"We did it!" Lance's voice rung out across the multitude of connected mics of the team.
  A mass response of cheers soon followed the blue (but former red) paladin as each spaceship flew to regroup.
  Although, aside from all of the others, Keith found himself hesitant. He was jostled... no...visibly shaking as he gripped his steering device as if it were an empty soda can. His eyes were wide with fright, his mouth agape as thoughts rushed through his mind. He had been so prepared, so ready to die in order for victory that him being alive was truly a new form of torture. Why had he done such a drastic thing? Why was he ready to die?
  "Keith? Where are you, we're regrouping and preparing to set off again before the Galra bring reinforcements." The voice of Pidge spoke, making Keith jump. How long had he been thinking?
  "I'm still here, just a little slow. I'll be right there." Keith replied, trying his best not to sound as broken as he was feeling.
  "You? Slow? Ha! Now that's a first! Hurry up, mullet, or we'll leave without-" Lance chimed in before being quickly cut off by Shiro.
  "Lance."
  "What? I was just making a point!"
  Keith sighed. At usual times he would simply laugh off Lance's remark, shooting back one just as truthful to retain his spot within their rivalry. Although, this time, something was different. Something felt different.
  Keith's mind wasn't as playful (if you would even describe it as such) as it was before. It was... darker, in a more negative focus. All he could think about was what he had just done and what could have happened. He was willing to die. Ready to die. It was almost as if there had been a want, a need to end the mass stress he had been feeling. The increasing pang of being so different. He felt alone... He WAS alone. Of course he had the other paladins as friends as well as Allura and Coran but it wasn't the same. He had no family to go home to, no parents, no siblings, not even a lover. There was no one for him to turn to at times like this.
  Even his position within Voltron itself remained unsteady. He had joined the Blades of Marmora, but if he left where would he go? Shiro had the black lion again and Keith could never take his lion back since the whole group had advanced without him, Lance included. He had no lion, no family, what was left? Nothing. It was as if he were a single flower in a field of nothing but dirt and rock; a rose struggling to survive yet dying with every passing second.
  Keith looked up, not being greeted by the dazzling stars in the galaxy beyond but by the castle instead.
  "Keith, land inside, there is a very important matter we must discuss as a group; Lotor." Allura stated in a tone of slight uneasiness over Keith's mic.
  "On my way." He replied quickly as to not reveal any possibly audible hints as to his hopeless state of mind.
  He turned into the docking bay, landing softly compared to the loud thunder of thoughts that spread across his mind and thickened his depressed attitude.
  Maybe... Just maybe this meeting will be able to make him forget everything, make things go back to the way they were before his hellish revelation of loneliness.
  He flew inside, landing his ship before making his way to the dining hall where much was visibly amiss already.
  Although, he stalled himself a bit. His mind was already rushing and yet there was something that made him begin to feel ill, a mere idea that remained in the back of his head along with a few others similar to it or related in some way; was he really meant to be alive? Was he really wanted to be alive?
  The overwhelming thoughts wouldn't simply quiet down for him and it didn't help when his path crossed with a certain alien being escorted by two rebels to the dining hall.
  Keith gave a warning glare to Lotor as he passed him, snarling in the process which, in turn confused the newly arrived Galra.
  "Why do you glare at me? I saved your life didn't I?" He retorted, receiving an instant halt from the Paladin
  "I don't know what games you're playing here, Lotor. We were perfectly fine without you." Keith growled.
  Unknown to both of them, Lance had decided to take the same route to the dining hall. Yet at the sound of the argument he couldn't help but pry, hiding himself away behind an outstretching wall. Why in the vast majority of space would Keith decide to pick a fight with the 'wild card' of the Galra empire?
  "Perfectly fine?" Lotor scoffed with a slight huff of laughter. "You would have died. I watched you heading for a collision course with that shield, without me you wouldn't be here to condemn me."
  "I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO SAVE ME!" Keith shouted whilst standing face-to-face with the alien Prince.
  The Paladin had practically ran out of breath from a simple sentence and didn't want to waste any more on the conversation. He stormed off, face pale as he gradually realized the meaning of his words, leaving behind a jostled Lotor and a hidden Lance to equally process the conversation.
  Lotor was lead forward to follow Keith to his destination, whereas Lance merely slunk against the wall in confusion.
  Keith had been going for a crash course with the shield? Why? Why would he have given his life up? He thought as he sat in silence. It didn't make sense to him. Keith wasn't likely to give himself up so easily, but why would he be willing to head for a dead-on collision?
  Alas, there was only questions for the poor gunman as he sat in thorough contemplation. Possibly he would have stayed as such if not for a wild Pidgeon discovering his whereabouts.
  "Lance? What are you doing here? We're supposed to be in the dining hall. You can finish your date with the wall later, let's go." She stated, accenting the word 'date' as much as she could.
  Lance gave a quick pout, quickly wondering whether or not he should confide in the young green Paladin. Although it didn't take him long to reject the idea as he stood up to follow her into the designated room, thoughts about Keith's words still circulating in his mind like a whirlpool.

