." Blitz chuckled darkly. "This is too easy. Moxxie, do you want this one?"

Moxxie looks pleasantly surprised.

"Me?"

"Yeaaaah, this one's simple enough for you to handle."

Moxxie stands up and peers through the window. His faces falls as he looks at the family having dinner.

"It's just a happy mother who just got out of the hospital."

Martha and Ralphie affectionately rub each other's noses. Martha holds a dinner platter in her hand. Moxxie hesitates at the window.

"You snooze, you lose, Mox! Danika, you got this." Blitz said, seeing his hesitation.

"On it." Danika said, taking the rifle from Blitz.

Martha's face is seen in a reflector, her doe eyes wide and blinking innocently. Danika's eyes narrows at seeing how happy the family looked to which something she wishes she had. But they're just as messed up as her parents are.

"Lights out, bitch." she said.

"Wait... Are we actually killing a family?!" Moxxie questioned in shock.

"No, don't be a puss. We're just killing a mother." Blitz assured him.

Danika positions the rifle.

"We're ruining a family!" he finished.

Rifle clicks as she readies her shot.

"But... Ho- Hold on, hold on! Let's just think about it."

Moxxie lifts up Danika's gun as she fires. The bullet hits a glass mirror inside the house. All four family members gasp in fear.

"What was that, Ralphie?" Martha asked worriedly.

Ralphie shakes his head.

"I dunno, Martha! But, whatever it is..."

Grins evilly as he stands up holding a rifle in his hands.

"...they're gonna be tomorrow night's dinner!"

Martha sets the platter on the table and pulls out another rifle. She drinks a glass of wine and smashes it onto the floor.

"Alright, kids! Guns out!"

The boy pulls out a small gun from his beaver-skin hat. The girl pulls out another rifle. All of them have evil grins of sharp teeth.

"Looks like we got some rabbits to catch, young'uns!" Ralphie chuckled darkly.

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"Moxxie! Why did you do that?!" Danika growled in anger.

Blitz fumes in anger.

"Yeah! What the fuck was that, Moxxie?!"

Moxxie wheezes anxiously, eye twitching. He lets out a croak with his snake-like tongue out. He then falls to his knees, hands over his face.

"I'm sorry. They just seemed so wholesome and happy."

Tears fall from Moxxie's eyes as he takes more breaths.

"I panicked!"

Blitz facepalms.

"Oh, who the fuck is innocent, Moxxie?! From the moment of birth, you're already a parasite leeching off your momma's tits!"

Blitz leans in and pokes Moxxie's head.

"Get the FUCK over yourself, you baby dick prune!"

A blast shoots through the wall and hits Blitz in the arm, black blood flying out.

"Blitz!!" Danika gasped in horror.

"AAAAH! A new hole! SCATTER!"

Blitz, Danika, and Millie flee the scene and Moxxie hides in the bushes. Another hole appears and part of the wall explodes. Ralphie and Martha grin and leap through the large hole with guns drawn. Moxxie peers out from the bushes and rapidly looks around. A child's hand grabs Moxxie by his tail and he yelps.

Ralphie fires at Millie who flips backwards and dives into the lake.

"Where'd you go, little critter?! Y'all can't hide long from me!"

Millie is seen with her head above the water under the dock. A knife is in her mouth. Millie breaks through the dock and lands on it, with her knife and a grin. Ralphie swings a glass bottle and Millie runs behind him out of the way. Millie jumps up in the air, knife in both hands. Ralphie swings his bottle upwards, knocking Millie in the head. She cries out and falls to the ground. She struggles to stand, but collapses onto the dock. Her eyes twitch. Ralphie smiles evilly down at her as the cloudy sky spirals red.

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Four gunshots ringing out in the woods. Blitz and Danika dashing through a bush. Martha's evil laughter follows as Blitz and Danika runs through the forest. They slide down a hill and catch their breath at the bottom.

"I know you're hurtin', little devil!" Martha called in a sing-song voice.

Blitz takes deep breaths as he leans against a tree. Danika gets to the job and starts cleaning his wound on his arm, much to his appreciation. Blitz's eyes go wide as he covers his mouth while Danika kept herself quiet while aiding his arm. A silhouette of Martha is shown walking through the woods.

"I promise, that I can make that pain go real quick! Just come let Mama Martha put a bullet in your pretty little skull!"

Blitz sighs in relief as Danika finishes bandaging his arm before his phone lets out a yelling ringtone. Blitz pulls out the yellow cell phone and it flips through the air. The phone has "GFY" written on it with a laughing devil emoji on it. Danika stares at him in disbelief.

"Dammit!" he cursed.

Blitz tries to grab hold of the phone eventually doing so, then he holds it to his ear.

"Stolas! This is a really bad time." he hissed.

"Dad?" Danika said in surprise.

