TW: mentions of political topics (as per canon in the movie), racism, brief Nazi mention, illegal immigrants, and misogyny. Read at your own discretion.

At some point during the party, Ransom went into Harlan's office. Max was relieved that she didn't have to look at that smug son of a bitch for a while. Now the Thrombeys were having their usual argument about politics. Richard and Joni were really getting into the argument while Walt and Alfred were sitting silently, just observing the drama going on. Renee was standing next to Donna, drinking her third martini. Marius had stepped out for a cigarette while Ralph was standing against the fireplace, watching the whole drama unfold. Max sighed in exasperation, rolling her eyes as she sipped her Cosmo. Marta stood in the doorway, listening in on the conversation in silent observation.

"I mean, don't like him because you just love him," Joni drawled dramatically.

"No. I don't like him, he's an asshole," Richard insisted. "But maybe an asshole is what we needed."

"Oh my God, yea," Joni laughed derisively. "An asshole is what we needed in 1930 whatever."

Max could not believe how stupid and ignorant some of the Thrombeys were. She remembered some of their conversations from every luncheon, get together, and party she had spent with the Thrombeys: they were often boring and irritating. And some of the things they said were just straight up disgusting.

"Oh here we go!" Walt remarked quietly. 

"Come on, Joni, those two things don't even conflate," Richard responded.

"There's the problem..." Joni said pointing a finger. "You do not care about anyone's feelings. Why don't you take off your red cap, Richard, and look around you? The streets are literally flooded with Nazis."

"No, no, no, no, no, no," Donna spoke up. "We are literally losing our way of life and our culture."

Oh sweet Jesus! Max thought, face palming.

"That's right!" Richard said, pointing to Donna.

"There are millions of Mexicans coming into our country," Donna said.

Renee just nodded as she sipped her martini, agreeing with Donna. Max was embarrassed that her mother could just agree with such narrow minded people.

"Oh my GOD!" Joni groaned.

"And don't make this a race thing. You always make this a race thing," Donna added.

"Yea, this is not a race thing," Joni snipped.

"I would say the same thing if there were European immigrants," Donna said.

"Oh yea? So if the Swiss were like, clogging in the streets..."

Max had to laugh at the stupidity of the Thrombeys as well. It was truly embarrassing.

"No. No, no, we allow them in," Donna said. "And they think they own what is ours." 

"Indeed," Renee said. "I mean, who do they think they are, these people who come here and just think they own everything?"

"Uh huh," Max said flatly. "How 'bout the Native Americans who were here first and our European ancestors pushed them off their land?"

"See? Max gets it! Thank YOU!" Joni said gesturing to Max. "I mean, they are putting children in cages!"

"I mean, nobody's saying that isn't bad. But the parents have some blame here." Richard reasoned.

"Oh, for what? Wanting a better life for their kids?" Joni argued. "Isn't that what America is..."

"For breaking the law!" Richard emphasized, cutting Joni off. "And I know you're gonna hate hearing this, America is for Americans."

"I hate to say this, Richard," Max said. "But pretty much all of us descended from Europeans who came to America during the Age of Exploration and Colonial times. And during the Industrial Revolution, Americans told European immigrants they wouldn't hire them, which included hanging signs in windows saying so."

"Well, European immigrants did it right," Richard argued. "They did it right."

"That still didn't change Americans' opinion about them," Max said. "The immigrants were still treated them like second class citizens."

Seeing that the Drysdale patriarch was losing the argument, he glanced around the room to get Marta in order to support his point.

"Where's Marta?" said Richard.

"Oh God, don't," Linda exclaimed in annoyance.

Marta was just about to leave the room when Richard called her name, gesturing to join them. Max stared in disbelief when the poor girl was forced to stand in the middle of the room, being put on the spot in regards of their debate. Marta reluctantly came into the room like a skittish deer.

"Marta, your family is from Uruguay, but you did it right," Richard said.

Max face palmed mentally; the fact that nobody knew where Marta's family was from was infuriating. And even if anyone did know, it was nobody's business. Marta didn't need this attention. Her big doe eyes stared at Richard, staying silent.

"I mean, what I'm saying is they did it legally," Richard continued. "She did it the right way. You work hard and you'll earn your share from the ground up. Just like Dad and like all the rest of us. And I'll bet you agree with me, right, Marta?"

Marta was silent, not sure how to answer the question and looked uncomfortable.

