I awake to the smell of toast and fresh coffee and the distinct and chilly absence of him.   Clearly he's decided to challenge himself to become domestic god of the year by making me breakfast too.

Jake's digital clock by the bed tells me its 6:20am. I should move. I don't want to move.  His bed is comfortable and warm – though not as comfortable as mine – but I still want to stay cocooned between his sheets for the foreseeable.

But I cant because I have a full time job. When I stretch my body out to shake off the sleep I find that I'm sore; a delicious Jake inflicted sore that I can more than definitely live with.  With a soft groan I slide over and out of the bed.

In his bathroom, it takes me a moment to figure out how to turn on his modern shower encased in the stylish granite shower stall, but once I do I'm about to step in when I remember my overnight case with my toiletries is downstairs. As I come out of the bathroom I gasp at the sight of him standing at the top of the stairs holding my small back case.

He's completely naked, and my mouth waters at the site of his body, all hard defined muscle covered with dark tattoos.  My eyes dip lower towards the slightly aroused length between his legs and I feel the dull needy ache start up again between my legs.   He makes me crazy.  Correction: Horny and crazy.

He looks me over from head to toe, the hot look in his eyes sending pinpricks of heat all over me.  Again I marvel at how utterly comfortable I feel being completely stark naked in front of him. It's not who I am normally.  But then, with his eyes looking at me like the way they are right now, so appreciatively, it feels practically life affirming.  I could easily make nudity my new thing.  

"Thought I heard you moving about.  Coming for this?" he holds my black travel case out to me temptingly, a naught boyish grin on his face.   Smiling, I walk toward him and reach out my hand to take it, accidentally (on purpose) grazing his ever hardening length as I do. He shivers a little at the contact and I smile deeper.

"Thank you," I say turning around to lay the case on his bed to retrieve my shower bag. I feel his eyes on me the entire time and I hope the sexy strut I put on as I saunter back to the bathroom isn't too over the top. 

Clutching my shower bag, I step carefully into his powerful shower and tilt my head under the spray and close my eyes. I moan at the feel of the water hitting my tender back and sluicing between my slightly achy thighs.  When I open them to retrieve some shower gel Jake is standing in the doorframe, watching me with riveted expression on his face. 

"Need any help in there?" he says, the corner of his mouth twitching.

I smile.  "I've done this before.  I think I can manage it."

He nods and then leans up off the frame and walks a few steps toward me.  "Ask me to come in there with you." His voice is low and commanding and my heartbeat quickens.  As I get an image of his wet, naked body pressed against mine I know I'm not about to deny him anything.

"Come in here with me." I say quietly.  His smile is slow and sexy as he steps gracefully into the large shower stall and comes to stand in front of me.  To allow him space, I move back so that I'm pressed against the marble shower wall and he moves closer tipping his head under the shower head. 

I'm beginning to think that knowing him in one context could have lots of variations and isn't to be scoffed at.   Naked, and naked in water being just two.  I mean the possibilities are endless really. 

He puts both his hands up on the shower wall on either side of my head and leans into me, kissing me deep and slow on the mouth, the water running between our lips making this kiss noisy and messy.  It makes me think back to the time in my living room when he almost managed to make me orgasm without laying a finger on me - or by laying one finger on me to be more precise.

"I really like you wet." he says bringing his mouth to the side of my neck as I slide my hands around his body to feel his perfect behind.  As I squeeze gently he presses himself into me, his full hardness pushing against my belly tauntingly. I slide a hand between our bodies and grip him hard. His body shudders and he lets out a low groan.

"I like you wet too," I whisper.  He pulls back and smiles, his eyes closing over on a groan as I begin to stroke him slowly but firmly.

"Mmmm.... You know normally when I'm in here, I'm just imagining this is happening." He's smiling naughtily with his eyes still closed.

"You thought about this?" I ask. The idea makes me very very turned on.  He opens his eyes and raises an eyebrow at me.  That's a yes.  He leans in to kiss me noisily again, sucking the water from my mouth.

"I thought about you naked and wet in my bed, and then naked and wet in my shower, yes.  And here you are..." he whispers.    "Fantasy come to life.."

I blush, feeling even more turned on. "Tell me how that fantasy goes?  The shower one."

He laughs a little but doesn't look embarrassed or uncomfortable at the idea of sharing it, just amused.  Christ I'm so turned on.  And it's not even 7am yet.  Is this what life with him would be like?  Each day starting off like this?  If so, I'm changing my sleeping patterns.  Who needs a lie in anyway?

