AN: Okay, prepare to have conflicting feelings for characters. And brace yourself for some revelations.

Warnings: Language, Childbirth, Angst, Mentions of Sex, Gaslighting (A Bit), Threats of Death, Manipulation, Threats, Deception, Mentions of Death, Mentions of Impending Death, Mentions of Abandonment, Guilt.

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*Levi's POV*

As if the pregnancy couldn't get any more distressing, the last stretch before her due date turned into time where he sat back and watched and tried to figure out what exactly he was supposed to say to this woman who wanted to keep her babies after everything that had happened. She'd already been through everyone telling her to give them up because she wasn't prepared and didn't have a stable enough lifestyle to provide for them and herself. Approaching with logic wasn't going to do anything to get through to her, even as he watched her struggle to figure out how to fit all the baby supplies in her small apartment, already making compromises in her budget for what supplies she got because she didn't have enough to support herself and two babies. She spent several days without power, canceled all the excess she could, started taking public transportation to save on gas money–so she could get clothes. So she could get them a few toys. So she could get at least one decent crib and high chair. So she could buy some more diapers. So she could baby proof the small apartment she lived in.

The last thing he wanted to do, especially at this point, seeing her work so damn hard to try and provide for them, seeing how determined she was despite all the odds stacked against her, was to hurt her more. To try and break down that spirit. But he knew what it meant for her and the babies if she kept them. It would be kinder in the long run to take them now, before they could develop any memories of her, before history repeated itself.

So he practiced what he would say. He chose his words carefully, chose them to cut and plant doubt, to deal blows and cripple defenses with harsh words and partial truths until she gave in.

Maybe the Infernal Court really had chosen this punishment to break him down and make him compromise his morals. A year ago he would never have dreamed he'd be in this position, planning and doing these kinds of things.

And now that her due date was upon them, Levi was suddenly faced with all kinds of harsh realities he'd either put off until now or hadn't realized until now.

He hadn't heard anything from the Infernal Court–what happened when the babies were born and his punishment was technically completed? Were they going to send another demon to take the babies? He doubted they wanted him influencing two future demons. What would the price be to keep them safe?

What about when they reached maturity? When their demon half started to overtake the human half and they needed to feed? He wanted to teach them the best way to make do, how to get by without hurting too many people, but would the Court stand for that? Would they try to intervene if Levi taught them how to be careful with their words so they didn't strike deals, if he straight up taught them not to make deals? Would the Court come for them, like they'd come for him?

More immediately...what would happen when Y/N finally saw him? After disappearing for the entire pregnancy, he doubted she'd be happy to see him, especially once he told her he came to take the babies. Was he going to be able to hold out when the time came?

Maybe he should have chosen The Pit instead of this Hell. Then again...at least something good came out of this one, even if fate ended up making it short lived. The other fate would have been pure suffering and eventual emptiness.

Still, while Y/N was making preparations for the birth, Levi was making his own–as much as he could while also keeping a sharp eye on Y/N in these last few critical days. He was not about to let his guard down just because they were so close and let another attempt at sabotage slip through the cracks.

And finally, at long last, it happened.

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*Reader's POV*

Considering you were a single mother and pretty much on your own during your pregnancy, one of the few things that had been observed and obsessed over and drilled into your mind was what to do when you went into labor: how to recognize you were going into labor, when to head to the hospital, how to get to the hospital, and a detailed plan for what would happen at the hospital before, during, and after the birth.

Considering you had to know all of this yourself, you paid an intense amount of attention to your body, every little contraction, the movements of your babies moving around in your belly. As such, you noticed when the early labor contractions seemed to start up, and when the babies moved noticeably lower in your belly. After sending a quick text to Dr. Salazar and a warning text to the friend that was supposed to act as your driver when you went into labor, you started walking around the apartment, taking calming breaths, trying to stay as relaxed as possible, timing the contractions, and also making sure last minute your to go hospital bag was ready and had everything in it, sitting expectantly by the door. You always kept a hand on your belly, feeling around lightly for the babies, as if the touch could help you glean what was going on down there.

The contractions didn't feel better after the walk. They were getting steadily more frequent and more painful, moving in position from back to front...this wasn't false labor, you were going into true, active labor. You sent a text to Dr. Salazar, and grabbed the to go bag by the door as you called your friend, trying to stay calm physically as you pressured your friend to hurry up and get over here because it was the real thing, not some preparation drill or false alarm.

You let out a whimper as a particularly painful contraction hit, the wound ending in a low groan as you doubled over as much as you could with your pregnant belly. Now would have been a wonderful time for the man who impregnated you to have been a part of this–it would have been a hell of a lot more convenient to just have the baby daddy take you to the hospital instead of having to depend on a friend to show up on time and get you to the hospital on time.

Unfortunately, he'd decided to disappear.

You were never going to get over the bitterness and loneliness you felt from his absence, despite the entire mess of a situation. His absence was part of what made it so bad, what made it so painful, what made it so much worse.

No, no, no, now was not the time to be focused on that, you were in active labor.