  All throughout the debate and discussion of Lotor Keith couldn't focus. The overwhelming pain from a close suicide continued to eat at his brain like a group of maggots, never leaving him with peace. It was practically driving him mad with fear, mad with questions.

  Why am I alive?

  "But the question still remains if what Lotor is telling us is actually the truth." Shiro spoke, invoking further discussion along with a few words from the alien in question.

  Why am I alive?

  "Well from what information I've gathered Zarkon is after him. And he said his team turned on him too. That could be a motive." Pidge butted in, deepening the conversation even further.

Why am I alive?

  "Excuse me, I forgot to check my ship to make sure it was shut down. It was hit so I need to make sure it doesn't blow up." Keith said quickly, cutting everyone off as he rose from his seat. He just couldn't bear the weight of what he had done anymore, but he could also not bear the fact of the others finding out.
  "Can't you do that later? This is kind of important." Pidge replied while rising a suspicious brow.
  "I just want to check." Keith replied while looking Pidge straight in the eye.
  "You okay, Keith?" Lance asked a little while after, making the original red Paladin stiffen like a board.
  "I'm fine." He quickly shot back, leaving the room before more questions could be asked.
  This sudden excuse made Lance furrow his brows in worry, remembering what Keith had said earlier to Lotor. He could feel deep down in his gut that something was wrong, but he just couldn't put his finger on it. So he went with Keith's excuse for the time being, thinking that perhaps he could be telling the truth and would be back soon.
  Although Lance promised himself that if Keith didn't return within seven minutes or so he would go check on the 'mullet with mood swings' (a new nickname that he had come up with on the spot and was frankly very proud of).

  Keith breathed more and more heavily the closer he got to his room, taking an alternate route to avoid any crossing paths with comrades or anyone else.
  He clutched his chest with an unusually shaky hand as a sort of unrecognizable pain wormed its way through his veins and to the pounding beats of his heart. Although such an increased heartbeat is understandable considering the plans that had worked their way into the previously red paladin's mind, banishing it to a darker state where no hint of common sense or deep contemplation could be found. And, despite the rashness of the idea and the intense and non rewindable outcome, he was still planning to go through with it.
  They didn't need him anymore... No one would want him around after taking to heart his unstable being. It would be for the best if he just faded away... a perfect example of the certain whispers Keith was hearing in his mind, whispers from little devils bent on his destruction.
  He turned a corner, seeing his door clearly in sight. Before entering he made sure to check his surroundings to be certain that no one would have to witness the morbid display he was about to put on: the death of a rose.
  He made sure to close his door, leaning against it whilst catching his breath. He was panting like an old race dog despite barely even running to his room. Beads of nervous sweat dripped down his chin as he pushed himself forward, removing his armor and changing into his usual attire so there would be less layers for his knife to penetrate.
  He couldn't believe it, could barely even comprehend the thought that he was going through with such a morbid coping mechanism-if you would even call it that.
  Gripping his knife tightly as he removed it from its resting place in its sheath he proceeded to walk into his designated bathroom, not bothering to close the door since he was certain that no one would care enough to come find him.
  Falling to his knees he gripped his blade, quickly beginning to break down as tears ran down his cheeks.
  "This is for the best..." He told himself.
  