"You touch me, like you're doing now," he explains.  "until I almost come and then you kneel down at my feet and finish me off with your mouth." He groans softly in the back of his throat.   Suddenly kneeling at his feet and finishing him with my mouth is all I can think of. Of the water slushing around us as I take him in my mouth and drink from him.   "Then I return the favour.  Not always in that order though.  It varies." He tells me. 

I curl my bottom lip in between my teeth.  "And how many times have you had this fantasy exactly?" I ask as I begin to quicken the movement of my hand on his erection. 

"Every day since I first saw you," he answers immediately, his breathing hitching slightly.  "Sometimes twice a day."

We met almost 4 weeks ago. 

He brings his mouth to my neck and begins to move his hips forward and back into my hand, growling quietly as he suckles at my neck.  His breaths are shorter and sharper now.  He must be close. His hand comes up to grab my breast and he squeezes it before lowering his head to suck the water from my nipple which is hard and sore.

"Tell me when you're going to..." I say but he cuts me off.

"Now baby, now," he groans.  I slide my body down the wall of the shower and position myself on my knees in front of him, replacing my hand with my lips, moaning as I take him inside my mouth.  He tastes heavenly. Warm, large and male and his intoxicating saltiness spreads across my tongue deliciously. I bring my hands up and clasp the sensitive parts between his legs, massaging them tenderly as he moans loud above me.

He moves his hips back and forth pushing himself into my mouth.  "Don't stop baby...deeper, fuck that's it Alex..." In my hair, his hand grips gently whilst he presses the other against the wall to hold himself up.   I suck him in deep calculated gulps, focusing on his moans and on his length and how his hips move as his hand directs my mouth over his cock.  The deeper I go the harder he grips me and the louder and more ragged his breathing becomes.  I love him like this.  Undone. 

When I feel him still for an instant, then jerk, I prepare to swallow.   But before I feel his hot wetness enter my mouth he pulls out and pulls me up from the floor, and takes himself with his hand and comes instead in great spasms across my body. His fierce male groans as he does this makes my body tremble, and the sight of him doing it is completely pornographic.  It feels dirty and it speaks to some baser desire in me I wasn't entirely aware of until this moment.

"Changed my mind," he pants.  "I want it on you.  So I can wash it off." he leans in and kisses me hard as he pours out his orgasm onto my stomach.  He wants to do that? That is... wow.  When he comes to a stop he sucks my tongue and bites my lower lip before pulling back to smile at me.

"Well that was a lot fucking better than the fantasy." He tells me.

I blush under the powerful spray.  "Well I'm glad I lived up to your expectations."

"You always do Doctor." he says in that strange far off tone.  He reaches behind me for the shower gel and squirts some onto his hand, and begins to rub it into a fragrant soapy lather in his palms.  Then he reaches out and places his hands flat on my stomach and circles them outwards and upwards, washing away his expulsion.  

His hands are tender and slow as they sweep across my front and over my hips before they go round the back and find my bum, which he massages softly but firmly.  He squeezes each cheek a few times and it eases some of the ache I woke with this moring.  I hope he does he same to my thighs which are also tender and achy.  As if reading my mind, his hand slides between my thighs and I moan, spreading my legs slightly to let him in.  But he leaves me wanting when he moves his hand away almost immediately and focuses his attention back on my body, his face a mask of concentration as he cleans me. 

Ben and I never showered together, not in eight years. It just never appealed to me.  I always imagined it would be an awkward mangled experience with lots of cold patches as one of us hogged most of the hot water. How wrong I was. Perhaps it's my companion, but its not awkward, or mangled.  As with everything Jake does it is sensual and erotic and as though he's done it all before a thousand times and knows exactly what he's doing.  There I go again.  I need to stop this.  I'm stopping this. 

"I love your skin Alex.  You're so soft and pale.  It's perfect."  He's watching the movement of his own hands across my body, in a sort of trance like state as he speaks and as I watch him, also in a sort of trance like state.   His hands come down over my breasts, his thumbs skimming my nipples, which are desperately hard. He leans down to kiss the left, sucking it gently into his mouth swirling his tongue around it before doing the same with the other.   I watch his every movement transfixed, suspended in pleasure.  Who knew bathing could be so erotic.  I lean back into the wall as he runs his hands up across my collarbone, massaging my shoulders before sweeping them down my arms.

