Chapter three !
Earths not so pleasant

Back at camp, Carmen sat by Jasper brushing her fingers through his hair, grimacing every time he groaned in pain as his whole body reacted each time Clarke touched him. She couldn't remember the last time she slept but her body wouldn't let her knowing the boy in front of her was dying, Camila left hours ago— she wouldn't watch her friend die. Carmen watched Clarke mess with the boy's wound, she watched the blonde's movements with worried eyes. The girl knew she kind of knew what she was doing because her mother was a doctor on the ark but she was just a girl.

"How's he doing?" Wells approaches the two, leaning down. "How does it look like he's doing, Wells?" Clarke snaps, not even looking at the boy, Carmen raises her eyebrows at the blondes tone. "I'm just trying to help," Wells responds calmly, Jaspers moans as his body flinches.

Carmen watches the two with unknowing eyes, she has no clue what happened between the two but she does not want to be a part of it. "Alright, you want to help?" Clarke asks, looking at Wells, "Hold him down." Carmen squeezes her eyes shut knowing what's happening. "Fuck," she mutters to herself as she holds down his shoulders as Wells and Finn hold his legs. 'Oh my god,' she repeats to herself as she watches Clarke put the knife in the fire, pressing it to his wound.

The Flores girl squeezes her eyes as the boy screams in pain, "I'm sorry," she apologizes quietly holding his shoulders tighter.

"Stop it, you're killing him." Octavia says as she gets into the room, "She's trying to save his life," Finn responds. Bellamy comes up the ladder, "She can't."

Carmen rolls her eyes, "Shut up."

"We didn't drag him through miles of woods just to let him die," Clarke defends the helpless boy, Carmen glares at the older boy. "Kids a goner. If you can't see that, you're deluded. He's making people crazy," Bellamy looked down at the boy, and the girl rolled her eyes again.

"Shut up," Carmen spat looking up at Bellamy, he looked down at the girl, Carmen's eyes were puffy and red, he could tell she hadn't slept properly in days, he turned away at the sound of Clarke's voice. "Sorry if Jasper's an inconvenience to you but this isn't the ark, down here every life matters." Clarke argued not looking at the boy, Carmen's glare stayed on his.

She couldn't understand how the others wanted him to die, she knew it was hard to hear his screams at night but it was stupid and she could not understand. "Take a look at him, he's a lost cause." Bellamy points at the injured boy, Carmen turns away to look at him as she pats his head with a cloth. He's just a boy.

"Octavia, I've spent my whole life watching my mother heal people. If I say there's hope, there's hope." Clarke comforts the brunette, Octavia looks up at Carmen who comfortingly smiles at her.

Bellamy watches his sister, "This isn't about hope, it's about guts. You don't have the guts to make the hard choices, I do," Carmen and Clarke roll their eyes at the boy, who put him in charge? They say to each other as they lock eyes. "He's been like this for three days, if he's not better by tomorrow, I'll kill him myself."

She watches as he leaves, she looks down at Jasper before she follows him, "Bellamy, hey!" Carmen calls out as they leave the drop ship. "Asshole," she grabs his wrist to stop him he turns around with a glare, his eyes drop to her hand wrapped around his arm, looking up at her again, Carmen tilts her head before she lets go.

"You can't kill him," She says looking around and seeing others watching them. "Blake, he's just a kid!" She yelled, Bellamy's eyes widened at the loudness. She looked around again seeing more people, "Jesus," she muttered as she wiped her eyes, Bellamy watched her with worried eyes before pulling her arm.

Carmen looked up as they walked between the kids, the two approached a group of boys. Carmen watched as he grabbed two weapons, turning around to hand one out for the girl. The black hair girl stared at it before grabbing the handle tightly, "C'mon, let's go." And for some reason, Carmen Flores followed Bellamy Blake into the forest.

