Alex

......

I reopened my eyes and looked around, seeing the little flame bouncing around like a child. 

"You want me to follow you?" I stood up the moment it moved away from me. I felt weak and hungry even though my body wasn't here. It's weird how the Duat works when we aren't dead.

I followed it quietly around, and its dim light allowed me to see the ruins of old buildings nearby, as well as what appeared to be skeletons of enormous creatures on our way. I recall my father telling me that Ra had to fight the demons guarding the Duat every day in order to ensure that the souls would go into reincarnation. 

The flame stopped randomly in front of a wall. "I don't want to sound rude or anything, but I cannot pass a wall." It passed the wall the moment I said this. Well, here goes nothing. I never expected that Harry Potter-style would come to haunt me.

There was a brief moment of complete silence before a clear white light blinded me. I couldn't see anything for a moment. Then I saw them, three beautiful beings, sitting around a table full of food. Fruit trees full of delicious fruits surrounded the area. The fragrance was overwhelming. I heard little splashes from the fountain in the middle. I ran towards it and started to drink it like there was no tomorrow.

"Well, this is quite unacceptable, how uncivilised!  come here girl, sit down and drink properly." The first woman said, her voice was quite dark and somehow didn't match her appearance. 

"Now, now Sachmis, do not say she is uncivilised she is just thirsty." Said the woman next to her. Her voice was very low and high-pitched.

I approached the three and sat next to them. After all this, I just don't care if they harm me, I am too weak to even scream. Someone had placed fried caramelised pork with some vegetables on the side on the table. The plate was already ready for me. They were expecting me. I ignored them and started to eat. I seemed like a monster, but I didn't care. I devoured that meal so fast and still felt hungry, so I ate until nothing was left. None of the three said anything until I asked.

"Is there a toilet here?" All three looked at me, surprised. Maybe these human-looking beings don't use it.

"Of course," Sachmis said. making a door appear. 

I went towards it, and only now realised that I was still wearing that damn dress. "Do you maybe have more comfortable clothes?"

"They are waiting for you inside." Said Sachmis.

I looked down and saw that I was touching the ground. How weird! I thought I couldn't touch or feel anything in the Duat. I just realised that I could eat and drink, something was off. I felt everything, even the light breeze that touches the trees and makes an appealing sound.

I entered the room, and it was, as I expected, overdone. Gold and diamonds ornate the entire room. The yellow light made the room seem cosy. Hmm, it seems they have electricity, that is weird. I went to the toilet. After leaving it, I washed my hands surprisingly, they have running water. I saw the clothes on a little golden table. Simple clothes, thank God no dress, just a pair of jeans and a black long-sleeved shirt. I put them on and threw the dress on the table. I looked at myself in the mirror, it seemed I was clean, even though I just came from a battle. This made me smile, but it quickly faded.

I just looked at myself, my breath was getting heavier. I opened and closed my hands to calm myself. My breath was getting worse. It felt as if the surrounding aura around me was pushing me down. I lost strength in my legs. Falling down, I felt tears form. I kept my eyes open so I would not cry. I put my hands over my head. I couldn't contain my tears. I let it all out. It was too much. I felt something coming towards my throat. I crawled as fast as I could towards the toilet and vomited everything I ate. I tried to get up to clean my mouth. I cleaned it and drank some water from the faucet.

My racing mind couldn't shut up!

Why me? 

Did I deserve this?

I just wanted to go to university!

Why did I have to see those horrors? Poor people, poor children, poor... I put my head against the sink. I looked around, it is so calm here, the second time I am alone. 

I am alone. I just want to go back. Each time I said it, I banged my hand against the sink.

Back!

Back!

Back!

I...help... I....need... help. Each time, I punch harder.

Help me, please! Splashes of tears fell, my chest feeling as if it would explode. 