Your friend showed up just before you considered calling some poor Uber driver to get you to a hospital, taking the bag from your hand and helping you into the back seat where you could sprawl and relax while they threw the bag into the trunk with a thousand apologies for being late, something about a delayed message and falling asleep because it was late at night. You waved the apologies off, honestly uncaring and just wanting to get to the hospital. You didn't know how fast the babies would come. You'd googled all kinds of things, but really, it all depended on the babies and the mother and there were so many differing factors it was too much for your brain to really process at the moment.

You were pretty sure your friend broke some traffic laws to try and make it up to you, but it just resulted in you snapping at them in some "My contractions are very painful right now" grumpiness to take it easy, because every bump was one you felt and it did not help.

After a while, the entire process started to become a blur. The pain was more than just distracting, considering two little human beings were trying to push their way out of you–your lost triplet had, in fact, been absorbed like the doctor said might happen, as was the case with a Vanishing Twin Syndrome. So yes, there were only two babies coming out.

Which also meant longer labor, and two deliveries.

Words and instructions were barely registering in your mind once your friend got you to the hospital and into the maternity ward, where you were passed off to the nurses standing by and ready to get you settled in for the process ahead of you. You managed to answer questions about the contractions, as well as confirm it would only be you–no father present, no family member with you, the friend was actually going home after this–as you were examined by the nurses for vitals and the general progression of your labor before being moved into a delivery room.

They helped you get comfortable, and you heard the word fast mentioned once or twice. So the twins were in a hurry to come out, were they? You'd been under the impression that you could walk around, take a nice hot bath, that you'd be here for a while as they monitored you and waited for the more immediate, the baby is coming out now kind of labor. But it felt like they were checking things rather fast, and as you wiped some sweat away from your forehead, one of the nurses was already asking you if you wanted pain meds during the delivery.

Which was something you'd decided on ahead of time. Hell yes you wanted pain medication, you were about to give birth to twins for your first pregnancy. Maybe you'd be lucky and it would numb some of the emotional pain of going through this moment alone, as well.

Yes, you understood that wasn't how these pain meds worked. You could still wish, though.

And yet it was still a good couple of hours of the contractions growing more and more painful and frequent before you were finally told that you were fully dilated and you could start pushing. Your heart raced, hit with the realization that it was here, that they were about to be here.

Dr. Salazar was here now, and you were helped into position, the nurses walking you through your breathing exercises before they finally started telling you to push.

Your hands gripped at the bars as you pushed, surprised by the amount of pain and the effort, but trying nonetheless, glad when you saw the pain meds going into the IV you were hooked up to, a grunted scream filling in the air.

"Good, very good, now breathe and do it again," Dr. Salazar encouraged you as you sucked in breaths, trying to keep it at the pace and depth you'd been taught before you pushed again, letting out another loud scream.

The cycle continued, your grip on the bars bars making your knuckles go white as tears started to stream down your face. You were saying things, but you weren't entirely aware of what was coming out of your mouth. At some point, a hand pulled one of yours away from the bars and held to it tightly and firmly, giving you a but of human touch and reassurance to hold to instead of just cold metal.

You were exhausted and drained when you finally made the push that brought the first baby out, a cry rending the air as you fell back against the hospital bed, whimpering softly and breathing heavily while the doctors and nurses checked the health of the first baby.

"Your baby girl's here. So far everything looks healthy and normal. Now we just need to get her brother out here."

"I don't think I have another round in me," you said breathlessly, eyes cracking open to look bleary at the figure of whoever it was holding your hand without actually seeing them as they gave your hand a tight squeeze.

"You have a few minutes to recover, darling, use that time to breathe and rest while we make sure your boy's in the proper place and ready to come out. He should come out faster now that his sister has paved the way, too."

You did as you were instructed, taking the brief break between pushing through deliveries to try and breathe and reorient yourself, Dr. Salazar checking on the ultrasound to see if he was getting into the correct position and that everything was progressing as it was supposed to.

Another painful contraction hit, and you could have sworn you felt him pushing on his own to come out.

"All right, here we go, last round, okay? And then it's over," Dr. Salazar said, getting back into position while the grip on your hand adjusted in preparation. "Ready? Breathe...breathe...all right, push!"

Your scream rang out loud and long through the room, ending in a groan as you tried your hardest to just get it over with, body exhausted from pushing one tiny human being out of you and reluctant to go through it a second time so soon. So close, though. You knew a nurse was standing by with your little girl, with the baby all cleaned and checked and waiting for her mother to be done with her delivery for the much needed skin to skin contact. You just needed to get through this last part and your twins would be here in the world, in your arms...

"Push!"

You let out another scream, one of the nurses flinching with how loud it was in their ear.

"He's coming out, come on, just a few more pushes, one, two, three, push!"

You threw your head back, tears in your eyes, the hand holding yours turning into an encapsulated grip as both hands covered yours. Breathe, breathe, breathe...

What felt like an eternity later, but in a space of time much shorter than when your daughter was born, you finally heard the second cry fill the air and you wilted back against the bed in relief, the hands holding yours disappearing as you caught your breath, weary and registering that it was finally over.