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Stolas is shown in his palace relaxing in a bathtub. There are candles with blue flames around the tub. The floor has glowing astrological symbols on it. The curtains look like the starry night sky. Glowing constellations float around the room. Stolas holds an old rotary phone to his ear, in the shape of sunflowers.

"Mmmmm, when isn't it a bad time, Blitzy?"

"What is it?!" Blitz asked, frustrated.

"I've been meaning to follow up on our last little conversation regarding my grimoire?"

Blitz's angry face appears in a bubble.

"What did you just call me?!"

Stolas pops the bubble with his finger.

"My book, Blitzy. The book I was given to do my job? That I have allowed you to use to do yours?"

Blitz looks scared as a rifle clicks. Danika feels herself getting a cold sweatdrop at the life and death situation as she quietly pulls out her gun. A bullet flies through the tree where Blitz and Danika were moments before. A shadow of Martha with red eyes and mouth appears through the hole.

"I can HEAR you, darlin'!"

"Shhhit!" Blitz cursed.

Danika takes his uninjured arm and the two starts running.

"Anywhooo, I have been thinking. You know, I have been... permitting you to access the mortal realm less than... legally for quite some time now, but I do need it back to fulfill my duties. I was thinking, what if we worked out some kind of exchange? Favors for favors?" Stolas explained with a hint of suggestion.

Stolas runs his finger on the edge of the tub. He makes walking motions with his fingers as they begin to glow red.

Back to Blitz and Danika running through the woods. A bullet hits a tree and Blitz and Danika duck behind another one.

"Doesn't that sound..." Stolas then speaks in a seductive voice. "enticing?"

"You gotta stop using your fancy ass rich people talk, okay? We're trying to concentrate on not getting fucked in our A!"

Sensing something, Danika pushes Blitz down as a bullet hits the tree that they're hiding behind.

"Then, let me keep it simple: Once a month, on the full moon, you return the book to me, followed by a night of..."

Stolas' eyes glow red and he lowers himself into the water with a lustful look.

"...paaassionate fornication~"

Stolas leans slightly over the edge.

"Aaand you get to keep it all the rest of the time, hmm? Sound fair, my little Imp?"

"Fine! Whatever!" Blitz groaned, pinching the bridge of his forehead.

"Ohhh, Blitz! I'm so excited! I cannot wait to feel your slimy (bleeped) inside of my (bleeped). To (bleeped) the—"

Blitz cringes and closes his eyes as Stolas rambles on about his lust for Blitz. Even Danika is uncomfortable as she starts to put two and two together.

"Did you have sex with my dad?!"she questioned.

Blitz turns to her in shock.

"Stolas is your fucking dad?!!"

"Adopted daughter of his, actually."

"Seriously?!"

Blitz sees something and pushes Danika into the bushes before he drops his phone as he is pinned to the tree by the butt of Martha's gun. Stolas continues talking on the phone through censored bleeps.

"Gotcha!" Martha said, grinning evilly at him. "So, you're a little devil, huh? Come to drag me and my kin to Hell? Well... NOT TODAY, SATAN!"

She presses the gun harder into Blitz.

"Gonna send y'all back where ya came from!"

Danika watches through the bushes with worry as Martha takes Blitz away.

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The scene shifts to Moxxie, who struggles to free himself from the rope, his hands tied behind his back. He looks up and gasps as he sees fires being lit from outside. A hangman's noose hangs from the wall.

"Millie!" he said with worry.

Both kids stare at Moxxie with wide evil grins. Moxxie grunts and struggles again. He notices the girl pull out a sharp knife. He looks at the blade and then glares with determination. The girl raises the knife but Moxxie pushes the chair backwards, knocking her to the ground. He frees himself with the knife. A silhouette of Moxxie appears as he breaks through the window, holding his gun. A "Live, Laugh, Love," sign hangs from inside the room. He races outside through the forest, where red symbols hang from tree branches. There are torches in rows and tents. A full moon appears in the sky. Moxxie sees Danika running through the same path he's in and catches up to her. Danika notices him and nods, which he nods back.

Meanwhile, Millie and Blitz are tied to a stake decorated with spikes at the top. Ralphie laughs as he pours gasoline on the ground under their feet. Nearby, a grinning Martha holds a torch in her left hand.

"Danika had that fucking shot. God dammit, Moxxie!" Blitz sighed.

Martha wears skull earrings, jeans and a low-cut shirt with polka dots. Her eyes are red and her hair is thick and blonde.

"Satan! We return your FILTHY creatures back to the pits of Hell!"

Martha rises her torch as Blitz and Millie struggle to free themselves.

"May the root of evil remain honored as we continue thy WORK!"

Martha grunts as she tosses the torch to the ground, where it lands under Blitz and Millie. Evil laughter follows. The flames rise up around Blitz and Millie, but they remain unharmed.

