Growing up with two dads was definitely different.

It wasn't wrong, and growing up with having Brendon and Ryan as my dads was definitely the best thing to happen in my life.

I love them so much. I also love my older sister: Faze probably more than I love myself.

She's now fifteen. And I'm eleven.

Faze grew up quickly and within about two years of her being here she went through three years of severe depression.

For my dad: Ryan he has really bad anxiety. And with her like that made him very stressed all the time. And now that I'm old enough for them to talk to me about self harm. I know he's picked it back up.

I was diagnosed with anxiety before I even went to kindergarten. I ended up having so many panic attacks and problems breathing during them that I was able to skip kindergarten.

I am now in fifth grade, questioning my sexuality.

I have an inhaler now for my panic attacks. I have them less often now but there isn't really a cure for anxiety.

I've never self harmed. My dad: Ryan has been very good at keeping me away from that kind of thing.

He's showed me his scars and told me I should never do it. Because I'll regret it.

I still bare a scar above my eyebrow from falling on my scooter when I was only two.

A girl once told me I looked 'hot' with the scar above my eyebrow. I also suffered getting the scar in just the right spot to where the hair in part of my eyebrow never grew back.

However, I did like her. So I felt really cool after that.

Right, back to me questioning my sexuality. Well I haven't even talked to my dads about it.

And I don't really feel like coming out of the closet quite yet. And I'm not even sure what I am yet.

I've liked girls, and I've liked boys.

I'm pretty sure my dads had a conversation with me about this. But I was young I don't remember that.

Right now I have a crush on this boy: Elliott. Being in fifth grade I don't want to come out.

And I'm not even sure what I am. Am I gay? Am I straight? Or somewhere in between.

I wish I someone understood what I was going through.

•-•
A/N
Heyyy new book!!

So this is how everything in clays life is gonna play out

However it's not gonna be super long and not super short I really like the idea of Clay growing up and yeahhh

And (clearly) I'm not ready to let go of those characters of my first fanfic

Also SOFIA IS ASKING HER CRUSH OUT TOMORROW AND WE FOUND OUT HE LIKES HER AND OMG IM SO HAPPY :)))

Also my crush is the advisory leader and my job is to clean the computer cart (my advisor is the latin teacher so we're in the latin room and the computer cart is a mess) and he's gonna make me clean it then mess it up again (yay) *rolls eyes*

Also the script in one of my plays is terrible.

Also I have to have my lines memorized by Friday and I'm stressing out ughhhhhh

So I hope y'all like the idea of this or like it :)
Anyways

~enjoy killjoys~