One of the nurses gently touched your shoulder to get your attention.

"I'm going to help get you ready for skin to skin with your twins, okay?" she said softly, and you nodded, letting her help you partially disrobe so that the twins could be laid down on your bare chest.

Your eyes focused back on the scene in front of you as the nurse with your newborn daughter stepped closer, gently placing the small girl against your skin a little to the left so there was still room for your son, who they were still quickly cleaning and checking to make sure he was healthy.

She was so tiny, her eyes still closed to the world, hair dark like her father's and still plastered against her head. She was squirming slightly against your skin, adjusting to the change positively, her cries starting to calm down as she lay there against your skin and seemed to recognize she was lying against her mother. Your hand had come up to gently cradle the back of her head with your arm lying against her back for further support. It was surreal, staring down at the little girl and knowing that she was yours, she came from you, and she knew you so well she knew by mere touch that you were her mother. You hadn't even tried to speak yet, your voice leaving you as tears pricked in your eyes and a lump formed in your throat. She was so small, and precious, and...

"There we go," said the nurse who had been handling your little boy, coming over to gently lay him facing his sister on your chest, both twins now lying snuggly against you as a soft blanket was wrapped around them to keep you covered and decent and to keep all three of you warm.

He was tiny as well, the hair atop his head a little lighter, as if it was deciding if it would commit to your hair color or Levi's, his little fists resting against your skin and bumping against his sister's arm with the occasional twitch. Your thumb gently stroked along the back of his head as you watched him, feeling those tears that had been gathering in your eyes start to slip free.

Small, precious, warm, and worth every minute.

You had to crane your neck a little uncomfortably, but you reached down to gently kiss the top of both of their heads, eyes closed as you let the reality that you were holding your babies in your arms crash over you.

The nurses had pulled the mobile baby bassinets beside your bed for when you were ready to put them down, making sure both bassinets were flush against the hospital bed and within reach. The nurses were leaving, Dr. Salazar staying inside to talk to you for a few more minutes and just to observe you and make sure everything was going smoothly.

"Everything's arranged for you to room in with your babies until you're ready to go home," she said gently. "You remember what we said about these first few hours? Keep them against your chest for at least an hour to help them adjust and let your body adjust as well, let them find your breast on their own and don't force a breastfeed, it may only make them upset. They will be awake and alert for the first two hours, keep them with you for that time, but when they're sleepy, put them in the cribs so all three of you can get a proper and safe rest. All three of you are adjusting. There's a call button right here beside the bed so you can reach it easily if you need help from one of the nurses, who will be right outside if something happens, all right?"

You nodded, eyes still trained on the babies curled against your chest. Your baby boy was squinting, eyes not yet fully opened but he was clearly getting there. Your daughter's eyes, however, were fully open, staring intensely at the skin in front of her with her little fingers stretching and lightly touching the smooth skin it was laying against.

"We have a do not disturb sign on your door so that no one will bother you while you spend time bonding with your babies, all right? Congratulations. Get some rest when you can," she said warmly, getting up to leave you alone with your newborn twins.

You let out a slow, shaky breath as you were finally left alone with your two newborn babies, staring at them in open wonder, relaxing at the feel of having them pressed against your chest to let you both get acquainted with one another in the new environment.

There were so many thoughts swirling in your head right now. For one, the sharp echoes of grief at the reminder there should have been three today, if your third hadn't passed early on in the pregnancy. The other was a wonder at how alike to their father they were–clearly your daughter might echo some of Levi's appearance, judging off the darker hair color alone, but besides that they looked like normal babies. Any fear about them coming out with a little tail or golden eyes melted away as ridiculous paranoia, quickly being overwhelmed by the motherly love settling in now that your babies were real and here in the world with you. The two you ended up doing this for, the two you ended up enduring it all for. Your babies. Their father wasn't here, he'd left at the very start, so you were going to step up and try to give them all the love they should have had. You wanted them to be safe and happy and healthy, and that started today.

Your boy seemed pretty content to just lay against your chest and stare at you for the time being, though his twin was starting to root around, and you lay still, letting her slowly find her way down to your breast to start trying to get something to eat. Her little mouth latched on surprisingly strongly, and the resulting sensation was...strange. Not at all what you expected. There was even a little tingle in your spine, a slight breathlessness, though you couldn't figure out why. Still, she was eating, and that was what was important. Honestly, that happened a lot faster than you'd expected.

Your baby boy seemed to just want to lie with you for a while, though, and you gazed at him as his eyes opened more and more, able to feel his heartbeat against your skin, the in and out of his tiny lungs taking each breath...

You let your little girl feed at her own discretion, pleased when your boy eventually followed suit. They stayed awake for some time after that, eyes looking around at more than just you, though they stayed curled up and close to you the entire time, snug and warm in your arms lying against your chest.

