Cyno, Tighnari, Kaveh and Alhaitham always hang out every weekend, drinking a minor amount of alcohol while playing a famed card game called Genius Invocation TCG. Normally, Kaveh would either rage or get too drunk and Alhaitham would have to bring Kaveh home, leaving the forest ranger and general with a half-completed game, sitting awkwardly before Cyno decides to crack a joke. Tighnari's reaction to this is tugging his ears and leaving in a hurry-- it's quite humorous, actually.

But today, Cyno sits in the wooden chair he always claims for his own, the one with a city view—albeit not the best view—but Cyno likes to know if trouble may come their way, after all, he's the most powerful fighter of them all (a self-proclaimed statement) and will defend his friends the best he can. Tighnari always sits to his right, leaving Kaveh to his left, and Alhaitham is forced next to his roommate and Tighnari.

On the circular table, the normal flowers put on the table are removed, possibly because the group is playing a card game and need to reach over the table, or maybe because it is the season where Sumerian Roses start to welt, as the summers are too hot for the poor purple flower.

Cyno hums and views the scene beneath his gaze. Alhaitham has his deck of Keqing, Nahida and Sangonomiya Kokomi out, and he's shuffling his blue deck with perfect form. On the other hand, Tighnari is trying to decide to fight with his Electro Charge deck or with his Overload deck, all his green-backed cards are stacked uncharacteristically in a haphazard pile to his right, left untouched. Haha, get it? To his right, left untouched? When it was in Tighnari's right, I said left, but not the 'left or right' left, but the past tense of leaving, making the two antonyms right next to each other with no grammatical errors.

"Cyno you better have not made a joke already," The overly dramatic blonde says upon entry.

"Only one in my head, would you like to hear it?" Cyno asks absentmindedly, though he knows the answer.

"Hell no," Kaveh says flatly, taking out his deck in a single swoop, "I'm surprised you haven't set up your deck yet, you're normally the first one here."

"I appreciate the small talk, but your voice is annoying," Alhaitham states.

"Wow, how kind," Kaveh remarks sarcastically.

"How about I make small talk?" Tighnari offers, gently shuffling his deck, "Today Collei has passed the Forest Ranger Gliding Tests, the gliding coach was surprised to see Collei succeed so quickly– I've never seen her so happy."

"Woo! Go Collei! She deserves every bit of happiness she gets," Kaveh cheers.

"How did she get better at gliding? She was struggling with balance the last time I visited," Cyno points out.

"Ah, well, Collei's Mondstadt friend is one of the best gliders in Mondstadt, if not the entirety of Teyvat. They spent some time together as we visited Albedo and Sucrose training and having fun," Tighnari explains.

"I see," Cyno finally takes out his own deck, feeling a bit wary.

TCG hasn't felt the same. It's gotten a bit... repetitive. It's a repetition of roll, attack, switch characters, attack, heal, with little variety. Sure, there are many characters to choose from, and Kaveh had just given him the special card he got from winning that tournament two months ago. It's been extremely helpful in his playstyle (he's more of an 'attack attack before they can kill me', and forgets to heal) by a lot. The card kept him alive enough to beat Alhaitham for the first time in a while.

While he had been cheerful at such a feat, he felt like the happy, confident emotions were wearing down. Don't get him wrong, TCG is a lot better than Go Fischl, but it has gotten a bit... boring. The general is nervous to say that. What if the others didn't like that he's bored of the game? All of Cyno's good friends would know he doesn't like their favorite game, and he knows what that feels like (he tried to play with some lower rank associates, but they shot him down) so he'd rather not.

"Hey Cyno, are you going to try the same strategy as last time?" Kaveh asks contentally.

"No..." Cyno says, deep in thought.

"Really!? But it beat Alhaitham!" Kaveh leans forward with his exclamation, hair bouncing forward.

"I am kind of feeling that.." Cyno pauses, putting his words together, "Invocation TCG is getting rather repetitive."

Everyone pauses, Kaveh is mid shuffle and his grip on his cards loosen, letting them fall to the floor. Even he doesn't curse nor make a snarky response about his luck or Alhaitham breathing too loudly, he just, sits there.

...

"You're finally bored of TCG!?" The Forest Ranger exclaimed.