  Indeed many a minute passed, and yet Lance could not think of anything else but Keith. He had been gone for far too long for Lance's liking, therefore his suspicion grew as fast as his worry.
  Luckily he received an excuse to pursue his companion in the form of an annoyed comment from Allura.
  "Why isn't Keith back yet? We still need him for this discussion. Lance, could you please go find him?" She said with a specific sound to her voice that revealed her true level of annoyance.
  "Right." Was the simple and quick response that came from the Cuban Paladin, unusual for him considering he would usually flirt with the princess at any chance he got.
  Lance wasted no time in making his way to the docking bay where Keith said he would be checking his ship.
  To be quite frank, the former red paladin did somewhat expect to see Keith fixing the ship. Maybe perched atop a wing to fix some wires as best as he could. Some part of him was actually hoping he would catch him in some sort of funny transition from an awkward position under the ship to elsewhere simply so he could calm his nerves and still get a chuckle out of the situation. But alas, none of those hopes became real events.
  As soon as Lance entered the docking bay Keith was nowhere to be seen, making the usual fun-loving demeanor of him shift to a painfully worried and panicked mindset. His face grew pale as he looked around, hoping to at least see some hint of Keith's suit somewhere.
  "Keith? Where are you, buddy?" He called out nervously as he walked about-visibly shaken.
  No reply was to be heard.
  Immediately Lance began to run areas through his mind where Keith might have run off to. He wouldn't be training at this time, so maybe something happened? Did he hurt himself while fixing his ship? Was there an urgent need of his attention from the Blades or the Rebels? Either way the only place he would go would be to his room, either to fix a wound or contact a comrade. All things seemed to lead to Keith wondering off to his room, so that's where Lance discerned he needed to go.
  As if on autopilot he took off to Keith's room, speed walking to the best of his abilities (which wasn't hard, mind you, due to how long his legs were).
  Within mere minutes, two at least, he had arrived at the door of his rival-turned-companion (for the time being). The door was closed and frankly Lance had suspected it of being locked as it usually was. Yet when he pressed the button for entrance it let him in without an alarm or anything. Nothing was locked. Keith would ALWAYS lock his door, so why now was it open?
  Lance looked around, taking in everything about the room he was in since he never had the time to before. It was more bare than any of the other rooms he had been in, dull with barely any decor save for a few pictures here and there. The sight in and of itself was saddening to him the more he looked. Why was the room so bare? It's almost as if its owner never existed.
  He would have looked further, possibly into the deeper levels of snooping, if not for an irregular noise meeting his ears. The sound was of crying, sobbing that echoed from a voice whom it never had come from before.
  Lance was immediately drawn to the source as soon as he turned around, being met with a figure he never thought he'd ever see: Keith, curled up on the floor in a crying mess with a dagger close to his chest.
  It was as if some sort of alarm went off in the previously blue paladin's head as he rushed his way over to the door frame of the bathroom, slamming his hand on said frame unconsciously, receiving attention from a now silent Keith.
  They made eye contact, Lance with an expression closely resembling that of someone who just witnessed a murder, and Keith with an expression mixing of a deer-in-the-headlights and a depressed petrification.
  "What the quiznak were you doing!? Why do you have your knife so close to your... put it down now!" Lance yelped, taking a step forward only for Keith to slink further away as he kept the dagger pointed to his chest.
  "Why are you here..? Lance, for once in your life just leave me alone! You aren't the one making a serious decision." Keith retorted back with a snarl despite tears still being visible.
  "Leave you alone? Leave you alone!? After what it looks like you're about to do, no! No way! Now put the quiznaking dagger down!" Lance replied, not daring to take another step in fear that Keith might just decide to finish what he had started then and there.
  "What do you care anyway? You don't, no one does. Just leave me alone, and I won't get in your way ever again.." Came the reply, his voice cracking slightly from the tears he was holding back, standing up to try and give himself a little more stability with the help of his sink.
  "Listen to me, you idiot! I care! You don't understand how much you're needed here. So just put down your dumb dagger and talk to me!" Replied the now terrified Lance as he quickly grabbed Keith's wrist-the one without the dagger, making him flinch.
  "No, I watched how all of you treated me when I decided to join the Blades, how you scorned me. You went on without me even though I said I'd return, you didn't need me."
