"So did you girls have fun?" Nick asked like a father asking his children's about their school trip. We left Alderley Edge an hour after the countdown, drove past Pendleton Way heading to my flat.

"One of the best I've had. Thank you," I replied briskly, not planning to share with Nick about the rest.

"Don't mention it," he murmured wearily.

"And thank you for standing up to me," I blurted.

"I wasn't, really," he answered honestly. "I was just teaching him some manners. It's his job."

"He had too much to drink maybe," I suggested.

"Probably," he mouthed.

Then, an awkward silence filled within the two doors of his 675LT Spider, so silent that even the audio system was left idle. The silence gave me a second thought to Milla's earlier advice. What she said was plausible, Nick can be vicious and tormenting but his heart is at the right place. But where was his heart when he put a bullet in his victims' head? Or what was in his mind when he transported the illegal commodities around for innocent consumers' use? If Nick's a kind hearted person he claimed to be, he has to switch to a more credible job.

"So, what's your new year's resolution?" I asked, breaking the silence.

"Same like every year, ensuring that I sustain," he sighed. "Yours?"

"Making sure that we sustain," I responded.

He chuckled at my answer. "That's a very thoughtful resolution."

"I learned from the experts. From you," I said grinning at him.

"How am I an expert to this?"

"You put people first before you, regardless," I began. "Well, at least people like me or Milla. And I bet there are more of us that you have fight for because you're a caring person at core. But I sense that something had suppressed you from becoming who you really are."

"I respectfully disagree," he said politely. "I am being me but there are a whole lot of me that I haven't disclosed."

"But a person's present driven by his or her past, ain't it?"

"I don't like where we're going from here," his relaxed face tensed again.

"Come on, we all are different growing up," I assured. "Like me for instance. I was clingy, especially to my mom and Zahidi. What were you like growing up? Were you clingy?"

"What are you getting out of this?" his calm tone turned cagey.

"Curiosity," I answered, oblivious to his reaction. "I need to get to know you better so that I could work on to accomplish my resolution."

"The only resolution you need right now is to stay out of my private life and mind your own," he retorted.

"But you will open up to me eventually, at least for the sake of my job," I argued.

"Your job is to manage my current needs sufficiently," he said in agitation. "You don't need to dig up my past for it."

"Managing your wellness and wellbeing is part of my job, ain't it?"

"Now you're just swindling," he muttered under his heavy breath. "If you don't know to handle the fire, don't flick the lighter."

"You can't keep those pain inside, it'll eat you alive," I said out of concern.

"It has already been gorging me as we speak," he raised his voice. "Now, if you don't want me to literally throw you out on the streets, I suggest you should stop talking."

So it goes, another set of silence emitting between us as we approached Kingsway. He revved up the engine as he pressed the clutch pedal to switch gears. The car suddenly throttled to a high speed, causing an abrupt pressure penetrating my chest, like I couldn't hardly breathe. He was either too knackered with this evening's encounter or he just wants to send me home quickly.

"I just want to help you out," I clarified.

"You're still talking," he cautioned.

"You know as a friend you are a total daft apeth."

"I am not your friend. I can never be your friend," he said, controlling his anger.

"Well, I made friends with my previous bosses just fine," I objected.

"Again, you are comparing me to someone else!" he bellowed. "What did I tell you about differences, Zahida Jafri?"

Him addressing me in full name would usually meant that he's extremely agitated with me and things are about to get nasty if I don't stop. But I went on, ignoring his feelings.

"The point is we can be friends if you set aside your differences. I just want to help you," I pushed further.

"I don't need help," he heaved an angry sigh. "Friendship needs years of mutual care and respect which I have no patience for. Mostly they don't last long."

"Nick, you're just generalising every friendship to be bad."

"I said mostly they are. So, I don't want to go there," he repeated.

"Hey, I get it. You're scared. You have trust issues," I said in my utmost calm manner. "I know because I'm just like you, I get scared sometimes. Especially, when I have no parents to support me. So, let me help you out the way you have helped me. If my family were around, they would agree with me on this. I'm sure your mom would want the same."

"Don't fuckin' talk to me about my mother!" he raged out of control, pounding his fist against the steering wheel to my surprise. Suddenly, he swerved the car to the kerb and veered left and right like a mad man before taking the car to an abrupt stop which caused me to jerk forward.

"Get out!" he yelled.

"What's that for?"

"It's for fuckin' round with my boundaries. Now, get out!"

"It's freezing out here. Where should I go?"

"You can engorge yourself for all I care."

I pulled the handle and swung the door upwards before getting myself out. As I pushed the door close, the car swiftly drove off and disappeared into darkness. If you ask whether I regret saying what I just said, no, I wasn't. I just regret saying them at the wrong time, causing me to walk home all the way from Kingsway for an hour journey, under a cold single digit, presumably negative temperature. And just when you thought it can't get any better, a flurry of snow floating around me swirling like a swarm of angry bees reaching to the ground causing my nose to twitch.

That's what happens when you ask someone who has social awkward issuesto talk people through. Not only they messed up the entire conversation andtrust, they got home with an aching feet and a running nose.