When they started to nod off, though, you shifted, much to everyone's chagrin, getting a bit of complaint from both babies as you called in a nurse to help you get them ready to be swaddled and put in the bassinets next to your bed. She did a few more routine things first–measuring and weighing, as well as a Vitamin K injection for each, before she pulled out the blankets and the now-grumpy twins were put into diapers and swaddled. Once they were warmly wrapped in the white blankets with the blue and pink stripes, they were placed lying down on their backs in the cribs to sleep.

Still feeling the exhaustion of the delivery, you laid down on your side so you could face them, falling asleep quickly after they'd been taken care of. You knew you were only likely to get about six hours, but that was six hours of sleep to help you recover from the strenuous delivery.

The pregnancy was over. You were officially stepping into the terrifying waters of what you were going to do now that you had two newborn babies to take care of with no outside support. You still had a few weeks left for your maternity leave pay, but if you didn't find a way to return to work by then...

You didn't want to worry about that right now. Right now, you were just glad to have them with you, that you'd actually managed to make it here, even though it had been all on your own.

With a soft sigh, you fell asleep with a slight smile on your face, relief helping coax you to sleep before the uncertainty could return and try and keep you awake.

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*Levi's POV*

After Y/N fell asleep, he finally had a chance to have some proper contact with his babies. Nearly, mostly, sort of. He didn't want to wake them up, so for now, he was settling with standing by the bassinets and touching them very, very gently so he didn't accidentally wake them up. His hand still hurt from where Y/N had practically crushed it while she was in labor, but he ignored it in favor of paying attention to the babies in front of him. The little boy stirred slightly at Levi's touch, but otherwise they didn't react, fast asleep since he was staying extra careful not to disturb them.

They were so tiny...and soft. A little puffy looking in the face right now, and their heads seemed a tiny bit oddly shaped, but yet...they were more observations, not complaints. They were still his babies, and he felt his heart warming at the sight of them sleeping so comfortably in their bassinets, the two warm and content and well-fed.

A slight shiver went down his spine.

It had taken more than he cared to admit not to appear suddenly and stop her from breastfeeding them, especially because he knew that was something essential to the first twenty-four hours. But she didn't know what it would do, she didn't know she had to be conscious of every small decision.

Anxiety pooled in his gut, throat closing as he realized the moment was upon him, where he'd have to hurt her again for her own good, in the hopes that maybe, just maybe, he could convince her to let him take the babies now.

After watching her hold them for a good few hours, though, he doubted he would be able to convince her to give them up. He still had to try, for everyone's sakes, even if it hurt her even deeper than it had before, even if he scared her. He would deal with the repercussions if he wasn't successful and take responsibility for it, though. But first, he had to try.

He stared down at the two fragile babies in the bassinets, so new to the world and untainted by loss and pain and cruelty, not-yet haunted by their nature, and his heart throbbed painfully.

I don't want them to have to live with the same guilt I do. I don't want history repeating itself. I want to keep them safe as much as possible, give them as much of a happy life as I can for as long as I can.

"...hmm...Dr. Salazar? Is it already time to check up on them, they're still asleep..."

Levi froze, gaze lifting to the woman on the bed with his hand still gently resting atop his son's head, watching as she slowly came to awareness when there was no reply but the feeling of another person in the room persisted, and she opened her tired eyes to see Levi standing on the other side of the bassinets.

She sat up sharply, eyes fogging over as the sudden movement must have jostled her tired and worn out body, though her eyes were wide and her lips were parted to let a strangled gasp escape, staring at him in a mix of shock and terror.

Here came the reaction he'd been anticipating from the very beginning.

"What the hell are you doing here?" she gasped, loud enough that the babies stirred, and Levi lifted a finger to his lips to tell her to lower her voice, straightening up and moving away from the bassinets.

She relaxed slightly as he moved away from the babies and started walking to the other side of the bed, as if she'd been afraid he was going to harm them.

That cut right to his core, but he didn't let it show, slamming up that wall of indifference between them as he braced himself for what he was going to have to do.

"Keep your voice down. They need their rest," he said in a much quieter voice than her, coming to a stop on her side of the bed. As he did, she got out of bed on shaking legs, and it took more of his self control not to show a flash of concern as the thought crossed his mind she should really be staying in the bed.

Instead, she staggered towards him on those unsteady legs of hers, and instead of speaking, she smacked him hard enough across the face the sound was loud and audible in the silence, his skin red and stinging. Apparently his lip split slightly, too, because he briefly tasted blood before the minor wound healed.

After the first hit, they kept coming. Not slaps, specifically, just wild hits, fists against his chest, once clipping his chin, a couple shoves. Levi stood there and took it in silence, letting her let out the well-deserved rage on him as she thrashed at him without getting so much as a flinch from him, just stoic silence.

She, on the other hand, was breathing heavily, the sound only getting more labored the more she exerted herself, fragments of insults and angry sentences slipping through between the hits and her labored breathing.

"You bastard! You don't get to...you disappear for months and now you show up? You have no right, you fucking, son of a bitch! Asshole! Cunt! Cad! Blackguard! Lecherous, disgusting, piece of pig shit–!"

Well, for a moment there she'd been pulling words from the dictionary before going back to spewing whatever came to mind. He was half tempted to believe she might have searched those words so she could curse him with them later.