Gripping onto the weapon in her hand Carmen watched him silently walk towards an animal, warning the other it was his to kill. She looked around in fear, she knew there was someone out there she felt the eyes burning into her skin. She flinched at the sound of Bellamy's weapon hitting the tree, she snapped her head seeing a young girl standing beside that tree only a few inches away from the sharp object.

Bellamy walked up to the girl, "Who the hell are you?"

"Charlotte."

Carmen stood beside Bellamy, why would they send a little girl down to earth not knowing if it was survivable? "I almost killed you," Bellamy says as he grabs the axe from the tree. "Why aren't you back at camp?"

"Well, with that guy dying, I just-- I couldn't listen anymore," Charlotte spoke looking at the three people in front of her, Carmen frowned.

"There's grounders out here." Atom speaks up, "It's  too dangerous for a little girl." Charlotte squints her eyes at the older boy, "I'm not little." Carmen smiles at her, she looks at Bellamy who hands the girl a knife from his pocket allowing her to hunt with the group, Carmen lays her hand on the young girl's shoulders as she passes her.

Charlotte stays by Carmen as they walk through the woods, she's nervous but doesn't want to go back to camp. "I always liked the name Charlotte," Carmen breaks the silence between the two girls, and Charlotte looks up at the girl who smiled. "Really?" Carmen hummed, looking down at the young girl. The Flores girl unknowing of another pair of eyes on her, smiling at her.

A loud blaring sound cut through the air, the four stopping in their tracks Carmen looked over at her shoulder for Bellamy, and he grabbed onto the girls ushering them to run. The girl took off in a run looking over her shoulder frantically seeing a yellow fog getting closer to them, pushing Charlotte closer to the Blake boy.

"C'mon, there's caves this way," She heard Bellamy yell through the loud wind, she looked over her shoulder the yellow fog was right behind her, she saw Bellamy a few feet away but she heard Atom call his name. Carmen coughed as the fog swallowed her, she coughed quickly covering her mouth.

"Carmen," Bellamy called out stepping out and wrapping his arm around her waist and pulling her into the cave. She pushed his arm off her body as she hunched over and coughed her hands laid on her knees, Bellamy rested his hand on her back for one short moment Carmen almost missed it. "We might as well get some rest while we're here."

A few hours later, the sun had set as Carmen sat against the hard wall of the cave, she stared at Bellamy's sleeping body, and she decided that she couldn't sleep after an hour of staring at the rocks. As she sat in silence, Carmen thought about her father even though he probably didn't care that she was gone, Carmen worried for him. Carmen was the only one keeping him alive, defending him even though she shouldn't because she knew her mother would. Alejandra Flores was one of the few good people on the ark, she never treated anyone differently based on their privilege. Carmen wanted to live that on.

Her thoughts were cut off by the sound of Charlottes shouts, "No!" She thrashed on the hard rock waking Bellamy up, Carmen sat up as Bellamy sat up. "Charlotte, wake up."

The young girl woke up in fright looking around once she realized she was safe and was in a nightmare her shoulders relaxed, tensing again in embarrassment, "I'm sorry," Charlotte looked away from the two adults who watched her in worry.

Carmen put her hand on the girl's arm, "It's okay."

"Does it happen often?" Bellamy questioned with furrowed eyebrows, Charlotte sighed ignoring the question. Carmen squeezed her arm trying her best to comfort the young girl, she remembered her mothers soothing her hair back when she would wake up the same way. Alejandra would hum soothingly and Carmen would fall asleep instantly.

"What are you scared of?" He asked Charlotte. She ignored the question and his worried eyes. "You know what? It doesn't matter. The only thing that matters is what you do about it." Bellamy stated. He'd known what Charlotte was feeling.

Charlotte locked eyes with the older boy, "But-- I'm asleep." She said in a questioning tone, the boy shakes his head. "Fears are fears." He states, looking out of the corner of his eye feeling Carmen eyes on him, she was smiling.