Cyno nodded, surprised at the positive(?) reaction, along with Kaveh's gleeful expression and Alhaitham's normal, non-expressive one.

"Praise the gods! I thought we'd be playing it for another year until you'd suggest moving on. The three of us have been bored of the game for a while, but you've always been so excited about it we made a group decision to keep playing," Kaveh explains.

"So all of you have been bored of TCG," Cyno notes.

"Mhm," Kaveh agrees.

"But you continued for me...?" Cyno can't believe he doubted his friends accepting his newfound boredom of the game, they really are good friends.

"Now, now, don't get emotional," Tighnari remarks sarcastically.

"I'm not, merely thinking of... what we're going to do now with our meetings?" Cyno questions.

"Nice save," Tighnari says, then thinks for a moment, "what do we do?"

"Let's find a new game," Kaveh suggests.

"For once an intellectual idea," Alhaitham says, not making eye contact to further annoy the blonde.

"SHUT UP!" Kaveh shouts.

"Only because I don't want to talk," The sage says.

"Wait, I think that finding a game makes sense, but what game?" Cyno wonders aloud.

The group thinks for a moment.

"I'll find one everyone will love and bring it next weekend!" Kaveh exclaims.

"Like you could ever find a good game," Alhaitham muttered.

"SHUT. UP." Kaveh shouts.

--

The next weekend, Kaveh was the second to arrive—Alhaitham remaining the first to reserve his favorite chair—holding a long black box in his hands.

"This is what I brought and you better appreciate it," Kaveh huffs to Alhaitham, setting the game down on the table.

When Cyno and Tighnari arrive in a few minutes, and Kaveh presents his game smugly, and the Mahamatra looks delighted, Tighnari sighs; he's played before with a few people... it didn't end well.

"How does the game work?" Cyno asks innocently.

"Well it's called Cards Against Teyvat, similar to Apples to Apples, or Sunsettia to Sunsettia depending where you're from, but more grown up. So you grab a black card and read it aloud– here, we'll do an example round!" Kaveh happily grabs two black cards from the box.

"There are two types of black cards, in this one, it says "What's that sound?" The white cards are for answering the question. This other card says "___ was so quiet I fell asleep in class", and white cards are for filling in the blank. Grammar doesn't always make sense, but that's just how life works," Kaveh says.

Kaveh, realizing the others need decks to actually play, takes a lump of white cards and deals everyone 7 cards before he puts one of the black cards back into the hoard of black cards.

"Because this is a practice round so Cyno and Alhaitham can understand the game, flip all your white cards so I can suggest the best ones. So you have the obvious answer, if the question is "___ was so quiet I fell asleep in class" you can have several answers; 'The teacher,'" Kaveh points to a card Cyno has "is the logical answer."

Kaveh searches for another card, then points to Alhaitham's card.

""The highschool sweethearts" is a more funny card," Kaveh points to another of Alhaitham's card, and "Making out with my best friends" is really funny, because it doesn't make sense. So we've got Logical, Funny, and Unlogical; choose wisely for each person. Does that make sense?"

"Yes, it sounds interesting," Cyno says.

The four start drawing a new deck, Kaveh sadly getting many character cards ("they aren't funny in any scenario!"), Alhaitham got a few cards that could be used in a dirty minded scenario, Cyno and Tighnari got decent cards with 1 or 2 really good ones, though they measure 'good' quite differently.

"Left of the dealer goes first," Tighnari says.

"What dealer," Alhaitham states.

"Me," Tighnari says, drawing a black card before any protest about 'being fair'.

"What! That's not fair!" Kaveh calls out.

"It says "I wanted to go to Main Campus, but because of ___ I am stuck in a janitor's closet", I'd say for me... do sarcastic cards or funny cards," Tighnari places the black card in the middle of the table for everyone to see.

"Let's see how this first round goes," Cyno announces.

It took almost a minute for everyone to put down a white card face-down, then Tighnari shuffled them so he wouldn't know who put what card down (he definitely has a favorite friend and would choose accordingly).

"So I just read the black card, but fill in the blank with what the white card says?" Tighnari asks.

"Mhm, didn't you say you played this before?" Kaveh asks.

