I tried to act normally. I didn't want to alarm Diane and I was pretty sure if I said anything that it would land Lilly in hot water for her words. I didn't know how to react with this newfound grief. The realization was new, but the event had occurred over a year ago.

I continued picking mushrooms and helping others ID ones they were unsure. I wasn't able to tease them or laugh or giggle like I usually did. I was sure that others noticed that I was out of sorts. I refused to help Lilly though. I was scared that I would start crying.

Lilly was still making her dislike of Diane known with her body language, although she hadn't actually said anything else. Brett was clearly not happy with Lilly and many of the other members didn't seem to approve of her earlier words either. When I refused to look at her or respond to her questions she had been forced by Brett to go to Diane for an answer.

Lilly had clearly hated every second she was near Diane, but Diane had been impressively calm and gave her the exact explanation that she had given others. Some days her tolerance and patience seemed to know no bounds. Perhaps she was setting an example.

It took them almost half an hour to get the bus started. We would have taken horses, but we had gone quite a long ways from the Fort. I was glad once we had everything unpacked, I really wanted to get away from Lilly.

Diane offered to take me to the playground, but I didn't feel like playing. My heart still hurt from what I had learned today. I wasn't coping well and didn't know where to start. I was trying to hide it though. When Diane went out for her run tonight I could cry. I just had to hold out until then.

Life with my parents had been nothing like what it was at the Fort. I had a desire for old comforts and had asked if we could go to the room with the exercise bike and read a book. She had agreed easily. I sat on her lap and handed her a book.

She blinked slowly at the cover, The Rescuer's Down Under, but didn't comment. My parents had always read me the Disney books and I hadn't even touched one since Diane had appeared. Diane started reading in soft clear voice. I let the story of the boy, two mice, and the giant eagle distract me.

We finished the story just in time for supper. The others at the table noticed I wasn't in my usual good mood and tried to cheer me up, but they had no way of knowing that it simply wasn't possible to cheer up someone who had just realized that their parents were zombies.

If I had gone downstairs in the house my mother would have tried to kill and eat me. I simply couldn't come to terms with it and it ate at me like a worm in an apple. Diane must have known that something was bothering me, but she didn't ask. She always let me decide when to bring up anything that was bugging me. I appreciated the silent attempt to give me some space.

Diane had occasionally needed some time alone after funerals to grieve, but I hadn't had a chance to be by myself yet. Normally I detested alone time and Diane had always stuck close or had someone else with me. This was the first time I actually wanted to be alone for a bit.

Rick came and I went off for more training. I really hoped that it would distract me. Diane went off for her usual practice with the other fighters.

I was so wrong that it was almost physically painful. Today we were practicing evading zombies in a house. Having to scout out and run and hide in a house from the Donovan zombie brought back memories from my own home when I had been blissfully unaware of the state of my mother.

It reminded every second that they were forever gone. If emotional pain gets bad enough, it can hurt physically. I tried to hide it, but must not have been succeeding that well since Rick kept trying to make really bad jokes to try and cheer me up. I was so sunken in misery that I could only stare blankly at his jokes. I couldn't even find humor in how red he had turned as his jokes fell flat on the floor.

I noticed Diane almost as soon as she entered the doorway and ran straight for her. "Diane!" I was desperately glad to see her. She was like my anchor in a hurricane and I really needed her right now. I wrapped my arms around her neck tightly, I simply couldn't let go as I buried my face in her neck. Diane seemed a bit startled, but in end she simply wrapped her arms around me and picked me up.

Rick and Donovan were silent as Diane turned and left the training room without saying a word. I didn't look up or loosen my grip the entire trip. Somehow Diane shifted me so she could hold me in one arm while she climbed the ladder to the treehouse. The trip here had been a blur.

Lilly's words haunted me in more than one way. I now knew my parents were gone, but what if Diane also turned into a zombie? I couldn't even tolerate the thought and pain it would cause.

Diane laid down on her bed as she held me against her chest. We were laying on our sides as Diane patiently waited for me to speak. Every time I went to try and speak my words simply failed me and I shook with my emotions. To say it aloud, to hear the answer, it would truly finalize my internal thoughts.

I eventually managed to look up into Diane's eyes, "My parents turned into zombies didn't they?" My voice was faint and shaking.

Her eyes filled with tears and darkened in sadness. She closed her eyes as two tears broke free. She lowered her forehead to press against mine in silent comfort. She said no words, but the answer was clear. Painfully clear.

I started sobbing and held on tighter to Diane. She tightened her grip on me as well, as if to reassure me that she wasn't about to disappear. She didn't speak, but her silent support and comfort were worth far more than any words could be. It took forever for me to cry myself out and drift off to sleep in her arms.

The distant morning bell roused me. I stirred groggily, my eyes felt oddly sticky and I was really warm. Overly warm. I realized that I wasn't in my bed and opened my eyes. Diane was still holding me and watching me with mostly closed eyes.

Her eyes were glowing strongly despite the morning light coming in the window. I had never had a chance to see her eyes up close when they were glowing. I could only see a small line as her eyes were mostly closed. I slowly reached out to gently touch her eyelids.

She closed her eyes as my fingers brushed her eyelashes and warm skin. I pulled back my hand and she opened her eyes, I could see their brilliant blue light. They were so pretty. I murmured sleepily, "Your eyes are so bright..."

It was odd that they were so bright when there was this much light in the room. Usually they didn't brighten like that unless it was completely dark or she was feeling a really strong emotion. I blinked as I noticed what looked like faint lines of pain in her face. The heat her body was giving off was incredible.

I was suddenly worried and reached out to test her forehead, "Your forehead is hot. Do you have a fever? Are you okay?"

I couldn't lose her. Especially not now. Diane gave a faint sigh and slowly sat up, "I just need to go for a short run, will you be okay here?"

I sat up as well while nodding in confusion, "Yes." How would a run make her feel better? Why was she in pain?

She nodded, obviously trying to hide the pain in her voice, "Why don't you go for a shower? I will be back shortly."

I watched her in silent concern. I had never seen her like this before. Her injuries had always healed swiftly and she had never been sick. She stood up stiffly and slowly as if she was in extreme pain. Her graceful and fluid walk was gone, replaced by a slow stilted shuffle. I followed her slowly and then went ahead to open the trapdoor for her since it was obviously her destination.

She climbed down slowly and I could hear her breath hitch in pain now and then. Thankfully there were no zombies in sight. She started walking towards the nearby treeline. I hoped she would come back and not simply just disappear.

I reluctantly gave up staring at the trees and went for the shower she had asked me to take. As I showered and got dressed I rolled her pain around in my mind. In the end, every dot I connected only came to one conclusion.

She had told me that she went out at night to run, otherwise her muscles would hurt. I had thought it was just a cover story, but it was obviously the truth. I hadn't realized just how badly inactivity could hurt her.

I just finished brushing my hair when the trapdoor opened. My eyes shot over to her, she looked like she normally did, although she was moving a bit more carefully as if her muscles were still sore. Her eyes were their normal brightness. I went over for a hug before looking up at her, "You stayed with me all night. That was why you were in pain."

She slowly nodded, "Yes, but it was worth it. I didn't want to leave you alone last night."

Her actions touched me. She would subject herself to terrible physical pain to help me through my emotional pain. Tears filled my eyes as I gave her another hug. I mumbled, "Thank you."

Diane pulled out an apple, it was slightly wrinkled and somewhat soft, but considering the Fort had run out of apples weeks ago, it was a small miracle. She used a knife to slice it up and we shared it before heading to the Fort for our real breakfast.