It wasn't an unexpected rage, though–he'd expected this from her, wanted it from her, which was why he just took the insults and hits in silence. He wanted her to scream and yell and curse and hit him for what he did, to hate him, and he was getting it. Mostly. She couldn't scream and yell because the babies were asleep, but she could still curse and hit him.

Until her strength gave out.

Mid curse, her legs gave out underneath her, her strained body unable to hold up her weight anymore between the labor she'd just been in and all the strength she just expended beating on and cursing him. Instinctively, he reached out to grab her arm before she could fall, lifting her back onto the edge of the bed before she was in his grip for more than ten seconds, though at least by now she knew he was solid and real and not some strange hallucination.

She stayed hunched over on the bed, catching her breath and refusing to look at him, trembling more from rage than exhaustion. Though it was at that moment he realized she was crying as well, and not just tears of rage. Likely tears of hurt, of abandonment, of loneliness coming to a head, since he showed up now after her struggle.

"Why are you here...Why now, of all times?" she asked bitterly.

Levi stared at her evenly, waiting until she looked up at him to speak. "I came for them."

Her eyes went wide, going still for a moment as she stared at him, before her shock gave way to anger–not panic, anger and ferocity, a mother bear protecting her babies as she subconsciously shifted closer to them.

"There's no way in hell you're taking them from me."

"They were never yours to begin with. You didn't even want them. I tricked you into getting pregnant, remember? Don't act like you planned it," Levi said scathingly, starting to pull out some of the carefully crafted sentences he'd been bracing himself to say.

She bristled, lashing out to hide how his words cut her. "You dare think you get to disappear for the whole pregnancy and then have any sort of claim on my babies?"

"They're my babies, too."

"No they're not," she said venomously. "You gave up that right when you disappeared for the whole pregnancy. You do not get to waltz in here and take them from me after what I went through for them."

"Yes I do, and do you want to know why? You don't know the first thing about what you gave birth to today," Levi said coldly, coming closer and sitting on the edge of the bed beside her, gaze boring relentlessly into her eyes and ignoring how she scooted away from him.

"I don't need to know anything other than they're mine," she said with a stubborn set to her jaw, but he could see a flash of those insecurities in her eyes that made him pounce like a shark that had smelled blood.

"That's where you're wrong. Because what you gave birth to isn't even human–they just look that way to blend in, and in the future make them more appealing to your kind. You just carried demon spawn to full term," Levi told her harshly, officially confirming a thought that must have entered her mind at some point.

"I don't ca–" she started to say, a waver in her voice as her hands shook against the top of the sheets at his revelation.

Levi cut her off sharply, partially to stop her from saying something that could damn her and try to protect her from her own ignorance, but also to continue pressing that image of a callous individual who did not care at all for her wellbeing or whether she could even take this news.

"Careful what you're about to say. If demons are real, that means so are the other parts of those religious tales–and you've already fornicated with one, made deals with one. I'd watch your words if I were you. You wouldn't want to make your situation any worse than it already is."

"I'm not going to let you scare me into changing my mind," she said, but the tone of her voice didn't match her words. She sounded fragile and shaken, like one little push would knock her over.

"Then let me paint you a picture," Levi said steadily, leaning in and forcing her to lean back until she couldn't go any further, back pressed against the headboard of the bed, pinning her in place.

"Let's say you keep them. You might get a year or two you can delude yourself into thinking they're just like any other babies. You work double shifts, hire a cheap nanny, or ship them off to a daycare service most of the day. You run yourself into the ground trying to care for two kids on your own, you end up gone when they're awake and briefly home while they're asleep trying to care for them, no support. And then you start to notice the difference. You're not there enough to confirm it but it's almost like there's something important missing. You start having to switch caretakers because no one will stay, something keeps scaring them away. You start doubting yourself, doubting despite all your stubbornness that you made the right decision. And you start to realize that all this time and effort and love you keep trying to put into these children just...isn't being reciprocated. Because it's in their nature. They can't return it, they won't ever care. The fact that you're their mother doesn't change anything for them. They'll just drain everything from you, until all that's left to take from you is your life. And one day they'll take that too. Without it ever bothering them, they'll send you to an early grave themselves. And of course I'll be there to take them anyway. All that struggling, simply for children that will never love you in return because they're incapable of it, and an early death with a wasted life, giving everything for nothing in return."

How sick was it that this was the most he'd ever said to her? This cruel and blatant lie, a monologue he'd been practicing for this very moment to make it convincing, was the most he'd ever spoken to her, and it was in an attempt to break her grip on the twins in the only way he could think of. Scaring her off, making her believe that it was the worst thing for her, trying to emphasize a nature that honestly didn't exist.

Yes, they were half demon, but that didn't mean they didn't have hearts and feelings, a natural pull to their mother and father, that they were incapable of caring for something or someone. If anything, they would be attached to their mother, clinging to her wherever they went, possibly able to sense that their time with her would be limited.

Levi had always known. Deep down, something told him that his mother wouldn't be with him long. He wanted to spare them all the pain that would inevitably come, and he was hoping a clean break now would save them from the guilt and trauma and pain that came if they stayed.