"I didn't say it, but yes, and there are many different versions of this game, Kaveh. I thought you'd know that because it's similar to varying architecture in different countries," Tighnari teases.

"What?! Those aren't even close at all!" Kaveh screeches.

"Well, the base of it is. Don't mind the little details," Tighnari waves it off.

"Little details are my THING!" Kaveh points to himself to emphasize.

"Really? I never knew," Is the sarcastic remark.

Kaveh sighs, when Tighnari suddenly goes red.

"KAVEH!" He calls out, "Why'd you have to do a dirty joke right away!?"

"What? It wasn't even that bad," Kaveh huffs.

"Read it aloud," Alhaitham says.

""I wanted to go to Main Campus, but because of Scribe Alhaitham's Ass, I am stuck in a janitor's closet"," Tighnari reads, sighing.

"See! It's not that bad! Only if you think about it!" Kaveh defends.

"Think about it- Oh my archons," Cyno's eyes are wide open with surprise. "I knew it."

"KNEW WHAT!?" Kaveh shouts.

"You and Alhaitham," Cyno says, calm again.

"W-what!? No! We are roommates, that's all!" Kaveh blushes. "It's literally just a funny card, get off my ass!"

Kaveh turns to look at Alhaitham for help, but he is also blushing. HE CAN BLUSH!?

"And they were roo-" Cyno starts.

"The other one—I believe it's Cyno's—is "I wanted to go to Main Campus, but because of The Sandy Desert I am stuck in a janitor's closet"," Tighnari reads.

"Don't avert from the conversation," Cyno glares.

"Last one is "I wanted to go to Main Campus, but because of The Janitors I am stuck in a janitor's closet" Wow. That's boring," The forest ranger sighs, "expected from Alhaitham."

"I just realized that they have a card about Alhaitham's ass, and this game is about slang, and current things everyone knows," Cyno suddenly says.

Alhaitham sighs.

"They should have one of Kaveh's ass because of that one shot at 44 seconds," Cyno mumbles to himself.

"Anyways, Kaveh won because even though it was dirty, it was actually humorous," Tighnari tosses the black card to Kaveh.

"Why'd you have to toss it!" Kaveh complains as the card flew out of Kaveh's reach onto the floor, "anyways, I get a black card, right?"

"Yes," Alhaitham says, still a bit blushy about Kaveh's white card.

Kaveh picks up a black card, eyebrows raising when he reads it in his head.

"Kaveh, do you have something to share with the class?" Tighnari says, doing a very successful impression of that one annoying teacher we all have.

""Mommy loves daddy very much but currently mommy loves __ more" who came up with this?" Kaveh asks aloud.

"What, does it relate to you?" Alhaitham asks.

"What? NO! Of course not!" Kaveh huffs, setting the black card in the center of the table not-so-gently.

"Ooooo, I've got a good one for this," Cyno smirks.

"Whatever you think is good is bad," Kaveh says.

In 47 seconds exactly, Kaveh picks up the white cards, having shuffled them at 49.

""Mommy loves daddy very much but currently mommy loves My Stuffed Aranara Toy more", Cyno, was this yours?" Kaveh sighs.

"No." He says simply, still grinning like a maniac.

"Mk..." Kaveh says wearily.

""Mommy loves daddy very much but currently mommy loves A Fun Round of TCG more" CYNO THIS ISN'T FUNNY,"

"Oh? You don't get it, you see, we are only playing this game because TCG is not fun anymore-" Cyno starts.

"NEXT!" Tighnari yells.

""Mommy loves daddy very much but currently mommy loves Depression more"—" Kaveh bursts out laughing, Tighnari smirks, eyeing Cyno.

"Why is Tighnari's so funny and mine isnt?" Cyno asks.

"Because this relates to me and it's so true!" Kaveh snorts, causing himself to laugh more.

Soon Tighnari joined it, then Cyno, but he was just laughing because everyone else was, and Alhaitham just breathes.

"We all know the winner," Kaveh wheezes, passing the card over to him.

"HA! I go again!" Tighnari lifts a new black card from the pile.

""How are the creators of Cards Against Teyvat spending your mora?" Hmm... I see many ways this can be funny," Tighnari lets the card out of his grip and into the middle of the circular table.