  "We thought you'd abandoned Voltron. We needed Voltron then, and I regret the fact that we didn't wait for you. You don't know how much I regret that day. But won't you listen to me for one second!?"
  "Yeah right, like you needed me... like you guys cared about my existence. I was just as invisible as those old monsters from fairytales. I won't just listen to you as you boss me around only for you to throw me out again..."
  "Keith, wait. Please listen to me.."
  "I'm sorry... it's for the best anyway... you guys don't need me anymore and-"
  "SHUT UP!" Lance screamed, cutting Keith off completely. "JUST SHUT YOUR FREAKING MOUTH AND LISTEN TO ME! It's not for the best, it never was or would be! We need you!"
  "For what? A bystander? A witness? You don't need me, no one does." Keith replied calmly, furrowing his brows to hide the fact that he was truly breaking down.
  "No! You're wrong, Keith! You're the best swordsman on this team, and your speed can't be beat. I...We need you! Having you around has supported everyone so much and you don't even realize how much you've changed everyone's lives. Shiro, Hunk, Pidge, Coran, Allura, and well... me especially. Without you our lives would be so much different. We were not trying to push you away when you joined the Blades, we just wanted you to make your own choice." Lance sobbed, visibly falling apart. He was unable to stop himself, the words kept flowing out as if they were a dam breaking. "You don't even realize how much you're loved here. We all care for you more than you could ever imagine. Heck, I would die if it meant saving you from the same fate. Keith, you mean the world to us, to me. I'll just come out and say it, scream it at the top of my lungs if I have to; I love you! I just couldn't get my dumb pride to back off from the rivalry we created to tell the truth. So don't tell me you aren't needed! I wouldn't be here and have stayed if it weren't for you! You're needed more than you know.... why can't you just get that through your thick skull!?"
  Everything went silent with only the sound of Lance's heavy breathing from his outburst. He was completely out of breath. There were so many things he wanted to say, yet he lacked the words to express them.
  His gaze was still locked tightly with Keith's, blurry due to tears but still strong. The grip he had on Keith's wrist remained secure as well, yet a bit softer than before. He was shaking just as much as Keith was, yet he didn't care. He couldn't lose Keith.
  Keith broke down crying, as he dropped to the floor in a broken heap once again. All he could do was deny everything Lance had said. Lance was a jokester wasn't he? How could he be serious about something like this..
  "Y-You're lying.... you're lying! There's no way any of that could be true! You're wrong, you don't care either way!" He sobbed, his head growing heavy but his grip growing tight on his knife. "Stop mocking me! Just leave if that's all you're going to do."
  Lance didn't hesitate to drop to his knees, finally gaining the courage to try yanking the knife from the hand of his broken companion. This resulted in a weak and short, twisted version of 'tug-of-war'. Although, since his crying had already made him weak, Keith lost despite his best efforts to keep his weapon. The previously blue Paladin threw the dagger behind him, as far away as he could get it before wrapping both arms tightly around Keith.
  "I'm not lying or joking. You are loved and needed, why can't you see that!?" He practically yelled, tightening his grip slightly.
  Keith couldn't speak. He was defeated and broken, shattered into a million tiny pieces within the safe and secure embrace of the one person he never thought he'd be close to. He was outwardly sobbing and shaking, finding a new item to grip tightly instead of his knife in the form of Lance's shirt.
  Neither of them could move, and neither dared or wanted to either. They just sat there in a big sobbing pile as they clung to each other for support.
  "It's going to get better... I want to help you, but you have to work with me, okay?" Lance finally asked, his voice slightly muffled by Keith's shoulder.
  "O...Okay." Came the quiet response.
  A hopeful smile couldn't help but spread gently across the sniffling sharpshooter's face as he hugged Keith close as he could in a manner so strong yet so delicate-almost as if any more pressure would cause him to shatter completely. He couldn't help but feel an overwhelming rush of happiness at just the one word Keith had spoken. He couldn't lose his swordsman, his comrade, his rose.
  "I don't care how long it takes, but I promise that I will help you pick up every last piece to put your life and heart back together. And even after that I promise I won't leave you... I'll care for you until the very end."

  Every fallen petal of a dying rose cannot be retrieved. But with care and love, new petals can be grown: stronger, bigger, and more beautiful than ever. For nothing can save a dying rose except for the undying love of one special person. Someone who is willing to care enough, even after the rose blooms again.

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