Max couldn't listen anymore. She remembered how Alfred had told his children about how his family had come from Europe with only a few dollars in their pocket. They worked hard in a butcher shop, barely making ends meet. Alfred decided he wouldn't be like them by being stuck in a dead end job making piss poor money. He worked very hard to get where he was today. He learned that money got you whatever you wanted and he intended to do that. He taught his sons that--and they were very rich and successful. But he never gave them a dime. They had to do this on their own. Max was taught she was worthless than her brothers because she was a girl. That she wouldn't amount to anything except getting married and making children. Max sought out to prove that she was very capable of anything--she would show that old man.

"Just leave the poor girl alone, Richard," Linda said.

"It's OK. I just wanna hear what she has to say," Richard insisted. "It's OK, Marta. You can speak."

"Oh sweetheart," said Joni. "Don't feel pressure to answer."

"If you want to become an American, there are legal ways to do it," Richard said. "If you break the law, it doesn't matter how good your heart is, you gotta face the consequences."

"Sure, but you don't realize how hard and expensive it is to earn a citizenship, Richie," Max said. "Not everyone has money in their pocket to pay for a lawyer and go through the whole process."

Richard shot a glare at the Drysdale heiress when she called him that horrible nickname. God! He couldn't stand it when she stood up to him and shut down his arguments. Before he could argue, they heard shouting coming from Harlan's office. It was barely audible as the door was closed--seemed like the only person who heard it was Jacob who was in the bathroom (but it seemed he heard only parts of the argument). They recognized the voices belonging to Ransom and Harlan. It was pretty clear that Ransom was angry about something. Marta took this opportunity to slip away while everyone was distracted. They heard the office door open and saw Ransom storming out.

Max went to see Marta to make sure she was OK. She felt bad for her. At least she could offer some sympathy. Hopefully her Dad hadn't hit on her either. Too often she had caught her own father flirting with Marta.

"Hey, Marta?" Max said.

"Oh...hello, Max," she said, looking up.

"How's your mother doing?"

"She's fine, thank you."

"You know, all that shit in there today," she said gesturing to the living room. "That the Thrombeys put you through and said—I'm sorry you had to go through that. That was really shitty of them."

Marta could only just nod her head silently. She was glad someone at least cared.

****

It wasn't fair! Harlan had told Ransom that he was cutting him out of his will along with the rest of the family. It was just not fair! He had the life--money, a house, a sweet ride, up to his thighs in women and membership at the country club. But now that he just found out that Harlan had cut him out of his will, he was pissed.

"You can't be serious!" Ransom yelled angrily.

"Not a red dime or word of my work to a single one of them, you included," Harlan said.

"You can't be that crazy. You're not just gonna throw away your fortune."

"No. I'm going to give it to Marta. All of it."

Ransom scoffed, shaking his head in disbelief at what he was hearing. His grandfather had to be insane.

"Your Brazilian nurse? Come ON! There's gotta be SOMETHING I can do to get my fair share, old man."

Harlan raised an eyebrow. When his grandson was a child, Harlan felt sorry for him because he was the black sheep of the family and his parents were such shits to him. Ransom always reminded Harlan of himself when he was a young man. They were pretty close as he would play GO with him. Yet he was such a spoiled asshole. His whole family were a bunch of spoiled and entitled assholes. Nobody deserved to inherit his hard earned wealth. He decided to stop supporting them financially. It was the first time he had made the best decision. Yet seeing Ransom beg that he would do anything was intriguing. Maybe he should give him a chance.

"If you're serious about this, Ransom, I'll consider putting you back in my will," Harlan said. "On two conditions--you must get a steady job and you must get married. And to make it easy for you, I have picked just the girl for you."

"Who?" Ransom said with a furrowed brow.

"Alfred Diamant's daughter."

Ransom's smug face fell, staring in disbelief. His grandfather had lost his goddamn mind! Married? Get a job? This had to be some sort of sick joke.

"Are you goddamn insane?!?" Ransom shouted.

"I'm sane for the first time in my life," Harlan said with a smile.

"Harlan, if you think gonna let this happen...if you think I'm gonna stand here and..."

"I've made the change to my will. It's done unless you follow my conditions--either you marry Max Diamant and get a job...or you get nothing."

"Hey! I'm warning you!" Ransom growled, jabbing a finger at Harlan.

The playboy stormed out of the office, feeling his blood boil. Ransom stood outside on the porch fuming. He got into his silver 1972 BMW and drove off. While he drove, he contemplated everything his grandfather had said. He had to get married--God! Married life was not for him! And not just to any girl--but the girl who hated him with a passion. The girl he bullied all his life. Maxine Diamant--that fiery redheaded heiress. This was really going to cut into his lifestyle. No more country club, no more women, no more money to spend as much as he wished. It was all over.