"Put your hands above your head for me." He says softly.  When I raise them he cleans down my inner arms, all the way back down over my breasts once more. He makes his touch there seem almost accidental this time but another little moan escapes my lips all the same.  Holy christ I think I might orgasm just from this.  From him cleaning me.  I drop my arms, wanting to bring his mouth back to my body, but he stops and lifts his disapproving eyes up to mine

"Keep them up.  I like you like this," He says softly.

As I do he leans in and flicks his tongue across my nipple, tauntingly gentle, it makes my fingers curl above my head with need.  I dip my head and kiss the top of his, needing him to know how much I want to touch him.  He moves his mouth to my other breast and repeats the same mind-numbing process there. Jesus Christ I love his mouth and what it can do.  My arms are starting to weigh a ton though and I really want to lower them and rest them on the strong wet expanse of his back.

As though reading my mind, he looks up at me. "Put your hands down now and turn around." He says.

As I lower my hands I smile at him.  "You're very thorough." 

"Told you I wasn't anti bathing," he smirks.  "We're only halfway through.  Now turn around."

When I'm facing the marble I place my palms flat on the shower wall.  I feel his hand slide down my spine and over my bum before it leaves my body completely.  Then I hear the sound of squirting and more lathering and then they're on me again at the top of my back.  Jake's hands massage my shoulders and neck before proceeding down my body in the same slow outward circular movements. When he reaches my bum he massages each cheek gently, his hands squeezing and releasing several times.  It makes me glad I have a generous sized bum so that there is something for him to massage so expertly. 

He slides his hand between my legs, grazing the ache that's been building there softly – too softly.  I'm growing impatient for him and his cleansing ministrations are just heightening that, which I assume is his plan.  And now can't I see him.  I'm so turned on.

"Open your legs for me Alex." he says and I don't hesitate before stepping to the right to give him access. 

I feel his hand between my legs again and then his finger slip inside, teasing me.  I moan and bite my lip just about managing to hold myself together as I press my forehead to the cool stone of the shower wall. He moves his finger in and out and round the outside of me tenderly and slowly but there's something clinical about it.   It's devoid of his usual scorching pressure.  Then I realise he isn't trying to pleasure me.  He's simply cleaning me, all of me. It still stokes the heat inside me though and I want him to quicken his movements, deepen them, and stoke me further.  I want him to pleasure me.   I don't protest however.  I try and stay still and open for him whilst the inside of my body tightens with desire. 

He removes his fingers from my body and goes back to cleaning me.  I feel like screaming in frustration.  I feel him move down my body so that he's kneeling and he proceeds to use both hands to wash down my left leg, then across my foot before doing the same to my left.   He runs his hand back up my leg and I jolt when his fingers are back where I want them, this time with more urgency and intent.  As he grazes my clitoris he slides another finger inside me and I let out a low moan of pleasure.  Finally.   Wantonly I push my bum out and I feel him bite my right cheek and then the other.  Jake's fingers begin to move faster then, rubbing, sliding, stoking the fire between my legs and in the pit of my belly.  I move my hips forward and back desperate for more of it.

Suddenly he grabs my hip with one hand and spins me around so that my back is pressed against the wall. He lifts my leg up and spreads me open with his hands before looking up at me with a look of greedy intent. As I bite down on the soft cushion of my bottom lip he lowers his head and claims me fully with his mouth.  His tongue slides over the folds and creases of my most intimate place hungrily in lapping motions, as he sucks and drinks at me and the water, which has travelled its way down my body.   The sight of his wet, gorgeous body and the sensations he's caused to bring me here are like nothing I've ever experienced. 

Am I really so sexually inexperienced that Jake giving me oral sex in the shower is the kinkiest experience of my life?  I grab his hair and pull his head closer, rubbing his mouth against me desperately.  I feel his hand come around my body and slide between my legs from behind, where he teases me open with his fingers as he angles me deeper into his mouth.  That does it.  My legs threaten to buckle beneath me as the clenching begins and my legs go weak.

"Tell me how I make you feel baby." he asks as he replaces his mouth with a hot wet finger and looks up at me. His cheek is resting against my thigh, his lips an inch or so from where I want them. 