Kaveh laughs out loud at one of his own white cards, making Cyno and Tighnari look at each other in pity for their own sanity. Once all the cards were gathered, Tighnari just decided to say them all at the same time and not let anyone interrupt him.

""How are the creators of Cards Against Teyvat spending your mora?" Helping Children, Blackmailing A Homeless Person, and Finally Buying A Good Coffee Machine," Tighnari says.

"I'm actually curious if Alhaitham or Cyno did the coffee one," Tighnari wonders aloud.

"What if I did it?" Kaveh teases.

"You did the blackmailing thing, obviously," Cyno says.

"Yeah, you're right," Kaveh admits.

"Well the Coffee one won either way," Tighnari shrugs.

Alhaitham takes the black card from the center, grabbing a new one after.

""This is the prime of my life; I'm young, hot, and full of __"" Alhaitham quotes.

The white cards are thrown into the pile unceremoniously.

""This is the prime of my life; I'm young, hot, and full of... Kaveh, I swear. Full of Greater Lord Rukkhadevata. I'm full of Crippling debt," Kaveh snorts. "I'm full of Humor."

Alhaitham takes a few moments to decide.

"Crippling debt. Although I am not fond of humor, this is amusing to me," He says, pointing the card in the direction of Tighnari or Kaveh to grab.

"Actually," Cyno starts dramatically, "that's my card."

"I just gave a trash card," Tighnari offers an excuse.

"Okay then," Alhaitham hands the card to Cyno, who happily takes it and adds it to his own pile of 1.

""My mom was ___ when she visited my dorm room". Interesting. I request humor rather than logic," Cyno stares at Alhaitham to get his point across.

Tighnari smirks, Kaveh grins, Alhaitham breathes.

"So soon, I thought I'd have to wait long until you chose your cards. "My mom was Bullying A Student For Being A Haravatat A Year After You Graduated The Same Class when she visited my dorm room" Funny. "My mom was A Fatui Harbinger when she visited my dorm". "My mom was- Kaveh." Cyno stops talking to stare, or glare, at Kaveh.

"Yes?" Kaveh asks innocently, batting his eyes.

Cyno sighs.

""My mom was Scattering My Grandfather's Ashes when she visited my dorm room"" Cyno says, sighing once more.

"What!? It's funny!" Kaveh defends.

"It doesn't matter, the "My mom was Bullying A Student For Being A Haravatat A Year After You Graduated The Same Class when she visited my dorm room" wins anyways," Cyno announces.

Alhaitham reaches to grab the black card from the center of the table.

"NO!" Kaveh gasps, "he won!?"

"Yes, Kaveh, get it in that miniscule brain of yours that I can physically achieve something," Alhaitham remarks.

"Oh yeah!? Well—I bet you're gonna choose my card!" Kaveh shoots back.

"That would be nearly impossible, our humor and choices do not align," Alhaitham concludes.

"You are not done, your conclusions SUCK! That's why you got a..." Kaveh paused for emphasis, "That's why you graduated AP Physics 10 with an A- in middle school!"

Gasps come from Tighnari and Cyno.

"So? It is merely a grade, I fixed it by extra credit," The sage explains.

"No! You're supposed to make a whole deal out of it because I finally got under your skin!" Kaveh complains.

""I'm sorry professor, but I couldn't complete my homework because of __"" Alhaitham ignores Kaveh.

"You-!" Kaveh stops, staring at the mans face, then laughs to himself.

"What's happening?" Cyno asks Tighnari in a whisper.

"I think Kaveh has some 6th sense for Alhaitham's expressions and something was funny about it," Tighnari theoried.

Kaveh throws a white card upside down into the pile.

"You're gonna love this card, it relates to us very much and you're too stupid to even realize it," Kaveh smirks.

"Okay," Alhaitham is unaffected.

The other put/bounce their cards to the center after some scheming, and Alhaitham shuffles it with his eyes closed ("I memorized who put what card down and I want Kaveh to have somewhat of a fair round").

""I'm sorry professor, but I couldn't complete my homework because of Dead Parents" Haha Kaveh," Alhaitham sarcasms, Tighnari cries like a proud mother in the corner.