On the other hand, Harlan didn't say he had to be faithful. He could continue his usual lifestyle. The job thing was not going to be easy, but he was sure he'd figure something out. He never worked a day in his life. And this marriage wouldn't be real anyway--it was purely business. All he had to do was stay married and tolerate Max for however long Harlan wanted him to be married. Stopping his Beemer, he turned around and went back inside to Harlan's office, still finding the old man sitting there with a smug expression on his face.

"Back so soon, Ransom?" Harlan said with a toothy grin.

"Alright, old man," Ransom said. "I'll do it. But how long do I have to stay married to that Diamant bitch?"

"Don't talk about her like that!" Harlan warned angrily. "This is my best friend's daughter. And I know you tormented that poor girl ever since you two were kids."

"Sorry," Ransom apologized with a huff. "Now for how long?"

"One year," Harlan said. "But if neither of you wish to continue the marriage once the year is up, you can get divorced."

"Great."

"However, I have conditions while you two are married--you must remain faithful and treat her with respect. Any cheating or abuse during the marriage will result in you losing your inheritance permanently." 

Ransom scoffed, rolling his eyes in frustration. He should've known there was a catch. He was starting to hate this already--but maybe Max wouldn't care if he cheated. He had no intention of staying faithful to her.

"Now I know you two have had an animosity for years, but if you want her to agree to marry you, I'd give her a proper proposal," said Harlan.

"Am I allowed to tell her why I'm doing this?" he asked.

"If you wish," Harlan said with a shrug. "Oh and before you go, Ransom--I want you to give her this. It's your grandmother's engagement ring."

Harlan took a small velvet box out of the desk drawer, placing it in front of Ransom. The playboy opened the box, seeing an elaborate blue diamond surrounded by white diamonds. It was a beautiful ring. It had to be worth a fortune. There was no way Max would be able to resist this--but there was always that possibility.

"What if she says no?" he said.

"Just do what you always do," Harlan said with a mischievous grin. "You're a ladies' man. There's no way she could resist you. Your grandmother couldn't resist me when I proposed to her. Good luck."

Closing the box with a click, Ransom tucked the ring inside his pocket and headed out to look for Max. Would she even agree to marrying him? He would've done other things to get his cut from the will--but hell, this was an arranged marriage. They could live their lives as they wished. All they had to do was tolerate one another. But if Harlan found out either of them were unfaithful, he would risk losing his inheritance. No matter--if he didn't get caught, all would be fine. He would just have to be very careful.

He approached Max with caution. Hopefully he could come up with a proposal that would convince her to go along with this. He was a smooth talker with the ladies and they always fell for the Drysdale charm--but not Max Diamant. She was stubborn as a mule, her tongue was razor sharp, and add that to the fact that he had bullied her throughout their childhood so she had every right to hate him.

"Hey, Max," Ransom said.

The Diamant heiress turned her head, lowering of her Cosmo. She was less than pleased to see Ransom again. Her face scrunched up in disgust at the sight of him with a venomous glare.

"Ransom..." she responded with narrowed eyes.

"So...how are you doing?"

Max narrowed her eyes. Why would Ransom even be talking to her? All of her life, he tortured her and other times, he ignored her. If he did talk to her, he had an ulterior motive. She was no fool to his antics.

"What do you want?" she asked suspiciously.

"I just wanted to talk," he said sincerely.

"Bullshit."

"Is there a problem, little sis?" Marius asked.

Both of her brothers approached the scene as they could tell from afar that Ransom was bothering their little sister. They would do whatever it took to protect her from her tormentor. While they hadn't been around much to protect her when she was younger, they sure as hell were going to do so.

"Oh, hey Mary..." Ransom said with a laugh. "Ralphie."

"Why are you bothering my sister, Drysdale?" Marius said. "Haven't you put her through enough?"

"I wasn't," Ransom insisted. "We were just talking."

"Sure you were, Turdsdale," Ralph said.

Ransom set his teeth, feeling anger and humiliation boil up inside him. He had been called this horrible name since high school.

****
14-year-old Ransom was on the stage on the night of the school play. He had won the part of Romeo in the school play Romeo and Juliet. He got it because the girl he wanted to take to the homecoming dance had gotten the part of Juliet--Jessica Richards. She was a beautiful blond with blue eyes and one of the most popular girls at Dieu Le Veult Academy. Ransom ran with the popular crowd as well and they sat together.