In front of him, Y/N was finally looking at him like the demon he was, horrified and repulsed with how easily he spoke of such a thing, his gaze unwavering from hers with every word that was carefully crafted with the intent to twist a blade into her heart. Just another reason for her to hate him, to lash out. But he would rather she hate him for eternity, he would bear the brunt of all this guilt and self-loathing he was inflicting upon himself, if only to spare her and the twins what pain he could, while he could. He'd be their sacrifice–he'd already done too much to have any chance of being redeemable. His twins were still pure though, and they still had a fighting chance if he was willing to do whatever it took to protect them. And Y/N...he might have partially damned her already, but from the very start, he'd been trying to make sure she still had an out, that she could still be saved despite what he'd done to her. If there was even a chance...

Right now, however, with that look on her face and the silent tears slipping down her face at the false image he gave her in her mind of what supposedly awaited her in her future if she kept the twins...he knew he was pretty much stabbing her in the heart, but that look felt like he was falling on his own blade in the process. It cut and burned, it almost made him choke on his words and back out of this cruel charade, this caricature he presented of the sickening demon to the core he could have been, well aware of how vile he seemed right now, how manipulative and cold-hearted, sleazy, even, but he ruthlessly pushed aside the doubt and tried to push it just a little further. Before she could second guess what he said, before she could doubt and suspect that it was a lie, he gave her a tantalizing offer.

"Shh, it's all right, though. It doesn't have to be that way," he said suddenly in a voice dripping with honey, a hand raising to gently brush the side of her cheeks with his thumb swiping away tears. She flinched away from his touch, but he didn't draw his hand away, taking the sudden stillness from her as a chance to wipe the tears on both cheeks away before his thumb and forefinger grasped her chin in a gentle but firm grip, making sure she looked directly at him so he could add the force of his suggestion powers to the offer he made her, to push her hopefully that last inch to get her to give in and choose this second option.

"I have certain gifts with the human mind–especially one that's let me in before. I can simply...make this all go away. Turn it into nothing more than a bad dream. The three of us will disappear, and I can ease any lingering pain so that it's nothing more than a faint itch in the back of your mind that always eludes you. All the pain, all the suffering you've endured and could endure, I'll make all of it go away. I can tell you to break out of the life you've been leading so far, and after we disappear, you go and you live out the rest of your life, however long it may be, to the fullest. You find someone that makes you happy, new friends who support you, you make every second count. Maybe even settle down and attempt a proper, healthy family, if that's something you want. All of this pain, the children and lover who never cared for you, it will all go away, and you can choose to be happy again. Isn't that something you want?" Levi finished, hand threading tantalizingly into her hair, still laying that suggestion power on thick to get her to take his offer.

He wanted to take all the pain she'd been suffering because of him away. He wanted to make it all disappear, and make sure that after this, whatever time she had left with how much they'd taken from her was time she spent living to the fullest, so she wouldn't have regrets. She deserved as much, and he was hoping she would take him up on the offer–that was why he was pushing her so hard. Plus, if he took them now, she might have a bit more time to live that she wouldn't have if they stayed with her.

After a few moments where he let her soak in his proposal, he felt like his suggestion had started to land...but then something...shifted, and it didn't feel quite right to him. Usually these things happened so naturally it was almost seamless in how smoothly his will flowed into another person and became action. Other times, it might be more of a slow drip, but he could feel the added weight as his sugared words settled into the water and dissolved into the other's will.

This...this felt like a boot that was sinking into mud, but the foot was slipping out as it pulled to get free.

She stared at him blankly, a hollow look in her eyes–it wasn't all consuming, but something had been gouged from her after his little speech. He could only hope it was the right thing, considering how off his suggestion felt right now.

"This was what you wanted all along, wasn't it?" she asked in a dead tone. "Get me pregnant, disappear, then swoop in after the birth to take them for yourself?"

Levi let his hand fall away, gaze still unwavering from hers. "It was."

"So, what...I was just a baby maker to your fucked up mind?"

"Yes," he lied in a blatant and blunt tone.

Smack. Right across the face, hard enough to draw blood again.

"Fuck you," she hissed as Levi dabbed at his lip, staring at the tiny smear of black ichor left behind after her slap with the tiny wound already disappearing without a trace.

Even though he deserved it, he was getting a little tired of all the slaps.

"I take that as a no?" he said icily.

"You'll take my children over my dead body," was her harsh answer, and Levi saw the perfect opportunity for his last attempt to try and shake the children loose from her grip. He didn't want to do it, he hated to do it, it was so...opposite of who he was. But it was his last chance to convince her, and he had to try.

He'd been telling himself that a lot recently. He had to try. How much further would he dig this hole he was in with that damn saying?

Levi's eyes flashed, and even Y/N tensed, sensing that she'd misstepped somehow in her words and that there was now a sense of danger in the air around them.