Kaveh puts on a poker face, simply staring at Alhaitham with a surprisingly controlled expression (Thoma, Fischl, and Yun jin are proud of him). He can't make him think that card was or wasn't him. This will make him flip and will be funny if he chooses Kaveh's card, and that has to happen. Kaveh will forever hold it against him. Nhahahaahah.

""I'm sorry professor, but I couldn't complete my homework because of A Hopeless Amount of Desert Foxes" Kaveh. You are not going to try to bring home more foxes," Alhaitham says.

Kaveh remains poker facing.

""I'm sorry professor, but I couldn't complete my homework because of Sexual Tension With My Roommate", Tighnari would choose this card." Alhaitham said, blushing slightly at the meaning of the black and white cards.

Kaveh previously said that it was related to them and Alhaitham was too stupid to see it. It can't be Dead Parents. Even if Kaveh is a dirty joke person, he wouldn't ever think of sexual tension with his roommate... So Kaveh's must've been the Desert Fox one.

"I choose the Dead Parents card," Alhaitham says.

Cyno grabs the black card, making Alhaitham look to Kaveh.

"Which one was yours?" Alhaitham asks politely.

"The sexual tension one! I told you you're too stupid!" Kaveh says.

"But Kaveh, you lost." Alhaitham deapans, no sympathy.

"Oh shut up," Kaveh elbows him.

Alhaitham elbows him back a little more aggressively.

Kaveh shoves Alhaitham with his elbow, quickly leaning away from Alhaitham so he isn't hit again.

Alhaitham kicks him.

Kaveh elbows him again, confusing Alhaitham with an alternating pattern just to kick him with more force.

"HAHA I won!" Kaveh says triumphantly.

Alhaitham elbows him so hard Kaveh falls out of his chair.

"How about we change games?" Tighnari offers.

"I'll bring the next one," Alhaitham volunteers, acting as if nothing happened.

--

Alhaitham brings everyone's agony; Monopoly.

*dramatic pause*

He always arrives first, so he set up the board, the new-edition Parchment metal piece representing the book worm ready on the GO square. Cyno arrives, groaning at the sight, even if he's only played once, his memories are not positive ones. Then comes Tighnari, who doesn't say anything, but grabs the Leaf piece and puts it next to Cyno's Mahamatra Hat.

"NO!" Is the first thing the trio hear of Kaveh.

There he is, hair a mess—the trade he took to be on-time—groaning about a stupid game.

"Of course you chose Monopoly of all things," Kaveh sighs.

"I know you are not fond of this game, but that isn't why I brought it. I find the game thrilling," Alhaitham says, like the boring person he is.

"Of course you do," Kaveh sighs once more.

"Wow, you're sarcastic today," Tighnari notes, shuffling the 'mystery' card deck.

Kaveh grabs the metal house, giving it a remark of how boring it looked, placing it on the board far away from Alhaitham's piece to indirectly tell him 'I HATE YOU'.

"Left of the dealer goes first," Tighnari says as he sets down the shuffled Mystery deck.

"But no one dealt," Cyno realizes.

"Then why do we already have all our money as if someone dealt it out?" Tighnari stares at Cyno in a glare of some sort.

It ended up being Kaveh's turn. With the two die, he got a 3, so he landed on a property selling for a whopping $60.

"I'll take it," Kaveh says, reluctantly giving it to Alhaitham, who was the banker.

"$60 for Baltic Avenue," Alhaitham gives the property card to Kaveh.

That's how it started off. Alhaitham did a full circle (claiming $200 because he passed GO) before anyone else did, as a landmark, it is a need to report what everyone has.

Alhaitham- $340, 5 properties, all at a decent price (~$250)

Kaveh- $325, that one $60 one, a railroad, and water works (he kept landing on everyone's properties so he lost like $100 to that)

Cyno- $267, 2 properties and the the one and only Boardwalk ($400 to buy)

Tighnari- $308, 2 railroads and 2 properties ($100 and $300)

"If you buy that $60 property I'll give you $70," Kaveh proposes to Alhaitham.

"I reject your offer," Alhaitham simply puts.

"$75?"

"No,"

"$80?"

"No,"

"$90?"

"No,"

"$100?"

"No,"

"$105?"

"No,"

"$110?"

"No,"

"$115?"