Okay.  The fact that he thinks I'm able to speak right now is one thing, but actually being able to formulate words to explain how he makes me feel - well that's something else.  I'm not even sure I'd even be able to do that were I not on the cusp of orgasm. I'm glad that brain function makes the body breathe automatically because I'm certain I wouldn't be able to that by myself right now either. 

Instead of responding I make a small desperate noise that I hope conveys the magnificent torture he is putting me through.

"Tell me." he says again, firmer this time.

"Jake please," I plead, grinding against him, desperate for my climax. Greedy for it.  I fist my hands in his hair and fix him with a desperate stare. "You know how you make me feel."

He presses his lips to my thigh.  "I know. But I want to hear you say it."  He starts nipping sadistically at the very top of my inner thigh, just shy of the part that's throbbing in need for him.  

"Please," I breathe. Was that his tongue again?  Did he just lick me? I moan which just makes him laugh, sexily, sadistically.  Why can't I think of any adjectives to describe how he makes me feel?  "Amazing....  You make me feel...incredible... you're incredible. Please... just... I need your mouth on me...please Jake." I'm whimpering now and it's pathetic but he's sadistic and so I feel no shame in doing it.  

In the next instant I feel his mouth on me again.  Its intense, and hot and urgent and greedy and I explode almost instantly onto his beautiful glorious tongue.  My climax is an endless wave of heat turning me into a sodden boneless mass struggling to hold itself upright.  That's what he does, reduces me to nothing.  

As I rub myself against him as he continues to strokes me with his fingers from behind and suck softly at my core.  I feel emptied, delirious and so very warm. I want to sleep. He runs his tongue up the length of me and stands up, coming to his full height a good few inches above me. 

He's soaking and his cheeks are flushed, his eyes a bright glittering blue green.  He also has that small self-satisfied smile on his face which looks utterly magnificent on him.  He always looks magnificent though.   He is bloody magnificent.   I smile and sigh deeply before tilting my head back under the spray.  He leans forward and presses me against the wall with his body and kisses me slow and deep.  I have to grip onto his shoulders hard to make sure I don't collapse under him.   He sucks at my mouth and bites my lip gently before pulling back. 

"Ok. Time to wash your hair." He smiles. 

We pull up to the surgery just before 8:30am, Jake managing to somehow make light work of the heavy rush hour traffic.  He leaves the engine idling and turns in his seat to face me, smiling at me with his head tilted slightly. He's wearing sunglasses so I cant see his eyes but when his tongue slips out to graze his bottom lip I can tell his eyes are hot and twinkling and he's thinking about earlier.  As am I.

"Well that was fun." I smile, looking down into my lap, feeling the blush creep up my neck.  "Thanks for letting me stay over, and for dinner last night.  And breakfast this morning." He'd made me toast and coffee, frowning when I'd said it was as much as I could manage in the morning - had a healthy looking omelette and some grapefruit.  I'd enjoyed having breakfast with him. 

"My pleasure," he says.  "Thanks for the shower."  He takes off his shades and smirks at me.

"It was your shower, I should be thanking you," I smile, staring at his mouth.  I hope he's thinking what I'm thinking.   That he wants to kiss me too.  I'm pretty sure he is, I'm getting better at reading his eyes.   "So I'll see you tomorrow?  For Dinner?" I sound calm even though the thought of it is making me feel slightly sick.   Jake nods and reaches across the space, casually brushing my hair back away from my face.

"Yeah.  Tomorrow.  Call me later and we can sort it out." he says. His eyes are still on my mouth. It makes my mouth water with the need to taste him. 

"I will."  I whisper as I lean forward.  He returns my kiss, almost chastely at first, but then he pulls me closer moaning a soft male moan as his tongue moves deliciously against my own.  When he pulls back I'm a little breathless and my body hot.   "So.... we'll talk later." I say.

"Yeah... later." he nods.

I open the passenger door and climb out, smoothing down my dress and hair as I walk around the front of the car towards the pavement.  I hear the window going down and so I turn and take a step back toward him.

"I liked waking up with you this morning Alex." He says. 

Well be still my beating heart.  I smile like a twelve year old girl and nod.

"I did too.  If only your bed was as comfy as mine." I sigh.  He puts on a hurt face, but there's a smile hidden there.

"Your bed was pretty comfy I have to agree," he nods.  "Maybe I just like waking up with you."

"Well tomorrow if you're a good boy and you behave I'll let you have a sleepover at mine." I smile.   Jake grins, and its adorable, and I feel myself fall a little further.