"That could be arranged," he said dangerously, and before she could react to his thinly veiled threat, his hand was around her throat, eyes flashing black and gold as he pushed her back onto the hospital bed, hovering over her slightly as his fingers started to apply a bit of pressure. "After all, I'd only be speeding up the process."

He wouldn't kill her. The thought had never crossed his mind to do so–purposely, outside of the unfortunate side effects of the pregnancy and fraternization with him–and it never would. But she didn't know that, she didn't know that it was an empty threat. As far as she knew, he was the heartless and cruel demon who'd purposely got her pregnant and was now here for the children without any care of what this had done to her. He had no reason to hold back on killing her to get what he wanted, from what she knew of him.

Inside, he recoiled from himself at the thought of what he was doing, threatening to kill a woman who'd just given birth to his children. Empty threat or not, it was a new low, one he'd never imagined himself sinking to.

They stared at each other for several tense, painfully long moments, Levi trying to see if she would back down at long last, Y/N staring up at him with wide eyes filled with terror.

But then something...clicked, behind her eyes. And the terror turned to confusion, then some kind of befuddled realization, though there was still fear in her gaze as well.

"You're bluffing. I don't know why, but you are," she said, stating it as a fact, not a question. Levi leaned back marginally, surprised that she'd been able to pick up on that fact. "If killing me was an option for you, and you were the soulless demon you claim you and the twins are, you would have just killed me to start or taken them while I was asleep. You wouldn't be trying so damn hard to convince me to give them up."

"That's a risky thing to choose to believe right now," Levi said, applying more pressure so it would become difficult for her to breathe, a last ditch effort to scare her into giving them up.

"You won't do it. You would have by now," she said simply, though the words themselves were difficult to get up.

Levi studied her expression, and at long last, defeat and despair both started to settle into his heart. He couldn't give in, he couldn't. If he gave in, he might as well declare her dead now, because it wouldn't be much longer before she was. He knew how this ended, and he couldn't allow it to come to that.

But what other choice did he have? The only other thing he could do would be to take the twins by force, and that would probably kill her faster than the presence of the twins in her life.

Levi's fingers eased up around her throat, his eyes studying her from behind a calculating mask. "No matter what I say or do, you won't give them up?"

"No."

"Even if you could have a much better life without them?"

"Doesn't matter. I want to be there for them, even if what you said is true. Nurture does matter, not just nature. I'm no abandoning my babies "

The stare off continued for a few more seconds, and Levi's fingers went lax, slipping away from her in dejection as he got off the bed and walked a few steps away, turning his back to her with eyes closing and heart beating painfully in his chest.

He'd sworn he wouldn't father any child that would then be forced to go through the same pain he'd gone through, yet here he was, watching it all unfold. He was standing in a room with a dead woman who wouldn't know what he'd been trying so damn hard to protect her from until it was too late.

I killed my own mother. Whether it was unintentional or on purpose doesn't matter, it's still my fault. My very existence was a death sentence for her, her love for me the tool to carry it out. I didn't want my children to have the pain of that knowledge, that experience. Especially with a mother that truly loved them, like mine did. I just wanted to protect them from the tragedy this ends in.

I'm sorry...I tried...

A tear escaped his control, and he cursed himself for letting it through, running a hand down his face to hide the action of wiping it away.

No more pretending. No more putting on a cruel mask in the hopes of scaring her off. She wasn't going anywhere. The damage was already done, he'd already said the cruel things, made her cry, terrorized, abandoned, and hurt her. He would deal with it–it had been his choice. He'd expected her to hate him from the start. But if she was keeping the babies, there were far more important things to discuss right now.

"Don't breastfeed them."

"I'm...sorry?" She asked in confusion, surprised by Levi's suddenly soft-spoken words. He turned to face her, cruel outward appearance gone and replaced with a tired man just trying his best.

"I get that it's important right now to help them adjust and everything, but as soon as you can switch to a bottle. Formula or pumped milk, I don't care, just don't feed them straight from the breast. It'll hurt you if you keep doing it, even if you can't tell. A bottle is safer."

"Why are you telling me this?" She asked cautiously.

"Because if you're going to keep them with you, then you need to know how to do that safely."

She stared at him, shocked. "You get me pregnant on purpose, disappear for the entire pregnancy, show up claiming you're going to take them, tell me all these terrible things about demon nature, threaten to kill me if I don't willingly hand them over, and now, just like that, you're going to back off and let me keep them? Dump a bunch of how-to information on me and then disappear again? I can't fucking figure you out."

She was never going to know just how damn hard he worked to do what was best for everyone involved. Namely the babies, but preferably her, too. He couldn't tell her half the things he'd done and would do in the name of protecting them. Or that he'd actually been there every step of the way through her pregnancy. He wished he could say he'd take it to his grave, but he'd never die unless one of his enemies finally got the drop on him, so it didn't work...or perhaps it made the saying all the more poignant.

Levi gave her a faintly bitter look. "You're getting too optimistic. I'm not going anywhere, either."