"No,"

"$120?"

"No,"

"$130?!"

"No,"

"$140?!"

"No,"

"$150!?"

"Yes,"

"Geez man, you almost made me lose all my money..." Kaveh looks down at his money... he'd lose almost half his money for a $60 property! "I actually don't want to do this deal anymore."

"Kaveh, you can't just do that," Cyno says.

"He's gonna steal all my money!" Kaveh defends.

"That's the point of this game," Cyno says.

"Fine! I'm gonna buy so many hotels with my new monopoly Alhaitham's gonna owe me big time!" Kaveh plans.

"You have to wait your turn," Tighnari reminds, holding the rule book.

Kaveh wants to flip the board.

The next hour, nothing really big happened. Tighnari and Alhaitham traded properties in secrecy, Cyno got the other expensive blue property, Park Place, and got a group of houses on it. Kaveh made two hotels on his property and got an $100 one, before Tighnari would pay him double for it, so now he's back to two properties along with his railroad and water works. That is, until Cyno wanted to complete his railroad collection and bought the $200 piece for $350. Kaveh felt rich, so he got another hotel.

The die shows a 2 and 5 on the surface, so Alhaitham moves his metal piece 7 times, landing on Mystery. He picks up a card and silently does what is says, moving his piece to Jail.

"HA you got to jail!" Kaveh says triumphantly.

"It happens," He says.

"What is that supposed to mean?" Kaveh asks.

Being in jail means Alhaitham can't move for 3 rounds unless he has a Get Out of Jail Free card, which he doesn't have. The game continues as if little happened -if not Kaveh smiling more- until Kaveh rolls a 2.

2s aren't bad or anything, he just lands on the second most expensive property in the game. It doesn't have any houses or hotels, but since Kaveh sucks at saving his money in real life and in game, he doesn't have enough to pay, so make an excuse, quick!

"I'm not paying money to a criminal!" Kaveh says, pointing at the sage.

"You have to pay, It's in this version of the game," Tighnari says, skimming over the instructions.

"Oh COME ON!" Kaveh says, "do I at least get a discount?"

"No." Tighnari says.

"Ugh," Kaveh slowly grabs his remaining money and gives it to Alhaitham.

"You know you could've sold your hotels," Alhaitham says, putting Kaveh's money into his own collection.

"Yeah, but I want you to land on them so I can be revived," Kaveh smirks.

"I'm sorry, you can do that?" Cyno asks.

"No, that's a weird house rule that doesn't apply here. Kaveh's out of the game," Tighnari says lamely, rolling the die.

He goes in the two places right between Cyno's two blue properties that charge like, $200 a night (that's a lot). At this, Cyno realized that he was probably going to be out if someone didn't land on his spaces soon.

"What! No, I'm confident I've played like this with other people!" Kaveh defends.

"Whatever, that doesn't change the rules right now," Alhaitham says.

"Shut up, you!" Kaveh frowns, standing up, "you better keep the hotels on my spaces."

"Okay, sure, we'll pay the bank or whatever," Tighnari sighs.

Kaveh leaves, mad at the game, and Cyno is soon to go out. He was good at saving, but he landed on this Tax card that said you had to pay $150 to this parking thing, I don't know, it's kind of wack. He is now at 25 bucks. He's a bit nervous.

Suddenly they heard heavy footsteps returning to their table.

"Did you forget something?" Cyno asked, he hadn't noticed anything left behind.

"Yeah, my Legally Blonde Purse," Kaveh sighs, then pauses, "where'd it go?"

Cyno sat up taller to try and see anything, but to no avail.

"Did you even bring it here in the first place? I didn't see anything plastic in this room except for you," Alhaitham insults.

"EXCUSE YOU!" Kaveh screeches. "My ass is 100% true, all skin and tissues and whatever's in a butt, don't you dare insult it," Kaveh says, flipping his hair dramatically.

"Whatever, you want to stay and watch us kill Alhaitham?" Tighnari asks.

"Sure!" Kaveh smiles, sitting back down quickly.

Cyno starts sweating after a few minutes, it's gonna be his turn, and he's still at his $25. If he lands on any space owned by anyone, he's dead, and he really doesn't want to sell his properties. In addition, there's this new rule that you can't sell your hotels or properties if you're going to die that turn, which is really stupid, but he's confident! Right?