"And here was me thinking you liked the bad boy in me?  We kinda have a habit of misbehaving." His tone is playful but it has a depth too.   He's right though.  I do like the bad boy in him.  His intensity, his barely hidden temper, his filthy mouth.  Instead of telling him this I give him a chastising shake of the head and turn back towards the surgery. 

"Until tonight then." I hear him say behind me. 

I wave over my shoulder as I climb the steps of the converted townhouse.   He waits until I'm in the front door before pulling away, the sound of his car roaring off down the street as I walk into reception. 

Because I'm still grinning like an idiot as I pass the desk, Anna gives me a wide-eyed knowing look.   "Looks like someone had a good night," she says.  I pull a confused face and shake my head at her and gesture for my case files for the day. 

"Thank you," I say as I take them from her.  "is Douglas in yet?"  I scan through the top 5.  I have Mrs Goldman today again. Not until later though and I'm in such a good mood that I doubt even she can ruin it. 

"Yeah, just five minutes ago. He's in the kitchen."

I dump my files on my desk and grab my coffee cup and go to find Douglas to give him a brief summation of yesterday's seminar.  Sam and him are chatting away as I enter the staff kitchen and they both turn to look at me.  Sam smiling sheepishly and dropping his eyes. 

"Alexandra, hello..." Douglas chirps.  "You made it back in one piece then?  How was it?" he says and Sam swiftly excuses himself and leaves.  I guess everything isn't totally business as usual between us despite what we said. I sigh and focus instead on trying to convince Douglas that he needs to speculate to accumulate.

When I get home from work Fred is most definitely in a cat grump with me. I know because when I opened the front door he was sitting on the bottom step of the stairs staring at me accusingly.   Then he gave me withering look before sauntering off into the kitchen.   No coming to lie at my feet for strokes, or purring against my legs affectionately. Yep, most definitely not happy with me. 

On the fridge is a note from Ed saying that he fed Fred yesterday and again this morning and this afternoon and that my keys are back in the flowerpot.  I make a mental note to take a bottle of wine over or bake a cake as a thank you.  I have the best neighbours a single woman with a cat could ask for. For the first time in months, the word 'single' isn't followed by the words 'and better for it' in my head.  Maybe I'm not single anymore.

I put some food out for Fred and then go to the fridge to see if I have anything for myself to eat, eventually closing it on a bored sigh.   I really need to do some shopping this week.  How on earth am I baking a cake for Ed and Betty when I'm barely sustaining myself?  Mentally I pencil in a trip to Waitrose for Sunday afternoon; presuming I'm not too hung-over after catching up with Nick and his new Isabelle.  I can't actually believe my brother has met someone.  So Nick's dating seriously and I'm sleeping with a tattooed self-proclaimed bad boy nightclub owner.  Well the Marlowe kids have certainly come of age.

Grabbing an apple from the fruit bowl I go through to the living room.  On the phone next to the sofa the red digits are flashing with 4 new messages.  I know at least one of which is from mum last night.  I'd be as well dealing with her sooner rather than later I suppose and so I pick up the handset and flop down on the couch and hit speedial for my parent's house.  It rings a couple of times before Dad answers.

"Oh hi sweetheart.  How's things?" he asks.  He sounds his usual chirpy self.  No undercurrent to suggest he knows anything about the Jake/Ben episode from yesterday.  Mum couldn't have told him. Or if she had he doesn't think it a big enough deal to mention right off the bat.

"Great dad, how are you?" Dad fills me in and we chat about France and he tells me he and mum booked the flights to Nice today.  My parents bought and renovated a large farmhouse in the south of France 12 years ago and we've gone over almost every year since as a family. It's in a beautiful rural spot about 5 miles from Nice and its always amazing to go and lie by the pool for 3 weeks during the summer.  Not that I can sunbathe properly.  But I love it there.  For some reason though, I'm a little reticent at the thought of leaving the country for 3 weeks.  Or more specifically, leaving Jake for 3 weeks.  It's ridiculous and I'm aware that this level of attachment when left unchecked is unhealthy but it doesn't make a shred of difference to the irrational needy female part of my brain.   

"I'm seeing Nick on Saturday so I'll talk to him then about what he's thinking, promise." I say, careful not to mention the name Isabelle.   I know dad would only be vaguely interested, but if mum got wind it would be banners and baby names and my brother would kill me.