As Ransom began to recite his lines for the balcony scene during the play, his stomach gurgled. He frowned, wondering what was going on.

"O Romeo, O Romeo," Jessica recited. "Where for out thou, Romeo? Deny thy father's name; Or if thou wilt not, but be sworn my love, and I'll no longer be called a Capulet."

He winced as he felt some pain in his stomach and...God! He had to hold it in so he wouldn't disgust Jessica. Hopefully it was just gas. All he had was his latte before he went on stage. God! Why did this have to happen today?

Clenching his teeth and sweating, Ransom said his lines in a strained voice.

"Shall I hear more, or shall I speak at this?"

Jessica continued to recite her lines about how Juliet spoke of how a rose by any other name would smell as sweet, but the feeling in Ransom's stomach got stronger and now it was starting to hurt more. Oh GOD! He was going to shit his pants! He had to hold it in!

Just as he was about to recite his lines, a loud fart ripped the silence and something wet spread in his pants. Jessica stopped and stared at Ransom with a disgusted face. Pretty soon the whole auditorium went dead silent for a few seconds. A foul stench of shit lingered in the air, making Jessica scrunch up her nose.

"Nice going, Turdsdale," Jessica said.

The whole auditorium burst into loud laughter at this name. Ransom went red in the face and ran off the stage, completely humiliated that he had just shit his pants in front of everyone during the school play. And what's worse, the girl he really liked was disgusted by him. He would forever live with that nickname in high school for the rest of his life.

***

Max gave a secret smile when she heard her older brother mock the man who had made her life miserable. What was even funnier was that Ransom didn't know she was responsible for him earning the nickname "Turdsdale".

"No, there's no problem, guys," Max said. "Until it showed up here."

"C'mon, Maxie!" Ransom said. "Can't we just talk for a few minutes? That's all I need."

Max cringed at the nickname. It was from a memory when at thirteen, she had gotten her period in the middle of science class and ended up staining her white shorts. Everyone laughed at her. Ransom made it worse by playing a horrible prank on her by stuffing her locker with tampons and sanitary napkins. When the feminine products spilled out of her locker, everyone laughed—Ransom laughed the hardest with his shit head preppy friends, calling her 'Maxie Pad'. It was then she decided to get back at Ransom for this cruel prank. With the help of her best friend, Helen Mansley, she grounded up some chocolate laxatives and calculated the amount to put in his latte and the timing all had to be perfect. He would shit his pants during the school play. It was the sweetest revenge she ever got on her bully.

"I don't want to talk to you," she said.

"Please," he pleaded, pouting his lower lip. "Pretty please with sugar on top."

Dammit! The way he pleaded made him look so damn handsome: those baby blues and the pout of his lower lip gave the spoiled playboy that sad puppy expression. She wasn't fooled though like most of the stupid bimbos he screwed that fell for the Drysdale charm. On the other hand, her more sadistic side seemed to enjoy the prick begging. Eventually she relented and decided to hear him out.

"Fine," she said, rolling her eyes. "You have three minutes."

Ransom lead Max into the library where the elaborate spider web display of knives stood by the window. He closed the door so they could talk in private. The redhead chose to stand near the knives display, staring daggers at the Drysdale playboy with crossed arms. Clearing his throat, Ransom tried to think how he could cut the tension. He had bullied this girl all his life--yet here she was standing there, waiting for him to say whatever was on his mind. That tall, gangly redhead he used to tease and play cruel jokes. Usually he was smooth with women, but why wasn't he around Max? His tongue was tied in knots. Clearing his throat, he began to speak to cut the tension.

"Um...well...to start, how are you?" he said.

"I'm fine," she said coolly. "Now what do you really want from me?"

"What makes you think that?"

"Don't play dumb, fuck stick. I know your games--you'd pretend to be nice to me and then you'd trick me. Now cut the bullshit and tell me what you want."

Ransom let out a very long exhale as he tried to think of an explanation of how he could persuade the Diamant heiress to go along with this plan. He had to choose his words wisely when proposing to her. He decided that he shouldn't tell her that her father and his grandfather basically conspired to arrange their marriage. She didn't need to know that.

"Right. Cutting the bullshit," he said with a nod. "I need your help."

Max raised her eyebrows, still keeping her arms crossed. Typical Ransom. Always needed something.