"Slay your demons when you're awake, they won't be there to get you when you sleep." Bellamy tapped his arm against her leg, Carmen smiled at the interaction. This was a side that Bellamy never showed around anyone else since they arrived at earth, he needed to be the leader and leaders don't show weakness.

The young girl looked at the boy then to the black hair girl beside him, Carmen just wanted to protect her, she knew it was inevitable for the girl to face horrible things. "Yeah but how?" She asked, she was too young to know how to fight things or protect herself.

"You can't afford to be weak, down here, weakness is death, fear is death," Bellamy said, Carmen turned her head to look at him. She would've worded it better but as she looked at Charlotte she didn't see fear. Carmen felt more fear in her body than she saw in Charlottes eyes, it worried her but she ignored it.

Bellamy looked between the two girls, wondering how to comfort Charlotte more until an idea popped into his head.

"Let me see that knife I gave you." He says putting his hand out, Carmen furrowed her eyebrows, Charlotte pulled out the knife placing it in the boys hand. Carmen raised her hand on the girls arm, rubbing soothing circles as her mom did to her.

Bellamy grabbed onto the knife, "Now when you feel afraid, you hold tight to that knife and you say 'screw you, I'm not afraid.'" Bellamy said before handing the knife back, Carmen definitely thinks there's better ways to help the girl but continues to rub circles on the girls skin as she repeats his words unconvincing, the two adults give her a look before she repeats it. They both smile as the girl lays back down, Bellamy doing the same. He closes his eyes for a few moments before he realizes he doesn't hear Carmen doing the same.

He opens his eyes as he turns his head to see Carmen sitting up, fingers playing with her hat that now lays on her lap instead of sitting on her bed. Bellamy adjusts himself until he's sitting across from her in the same position.

"Can't sleep?" He said looking at the girl, she doesn't look up. She continues to mess with her hat, he furrows his eyebrows watching her. "I never can," Carmen says softly, still avoiding his eyes. Carmen loved to dream, she dreamed of moments like this— well dreamed of moments of her living on earth, definitely in a better way. The Flores girl never seemed to be able to sleep though, maybe it because her mother always helped her sleep or because she was terrified of falling asleep as her father died by choking on his own vomit.

Bellamy tilted his head his eyes roaming the girls body like he was examining her, Carmen felt his eyes burning into her body but she kept her eyes on her lap.

"My mother, she always helped me." Carmen said looking up, she knew Bellamy knew what she felt in some ways. He did, he knew exactly what the girl in front of him was feeling, his eyes held pity and Carmen hated that but she knew it was because he knew.

She licked her lips looking away, Carmen didn't talk much about her mother. She thought about her a lot but talking about her felt too real, that she was gone and she would never see her again, she knew it was real every day when her father would remind her. Her father grew to hate his daughter and not because of who she was but who she reminded him of.
You are a spitting image of your mother.

"Why do you always wear that?" Bellamy said bringing the girl back, she looked at him questioningly. He jerked his head to her lap, her eyes fell onto the hat making her smile, she remembered being a kid and her mother wearing it.

"My mom used to wear it, I don't know why since we lived in space but she loved it. She gave it to me before," Carmen cut herself off, Bellamy knew what she meant. Alejandra Flores' death was big on the ark, she was on the council and no one knew why she was floated, there were plenty of rumors and questions but no one answered them. The council was too ashamed of themselves, Carmen told the harsh truth. "She told me it was her good luck charm, figured I could use that down here."

Bellamy chuckled as he laid back down, sleep sneaking up on him again, he looked at Carmen. "Still not tired?" He asked, she laughed laying her jacket on the floor beside him before she laid on it.

"You're not as bad as you make yourself look, Blake."

Bellamy turned his head with a small smile, Carmen felt his eyes on her but continued to stare at the ceiling of the cave. "Thanks, sweetheart." He whispered watching Carmen roll her eyes at the nickname, "Don't push it." She spoke softly, turning her head to smile at him. The nickname became a tease when Carmen Flores first met Bellamy Blake, just a small threat made.