"Ok love, I'll get your mum.  Come over see us soon yes?" I make a promise and he calls for mum.

"Alex darling!" she comes on all harried and high-pitched, "I was worried sick yesterday when I couldn't reach you but thank god Nicholas called to say you were fine." she says and I roll my eyes. "You were at a friend's in the city he said?" her voice is laced with something.  She wants to ask more.

"Sorry I missed your call mum.  Yes, I was in town for a work thing.  Then I stayed at a friend's." I lie. Jake a friend. More like deviant human sex tornado.

She goes silent for a few moments and I can tell she's trying to phrase her question about the Ben debacle in a way that doesn't set me off.  I decide to put her out of her misery.  "So I guess Harrie told you that Ben and I bumped into each other yesterday?"

I hear her sigh in relief I think.  "Yes, yes she called yesterday evening.  Ben called her because he was worried about you after you went off with some young man. Ben said he was rather aggressive and rude.  Was that your friend?  I couldn't think of whom he would have been talking about.  I said that to Harrie.  You don't know anyone like that."

I try and reign in my irritation. "Jake never said a word to Ben mum so I'm not sure what the rude and aggressive nonsense is all about.  He's being overly dramatic, as usual." I say coolly.   Though I suppose, the way Jake looked at Ben could have been described as rude and aggressive.  Murderous even.

"Jake?" she says.  "That was that your friend?  The one you stayed with? I don't know him?"

I take a deep breath. "He isn't technically a friend mum.  I've been seeing him.  It's very new, just a few weeks." There, it's out.  I'm surprised at how calm I sound. There's a short pause from mum's end.

"Oh I see. And you like this boy?" I can't tell what her tone is.  surprise, excitement, disappointment?  My mother is always a myriad of emotion. She can't decide how she feels about something until it's with hindsight.

"He's not really a boy mum." I laugh a little. I'm sure he wouldn't be considered a boy by anyone's standards. Though actually, maybe by mum's standards he would be.  "But yes, I like him."  I like him a lot.  I more than like him.  I might be falling in love with him.  Oh god.  Did I just admit that properly to myself?  I start to hyperventilate a little. 

"Well if it's getting serious with him you know we would like to meet him.  Your father and I.  To see if he's good enough for our baby girl," she says. 

"You mean good enough like Ben?"  I say shortly, immediately guilty for my tone.  And for bringing him up when I'm trying to talk to her about Jake.  Who apparently I'm falling in love with. I have no doubt in my mind that Jake is the complete opposite of who my mum would choose for me. Tattoos and scars and the accent.  God, she'll hate him.  And if somehow she could see past the superficial things she'd want to know how he makes his living.  Mum wouldn't be overly impressed with the word nightclub I don't think.  Dad would be less of a challenge though.  He's less impressed by money and status and more interested in whether a person is decent, and whether they stand up to their responsibilities, help out their fellow man, take care of their family etc.

That's why he's the best man I know.  No surprise that my dad was a free loving hippie back in the day, all the while managing to get his masters in medicine from Cambridge. 

"Darling you know we were all devastated when you and Ben broke-up." I think actually mum was more devastated than anyone.  She saw him as a well-educated, impeccably mannered surgeon/saint.  There couldn't be a better man for her youngest daughter surely.  The revelation that he was a lying, cheating snake was a big blow to her.  "But we just want you to be happy.  That's all we've ever wanted for you.  For all of you." She sounds sincerely sad and I feel even more guilty.

"Oh mum I know mum.  And I'm sorry, for snapping.  I am happy." I tell her.  Happy and terrified.  I'm falling in love with him?  How long did I have before I hit the ground?  "You will meet him, I promise.  I'm taking him to Rob's for dinner tomorrow which already feels like a baptism by fire, you and Dad right now would be too much too soon." I explain. 

It's also too soon to be falling in love with him but it seems to be where we're at so... oh god I'm still hyperventilating.

"Of course darling. I understand." she sounds a little dejected. She'll get over it.   "Oh did your father ask you about Fayence?" she asks, her tone immediately lighter.

"Yes he did.  I'm seeing Nick on Saturday so we'll have a chat about it then.  I will be coming I just need to check the dates out at work too."

"Oh maybe you could bring Jake to France?" she sounds excited at the thought.  For a moment I imagine Jake sunbathing by the pool with my dad and Nick chatting about...  what the hell would they talk about?  Nick likes football I think.  He prefers rugby though.  I shake my head.  Nope, not going to happen.