I looked at the mirror and smashed it with my hand. It broke apart, as did my mind. It cut my hand. I saw broken parts on the ground. I sat down and fixed on them. They seemed to be calling me. It would be so easy, just two, and all would be done. I took one, and I brought it close to my veins.

Yet, before doing anything, I threw it against the wall. 

"I will survive for you, Noah, I will protect you, little brother," but will my mind survive?

I dried my tears and washed my hands, taking all the blood away. The pain of water over the wounds was painful. The blood went down the drain, as did my breakdown. No one will ever know, besides the broken mirror. I opened the door and went out as if nothing had happened. In a way, I put on my mask.

Sachmis seemed confused and asked, "Did something happen to your hand?"

Shit, I forgot about that. Make something up.

"Ohh, I just, uhm... I just hit the toilet door. Idiot me." I don't believe they believed me, but they didn't say anything anymore. I went towards them and sat down next to the other one, who seemed kind. Her beautiful red hair was ornate with white roses, and she wore a simple white dress and no shoes.

She spoke to me with her high-pitched voice, "I am Imnt, welcome to our realm."

"Where am I exactly?" I still felt that something was off.

"This is our home, we are the psyche." Did she just say psyche? My mother wanted me to talk to them!

"You are them." My smile grew, and I wanted to bounce in happiness, but I quickly remembered that Neith told me not to help them. What do I do?

Sachmis spoke, "We want to help you, we are the last three psyches that exist. We are glad you found us or better said we found you." Her voice makes my body shiver.

"How many were you before?" I raised my eyebrows.

There the third finally spoke, and he didn't seem to like me, "Seven, that's how many, it is not important, they died and we are still here, ask important questions!"

"Apepi, don't be so rude to her. She is here to help, aren't you?" Sachmis and Imnt looked at me with a smile, but Apepi raised his shoulders and looked at the fountain.

"How did they die?" Well, I suffered enough to be here, so at least they can answer my questions.

"You are annoying, aren't you? They died in the war, of course!" They must mean the first one.

"Which one?" Let's see if they fall into the trap.

"Can you stop with your absurd questions? We have things to do. But if you really want to know, it was the second one. We survived, luckily." He seemed confident, but they weren't there, at least Neith said so, and why would she lie? They are lying.

"What do you mean, we have things to do?" He stood up and pointed towards the water.

Apepi looked at me and at his fellow psyche. " This will show one vision of your past."

Not again, the war was already horrible enough, I just want to go home. Shut up, Alex, you take as much as you can. You need to save Noah, no matter what!

Sachmis stood up and spoke over Apepi, who seemed annoyed "It will show you what you need to tap into your magic."

"Show me?"

Imnt put her hand on me and said " Yes, dear, you will see something that triggered your powers for the first time."

"Wait, wouldn't I remember it if it happened?" Imnt avoided my gaze before replying.

"Well, normally you would, dear, but your mother came to us for a memory potion, she didn't want you or your brother to remember what happened.

My mother made me forget. She certainly just wanted to protect us from my father, I guess.

"I think I am ready." All three of them looked at each other and clapped their hands, chanting in some bizarre language, it felt like ancient Egyptian, if I remember my father mumbling it.

The fountain let out a white glow, surrounded by black. The water turned into gold.

Apepi looked at me and said, "Lie on it, and it will bring you back where you need to go."

I took all my courage to approach I started to take off my clothes before Sachmis stopped me. "No need, this water will not wet you it will only trigger your memory, but be warned, it might show you more than you expect."

I put one of my feet into it to be sure it didn't make me wet, and it didn't. It felt actually quite comforting and like a long-overdue hug. I let myself slide in, and the warmth quickly enrobed me like a loving embrace. My eyes slowly closed, and I felt the sleepiness take me.

The next thing I remember is waking up in front of my blue house in Luxembourg. The wind moved the trees, but not my hair. He did tell me that the past is just a shadow of what it was. It can never be changed. I wasn't expecting that my magic would first appear in this house. 