Of course, he lands on Alhaitham's property. Great.

"Whoops." Suddenly, the board is falling off the table.

"Kaveh!"

"I'll bring the next game," Tighnari says after a long sigh.

--

When Tighnari enters the tavern, he greets Alhaitham and Cyno, presenting Catan Jr., and some obscure Avidya forest traditional game about herbalists and the Withering. After Kaveh arrives, they decide to play Catan Jr. first.

"I CALL ORANGE!"

"There isn't an orange"

"FUCK!"

"Personally, I'm picking white,"

"What, because your hair's white?"

"...no."

"I'm picking green then,"

"But I'm green,"

"You get black, because your hair's black,"

"AND green,"

"I have a dendro vision!"

"I do too, or did you just forget?"

"Of course not! It's just that I'm more important!"

"Then where were you in the Archon Quest? Huh?"

In their bickering, Alhaithma swiftly took the green pieces, as he was more important than both of them in the Archon Quest and he also has a dendro vision.

"But look, mine radiates this certain green, see—" Kaveh was going to pick up a piece to compare, but they're gone!?

"You took too long," Alhaitham says, but his attention is clearly given to his book he's holding.

"I- pu- ARG I hate you Alhaitham!" Kaveh screeches.

"I don't mind," He says mildly.

"If you don't mind then give me your piece!" Kaveh orders.

"No," He denies.

"Kaveh you have to take the white, kinda matches cause you're pale as the clouds," Tighnari shoves the pieces to Kaveh. "Anyways, this game is simple so I'm not going to explain it—I'm saving that time for the forest ranger game—but have fun! I'll deal the cards out because I'm not that rude though."

They set up their pieces on the board and roll the die.

"HAHA I GET A GOAT AND YOU DON'T!" Kaveh brags in front of Alhaitham.

"I get wood though, which I need for a fortress," Alhaitham says.

Kaveh's face falls into anger.

"Tighnari he's breaking the rules!" Kaveh rages.

"Not really," He says casually.

Kaveh's rage points: 1

The game continues, Alhaitham's the first to reach the middle with a base so he can get gold pieces when someone rolls a three, Kaveh following after quickly so he can get them when someone rolls a five.

Next round Cyno rolls a three.

Kaveh's rage points: 2

"I have too many goats!" Kaveh complains.

"You know you can trade them," Cyno informs.

"What didn't you tell me!?"

Kaveh's rage points: 3

"I thought you knew," Cyno says simply.

Kaveh's rage points: 4

Next round, Tighnari gains enough wood to make a fortress, but he builds two boats, because he also has enough for that. He built a boat leading to the gold square, but also backwards? No one knows what he's up to.

Tighnari smirks at the rest of the group, motioning for them to continue.

"I don't know what you're up to but you're super suspicious," Kaveh glares at the forest ranger.

"Why? I just used my materials, now you're richer than me," Tighnari.

"I will-- WHY IS THERE ONLY GOATS IN THE TRADE CENTER," Kaveh shouts.

Kaveh's rage points: 5

"I GIVE UP!" Kaveh stands and takes all his pieces, putting them back in the box. "I need one of you to beat Alhaitham, so I'm going to watch you do it."

After five rounds Cyno gets pissed and quits. Now it's not even a game with two players, so they just stop. Onto the next game.

"So you get five cards, you get three, I get seven, and you get one," Tighnari says while dealing.

"What!? That's unfair!" Kaveh protests, looking at his one card.

"It's how the game works. So your goal is to ruin humanity, but the rest of us want to stop the withering. You have your cards, the more the better, and you decide to either draw or get rid of your card. If you have 9 cards then you're disqualified, but if you lose all of them you have to take everyone's cards and if it adds up to 11 then you have to give three gold pieces to the person to your left," Tighnari explains.

Kaveh and Cyno make eye contact because they're both confused and don't know what the heck is happening.

"...with that combo you can apply hydro to the withering plant. If you add electro then you'll do 2 damage, any other reaction will do five. The withering plant has 250 health so don't ever use that reaction if you want to win," Tighnari finishes.

"Let's just play and get it over with," Cyno sighs.