"If you think I'm letting you into their lives after that display, you're delusional," she said sharply. "I'll make sure it's in writing and everything that you can't–"

"No court on Earth is ever going to give you the legal protection you're thinking of right now because I don't answer to any court on Earth. I don't even exist up here except when I want to," Levi said coolly, cutting off her ultimately meaningless rant about having a court forbid him from being in his children's lives. "I'm also not the only demon out there–and I'm far from the worst. Others will be looking to put a claim on taking care of the twins when you're out of the picture, and they'll be far less gentle about it. Might even take matters into their own hands. Do you really want to be sending me away and rolling the dice on just how bad the next demon to show up will be?"

He reminded himself to ease up with his blunt words, still partially in that cruel mindset he'd been putting himself in for a month to try and break the twins from her grasp. It was going to take a bit to shake that role off, especially when he was also a little...naturally abrasive, but he would be back to himself soon.

Seeing the threatened but still unwilling look on her face, and well aware he'd just threatened her again, Levi sighed, coming over to stand by the twins, ignoring how it made her tense and look ready for a fight to have him so close to them.

"You don't have to like me. We don't have to get along–I fully expect you to hate me for eternity. And I know the last thing you want is to have to see more of me." Levi's gaze lowered to the sleeping babies in the bassinets, one hand resting lightly on his daughter's head this time. "But for their sake, we have to make something work. Because there will be other demons showing up with foul intentions if you send me away. And there is far too much you don't know about their nature to not have someone who does know in their lives. Because like it or not, they're my children too, and they need me as much as you want them."

She looked like she'd tasted something awful, but at the same time, there was truth to his words. She didn't know about their demon nature, and that was dangerous to her, and for them. To have someone who knew about that part and could help give proper care was invaluable, and something no mother had in the past, as far as Levi was aware. The fathers always left the mothers on their own to fend for their own, and left the kids to some random demon who stepped into a 'caregiver' role, if it could be called that, after the mother died. But Levi was here from the start, and stepping in to help instead of leaving her to fend for herself and the babies.

If she would let him.

And there was a threat of other demons coming after them. Like it or not, he had enemies–lots of them–and they needed a protector.

"If I feel for even a moment like you're a bad influence, that you have bad intentions for them or that you might hurt them, you will be cut off."

Levi stared hard at her, tucking away the pain once more at the knowledge she thought him capable of harming his own children. He'd done nothing to give her the impression otherwise–nothing that she'd seen, anyway.

"You can think whatever you want about me, hate me as much as you like, I don't care. But don't you dare think for a second that I want anything other than for these two to be safe and taken care of. I want what's best for them, everyone else be damned."

Including myself.

She seemed taken aback by the intense show of fatherhood he'd just given her, leaning back on the bed and staring openly at him, though words escaped her for the moment. Levi recomposed himself, pulling his hand back from the bassinet and moving towards the door of the room she was in.

"You should get some rest. You've had a long day," Levi said curtly, and without giving her any more explanation or anything else in parting, he walked out the door.

He made himself invisible to the human eye again as he stepped through, so no one would bother him and he would have a moment alone to gather himself and his thoughts.

The self-loathing could come later. If he was going to be taking in the twins as well as their mother...

Levi took a shaking breath, eyes opening slowly as he stared up at the hospital ceiling, his head leaned back against the door.

At long last, he allowed himself to do the math. Now that it was imperative he had an idea how much time she had. He'd tried to spare himself this part, he'd thought it wouldn't do to know except to hurt him if he ever stopped and thought about it. But now that he needed to know how much time his children had with their mother...

A single child pregnancy took about 15 to 20 years from the mother and gave it to the child, so that they would be set until they started to mature, until they started to be romantically or physically active and they could start consciously feeding to expand their lifespan. She'd carried two to full term, which meant she'd lost 30 years at the least, 40 at the most, to the twins. She had been pregnant with triplets. He didn't know how much life was taken at what points in a pregnancy, but to be safe, he'd say she lost another ten years to the third before they'd died. From the pregnancy alone, the entire pregnancy, she'd lost 40 to 50 years of her life.

And then there was the damage he'd done trying to get her pregnant. Every intimate touch, every kiss, every act, was a bit more time of her life she sacrificed to him, and a bit more time he would live. He'd easily taken years from her with all the sex they'd had. It was that much longer he would live, that much longer he could go before he'd have to feed again. He was probably set until his children's teenage years. So 10 to 15 years he'd taken from her, roughly.

She was already in her twenties now. He didn't know how long she would live, only Reapers had that information, and not even demons or angels could see Reapers unless the Reapers wanted to be seen. All he could do was guess how much time she had left.

Ten years was out of the question–she wouldn't make it that long. He gave her five years, at least. Maybe six. Seven was being generous. Eight would be a miracle. And that was as it stood right now, without any extra time being shorn off by accidents or calculated risks to allow some basic motherly affection to the children. Because they had no control over it. The wrong shows of affection, and the twins would unintentionally take more of her life for their own.

Five to eight years. That's how much time she had with the twins before it would be just Levi to look out for them.

Levi took a deep breath again, that pain in his heart for what was to come persisting as he pulled out a phone, calling one of the very few numbers on his phone.

"Hey. I need you two to do something for me."