"Um... I don't know.  Too soon again, probably.  We'll see." I say instead to keep her happy.

"Ok, well say hi to your brother for me and let me know next week what your plans are? Its just that Harrie and George are coming out too and we need to pin down some dates with them so you don't all clash." she explains.

"I understand.  Ok I'll give you a call early next week mum." I say checking my watch.  I honestly can't remember a time when I wasn't on the phone dodging questions about Jake and Ben and France.  I'm falling in love with him.... Oh dear god I'm an idiot.

"Ok sweetie, speak soon.  I love you"

"Love you too mum."

Eventually later I manage to forage a dinner of roasted vegetables and cous cous from what I have lying around and get down to doing some work.  I have a paper to examine for the peer review board that I sit on once a month and I haven't even looked at it yet.  It's not long though before I'm no longer thinking about the necessity of a systematic reshuffle of A & E service provision and thinking instead about how I might be falling for someone I barely know, and who keeps himself a virtual secret from me. 

I know a bit about his childhood, and a bit about who he is when he's with me but the voice inside my head is screaming that I'm delusional if I think I know this man.  Can you fall in love with someone you only think you know?  Is the fact that he's largely a mystery part of the attraction for me?  How strange that I'm acknowledging the fact that I don't know him and that he's also acknowledged the fact that I don't know him yet here I am considering when I might be full blown in love with him. How the hell did this happen? How could I have let it happen so soon?  

That familiar pull and need to hear from him urges me to pull out my mobile and check my phone.  There are no messages from him.  I did say I would call him though, and he works at night, so he'll no doubt be doing whatever it is he does in that office of his every evening.   I try hard not to think about ruses, and seduction and pretty barmaids but fail miserably.   At least I know he's not sitting there wondering how the hell he got to the point where he's falling in love with someone he barely knows.  That's just my problem. 

I try to get back into my paper but my heart isn't in it. Instead I lean over and stroke Fred who's curled up in a ball on the pillow beside me.  He decided to forgive me at some point between the tin of tuna and quarter packet of catnip infused treats and I gave him as I sat down to my own dinner. 

Maybe I need to talk to Jake, find out where his head is.  Ugh the dreaded "can we talk" talk.  No I cant.  But I could maybe try and find out if this is at least semi serious for him and decide what to do from there.  I could maybe make it out of this with a just few minor injuries if I know what I am to him?   He said he wanted it to go somewhere, that night here.  Does that mean it's serious for him though or just that he just likes spooning and waking up with me?  There's a world of difference between those two.  God I hate the fact that I'm so bloody skeptical about men and their intentions, and that I always have to read more into it than what's there - like I'm looking for the red light signals so I can fatally diagnose.

No happier about my predicament I decide to switch the computer off and run myself a bath instead, a nice luxurious soak in the tub is exactly what I need.   I pour lavish amounts of bubble bath into my roll-top and light few scented candles about the bathroom and put on my favourite classical piano album to relax my busy head.  I could try playing the thing upstairs, that also helps.  I pile my hair on top of my head and dip my hand in to test the heat – ouch - then turn the cold tap on fully for a blast to cool it down.  The urge to hear from him comes over me again and I lift my phone.

//Just about to get wet (in the bath) and thought of you. We should definitely find out if It's big enough for two...soon... Ax//

I smile, wondering if whether if I asked him to come over right now he would.  I put the phone down and slip into the bath slowly, oohing and aahing at the temperature as it stings the tops of my toes and still slightly achy parts.   It's warm and smells magnificent and I lie back and close my eyes as the bubbles pop softly around me - I think I maybe even drift of for a minute.  Finally when it starts to cool I set about scrubbing every inch of my skin; exfoliating to within an inch of my life. So that I'm bright pink but velvety smooth  

So I'm falling for him.  It's a manageable situation.  Unexpected maybe but I know he has feelings for me.  I see it in the way he looks at me, the way he says my name, the way he worships my body when we are together.  I can wait for his feelings to mature like mine.  I say mature, but I can't help think what I've done is totally immature – falling like this, so soon.

Out of the side of my eye I see Fred walk into the bathroom and I turn my head.  Then I scream. Not Fred.

Ben is leaning against the bathroom door staring at me leisurely, a hot and wholly unwelcome look on his face.

**A Dark Fall is now Available on Ebook and Paperback on Amazon and Kindle Unlimited***