To say that Alhaitham was annoyed at a game meant a lot, that also means that Kaveh and Cyno are fuming as Tighnari makes a combo from drawing cards to using sixteen (because there's this weird rule...) to do 100 damage!? Like what!? To say he dominated at the game was a severe understatement.

"I propose we stop playing," Alhaitham says.

"Okay," Tighnari says, and starts packing up. "It was kinda getting boring anyways, you gotta play with people who know the game."

"THEN WHY'D YOU BRING IT HERE!?" Kaveh shouts.

"Geez, I just haven't played it in a while. I chose a game, and we played it. That's what we've been doing," Tighnari defends.

"Then Cyno you better bring a good game," Kaveh huffs, picking up his things and tossing it into the game bin.

"Noo Kaveh, you have to organize it from backwards damage to power to elemental mastery to-" Tighnari starts.

"Cyno you better not disappoint me," Kaveh says, then leaves the bar.

Alhaitham leaves quickly after sorting the cards in the right order, running after Kaveh so he doesn't have to sit on their stoop for too long, or get mugged or kidnapped.

--

"Wow, I'm actually having fun at this, even if I'm losing!" Kaveh says positively.

"I brought a better game, simple as that," Cyno says, looking through his deck.

Cyno was extremely mysterious about what game he was going to bring next week, no matter how much Tighnari asked or tried to bribe. But when he put a familiar box in the center of the table, where the flower pot would normally be, everyone seemed content.

Maybe everyone wasn't bored of the game, the game they used to play: Genius Invocation TCG.

"I swear TCG means The Card Game, like what else, Genius Invocation The Card Game!" Kaveh says, leaving out the more dirty options in his brain.

"No, It has to mean Tracing Corny Garlic," Tighnari brings in his Timmy card after he uses the last of his Katheryne.

"I've spent my time in a rabbit hole and came with Teamwork Coordinated Galaxy," Cyno says, rolling his die after Tighnari's move.

"Coordinated? But it's literally a fighting game," Tighnari reasons.

"I hold my opinion. Tracing Corny Garlic doesn't even make sense," Cyno says.

"Dude, you know how sarcastic I am," Tighnari says.

The rest of the squad rolls their dice, selecting their few to reroll. On a whim, Kaveh gets four hydro die, compared to Alhaitham's also hydro die. Except only one actually needed the said die.

"It's actually Trading Card Game," Alhaitham says, using three of his four hydro dice to use Mona's burst.

"Trading!?" The other three shout at the same time.

"What do you trade? Souls?" Kaveh snorts to himself. Tighnari snorts at Kaveh.

"Honestly probably. But at least this is better than Monopoly and Catan. I didn't know those would go as poorly as they did," Tighnari sighs to himself.

"Are you saying that Cards Against Teyvat was a success..?" Kaveh asks, batting his eyes dramatically.

"Sure, idiot," Tighnari laughs.

"Hey! I'm gonna use my Diluc on you!" Kaveh threatens.

"Go ahead, but you're gonna let Cyno get the kill 'cause he has Fischl's burst ready," Tighnari shrugs.

"Man, if only I had some alcohol... oh wait, I do!" Kaveh reaches for his sake cup.

"No, you're not drinking tonight," Alhaitham says.

"What are you, my boyfriend?" Kaveh asks before drinking it all.

"Are we not?" Alhaitham asks.

Kaveh spits the liquor onto the table.

"I'm sorry WHAT!?" Kaveh shouts.

"Ah, we love TCG, if only someone would go..." The general sighs.

"WHAT!?" Kaveh shouts again.

"It's your turn," Tighnari says lamely.

"Alhaitham, do you genuinely like me.. Like, like-like me?" Kaveh asks, voice lower than normal.

"Yes?" Alhaitham says.

"Why haven't you told me?" Kaveh asks.

"Because I thought you knew," Alhaitham says honestly.

"It's your tuuuuurn!" Tighnari sings.

"But they're finally getting together?" Cyno thinks aloud.

"It's like how you totally thought we weren't dating..." The forest ranger laughs, taking a sip of sake.

"We aren't dating though..?"

"Girl, we've been dating for the past year, after the traveler set us up," Tighnari sighs.

"WHAT!?!"