"Yeah, that's not exactly how it works, lady. Sorry, your fire doesn't really hurt us, but, I mean, I could fake it if that'll get your dick hard." Blitz stated as he and Millie smirk.

Martha stares confused.

"Oh. Shit." she said.

Martha rolls her eyes.

"Well... I'll just shoot you in your smart-ass mouth!"

She grins and pulls out her rifle.

"That would be more effective."

Millie turns to him angrily.

"Blitz!"

Martha laughs evilly again as she aims her rifle at the imps. Both imps close their eyes and flinch. Martha then yelps as a gunshot is heard. Martha's eye flies from her socket as well as her chest being shot as a hole is made and she collapses to the ground. Moxxie and Danika are shown holding their gun.

"Moxxie! Danika!" Millie smiled to see them.

Moxxie and Danika runs over and unties the rope, freeing Blitz and Millie.

"You're not gettin' your goddamn paycheck for this one, Mox! Except you, Danika."

Danika catches Blitz as soon as he falls down and supports him. Moxxie and Millie smile at each other and embrace. They both move their heads. Ralphie trips backwards on Martha's body before fleeing the scene. Danika smiles at the couple, not minding Ralphie fleeing from them, instead turning to her boss with concern.

"You alright, Blitz? How's your arm?" she asked.

"I'm fine. Thanks. No thanks to you, Moxxie."

Moxxie walks over to Blitz.

"I'm sorry, sir. I compromised our objective and put us in harm's way. It won't happen again. I promise."

Blitz pulls Moxxie into a hug.

"Apology accepted." he then speaks in a low voice. "But, if you ever pull a stunt like this agaaaaain, I will fuck you and your wife."

Blitz lets go as Moxxie looks fearfully. Millie raises her arms in a cheer.

"Alrighty! Job well done! Now let's get off."

Blitz pulls a gray and black horse toy from his chest. He puts it back and retrieves his cell phone.

"Ehhhh, yeah. Give me a moment. I need to get something I left at the house." Moxxie said.

"Okay, fine. But, hurry up."

Blitz speaks loudly into the phone.

"Loonaaaa! We're ready to come home, dear!"

Moxxie runs through the woods with a determined look on his face. Stolas has continued to rave over the phone about his plans for Blitz.

"... (bleeped) use while you and I and (bleeped) and jelly sandwiches all night...!"

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Danika waits for a moment, wondering what's taking Moxxie so long until he finally arrived at the portal with her, Blitz, and Moxxie at night.

"There he is. Have a good wank-off session, Moxxie?" Blitz asked.

"Excuse me?" Moxxie raised his eyebrow.

"Look, I don't care where you cum in the living world. Just come to your job on time, alright?"

Blitzo pokes Moxxie several times for emphasis.

"See you at the office!"

Blitzo goes through the portal. Millie places her hand on Moxxie's cheek.

"You doing okay, sweetie?" she asked.

"Better now, honey. I think I just needed a minute to process." Moxxie smiled.

Millie touches Moxxie's chest.

"You have a goooood heart, honey."

Millie playfully pinches Moxxie's nose.

"Just a fuzzy head!"

Millie kisses Moxxie and Moxxie smiles lovingly. Millie walks through the portal.

"She's right though. You did great. But I have to agree with Blitz. Just because the family look innocent and happy, not everything is what it seems. Just me, I've been there." Danika said, giving him a pat on the shoulder.

"I know. Thanks, Danika."

She nods and walks through the portal. Moxxie turns around and notices two police cars and a helicopter outside the house.

"We got em', boys!"

A helicopter fires a missile through the roof and the house explodes in a massive inferno. Something hits Moxxie in the head. He looks down to see what is left of the teddy bear head. He looks stunned as Blitz grabs his neck and pulls him through the portal.

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In the headquarters, Mayberry, the imps, and the owl demon celebrating their victory. A white banner reads "Killed the Bitch" in red letters. Loona, Danika, and Mrs. Mayberry are holding pieces of cake on their plates. "We did it! :)" is written on the cake in light blue icing. Blitz has his arm in a sling. Everyone is wearing party hats. Everyone laughs and cheers except Moxxie, who sits with a distressed look on his face.

"Ahhh, did you see my little Mox-Mox?!" Millie asked excitedly.

"Yaaay!" Mrs. Mayberry cheered.

"Ohhhh, yeah!" Blitz cheered.

Millie hugs Moxxie.

"We did it! Oh, Moxxie!"

"Well, here's to another mission accomplished! And Moxxie finally learned not to fuck up." Blitz stated.

Millie rubs Moxxie's head.

"And killin' people isn't that big of a deal if they try to kill you back!"

"That's messed up. But, I paid for it!" Mrs. Mayberry said, shrugging.

Everyone except Moxxie laughs. Blitzo raises a fist.

"Yeah, fuck that family!"

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