Let's go in, maybe it will make it clearer. I slowly marched towards the door, and for one second I just stood there contemplating if I should enter. In the end, I passed through the door. It would have been practical to be able to pass objects in the past.

Inside, I could hear laughs and screams of happiness, they came from the living room, and balloons were all around us. Mostly green is my favourite colour. Children playing around. I entered the dining room and saw a huge cake on the table, green and decorated with little chickens on a farm. I saw my mother sitting at my side and my father on the other, smiling at each other and wishing me a happy birthday.

No, no, not this day, why are you showing me this? I tried to breathe slowly, but my mind was racing. Slowly, the beautiful colour turned grey and full of sorrow, and the scenery changed into the burial. Seeing an empty coffin is weird now that I know he is alive.

The scenery changed again, but this time I couldn't remember it at all. My baby brother was sleeping in his little bed. He seemed to have three or four years. Which means I had between thirteen and fourteen years. I heard my mother returning home, and I could hear her opening a bottle. I went to look and saw that she was drinking not a glass of wine but the entire bottle.

What is going on? I do not remember this at all. 

I heard the footsteps of my younger self coming down, talking slowly.

"Mum, Noah needs you could you take care of him? I need to study for a test." I seemed desperate and exhausted. I don't remember anything about this. My mother just looked indifferent she actually already seemed drunk by her way of walking past me without saying anything.

I saw my little me getting mad, and she started to scream towards my mother.

"Mum, come on, talk to me! I need you to help me out. I cannot take care of him every day. For three years, this has been like this. I am a child taking care of a child. Mummy, please, look at me. Come back to me, Mummy." I jumped on my mother, who just pushed me back and slapped me. I fell to the ground with eyes filled with tears. This couldn't be right she had never hit me. 

I felt the house slowly starting to tremble, and around me, a white clear light was appearing. I just screamed, "You fucking bitch, how can you do this to me, me who for three years has been taking care of your son, the house, and you? I sacrificed my entire last years to be sure this family stays together, and you treat me like shit? Well, then get out, get drunk, and for the love of God, DIE! The moment I said that a huge wave of light moved towards my mother destroying the entire living room. My mother was pushed against the wall. The bottle in her hand broke and cut her in places. I looked terrified and ran upstairs, leaving my mother all alone. I looked at this woman, and I barely recognised her. She moved her hand around and started to chant, the only thing I understood was "Psyche". There, all three of them appeared.

"What a mess! She used her powers didn't she?" Sachmis said. 

"Look at her she seems completely drunk, humans are such weak creatures." Apepi's face was filled with disdain.

Well, they are less kind than I expected. My mother tried to talk, but she was too drunk. All three psyches put their hands against my mother's body. She seemed to regain some colour and sobriety.

"What just happened?" my mother asked, disoriented.

"Your daughter used her powers, almost killing you in the process, because of  your incompetence." Apepi really had no tact.

"He is alive!"

"Who? The three asked.

"My husband never loved them or me, he wants to use them to do something." Her face was stone cold, but her eyes were full of desperation.

"Well, what a surprise this is, but you think you can protect them if you are like this? Here, take this." Imnt's voice seemed less kind.

"Put it on her and she will forget whatever you want, but you get treated, or else you are making his job easier." They left, but didn't they tell me that my mother went to see them? And their reaction to my father being alive was very calm. I am so confused.

My mother looked at the potion and cried. "How can I take their memories? It is my fault. I was warned by everyone, and yet I married this man. I hope they can forgive me one day. I am going to make them remember as little as possible. I am going to treat myself, giving them a normal life." She slowly marched to my room upstairs. I rarely heard her speak to herself, but I do remember her speaking in her bedroom when she felt alone.

She opened my bedroom door. I was sleeping, and I guess my power exhausted my body. My mother sat next to me, and she touched my hair, moving it away from my forehead. She purred it on me, and the vision stopped.

Edit: 24/05/2023

Hope you enjoyed the chapter and thank you for reading.