"Oh?" she said with a teasing lilt in her voice. "You...need my help?" Then changed her tone back to her venomous one, "Is this another one of your tricks, Hugh? Because I'm not falling for it."

Ransom set his teeth when he was called by his first name. Just the way she said his name was like poison. He remained stoic since he was very good at doing so.

"No tricks this time. I promise. It's Harlan...he just told me he's cutting me out of his will."

A ginger eyebrow arched. "Uh huh. So it's money. Well, forget it. I'm not giving you one cent."

"No. It's nothing like that, Max. I wouldn't ask you for a cent."

"Like hell you would."

"I promise you I won't. Now just hear me out, please," Ransom said exasperated.

A huff came from the redhead. It was pretty clear Ransom really had something on his mind.

"Go on," Max said.

"So Harlan said I could get my inheritance provided if I got married and got a job," he said.

"I see. So out of thousands of women you fuck every chance you get," she summarized, pointing a red painted fingernail in a circle. "Why did you pick me?"

"I figured since we grew up together as kids, I know you the best," Ransom replied with a shrug. "And you're not interested in money or having a permanent relationship--like most of the women I've been with--you were the perfect choice. If we get married, you will be very comfortable and..."

"No!" Max interrupted.

The very idea of being married to Ransom Drysdale, her bully who had tormented for all her life made her nauseous.

"What? Why?" Ransom said.

"Were you dropped on your fucking head as an infant, Hugh?" Max said. "I wouldn't marry you if you were the last man on earth."

"C'mon. It's just one thing you have to do for me. Please!"

"Why should I help you? This is all about what you want. And have you forgotten what you did to me?"

"We should move past that, Max. C'mon! Help me out here."

"Why should I? This is all about money--getting your share of your inheritance."

"Exactly! I'm telling you that this is just a business arrangement. You don't have to do anything. We just have to be married and I get my money. Everyone wins."

"And what do I benefit from it?" Max demanded.

"I'll make you very happy."

The redhead was intrigued. All those years of being bullied and harassed by this cocky asshole as a child. She could get her revenge--make this spoiled trust fund playboy pay for what he had done to her. She'd have him wrapped around her little finger. He needed her because Harlan was trying to teach him a lesson. She'd make him suffer in every way possible.

"How long do we have to stay married?" she questioned.

"Um...Harlan said about a year," Ransom answered. "And if you don't want to continue the marriage, you are free to go."

"Fine. I'll do it," she said.

The playboy could've leapt in the air, but he gave a 'yes' gesture, feeling elated and relieved that the redhaired heiress agreed to be his wife.

"Thank you, Max. I..."

"On a few conditions," she interrupted.

Ransom felt his ego deflate. Great. He should've know there would've been a catch.

"First, you have to remain absolutely faithful," she said. "No more gallivanting with various women whenever you want."

"Yea, yea. I know," Ransom said dismissive.

"Hey, if you want me to help you, then we are going to do this MY way," Max said. "Either you agree to my terms during this marriage OR I'll tell Harlan about everything."

"You wouldn't dare..." he seethed.

"Oh?" Max said with an impish smirk. "I know ALL about you, Hugh Drysdale--for example, I know you stole those expensive Bavarian chocolates from Harlan's study and blamed me for it. Or that time you broke his Ming vase and also blamed me for it. You smoking pot and cutting classes at prep school."

"You got no proof," Ransom sneered.

"Sure, but I have ways of getting it," Max threatened. "And believe me, your grandfather will take my word over yours. I know he will because..."

That devious little bitch! Ransom thought. If his inheritance wasn't at stake, he'd find another way of getting his cut. But he had to tolerate this uptight, spoiled princess for one year and then he'd get what he wanted. He wouldn't take a chance as he remembered that Max used to cry and run to Harlan about all the mean things Ransom would do to her--and of course, he took her side!

"Yea, I know." Ransom said cutting her off. "You used to tattle on me when we were children."

"Because you deserved it."

"Whatever. Let's just get this proposal over with."

Ransom reached inside his pocket. Max looked at the tiny box with narrowed eyes. An idea came to her head. All those years of Ransom humiliating her, she wanted to make sure that asshole suffered until he wished he was dead. Just as he was about to open the box, she stopped him.

"I have a better idea," she said in a sweet voice. "How about you propose to me in front of your family? I know how much they would love to see it."

Ransom froze just as he was about to open the box. God! She was going to make his life miserable. This marriage was such a bad idea. Devious little bitch.

"Fine," he said. "Let's go."