"Get me on that drop ship and I won't cut your male parts."

"Well aren't you a sweetheart."

In the morning, Carmen woke up by Bellamy shaking her. She squeezed her eyes before opening them seeing him standing above her, "Let's go," He whispered jerking his head, Carmen stood up quickly squeezing her eyes at the dizziness. She pulled her jacket onto her body as she followed Bellamy outside, the fog was gone, the older girl looked down as Charlotte stood beside her.

"Anybody out there?" Bellamy stepped forward, Carmen looked around hoping to see a familiar face especially Atom, "Jones?" He called out hearing an answer the three followed the voice.

Carmen smiled seeing three other teenagers, she didn't know them, even their names but she was grateful to see them alive, "Wheres Atom?" She asked, the boy in front shook his head also wondering where he was. Her stomach twisted quickly turning around to find him, the others understood her as they went different ways. She bit her lip as she walked through the forest, she watched him trip and continued to run. He had to have found a cave, right?

High pitched screaming echoed through the woods. Carmen snapped her head around at the sound, Charlotte. She took off in a run following the sound of her screams, I want to go home. Carmen's stomach continued to twisted in anxiety as she got closer, seeing the girls figure. Her body coming to a halt at the sight in front of her, her breath catching in her throat as she gasped loudly. She felt someone come behind her but stared at Atom lying on the dirt covered in blood.

Carmen watched as Bellamy dropped to his knees beside him, Carmen slowly approached shutting her eyes at his skin. It had many bumps and it looked like it was burned all over, his eyes were different. She felt whatever she had eaten in the past days coming up her throat.

She swallowed leaning closer to the boy, he was speaking, trying too. "Kill me," Carmen heard him shakily whisper, he repeated it as his breathing got heavier. The girl watched him struggle, she shook her head watching water drop onto the boys shirt, she furrowed her eyebrows putting her hand on her face feeling the dampness.

Wiping away her tears she kept her eyes on the boy, the voices around her becoming quiet. She should've helped him. "Carmen, you should go back to camp," Bellamy said watching the girl, her hands had fallen onto the boys hair, running her fingers through his hair.

"You can't do this alone," Carmen whispered turning her head, Bellamy's jaw was clenched as he looked into her eyes. She smiled softly, he nodded his head putting the knife to Atom's throat. He turned his head meeting eyes with Carmen's tearful ones, he did his best to smile, thank you. Carmen's lips tugged, she nodded her head. Bellamy's hands shakily held the knife against his throat looking between him and Carmen, he couldn't do it. Carmen looked up from the hurt boy seeing Bellamys hesitation, she licked her bottom lip. She couldn't do it either.

The black haired girl looked over the boys shoulder, Clarke sped up to the two on the ground, Carmen stood up giving Clarke space. Clarke could help him. She heard humming as Clarke brought a knife to his throat, Carmen brought her hand to her mouth stifling a sob. She should've helped him but maybe if she did it would've been both of them on the ground. Maybe that would've been better.

Carmen watched as they carried the boys lifeless body, tears continued to fall as she followed them. She followed Clarke into the drop ship in hopes to help keep Jasper alive instead of standing outside mourning a life she could have saved.

She sat against the wall beside Octavia, Monty passed her the drink, she quickly took a chug grimacing as the drink slid down her throat, she shook her head as she gave the glass to the girl next to her.

"Can I, uh, get a hit of that?" Everyone turned their head at the sound of Jaspers groggily voice cutting through the room, they all jumped up surrounding the boy. Carmen laid her hand on his shoulder with a smile as he looked around.

"My savior," Jasper laughed as Clarke approached the boy, Carmen moved over as the blonde kneeled down. The Flores girl felt her shoulders relax as she watched the boy smile looking around at his friends before he drifted off to sleep again. Earth was survivable but not what Carmen Flores dreamed of, there were survivors after the nuclear war.